The Strangest Paradox of Leadership | Robin Sharma

This mastery session is called the strangest paradox of leadership. Our world says that if you are a leader, in many ways, it's about what you get. What I'm going to suggest to you with deep respect, being a leader is about what you give. And it's a paradox because as you give more, you actually receive more. But again, society has sold us this methodology and this philosophy that if we get from the world, if we get more income, if we get more from our clients, if we get more from our employees, if we get more from our sectors, if we get more from society, we will feel happy, we will be successful, we will be at the top of the mountain. We will live these epic, awesome and fulfilling lives. And I don't believe that's the case. And I haven't experienced that to be the case at all. To me, if you give and you are a humble instrument of service, everything just falls into place. And so what I wanted to do is really start off by talking about the new economy. The old economy was an economy of scarcity. It was like, there's not enough in the world, so how can I get as much as possible before it's all gone? The new economy that we do business in and that we live life in is one not of scarcity, but it's about generosity. And I think the person who gives the most wins. And that's just the world we live in right now. Whether you believe this or not. And you know, I've been at this for a number of decades, teaching leadership to many of the most successful companies in the world, whether it's a Nike or a Starbucks, a FedEx and IBM, Microsoft, J. General Electric, NASA. I've traveled the world, worked with many of the best firms, coached many of the best CEOs, billionaires, iconic, celebrated entrepreneurs. And a lot of people, let's say 10 years ago, were stuck in that old mindset, which is, I want to be a billionaire, I want to get as much money as possible, I want to get this social status. And that was really their game. But, but you know, the good news is some people are still stuck in that old worldview. The great news is the whole world is shifting in many ways. If you look at how people are branding, you look at how businesses are operating much more community centered, much more authentic, their advertising is much more real. They're giving back to the community and they understand the importance of building a brand and an organization that is authentic and aligned with better values. So that's exciting. The point is simply this. You hear me talking about Giving. And you say this isn't relevant to me as a leader, as an entrepreneur, as a business builder, I'm going to challenge you on that with great respect and great love, because you don't want to be on the path of obsolescence and be a dinosaur that misses the right angle. Turn and, you know, one quarter from now, you're left in the dust by the competition that understands we're not in the scarcity economy anymore. We're in the generosity economy. So what I'm going to challenge you to do is simply I'm going to walk you through some insights right now, but start thinking about this. What if Robin is right? The strangest paradox of leadership is not about what I give. The strangest paradox of leadership is as I serve more and help more people, I not only become more, I actually receive more. The first insight I want to offer to you, and I call it the 10x value obsession. Just make a brain tattoo, sort of a psychological wiring that you practice until the point it's unconscious and automatic, which is this. How can I give my customers 10 times the value that they have any right to expect? So whatever it is, whatever product you pour into the world, how can that product give them 10 times the value that they're expecting? That dominant mindset and way of being has colossal consequences. You see, most people can talk the talk. They don't walk it. They talk the talk. Yeah, I want to give. I want to wow my customers. I want to give great products. I want to give a great user experience, great customer service, maybe even to their friends. They talk a good game, but there's a misalignment between their vocabulary that they're expressing publicly and their actual internal intent. And when there is a misalignment with what you say and what you truly feel, even if what you truly feel is subconscious, you don't even know it. People feel it. So the first idea on this 10x value obsession, you really want to come from a place where you actually feel, I need to be an instrument of service. Robin is right. I want to be a giver versus a taker. I want to give these people who put food on my table that I call my customers take 10 times the value they have any right to expect. And once that becomes your emotional and your dominant way of being, people feel it, and it changes your behavior and it changes your performance. You actually go the extra mile. You actually start to wow. Your products are not mediocre. Your products are masterful. Your team is not average. Your team becomes iconic. Why because you're coming from that deep, emotional, passionate place that is far more powerful than the cold hard logic of let us make our numbers so that we satisfy our shareholders. Second idea, if you really want to shift and live this paradox so that you shift from scarcity to generosity, is under promise and over deliver. We live in an economy