A therapist working with aging gay men in chemsex recovery explains why shame doesn't help. Older clients often blame themselves, but drugs become a way to manage overwhelming emotions in the moment. Reframing use as a coping tool rather than a moral failing opens the door to actual recovery.
as much as my clients who are aging gay men and, you know, got into, you know, using drugs sort of later stage in life. And, you know, one of the things is that, oh, oh, I know better. Like, I'm an older gay man, or I'm an older man. I know I should know better. You know, how did I let myself get here? And I always say, no one, you know, is born and says, okay, I'm gonna be a drug addict when I grow up. You know what I mean? So just sort of orienting them around, of course, drugs was an accessible— I don't want to say easy, but certainly an accessible way of navigating those feelings in real time while you're in it.
