WOMEN, WAKE UP TO WEALTH IN 2024

Have you ever met someone who is brilliant at business, an amazing author, a profound speaker and.

A war hero? Because that's who we're going to be Talking to Today. Dr. Sonya Stribling. She is an absolute triple threat and she is about to break your brain. For any lady out there who wants to learn how to speak, do coaching, write books, just change your life in general. Fasten your seatbelt because we about to take off. Dr. Sonia, how are you?

I am great. Thank you for having me. You were talking about me?

I was talking about you. I was talking about you.

I was like, wow.

Yeah.

Wow.

Yeah. Everybody else knows if you don't know, you're the only one don't know. So.

Indeed. So.

You were in the military. You don't mind if I start with your military experience?

No, go for it.

So you were in the military?

Yes.

Which branch again?

Army. The best branch.

The best branch. I would expect you to say nothing less. Okay, and what was your MOS in the military?

A little bit of everything.

A little bit of everything.

Yeah. So I started out enlisted. It was more of HR. We didn't call it that, but it was like 75 Hotel. Most people that don't know it was more. We call it behind the desk at the time. And then I switched over, I made a shift.

So you started out enlisted. For those of you who don't know what that means. That means you go to boot camp.

Yes.

To be a soldier, to be a groom, Basically a private.

You're at the very beginning.

You're at the bottom of the bottom.

Yes.

And then you got to work your way up. So what did you get your rank up to when you were enlisted?

To an E5.E5, which is a sergeant of some kind. Sergeant. I have to make sure I say that it was a sergeant. But the reason why I went to officer candidate school, we called it OCS. It's called a 90 day wonder. I had quite a few officers over me that were telling me what to do that was half as qualified as I was. But they had been in maybe a year and at this time I'd been in maybe four years. It was very quick. I went through the ranks very quickly and I decided it's time to go. But I had officers over me who recommended like, why are you not an officer? Why? It's like, what is that? I didn't know.

And an officer in the army is like an executive in business.

Absolutely right.

You're running stuff. You ain't doing stuff.

Absolutely.

You're running the people who Are doing stuff?

Yes.

Okay, and so. So you're a sergeant. And is that as high as you can go?

No. No. You can go to star major. No.

Sergeant major, sergeant major, sergeant major, which is kind of like almost an officer, but not quite.

Pretty much. They pretty much run things. But however, our pay is different, let's just say. Okay, so they call the shots. We get paid more.

Different pay grade.

Yes.

Okay, gotcha. Yes. So sergeant. But you made it to sergeant, and then you said, I'm gonna go to officer candidate school. Candidate school. Now, don't you have to have a college degree to become an officer?

Yes.

So you already have a college degree?

Yes. So when I joined the military, I had four years of college. And because of having a third grade education and really not knowing, and I wasn't around people who could tell me, hey, you probably need to take three more classes for you to get your degree. And I was not going to do anything else but go into the military. I knew. I'm the youngest of 12.

You knew from the age of 12 you were going to military?

I probably Knew probably about 10 years old because I used to see be all you can be this army street throughout the house.

You're like, I want to be all I can be.

But I didn't know part of my family was already in the military. We were. So the gap was they were so much older than I was and I didn't know.

Are you talking about siblings?

Yes.

Were so much older than you?

Yes. My oldest sibling is 81 years old.

Wow.

So it's like about 30 years older than me.

That's mind blowing.

Yes, it is.

My oldest sibling is a year and a half older than me, so. Yeah, so I get it. No, I don't.

So my dad, he pretty much was the father figure in the house.

Gotcha. Gotcha. And so you knew at 12 you wanted to go into the military because you saw an advertisement, you could be all you could be. Was it the travel? Was it the be all you could be? What part about it was appealing?

It was just more of the thing that you saw them do on commercials. It was like they were a community. You're. Honestly. I wanted to join the Marines. I gotta say that. That's what I thought I want. I saw them carry this log on their shoulder. I saw it.

Yeah, I've always wanted to do that.

Well, no, I was a tomboy back then. So it was like just all this adventure and I was trying to figure out what I was going to do with myself later on. I Had a child at 15 so that the dynamics of things changed. But I still needed to get out of my mother's house. Back then it was, you gotta leave at 18. Went to college, played basketball. That kept me out of trouble.

Played basketball in college?

Yes, I did.

What was your.

I was a point guard.

Point guard course.

Yes, yes.

Silly, silly question.

Played for the army, did all of that. So I joined the military as a private first class.

What did you major in in college?

Business.

You majored in business. Okay.

Nothing like what I do now.

It's a totally different animal.

Yes.

So you majored in business, and then after you got tired of people who knew less than you bossing you around in the military, you said, I'm going. I'm gonna be an officer.

Yeah, it was. We were out at training one day, and it was a lieutenant. He had been in maybe a year. I'd been in at 4 at this time. And he was telling me something, and I was like.

And it was like, this doesn't make sense.

Young kid, like I say, young. Young kid. 20, maybe 22, 23. At this time, I'm probably mid-20s, maybe almost 30. I think it was 28. 28 years old. And I said, this is enough. I went and took the test. It took me three years, mind you. Let me go back. It took me three years to take a class. Every year I took a class because I was.

Because you were three classes shy of.

Your degree, so you had to get.

Your degree before you could be an officer. So every year after you decided to be an officer, you went back, took a class, got a credit, took another class. Next year, got a credit, three years.

