Stop Looking for a Higher Power (its been you all along)

Hey there, Dr. Dallas Bragg here, recovery coach for gay men who want to break free from the addictive patterns of chemsex and live their best and highest life. Today we're talking about that triggering phrase so many of you get hung up on, higher power, and how you are actually your own higher power. If that feels intriguing or even triggering, keep watching. On this channel, you're also going to find lots of other resources to help you break free from chemsex and attain your best and highest self. Also, don't forget to look for my podcast. It's called The Aftermath Podcast, and it's here on this channel as well. I drop a long-form video just like this every Saturday, so please turn on the notification bell so you don't miss anything. By the way, if you're interested, I have a one-on-one coaching program and a group coaching program, both called Recovery Alchemy. The link to apply to the coaching program is in the show notes. Through weekly one-on-one sessions or weekly group sessions and daily accountability, your life could look much differently in 6 months Listen, there are powers greater than our individual selves. This is undeniable. Also my opinion. You might draw strength from nature's cycles, from ancestors who walked difficult paths before you, or guidance from your highest self, that version of you that already exists in the future that's calling you forward. These forces are real and they matter. You can borrow power from these resources. You can seek their guidance. A prayer can center you. A walk in nature can restore you. Imagining your future self can give you courage. These powers exist as a repository of wisdom and strength available for you. It's available for you to access whenever you want. It's always there. But here's the critical distinction. They are supplementing your journey. They don't control it. They don't make your decisions. They don't get credit for your choices because you are the ultimate higher power. Traditional recovery is going to tell you that everything can be your higher power except yourself. You've been conditioned to feel powerless, incomplete, like you need something or someone else to be in control of your life experience. Basically, you need a savior. Does that sound familiar to you? But here's what you're not used to hearing. You are the ultimate higher power in your life. Free will is what animates you. Free will is the force that makes you the creator of your own story, the author of your own narrative. Each choice you make is a sentence you write. And if you don't write it, the outside world writes it for you. So at the end of the day, in that decision moment, nothing and no one else matters but your final choice. Not your sponsor, not your therapist, not your family, not even the divine forces you pray to. They can all offer wisdom. They can all offer support. They can all offer perspective. But the choice, the actual exercise of free will, belongs to you alone. This isn't about isolation or rejecting any support. All the external sources, the sponsors, the coaches, the therapists, the friends, the spiritual practices, they all serve one purpose. They help you find the answers that are already inside you. They are mirrors, not masters. They're your guides, not gods. They can slow down. They can They— sorry. You can slow down. You can access the wisdom within. You can recognize that you've always had the power. You just weren't encouraged to claim it, to use it. You've been controlled. By the way, I help gay men break free from the addictive patterns of chemsex and become their best and highest selves again. My one-on-one coaching program is a 6-month intense program that can literally change your life. And I accept 2 new clients a month. Apply in the show notes. All right, back to what we're talking about is your power, your power in action. So let's talk about processing a craving. Let's bring this into real life. You feel a craving, that familiar pull toward crystal. Your body remembers the relief, the escape, the intensity that crystal gave you. And here's where your ultimate power lives, the decision moment. Now, you might call your sponsor. Great. You might say a prayer. Powerful. You might text your coach or imagine your future self reminding you of who you're becoming. All of these can help you access your internal wisdom. But then comes the moment where it's just you and the choice. No one else can make that decision. Craving is uncomfortable. The craving may even be painful, but you are the executive of your own recovery, the author of your own story. You get to decide. What sentence you write next. Do you choose the chapter that moves you toward your highest self? Or do you choose the chapter where you continue to learn through relapse what— how to be your highest self? Keep in mind that neither of those decisions is wrong. There is no wrong choice if you take responsibility for it. What's wrong is believing there's a wrong choice. The power to choose is yours. It always has been. The craving is trying to convince you that you need the drug to feel okay. But free will Reminds you that you get to decide what okay means, and you get to create it without the substance. So in that moment, that choice, that's you exercising your ultimate highest power. You're not waiting to be rescued. You're not hoping something outside of yourself takes over. It's just you, your free will, and the story you are writing. You are creating reality through your choice. You are the author of this story. You're