1 Kings 11:2-3 // Summer of Scripture

Welcome to Summer of Scripture on the Naked marriage podcast. For 66 days in a row, we are releasing a daily devotional episode for your marriage. And over these 66 days, we're going to pull out one scripture from each of the 66 books of the Bible and talk about how it applies to your marriage. So if you listen to every single one of these episodes, you're going to have a comprehensive understanding of God's plan for your marriage. We encourage you to listen to everyone. Let's dive into today's scripture. Welcome to day 11. We are in First Kings, and yesterday we referenced King Solomon, who did an awful lot of good in his life building the temple, writing the wisdom literature, like proverbs in the Bible. But Solomon also made a lot of mistakes and including that he disregarded God's plan for marriage. And we're going to hear more about that in today's verses, which is 1 Kings, chapter 11, verses 2 and 3. The Lord had clearly instructed the people of Israel, you must not marry them because they will turn your hearts to their gods. Yet Solomon insisted on loving them anyway. He had 700 wives of royal birth and 300 concubines. And in fact, they did turn his heart away from the Lord. So in Solomon, we see that he gave in to his desire, his flesh. He disregarded God's desire, which is first, not only just marry one person, but make sure there's somebody who loves the Lord. He chose to go after ladies who didn't know the Lord, you know, so they turned his heart because they had different religious beliefs, different gods. And so the combination of that of being with people who were pursuing other gods and then disregarding God's plan for monogamy and just having instead this insatiable desire for more and more sex, it really was making a mockery of God's plan for marriage. It created so much turmoil. And this passage and really this book in the life of Solomon, for all the good that he did. It's also a cautionary tale about making sure we're never getting to a point where we feel like God's rules and laws don't apply to us and we can do whatever we want as regards to sex and marriage.

It's so true. And later on, we see where Solomon lands and how miserable he is. And a lot of it is just the natural consequences of going outside of God's will, especially when it comes to marriage and sex. Because, man, I mean, I think sometimes we go into stuff thinking, oh, we're going to be the exception to the Rule of the natural consequences that are in place. And I think Solomon, because he was so wealthy, I mean, the wealthiest man ever at that time, and he did have so much wisdom in many other areas of his life. He also had pride, okay? He had a lot of pride over these things that God had given him and blessed him with. And that pride, ultimately. And also clearly, like, was a sex addict. I mean, he was like one of the first recorded sex addicts, probably, honestly, with how he approached life. But. But he just. He just ignored that there were these natural consequences. And.

And.

And in the process hurt a lot of people, including these people that he was involved with. And then the children that came out of this. The many, many, many children that came out of this. And so. And there's a lot we don't even know about the wreckage that happened. But, you know, it. It's just. I think that so many times we need to remember that there's consequences to our actions. But when it specifically comes to sex, guys, I think that, you know, you can look at this story and say, well, I'm not being like, Solomon. It's not like I'm sleeping around. I'm not like, I don't have multiple partners. I haven't cheated on my wife. I haven't cheated on my hu. Think we do this in other subtle ways. And I think today the biggest thing that we are fighting when it comes to this is pornography. I think pornography is the mistress and the Mr. For. Is that what you call, like, the male equivalent to the mistress? I'm going to call it mister.

Your mister don't have a mister.

You're mister. I mean, to me it sounds like that's what it would be, but to.

Me, I picture like, something squirting in the mist of like. Like a Beth Bed, Bath and Beyond. Like a mistpoury.

Oh, like with essential oils or whatever. Yes. Um, but no, like, I think of like, a mister and a mistress. And like these people who you're using, I mean, you're virtually using them, okay, to fulfill your sexual needs. And you're telling yourself and believing the lie from the enemy, that you're believing this lie, that it's not hurting anyone. I'm just meeting my needs because my spouse isn't doing what I really want them to do, or they don't have the desire for frequency that I have or whatever it is. And it's not hurting anybody because I'm not actually bringing them physically into my bedroom. I'm not actually cheating. But you guys, again, Jesus himself raised the standard of adultery and said to look at a woman, to look at a man with lust is the same as committing adultery with him and her. And so we can't do that. Pornography is just asking to fulfill your desire for lust and then essentially trying to fulfill your own sexual needs through things like masturbation. And so we just need to really be aware of this and call it what it is. You know, pornography is sin. And I think even if you're. You're listening to me and watching me right now and saying, well, I'm not necessarily like into porn, but, you know, I mean, I read these, you know, erotica novels, same thing. It's just written porn. Okay. And they neuroscience says it does the same exact thing to a woman's brain. And all of our getting all of our fires going, so to speak, as it does for a man watching a piranha.