Because I was a mom, early mom, I was a young mom, I was a wife, and I had a military career. So I couldn't just go full time. So it took me three years. I went back, went to officer candidate school, 90 days. We started out maybe 30 women with 125. 30 women. 15 of us graduated, two minorities, and I was one of the minorities. It was not cut out for us, but nonetheless.

Oh, but you already knew.

Yes.

You had already decided.

Yes.

Okay. So you went into the military. You're an officer.

Yes.

But you're not just. You weren't just an officer, and you weren't just enlisted. You actually went to war.

Yes, combat. Yes, combat.

Like. Like missiles. What'd you say?

Missiles, bullets, bombs, everything. So they used to say, back in the day, Myron, oh, you were on the front line. And they always thought those particular. Moses, you had to be infantry or ordnance or something like that to be on the front line. Well, it's changed. I wasn't just sitting at a desk anymore. When I went outside by the fence, it was 360. This is what I call 360. That here I am a female, a mom, a wife at the time I'm away from, and I'm in somebody else's war in Iraq. And that was a game changer for me.

Was it hard for you to know who the enemy was?

Oh, absolutely. You couldn't see him, per se. I told people, I said, I think I'd rather be almost in a spiritual war than a physical war, because simply because a spiritual war, I know the enemy's coming, and I know what he's coming to do. Now. I knew what the physical war was, but you couldn't really see them. You didn't really know other than hearing a big voice go off and saying, incoming. And it could be at the drop of a dime, you could be walking to the bathroom, you could be walking to dinner. You walked everywhere. Fully full gear. It's 125 plus degrees outside.

And you got helmets and bulletproof vests.

Everything, guns, everything.

M16s, everything, everything?

Yes.

And.

You'Re an officer, so you have troops under your control?

Yes.

Are they called troops?

Is that soldiers?

Soldiers. Soldiers under your command? Not control, but under your command?

Yes.

Okay. How many soldiers you have under your command?

Depending on where I was when I was a commander, I would probably have about two to 300 at a time.

Okay.

When I was at a MEPS station as a commander, we would have civilians come through. The MEPs is where you go to enlist in the military, take your physical, your test, and all of that. So I was commander there. You would probably have, at any time, maybe 100 people that would come through at any time. When I was in Iraq, we probably had about 25. But the thing was, it wasn't 25 people. 25 people, however, because of the position that I had in Iraq as a battle captain, it wasn't that. It was 30,000 to 60,000 more people that I was responsible for tracking. If there was a kia, which is killed in action, mia, missing in action, it wasn't just military. It was civilians as well. So we're in Iraq.

Okay. I don't understand what you mean. Why are civilians there?

Oh, they're contractors.

Oh, okay. And they get killed, too?

Yes, absolutely. Absolutely. They're at war as well. So it wasn't just us in uniform. You got Army, Air Force, Marines, Navy, all Of us, plus civilian contractors. That is the first time I'd have had the utmost respect for civilians that were there not in uniform, but they were doing the exact same things we were doing, if not more.

But not in uniform. Not carrying weapons or carrying weapons.

Some.

Some carry weapons, not carrying weapons. They're just over there doing their job.

Yes, absolutely. Where it was. Ordinance supply, admin, whatever the case may be.

Mind blowing.

It is.

I didn't even see. I didn't know that.

I'm glad I can bring light to something that most people don't even think about.

Yeah.

Really.

On a scale of 1 to 10.

Like, compared to all the other things you've done in your life, where would you put that?

Being the best or the most exciting? Elaborate a little bit more.

Just being the hardest.

Compare it. Let me just compare it to what I do now.

Okay.

If I can be in a place like that for 15 consecutive months, away from my family, not knowing if I'm going to physically come back home alive, yes, I came back home, but my body. My body came. Mentally, I didn't come back. That's a different story in itself. But I would say that would be in the. The hardest thing I've ever done. It would be. Number one. Oh, I would imagine having a child would be. Number two. Giving birth, natural birth to three children.

Number two.

Number two. And if I had three top things, building a business, I knew if I could deal with those things, I could surely do this.

Wow. It probably also gives you. And I don't know if this is true or not, so you can tell me I'm totally wrong and that's fine. But it probably also gives you insight into the fact that people are way more capable, capable of way more than they think they are before they actually put themselves in that situation.

Absolutely. It's. When you're there, you're not. You're thinking about one. The safety of your battle buddy that's there with you. You're more concerned with everyone else. And then you're thinking about yourself. And I know that's the difference. Even I was sharing with you earlier when we were talking. I would take a bullet for some people. Literally not even thinking about it. Depending on where we are. To put myself in harm's way to.

Make sure you're okay.

That I'm trained. Yes.

That's how you're trained.

Yes, absolutely. And so it carries.

So it's an automatic response. It's not.

No, you don't think about it. You don't think about it.

Okay. And so fast forward, and we're going to get to the business stuff, y'. All, but y' all need to. Y' all need to understand who's getting to the business stuff. Okay, so.

You were also injured in combat?

Yes, I was.

Do you. Do you want to talk about that or not?

Sure. Absolutely. I have post traumatic stress disorder where there are certain loud noises. I hear everything.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah.

Like full alert, even probably when you're sleeping.

My husband says I have dog ears. I hear people in the other room talking. I get easily distracted from noise, especially when I'm doing events. But it is because of where I was. We had to hear everything. You just couldn't be in a place aware of everything. So that traumatic brain injury where one night I'll never forget we're coming back from. It's called watch night for Sunday New Year's. You bring in a New Year's? I was in church when we had it there. We're in a combat zone at church, you don't have an option. Were at church, yes. And at that, we left.

