Simon Sinek argues that curiosity can replace snap judgments, especially among leaders in meetings. He recommends practical techniques: leave a simple reminder (e.g., a sticky note that says "be curious"), and when forming a negative narrative about someone or a decision, deliberately generate 20–21 alternative explanations for what might be happening. Doing so shifts group conversations from blame to questioning and creates opportunities-focused dialogue with team members.
Chapters
How do we replace our judgment? With curiosity. So there's a simple technique. There are simple techniques to do this. One is write yourself a little reminder, put a little sticky on your computer that says, be curious or ask questions. You'll be amazed how well that works. But especially in times when we're judging, especially when we're in groups of leaders, we're in meetings, you know, we can snowball into judgment really quickly. Let's say someone's performance is in decline immediately. They're lazy. You know, they're stupid. They don't understand. They're a problem child. All it takes is one person to break that judgment and say, well, maybe they're going through something. And there is a technique where, when you believe, when you start to form a narrative about someone or about something, that you force yourself to come up with 21 possible alternatives of what could be going on in their life. So are they lazy? Absolutely. That's absolutely a possibility. Are they a problem child? Are they toxic? Absolutely. Are they going through. Are their kids struggling at school? Maybe. Do they have problems in their family? Maybe someone's sick? Maybe. Do they have medical issues that they're hiding from us that they're too embarrassed about? Maybe. Like, my point is, can you go through the Exercise of writing 20 or 21 alternative stories of what could be happening, and all of a sudden we find ourselves talking about and treating that person differently. And it doesn't just come about people. It's also about decisions we're making at work. And all, again, in a meeting. All it takes is one person to raise of what if? And as leaders, the more we start asking each other and ourselves, what if? Or what are the opportunities? What are the possibilities? We'll find ourselves doing that with our people that when they come to us, instead of us correcting them and telling them that they're wrong, raising questions. But believe it or not, simply having a little reminder to be curious is really important.
