Dallas Bragg works with a client two months sober who fears relapse because he can't trust himself. Instead of asking "Can I trust myself?" Bragg suggests asking which specific parts feel unsafe. This move from all-or-nothing thinking to identifying concrete internal struggles opens a way to rebuild trust piece by piece.
A client sat across from me on Zoom and his face was just all frustrated. And he's like, Dallas, I've been substance-free for 2 months, but I still don't trust myself. I'm terrified I'm gonna fuck this up again. How can I move forward when I can't even trust my own decisions? And I leaned forward. It's like, what if I told you you're asking the wrong question? And he's looking at me confused. What do you mean? When you say, I don't trust myself, You're treating yourself as a monolith, one unified entity that's either trustworthy or not, black or white, all or nothing. This is the thinking of someone with addictive patterns, but that's not how our psyche actually works. The real question isn't, can I trust myself? It's which parts of me Am I struggling to trust and why? That's the reframe that changes the direction and helps you begin the process of self-trust.