Oh, watch night. That's what you meant when you said watch night? Like watch night service?

Yes.

Watch night service for New Year's Eve.

Yeah.

Okay.

Left there, came back to my room. It was probably 10, 15 minutes after. Took a quick shower. Remember getting in bed, you have to be fully dressed. You're not getting in bed with lingerie and all that. You're fully dressed. You have your weapon by you. And all I heard as soon as I laid out, it was like 12:17. I heard incoming. You have. When you hear incoming, you have seconds to get out. Grab your Kevlar, and I hit my head on the wall. That was there when the incoming explosion. Yes. As I'm running out of where I was sleeping, I ran out and I dove inside because it was close. You could hear the mortise. You can hear all of this going off. And, man, I'm smiling about it now. It wasn't funny then. I just remember blacking out for a second, just for a moment. And the only reason why I knew, because I heard somebody waking me up, getting emotional about it, stribling. You okay? I'm like, yeah, I'm fine. I didn't really know what happened until years later. When I say years because you continue on with the mission, that's the difference. I think that happens. Most people just stop where they are. We didn't have the time to stop.

And you got to evaluate.

Yeah, you have a couple of seconds, but that's it. After that Is game on. You go back to everything else. But my life changed that night. Completely changed. Shortly later on I came home, my body came back, but mentally I didn't come back.

So when you say you changed and what does that mean?

That's a near death experience where just the moment, in seconds, you have the opportunity to get inside of a bunker to make sure you're not harmed. And just being able to see it just feed away from you where it landed is a game changer. It wasn't the hitting your head that was a game changer. It's being able to see that you live with that for the rest of your life.

Being aware of the fact that like I almost left. Did I do everything I wanted to do? Yes. And am I going to make sure I do everything I intend to do from now on?

Absolutely.

So it gives you a different perspective on the past, a different perspective on the future, which absolutely changes your present.

It does.

Wow. Okay, so then how did you go from that to being in demand? Speaker, world renowned author, businesswoman. Like, I don't know, maybe I'm missing. Like, how does this. Like, that's a fairly major transition.

It was this I got back home, I start dealing with all of the things that are from war and combat that people talk about that as an officer, you're not supposed to talk about. First off, it's not supposed to happen to you. That was the. What is the. That is a facade that they painted that we're invincible. And I really thought I was, but when I came home, I had to deal with it. So I just remember going through this phase of suicidal thoughts, all of that. I went through a divorce, I went through all of these things.

And that was because. Was it because you survived and other people didn't? Was it because.

I can't really explain it was just this day. I just remember this one day sitting at home on my couch and I called it my suicide couch. That day I was gonna take my life. And my prayer was, lord, if you're gonna let me live, don't let me live like this. Cause I felt like a dead woman walking. That was the very day I said, if you would just help me. You know, you're negotiating, like, if you would just help me do this. I said, if you would just help me get through this, I promise you I will serve you with every part of my being.

Wow.

That very day on my knees, I just remember getting up in my entire life changing. And I made a promise and I kept my promise. So I went on this this thing. I'm not even call it. I went on this journey. I went on this journey.

A vision quest.

Oh, yeah. I began to see my entire life flash before me of do this. And I literally began to see things before they actually happen. I just needed to do the work to get there. So I went through this whole part of, you should be a coach. I'm like, coach? What are you talking about? But I had been coaching for years and not really getting charged. I was doing it for the military. I was doing it just because people would ask me my opinion on something.

And I just remember one day I just went live on Periscope.

Wow. That's the back of the archives.

Went live on Periscope and start sharing. I started out not as a business coach. I started out as a divorce coach because I went through a horrendous divorce after being married 18 years. And I just started going live on Periscope 10 o' clock every night. Because I knew what women were doing at 10 o' clock at night, when it was time to go to bed, when they were praying, they were crying, they were trying to figure out what they were going to do with their lives.

So you knew who your audience was. You knew where to make yourself findable for them, and you knew exactly what to talk to them about because you were there.

Yes. And it would be so remember Periscope days? There's a certain max number that can get in the room. We would max out. And people were sending messages on Facebook, I can't get in. I can't get in. Or on Twitter, I can't get in. I'm like, whoa, I'm onto something. Hadn't made an offer yet. Every day I cried, though, because the fact that I'm telling my life, I'm teaching. Yes, but what was happening when I was doing that? Myron? Every single night, it feels like it felt like dead skin was literally falling off of my body.

Because you're not holding it in now. You're like, you're dealing with it.

Oh, I'm just. I'm out there. My ex is like, I can't believe you're out here. People are sending me these videos and I'm like, oh, my gosh, this is working. But I kept going because I made a promise that I'm going to serve you with every part of my being. And one day I made an offer.

Like, hey, do you remember what your first offer was?

Yes. Divorce coaching. I would walk with you on this journey for four months. Didn't have a program or whatever. Women kept asking me, how can I work with you? How can I do this? How can I do that? I said, okay, it was just $1,000. Matter of fact, it was $1,700. Don't ask me what a $700 came from. I don't know for four months. And women began to come, and then they start to ask, well, can I work with you one to one. And I said, sure, I'll go to court with you. I would be in court. Yeah. I would be in divorce court. There would be their attorney, There would be my client, and I would be on the left. And every judge always asks this, who are you? That was free advertisement. I'm her divorce coach. I'm just here to walk her through the process. From attorneys to new clients in the room. Every single time. I did that for a short. Probably a year. Only a year.