Or I watch certain things on HBO or even Netflix that, that I know.

Are going to be toe the line.

TV ma and have gratuitous steamy scenes and extra nudity and all that. But it's just entertainment. It's art. But it, it create or I'm going to follow certain accounts on Instagram of people that are, that are basically naked all the time because it's a fitness account. And I'm just, I'm into the fitness accounts. But you know that what you're really doing is allowing yourself to lust in an environment that you feel safe with that lust.

Yeah.

And anytime again, we're doing what's just right in our own eyes instead of following God's standard for purity, for sex, for marriage, for. For mindfulness about what we should do, even with our own thoughts, not taking our thoughts captive as the Bible tells us to. We're setting ourselves up for just damaging results. And yeah, maybe we can feel good about ourselves by again, comparison saying, well, at least I'm not doing this. At least I'm not having an affair. I haven't had a thousand partners like Solomon or whatever else. But that shouldn't be our standard. Our standard should be Christ himself who was without sin. And our standard should be in scripture where it says we should not have even a hint of sexual immorality. And we all fall short of that. And Jesus is there to offer grace. But when we are flagrantly disrespectful of God's standards, it always causes pain. Guys, everything God tells us to do is for our protection. It's like the guardrails on the interstate. It's from keeping you from going into the wrong lane of traffic, hurting yourself and hurting other people. It's not there to limit you, it's there to protect you.

It is. And you guys, we're not saying this at you. We're saying this as, as ones who struggle as well. I mean, we shared our, our own struggles with you guys. The Naked Marriage podcast where Dave had, you know, dealt with porn in the past, had a porn addiction at one point, had to come through that, get clean of that, had relapses with that. I mean, it's a messy journey, but he's been free from porn for many years. I've shared how there's been times I've looked too long at these gratuitous scenes where I'm like thinking I'm in a fast forward. But you get caught up in it. Like our eyes get caught up in it. You know, And I talk to so many women where they feel like they're addicted to erotica novels. And the reason they're addicted is because it is. It's a sexual fulfillment thing. I mean, and I think we just need to call it what it is. So I'm not saying this to you to be judgmental. I'm saying this to you as a sister in Christ who also is trying to walk this road of freedom in Christ. And we don't want to get caught up in these snares that the enemy wants to just hold us down and put us in this kind of chamber of shame where we feel like we can't let our spouse know about our struggle and we can't really talk to anybody and get help because, oh my goodness, I'm supposed to be this Christian. How could I fall into this? But that's a lie from the enemy. We have to call it sin and then get the help that we need. And you guys, there is no struggle you're going through that somebody else can't relate to, that there's not some kind of help out there for. And so don't believe that lie, but get the help. Don't keep on allowing yourself to stay in this, this muck that you're dealing with and feeling ashamed of yourself and then ultimately holding yourself from having a great sex life with your spouse. You know, we go into great deal deal about this, great detail about this in our book the Counterfeit Climax. You can go back and listen to episodes about that. But honestly, if you want to have the full picture of how to have the freedom that God wants us to have in the marital bedroom and to really enjoy sex and not feel held back from our. Our maybe bad sexual history or past and past hurts. Whatever it is, read the counterfeit climax. Go through the questions together. I'm telling you, it will help you have just such a breakthrough in your relationship. But it takes. It takes, you know, making that effort. I think sometimes we just get on this autopilot and squish it down and not address it. But we need to actually talk about it.

So good guys have those conversations. It might be uncomfortable, but it is. It's the key to breakthrough into healing. Thanks so much for tuning in today. We look forward to seeing you tomorrow. For day two, 12 will be in the book of second kings.