Dallas Bragg, a chemsex recovery coach, explains why a text from an old dealer or partner can trigger a full-body reaction: racing heart, heat, shaking limbs. The bonds formed in the chemsex scene feel like first love and rewire your brain. His answer is building a support infrastructure so you can pause and reach out instead of responding.
When you get a random text from a past dealer or user friend after weeks or months or even years being substance-free, it can be a full-body triggered response. But what are you actually triggered by? Hi, my name is Dallas. I'm a chemsex recovery coach helping men who have sex with men. The relationships that we form inside the chemsex world can feel deep, they can feel meaningful, and often form a bond that we haven't experienced yet in the quote-unquote normie world. So when they realize you've blocked them, they text you from a different number, track you down. It can be very jarring. Your body might go hot, your heart race, your limbs start to shake. You might shift into full euphoric recall. And what many men are missing though isn't the chemsex use. It's that relationship, that validation, that attention that they got from that man, the chemical bonding that occurred that can feel like your first love. An experience ingrained in your neural pathways. You might feel instantly hijacked when these instances occur, when you get this text. This is when communication infrastructure is important. If you've made a practice of checking in daily with your recovery team, being transparent about your cravings, any thought to use that's voiced, then it'll be easier not to be overtaken by this text. You will take some breaths, you'll pause, and you'll reach out for help. It is very important to name the bodily feelings and then regulate to decide whether or not to respond to this text. But you must have built the communication muscle first in order to not fall into the trap.