So how much did you charge for that?

That was like 6,000. Back at the time, it was about six grand. And women were like. And then I knew my prices were too low because everybody was coming. And then one day I met an event, probably about a thousand women in the room. I'm speaking now. I'm traveling, speaking. I wrote a book about divorce. I'm doing all these amazing things, but it still didn't feel like it was enough.

Didn't feel like you're groove.

And I'm on a stage and I come off the stage and I'm learning more about offering from stage and selling. And this young lady walks up to me. I see her face and she says, Dr. Sonya, I need to talk to you. I've been following you on Periscope and there's a team of people and they said, hey, you need to go to the back of the room to purchase. She said, no, my husband and I are fine. What are you doing at this conference? It's about relationships. Bad relationships, actually. And she said, I've been watching you. I want you to teach me to do what you do. And I'm not even thinking, what do I do?

What you want me to teach you.

Took an order form, took it on the back. She said, how much would it be for me to work with you? I said, $10,000. She said, do you take American Express? She passed me her American Express card. We swiped her card. That was the beginning of business coaching. And I never looked back.

Wow.

And so what I realized is he just wants you. When I say he, God just wants you to get started. Once you get started, you'll see the path. You may not Be able to see the clear vision, but you'll see the path. That was the beginning of me changing and making this transition to business coaching.

Wow. Okay, so I'm just going to recap.

What I heard, of course.

And then I'm going to ask you if what I see is accurate or am I missing something?

Okay, go for it.

You're a 12 year old girl. You see an ad about being all you can be.

I see a sticker on my door.

Sticker on your door at home. Be all you can be. Like a bumper sticker?

Yes.

Join the army. Be all you can be. Cool. So you knew you wanted to join the army?

Yes.

You have a baby at 15?

Yes.

You get married at what age or did you go to college first?

I went to college first.

Went to college, almost graduated three, three courses short of graduating. You get married?

Yes.

When did you. And then you joined the military?

I was already in the military.

So you joined the military right after basic training?

I went to a specialty training. I met him at that specialty training.

So did you go to college first or.

Yes, I went to college first.

First. And then after you got out of college, you joined the military?

Yes.

And then you met your former husband? Yes. In the military. Y' all got married, started, have some other kids?

Yes.

And then you go off to war?

Yes, we both.

Was he in the war? He was in the military. So both of y' all at war?

Who's with the same war?

Who's with the kids?

They're with his parents.

Wow.

All three of them? We had three at this time. They were with the parents.

Okay, now I lost my train of. I'm like, I'm processing. Like, wait, what? Okay, so then you're in the military for how long before you decide you want to be an officer?

About four years.

Four years. And then you take a class every other year for three years before you can go to officer candidate School. Candidate school. So now you're in the military for seven years and then you go to officer candidate school, which is 90 days.

Now, mind you go back.

Okay.

At the four years I'm taking a class during those four years.

Right. Then I went to training during the first four years. So it wasn't three years after that? It was during the four years.

By the fifth year, I was already in officer candidate school.

I was fast tracking. Okay, you're fast tracking. Okay, got it. Then you go off to the military. You're in command of all these people, Civilians?

Yes.

Up to 60,000 people. 30 to 60,000 people under your Responsibility?

Yes. Tracking them. Yes.

And you're tracking them. And then you get injured, you come home. Was it like medical discharge or, like your time? You're just.

No time. No, I stayed in. No, I stayed in. I stayed in two more years after that. Almost 10, probably. Yeah.

Okay.

Almost 10 more years after that.

Okay, 10 more years.

Yeah.

Then you come out, you go through a divorce. It's not fun, not pretty.

I went through the divorce while I was still active duty military.

While you're still active duty military. And then you start coaching women on being divorced.

Yes.

And then somebody wants you to teach them how to take their life and turn it into a business. Like you turned your life into a business even though you didn't realize that's what you were doing.

Exactly.

So here's my question.

Okay. Can I jump in? I left out one thing.

Okay, please do.

At 17, I gotta put this in there because a lot of women that come, oh, this happened to me. Fifteen, I had a baby. Seventeen, I was raped and left for dead. So mind you, I mean, I feel like I've been in war my whole life, so why not?

Just being alive was a battle.

Yes, absolutely. So I put that in there. Just so you know, the premise of. By the time I got married, I shouldn't have, but I did. And 17, this, like, as a young woman, that changed the trajectory of my life.

Wow. It's a lot of stuff to go through. It is, but it's also a lot of stuff to grow through.

Yes. Oh, that's good.

And I believe probably, like, what I'm getting out of this whole story is.

Too many people go through things in their life that they're unwilling to grow through, and so they stay stuck in that moment of that event or that thing or that tragedy, as opposed to growing through it and letting it turn them into the person who can do the thing that will not just change their life, but will change the lives of other people.

Absolutely.

Am I missing something?

Oh, no, you got it right.

Okay.

Absolutely.

I just want you to know I'm paying attention.

Okay.

Okay. So now you go from you teach one person for $10,000. You swipe her car, you say, that was just $10,000. How long did you work with that lady?

Probably just four months.

Four months. And you're like, I'm gonna put that on, rinse and repeat.

Yes.

