Dallas Bragg argues that recovery from addiction requires recognizing personal boundaries, which many people can't do because they're disconnected from their own feelings. For many gay men, crystal meth use numbs chronic pain caused by self-abandonment, a survival strategy from childhood that becomes destructive in adulthood.
You cannot have recovery, real deep lasting recovery, without learning to honor your boundaries. And you cannot honor boundaries you don't even know you have because you're so disconnected from your feelings. Crystal meth was never really about the high. It was about escaping the unbearable pain of chronic self-abandonment. It was about numbing the constant internal scream that happens when you violate yourself over and over and over. Every gay man I work with has spent decades perfecting that art of self-betrayal. Had to. You alive, kept you connected to your family. It helped you survive from being ridiculed. But what kept you alive as a kid is killing you as an adult.
