When someone loves a person using substances, they can lose their own identity trying to fix them. The codependent partner feels needed and valuable only when managing the other's life, tying their self-worth to being relied upon.
The person that has substance use and the person that loves them is probably suffering with this. And it's a way of relating to another person where you have lost sight of your own self, your own individuality, your own worth and value. And in a way, you are trying to gain your worth and value by helping or managing or fulfilling a need for another person. Yeah. Right? Like, that's not the entirety of codependency, but it's a very big wing, right? Right? Of like, and so there becomes this cycle of maybe even it started when you met the person. Let's say there's a romantic relationship, right? Like this person over here needs me for whatever reason, right? Because they're disorganized and they need me to help them get their life together, right? Or, or, you know, it could be like, oh, they drink too much and they're trying to get it together or whatever, right? That's when it starts. Right. You know, and then This person is like, oh, I can help. Yeah. Right? And then they help that person and they feel good about themselves and they like the help, right? Like, yeah. And then it's like, I have worth and value because this person is paying attention to me and really like giving me everything.