where just about every business under promises and they over deliver. Go into your local shoe store, go into your local, your local pasta shop, go into your local cafe, go into your local automotive shop, get onto most airplanes, deal with most technology companies, you read their branding, you read their advertising and it's lots of this is going to be a world class experience that you're going to remember until your retirement party when you actually do business with them. Because every moment in front of a customer is a moment of choice. You either live your values and your branding or you, you don't. And if you don't, you're on the path to being irrelevant. But most companies, and actually most people, or a lot of them, too many of them, it's all about over promising and under delivering. They sell you well, but they don't deliver you. Wow. And what I'm challenging you with great love and respect is under promise, actually under promise with your employer, under promise at your organization, under promise with your customers, under promise with your husband or your wife, under promotion, under promise with your children, under promise with your friends and say, here's what I'm going to do. And then go far beyond and over promise in terms of what you actually execute on and give to the world. And guess what? That allows you to become one of those rare air producers that is a merchant of wow. Every time people do business with you or interact with you, they get so much more than, than what they expected. And if you live out the rest of your life like that, you become legendary in the minds of people. The third insight I want to offer to you is a really key distinction point. Every single day, with your family, with your work colleagues, with the world, you have a choice. You can be a giver or you can be a taker. You can't be both. You see, there are too many takers in the world. In the relationships, it's take, take, take. They take your energy, they take your time, sometimes they take your resources and they don't give back. And that's not because they're bad people. It's because they're scared people. You see, your behavior is reflecting your emotional life and your belief system. And if you think the world is a scared place, Then you're going to take as much as you can before it's all gone. And a lot of people don't even know they're doing it. They've got this internal architecture of scarcity and they don't even know it. But they're breeding it out into the world and they're doing it in their relationships personally. They're doing it in their work life. They're doing it with the companies that they work with. You've seen those teammates. It's like take from the company, take the resources, take as much money as possible. And then they wonder why they don't get promoted. They wonder why they're not legendary within the company or within their industry. And it's because they are takers. But there's a different distinction point, which is shifting from the scarcity mindset where you take, take, take, and rising to a whole new mindset, which is not scarcity, but generosity and the behavior. Giving, you give to your company. You give value, you give your enthusiasm, you give your creativity, you give your passion, you give your values, you give your love. Yes, I use that word in the business context because great work is done from a position internally where you feel love. Love of serving, love of your craft, love of helping, love of inspiring. So the third decision point or the third inflection point is really shift from being a taker to a giver. And the irony and the real paradox is when you do this, you make more money, you get more promotions, you get more accolades, you get standing ovations, you get more applies, you get more happiness, you get more energy, you get more creativity. Because ultimately life wants you to win. But you can't win if you're a taker. You can only win if you're a giver. Two final points you want to shift from. Or, you know, talking about this paradox of leadership, you know, giving and taking versus serving, the fourth thing to really think about is this trust. To shift from scarcity to generosity and to shift from taking to giving. You really have to find the platform internally where you trust. You trust that, you know what, if I do what Robin is suggesting, my life isn't going to fall apart. I'm not going to take advantage of, I not going to get fired. I'm not going to be laughed at. I won't be ridiculed. Because look around, there's just too many takers. And so the starting point is really a trust. The idea that I'm inviting you to play with you trust that you know what it feels right inside for me to be a giver. It feels right inside for me to wake up every morning, be an instrument of service. It feels right inside for me to develop this mindset where I ask myself, while I journal or while I have my morning reflection time, how can I help the most people today? And that begins with this Trust. And just trust me, if you start doing this, it works. Now, I should share with you. Being a giver doesn't mean that you'll get walked all over on. You know, people have heard me share this idea, and they've heard me talk about this paradox of leadership. And they say, but, Robin, you know, when I try to be nice and when I try to be helpful, when I try to give, when I try to be super.