Dallas Bragg speaks to people in recovery from crystal meth about the inner critic that returns once the drug is gone. Meth silences self-doubt and rumination, but stopping means facing those thoughts again. Real recovery means befriending that inner voice instead of using drugs to escape it.
You quit crystal and now the voices in your head are even louder than ever. After the smoke clears, we are then faced with our own thoughts, our own patterns of self-deprecation, negative self-talk, ruminating about the past. All of those voices were silenced by meth, which is what you're really addicted to. And now you're faced with, you could do better, don't get comfortable because you're going to fuck it up, remember what you did, etc., etc. You are so used to the inner critic that you even think that voice somehow makes you perform better. Or keeps you sober, but that's not true. Those voices keep you suffering, not sober. And now that you've quit, it's time to do the hard work. Getting to know, making it your ally, and integrating the relationship with that voice is what recovery is all about. It's tempting to use meth to get instant relief from these voices, but trust me, the price you pay is not worth it.