Right. And so you started selling business coaching, teaching women how to coach.

Yes. Teaching them how to take their life experience and their knowledge to build their own empire, just have their own economy that's what I was looking at because I saw so many women. I feel like we really take on the responsibility for everybody else. Like we're our spouse's wife, we're our children's mother, and we always come last. And that's how I felt like I was my entire life. I was taking care of everybody else in the military, I was taking care of everybody else, but I never really gave myself the opportunity. What is it that you want? And so I realized that it wasn't just me. I started asking, you're like, that's me too. That's me too.

And I was like, wow, it's a thing.

Yes, it is.

And so now you've. How long ago did you do that? That $10,000?

How many years ago was that?

Oh, it's almost six, seven years, maybe. Maybe eight. More like eight.

Eight years. Eight years ago you got your first. I'm going to teach you how to take your life experience turn into a coaching program.

Yes.

And since then you've coached dozens of women. Hundreds, Thousands. Like how many?

So 354,000 people just in the last three years from virtual live and in person events, teaching this inner circle. I sit back. That just hit me. That's a lot of people.

That's a lot of people. That's. That's a. That's not even a small town. That's a medium sized town.

But it doesn't feel like scratching the surface. Not at all. Yeah, not even close.

Okay, so what would you. I'm going to ask you a question about three different kinds of people.

Okay.

What would you say to the woman right now who's watching this interview? And she can relate to some of the stuff that you've been through, her version of that, which is gonna be different, clearly, for whatever reason, but it's gonna be similar because she's been through some traumatic, tragic, difficult situations. And so she thinks that because she's gone through those things that she's not valuable. Like, what would you say to her?

I look in the camera, even say it to her. You think that it happened to you, but it actually happened for you. And it's not just for you. It's for the person that is coming after you that has been praying and think you showing up, she's been praying for you to show up. She doesn't know exactly what you look like, but she knows your voice. And as soon as you get in front of her or in front of them, they know instantly that you're the one. It is almost like Myron that it's a setup. Like you've been set up from the time before you came out of your mother's womb to do this, and you don't even know you're built for it. I can't. If you went back and asked me what happened then, and some of you, I don't know how I got here. I know it's by the grace of God. I know that. But I don't know how in the world did you go from 15 years old having a child to now having a high success.

It's your business. That's mind blowing. And most people, like most people, would say that's an unlikely success story. But I submit to you, I believe, based on what you said and based on what you just told those ladies, I believe that it's the unlikely that makes you the success store. Because otherwise it'd just be like just another day in the life of Sonya. Right? But instead she goes from this girl who has a baby at 15, who gets raped at 17, who goes off to the military, gets injured with an ied. And now one of the things you said was so powerful, it didn't happen to you. It happened for you. Everything that happens to you happens for you. And the worst stuff that ever happens to you in your life is the stuff that sets you up for the best stuff that ever happens to in your life, if you're aware. But if you're not aware, if you think, oh, it just happened to me, and you missed the flip side of that. You miss out on so much, but the people you were sent to serve miss out on so much.

See, I think one of the biggest things we have to understand is there's a difference in powerful women and strong women.

Okay?

Strong women are just surviving. I could have easily been just a strong woman. I was raised by a strong mom. It was just about survival. There was no conversation about thriving. And when you come over to this powerful place, it is. We're taking what happened to us. And it's not a woe is me. This happened to me. I share the story openly, but I don't share it for as woe is me. Because everybody doesn't have a trauma story. I have to understand that. And it's okay if you do or you don't.

Right?

But it's not okay for you to still be at this day and age as a grown woman, still talking about just surviving. At what point do you get to. I'm thriving. And the biggest thing is you could take what you've been through and Help somebody else overcome. It no longer was about me, Myron. That day I said that prayer, it wasn't about me at all.

So interesting. That just reminded me. That reminded me of something Jesus said. He who will be greatest among you, let him be servant of.

Of all.

So what if. What if. What if instead of looking at all the stuff that happened to us as just trauma or tragic stuff that happened to us, what if we looked at it as God preparing us for what he already has, prepared for us to serve people?

If everyone looked at it that way.

The world would be a different place, wouldn't it?

I believe some cultures would have a financial turnaround so fast that they wouldn't do.

I saw what you did. That was good. That was really. No, that was really good.

It would be a game changer for many families.

It would be a game changer for many families for sure. Second question for the people watching right now. What would you say to the woman who is successful?

She's either got a really thriving business or a thriving career in a business. She's an executive. Maybe she's making six figures high six figures, maybe even seven high seven figures. But she hates what she has to do to make that money. And she wants a life by design instead of a life by default. But she feels like there's no place else I can go and make this kind of money. What would you say to her?

Before I jump into that, let me share. I did work in corporate America outside the military for nine long months.

Nine whole months. I don't even know how you lasted.

No, it was long.

Long.

Yeah, it was just a long night. And when you said that I was an executive because the golden handcuffs were calling my name because they told us traditionally that's what you're supposed to do. So I was after you get out.

Of the military as an officer, you go become an executive. And you had a business degree?

Oh, absolutely. And then I had a HR degree. And then I went back and got a PhD thinking that they was going to help me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

As a counselor. So I thought all of that was going to help me be highly successful. I thought that was going to help me be. Because I had this thought, Myron, I wanted to be a millionaire. Hadn't been around them, but I knew there was something out there. And I said, if I didn't come from a wealthy family. I heard somebody else say it now. I said, if I didn't come from a wealthy family, let a wealthy family come from me.

