Saying no to a bad habit isn't enough without something to say yes to instead. The speaker uses an ABC framework to identify what needs the unwanted behavior fills, then find healthier ways to meet those needs. Without that positive alternative, you're just turning from darkness without a light to move toward.
I think this is so key in any form of healing a pattern, a habit, a compulsion, or an addiction, is that most people are just finding themselves trying to say no to the thing, just saying no, no, no, no, no, but we're not giving ourselves something else to turn towards. So we're trying to turn away from the dark. Yeah. We've got no light to turn towards. So when we look at that ABC, this is the part of me that's trying to fill in those gaps and give me what it is I really need, we can start seeking that in other places, other environments, and with other people. But until we know what those things are, all we're doing is, is just trying to turn away from something. And if we don't give ourselves something to say yes to, we're going to be drawn to that thing.
