Dallas Bragg tells gay men in recovery that anger from cultural shame and missing role models is a resource, not a problem. He describes the scene's dangers: apartments, saunas, pipe use, sexual exploitation. The work is channeling that anger to prevent relapse and build a new identity.
You are right to be angry that you grew up in a culture that made your sexuality a source of shame. You are right to be angry that you were given so few models of healthy gay manhood. You are right to be angry that the first place that welcomed you to— was fully— who welcomed you fully was a place that also poisoned you. You are right to be angry that this scene continues to operate openly While men die in apartments, saunas, hotel rooms, alone, holding pipes, getting G'd out, getting taken advantage of sexually. You are right to be angry that so few people understand what you actually went through, what you actually lost, and what you actually have to grieve. This anger is not a problem. This anger Can be fuel. This anger, if channeled correctly, is exactly what will keep you out of the scene when that pull to use returns. This anger, channeled correctly, is what builds your new identity. This anger says, I'm not fucking going back. Because I see clearly now what was done to me and what I was doing to myself. The work is not to get rid of anger. The work is to name it and use the energy it gives you to build something instead of burn something.