I quote you all the time. I Give you credit for it every time.

I appreciate that. I got it from somebody. I can't remember where it came from. It was just in passing. I think I added some words in there somewhere. But nonetheless, I would tell her if she's in this job, and I'll say it like everybody else says, it just over broke. If they decided to let you go today, what are you gonna do? What are you gonna do? If they decided they don't need you anymore and they're gonna go hire somebody.

They can pay somebody else half the money to do more work and you.

Help the company generate millions.

Come on now.

Why are you not generating millions in your own business? Say that they send you to school, they do all these things. And I would just say to her.

Act like they're doing you a favor.

Oh yeah, I would just ask her, how's that working out for you? You're in a cubicle or in your own office going to work every single day away from your family. They tell you when you can take lunch. They tell you when you can take vacation. You get two weeks.

They tell you when you can go.

To the bathroom, when you have a doctor's appointment. I played. My son played for the University of Michigan at one point, the middle son and I had one in high school. I would do Friday Night Lights. I was working in corporate. I would go to work till about 6 or 7 o'. Clock. I started on the side a divorce coach. And then I went over to counseling. I would drive after a 10:30 game at night on a Friday, I would drive 12 straight hours to the University of Michigan to be in the big house for a one o' clock game, no sleep. And I did that for a year. No, those nine months, full year, I was exhausted and I said, I can't do this.

I almost fell asleep when you was telling me, I'm so tired. I was falling asleep at the 112 hours.

12 hours to make sure I was there for my son. Because they wouldn't give me the time off on Monday or that Friday, so I couldn't do it. Plus I had. It was just a lot. And I just sit back and the women that are coming now are more executives because they're trying to figure out what else am I good at. I'm not fulfilled. Yes, I'm making six figures, but I'm not fulfilled. I want to be able to enjoy.

My time with the people you care the most about doing the things you'd rather do instead of the things you'd rather not do.

And why not do something you love. I know without a shadow of a doubt most of these women are already coaching. They're just not getting paid for it.

So did you. Did you have somebody growing up encouraging you to go do great things? Like. Like what?

The conversations at the round table or the table with my mom. Stay away from boys and don't get pregnant. I did the opposite of what she said. That's what happened. It wasn't until I was coaching anyway. I would find service members when we were deployed. Wherever I went, I always had a room full of people. It was normally a Thursday night. We come in, we talk about finances, and the rooms kept getting bigger and bigger. And someone saw me and said, hey, you ever thought about coaching? Would you call me? Because it was a curse word. I didn't know what coaching was. I didn't. I was still active duty, military. And he said, you should think about coaching. He was a sergeant major, the senior person in the military. And he said he saw something in me.

Wow. And he said, you should think about coaching.

And once a week, we met, just. I can't remember what we talked about. I just kept thinking, man, this may be too hard, but I got to figure out what I'm.

It's interesting how, like, when we. When the path is not clear, that we fight for our limitations. Isn't that interesting?

Yes, it is.

But there's another lady I want you to address. So we addressed.

The woman who feels like we addressed the executive. What would you say to the woman who doesn't value herself because she's never been apparently valued by the people around her? Like, because I think it sounds to me.

You'Re 15. Like, you're 12. You have a vision. You're 15. You have a baby, you're 17. You get raped, you go to the military after you graduate, after you almost finish college, you get married, you have children, you go through a divorce, you're enlisted, you have this.

Lieutenant who's still wet behind the ears telling you something that you know doesn't make sense. And I ain't putting up with this no more. Like.

It doesn't sound like people were saying, you are going to be a superstar, go change the world.

So it was the opposite. I was voted least likely to succeed in high school.

That's so crazy. That's the first time I've ever heard of anybody other than me.

Are you serious?

I didn't even get least likely to succeed. It was worse than that. I got most likely to get on your nerves award.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

So people Are so mean, aren't they?

They can be, yeah.

So mean. But it's okay. They help. They're there for reason.

Oh, that's the fuel I bet I get. I bet I'm really getting on the nerves.

Exactly.

So how about have yourself some of that right there? Okay, so. So what would you say to that woman who feels like she can't, she's not worth it. She's not worthy. Who wants to hear from you? What have you done?

Permission is for parking tickets only.

Mm.

It's just for parking tickets. It is not for you to wait on somebody else to tell you what to do. It's just not there. That's not what we're here for. And once I came to that realization, I don't need anybody else telling me, what did God say about me? When that whole thing. When I started thinking, what did he say about me? And it wasn't, he said it about her. And he said about her. No, he said that about me. And I started thinking, if I had a daughter, only have sons, if I had a daughter and I was sitting down with her, would I be okay with her coming to say, no, mommy, I can't do this, or no, mommy, even with my sons, I don't feel this way. Is it okay? It's not okay for you not to want to do something powerful or something great and you have to get somebody else's permission? And what I realize a lot of women, they do not want that for.

Their children, but they're okay with it for themselves.

For themselves.

She is sitting back somewhere thinking, I'm not good enough. I can't do this. Well, you know, Dr. Son, you have a degree. The truth be told, all my degrees got in the way. Well, they got in the way. I remember once, Myron, I got some coaches back then that were helping me, and it took me 90 days to get my mind right. Not 90 days with a strategy. 90 days to get my mind right, to give myself permission to say, it's okay for you, to ask for what you're worth. One day I made an offer. It was a quarter of a million dollar day. I freaked out. I'm like, oh, my goodness, I need to do this again before it runs out. I need to. I've been doing it for the last almost 10 years. And it wasn't because of the money. It was the simple fact that I realized I was onto something and that people were open. It's just like non traditional education. We'll go to college, we'll do all those things.

