Dallas Bragg, a recovery coach for queer men, argues that shame and self-judgment trap people in chemsex addiction. He says traditional recovery fails because it reinforces the identity driving the behavior. Instead, replace judgment with curiosity and compassion to understand why the behavior exists.
All right, so what's the one thing that keeps you stuck in the addiction cycle longer than the substance itself? Hey, I'm Dallas. I'm a recovery coach for queer men who want to break free from the addictive patterns of chemsex and live their best and highest life. Listen very closely. Why so many of you can't seem to get recovery right and make a recovery program work for you is this statement: judgment is the fuel of addiction. Not the solution to it. Every time you shame yourself for using every I'm so weak thought, you're feeding the core identity that drives the behavior in the first place. When you feel fundamentally bad about yourself, what do you naturally want to do? Escape that feeling. And what's your most reliable escape right now? Yes, you guessed it. This is why traditional approaches that focus on changing behavior while reinforcing shame and judgment don't work. Work long term. The most transformational approach for queer men is removing judgment entirely. This doesn't mean accepting harmful behaviors. It means understanding that the behavior exists for a reason that deserves compassion. When you shift from judgment to curiosity, from why am I so messed up to what is this trying to give me, Everything changes. Recovery is possible when you become the observer, not the victim of your patterns. Being drug-free becomes natural when you stop fighting yourself and start understanding yourself. Send this to someone who could benefit from it.