not the character only. So listen, circumstances don't create your reality. Your choices about the circumstances do. You've been taught to believe that life is happening to you, that the circumstances outside of yourself, a breakup, a job loss, a craving, a difficult family situation, are the cause of your state of mind. But this is backwards. Your circumstances are the effect of the choices you've been making in your mind. The narrative you've been writing. The meaning you've been assigning, the story you've been telling yourself about what those circumstances mean. This is your God-like higher power, the ability to create the reality you want through the choices you make about what those things outside of you mean. 2 people can experience the exact same circumstance and live in completely different realities because of the narrative they choose. One person loses their job and they write the story: failure, unworthiness, Another person loses the same job and writes a story of redirection, opportunity. It's the same circumstance, but completely different realities. The difference is the meaning they chose to create about the circumstance. When you understand this, you stop waiting for circumstances to change before you can feel empowered. You stop giving your power to external events. You recognize That you are the one writing the meaning, creating the interpretation, choosing the narrative. And that is what creates your lived experience. That's what creates the circumstances around you. It's all up to you, not some power outside of yourself. And this isn't about positive thinking or pretending that painful things in your life don't hurt. It's about recognizing that you have the power to decide what your circumstances mean and where they're taking you in your own story. That's the ultimate creative act, and it's available to you in every single moment of your life. Okay, so what do we do when your choices don't align, right? This is where your sovereignty is going to include self-compassion. Because let's be real, sometimes you'll exercise your free will and make a choice toward your disempowered self. You might use, you might engage in behaviors that you said you wouldn't. You might write a chapter you wish you hadn't. Here's what traditional recovery recovery would tell you in that moment. See, you are powerless. You are defective. You do need something outside of yourself to save you. But that's not the truth of sovereignty. No one is coming to save you. Being the ultimate higher power means you also get to choose how you respond to your own choices. When you make a choice that doesn't align with your highest self or your values, you still have power. You get to decide what that choice means. Does it mean you're broken and powerless, or does it mean that you're learning? Adjusting, and continuing to write the story. The authorship process isn't about perfection. It is all about perception. Every writer has sentences that they wish they could rewrite, but they don't stop writing and being the author just because they wrote something they didn't like. This is where self-compassion becomes an act of sovereignty. When you choose to meet yourself with understanding instead of shame, you're exercising your ultimate power. When you decide that a misstep is information rather than your identity, you create your reality. You don't lose your power when you make choices you regret. You only lose it when you hand the pen to somebody else and say, see, I can't be trusted to write my story. Somebody else do it. Your power includes the power to allow yourself to be human, to learn, to adjust, and to keep writing. That's not weakness. That's the ultimate strength. You've spent so long Being told that you're powerless. And now you tell yourself that story. But here, this is the truth. This is the truth that you've been learning to remember. The pen has always been in your hand. Yes, there are forces greater than yourself. Nature, ancestors, your highest self, divine intelligence. Draw from all of them. Borrow their strength. Let them reflect back the wisdom that already lives inside you. But never forget that they are supporting characters in your story. Not the authors of it. You are the ultimate higher power because you possess the one thing that creates reality: free will. The ability to choose meaning. The power to decide what your circumstances mean and where they're taking you. The sovereignty to keep writing even when you've written chapters that you wish you could erase. Because this isn't about being perfect. It's about being powerful. Even in your humanity, even in your struggles, even when you make choices that don't align with your highest self. Every moment, every new moment is a decision point. Every craving is an opportunity to remember who's holding that pen. Every circumstance is waiting for you to assign meaning to it. Every relapse or misstep is a chance to choose self-compassion over self-abandonment. You're not waiting to be saved anymore. No one's coming to save you. Also, you're not incomplete. You're not defective. You are not at the mercy of forces beyond your control. You are the executive of your recovery, the author of your narrative, the creator of your reality. The question isn't whether or not you have the power. You do. You always have. The question is, what story are you choosing to write? Love you all. Tell me your thoughts in the comments. I'd love to hear from you. If, and again, if you haven't subscribed, please do share this video, like all the good stuff. I'll see you next week.