Oh, for real? For real.

But when it comes to self development, business development, it's like a struggle.

Have you helped women make six figures?

Oh, yes, I've helped women make seven figures.

I kind of had a sneaky suspicion that would be the answer.

Yes.

But I think it's important for people to hear that because when you think about how many people graduate from college and can't even get a job making the amount their college costs per year.

And they're still paying for college, and.

They'Re still paying for the college loan 20 years later, even though they're not doing anything with the piece of paper they hung on their wall. Except maybe hanging the piece of paper on their wall. That might be a clue.

Imagine.

In the next 90 days.

Imagine in the next 90 days, you really focus.

One thing the military taught me very well is about you do not quit until the mission is complete. You leave no one behind.

Now, what I have to add, I'm not dragging anybody. I weigh a buck 25. I cannot carry anybody on my back, but I can walk hand in hand with them. So imagine that 90 days we gave ourselves to sit and focus on what in my life has happened that somebody else could learn from and glean from. And I give them, I call it the cake recipe. You know, when you think about, I like red velvet, okay? My mother in law, my ex mother in law per se, had this great red velvet cake recipe, okay? And there was particular things that she put in it different from everybody else. And if you followed those very instructions, you had a perfect red velvet cake melt in your mouth. It tastes so great. I call it a cake recipe. Take the cake recipe, give them instructions on what to put in your particular cake that you're helping them build and help them get the results that they want, but help them get there faster. If you would just do that very thing and don't overthink the process about, oh, it's gotta be perfect. Because most perfectionists that I know are broke.

With that. And so just thinking about the cake recipe, thinking about giving them very clear instructions on what to do and not overthinking the process, Imagine where you could be 90 days from now.

Wow, that's so cool. So a cake recipe. So basically what I think I hear you saying is becoming successful is like baking a cake. All you have to do is follow the instructions.

Yes.

That's awesome. Now, something you said earlier, and I'm fascinated by it, but I think I could use a little clarification. You said permission is for parking tickets.

Yes, it's actually, validation is for parking tickets only. And what I. Yes. Validation is.

Now I get it. Because people are walking around looking for validation from other people all the time, and they don't need it.

Yes.

Because the fact is, your life story and your life experiences are your validation. Yes. So you don't need to get it from somebody else.

Absolutely.

Go ahead with your bad side. So.

Now that you've addressed the three different avatars of women who are watching this video right now, I know you got a new book coming out.

Yes.

And the COVID is Fire. I'm sure the inside of the book is even more fire. Tell us about that new book.

The title is from the Battlefield to the Boardroom.

From the Battlefield to the Boardroom. Wow.

Yes. And most people, when you look at it, when I thought about it, I said, I want to make sure it's for all women that really need this, because I didn't want the battlefield to be too much. But what I realized that we all have our own battlefield. It doesn't have to be a physical battlefield. It could be a mental battlefield. It could be a financial battlefield.

Cover is fire. I'm sure the inside of the book is even more fire. Tell us about that new book.

The title is from the Battlefield to the Boardroom.

From the Battlefield to the Boardroom. Wow.

Yes. And most people, when you look at it, when I thought about it, I was like, I want to make sure it's for all women that really need this, because I didn't want the battlefield to be too much. But what I realized that we all have our own battlefield. It doesn't have to be a physical battlefield. It could be a mental battlefield. It could be a financial battlefield.

It could be a relationship spiritual battlefield.

Yes.

One of the things I tell people, in fact, I did a video on this called Poverty is Always the Result of Spiritual Warfare.

Ooh. Ooh, that's good.

It is.

It's the truth, too.

And so every. If you broke you in a battle, and you may not know it, but you about to find out.

Right? So. So from the Battlefield to the Boardroom. That's so good.

A woman, infinite desire to win in life, business, and career.

Mmm. Let's go.

It's just time.

It is time.

It is time for, I would say, more women to step up to the plate. And I tell people, I don't train ballerinas. I don't train princesses.

Come on here.

I train warriors. And it's for women that are warring for the life and the legacy that they want to build.

Wow. So good. So good, Doc. So people that want to connect with you, they want to learn from you. You teach people how to do coaching. You teach them how to do speaking.

A triple threat.

Be a triple threat. Okay, tell me about the triple threat. Tell me about the triple threat.

There is no way that you should be an author and not be coaching and speaking. And I know somebody's gonna argue, no, you shouldn't do that. Be a triple threat. If you really think about it, if you take your life and put it in a book. Now, I'm not talking about. We're not Oprah and Michelle Obama. Just. It's a memoir. It's about my life. No, no, no. Give them some learning tools, some te. That they can apply to their life. Based on what you've been through. Right. Think about being a speaker. You're already speaking anyway. You're speaking in front of kids. You're at church on Sunday. Speaking. You're at the corporate. Your corporate job has you speaking on stages, and they're not paying you anything extra. Well, why don't you take your voice. Give your voice a story in a bank account is what I say.

Let's go.

And so if you're out here speaking, why don't you just get paid to speak and share? And then the third one, coaching. We're doing it anyway.

Might as well get paid for it.

Might as well. And sooner than later.

