Dallas Bragg traces perfectionism to a survival strategy, especially for gay men facing rejection and bullying who believe flawlessness prevents attack. He points to an unmet need for physical safety and suggests grounding practices as a healthier path.
Here are some of the main examples I've noticed when it comes to perfectionism. There's the need for safety and security. This is most common. Your perfectionist developed partly as a survival strategy. So for many gay men who grew up feeling unsafe, whether from family rejection, bullying, societal homophobia, perfectionism offered a shield. And how this manifests is, if I make no mistakes, I won't be vulnerable to attack. So the unmet need is to feel fundamentally safe in your body and the world. Here's a healthier alternative: developing a felt sense of physical safety through grounding practices,