So can I give you a title for your sequel for your battlefield to the board?

Yes.

The Triple Threat Trifecta.

Oh, okay. I like it. We're gonna do that one right after this one.

Yeah, that's like the Triple Threat Trifecta. Why every woman should be speaking, coaching, and writing books.

Done. Let me go ahead and get that out there now before this is out there so we can have that part.

That part.

It does. Done. For sure.

Wow. Yeah. You. What you're doing is amazing. How you're helping women is amazing. The success stories of the people who are working with you are remarkable. Your success story. First time I ever met you, I'm like, you doing what? I mean, you clearly, you were. You're. You're a superstar. But most people are. They just don't step into it.

But we need to get in rooms with other superstars like yourself. And I remember when I met you, I said, I can learn from him. I can follow his lead. I can listen and sit at his feet. That's one thing I really want you to know how amazing you are. And I'm not just saying it because we're sitting here, but you really are. And how you teach us in such a way. I need to learn like a third grader.

And I, I, everybody does, though. I. You know what's really, you know what's really interesting to me? It's interesting to me that most of us are children at heart, but we've been programmed to manufacture a plastic avatar of what we think an adult is, and that's what we show everybody. And most people put the little kid inside of them in a closet somewhere in the booth, in the back, in the corner, in the dark. And I know for a fact that we will be far more impactful if we will let the little kid in us connect with the little kid and the people we serve. Way more than trying to impress the adult. We serve with the plastic avatar of the adult in us.

So over trying to impress people, like, so over it. Not at all. Press up on them, but not impress them.

Come on now.

Yes.

So the impact is way more important than being impressive.

But I really thank you for being bold enough to stand up and share. We needed. I needed you when you showed up. I'm in Australia speaking, and I'm doing great things, and somebody's like, hey, have you met this dude? His name is Myron Golden. I'm like, no. Shortly after that, you start popping up all on my social media. I was like, who is this guy that I don't know? And he's teaching.

Solomon the principles. That was a game changer, Myron. There weren't people, most people that were teaching at that time. It was more about the spiritual journey. But I would say it was more religion than a spiritual journey. I connected right away. It was before the pandemic, what have you. You said Florida. I was on a plane. I drove because at that time it was kind of scary to get on planes. I drove to you. I remember almost every month to learn, and it's been a game changer. Sometimes you need. I shared with you once, remember I said, myron, I'm going to borrow your confidence until I have my own. And so I share that with my clients. Just borrow mine. And yours is so big. I'm like, I need that. Because there are times even when you believe you've made it, there's always room for growth. I just thank you for being that, that model, the visionary who helps me see, because I believe all coaches need a coach. We all have our blind spots.

A coach that does not have a coach does not deserve to be your coach.

I'm not working with him. I'M sorry if I don't know. You're not working with anybody and I don't have to know exactly who it is.

I just got back from a five day mastermind. I mean, we're doing all right. You know, our business is doing all right. And I just got back from a five day mastermind sitting under my coat, letting him coach me and a couple people from my team on what we the moves we need to make. So, yes, woe be unto me if I think I have all the answers.

You know, when it really hit me, and I'll say this is when we realized that over 300,000 women that we've been able to serve but helping them, the inner Circle, generate $18 million in the last three years.

Let's go.

That in itself in having a 28 million. And I say, let me explain why I say these numbers because I realize most women are not going to drop receipts. I sit at a roundtable with other millionaires, mostly men. First off, I'm kind of tired of being the only woman at the table majority of the time and I want my sisters to join me. But I realized because we don't really say numbers, it's something in us that we can talk about relationships, we can talk about our hair, we can talk about our makeup. Oh, definitely, definitely close. But when it comes, don't forget shoes now. Oh, yeah, you're right. You're right, right, right. But we will not drop numbers and receipts. And it's not to brag or to boast. It's to let someone know. Least likely to succeed.

Yeah, this is possible.

Absolutely.

Yeah, it's possible for you.

Absolutely. Yeah.

That's good stuff. So somebody who desires to connect with you, be coached by you, learn from you, be in a space with you. Where should they go?

Women speaking grow rich.

Women speak and grow rich.

Can I elaborate a little bit? Yes. Women speak and grow rich. But I would say more. So go to DrSanyaBrands.com and find out even more because I know we did this, but just read more. And I realize some people may not be ready right now, but if nothing else, follow me@drsanyabrands.com on all social media platforms. I am Dr. Sonia. Because there's a lot of things going down that I know a lot more women need to protect, partake in, or just count themselves worthy.

Yes, Worthy.

On this journey to your next level. Good 20. This upcoming year is about the year of elevation. Last year was about expansion. This is elevation. Because there are some things that are about to happen that most of us cannot imagine about to level up. Level up. I was going to do the dance, but I can't do the dance and sing the song. But yes, absolutely.

Good stuff, Dr. Sonia. Good stuff. I appreciate you. Like, I learned things today that I had no idea about. And just like you said something, you said, you know, you're with somebody and they train you to jump in front of a bullet.

Yes.

The thought to jump in front of a bullet, honestly, has never crossed my mind. I appreciate how you've turned your life experiences that were not all pleasurable into something that can be, can be profitable for other people.

Yes.

So thank you for being who you are and showing up the way you show up. And congratulations on all your success. And congratulations to your students who are smart enough to know that working with you was their best chance at their best life.

Absolutely. Thank you. My pleasure.

Thank you.

Thank you.