Your Best Year of Health with Israel and Hollie Bernal | Dave and Ashley Willis

Hello, and welcome back to the Naked Marriage Podcast. We are Dave and Ashley Willis, and on this podcast, we address the truth about sex, intimacy, and lifelong love. And you guys, we are so excited. We have some of our dear friends. They are just awesome, and I cannot wait for you guys to meet them and hear from them. And Dave is going to tell you all about them.

That's right. Israel and Holly Bernal. We, we are thrilled to call them our friends. They're two of not only the most fun people that we know, but two of the healthiest people that we know. And they're going to some wonderful insights about just a lifestyle of health with busy lives like they have of raising kids and all the things that they do of still finding a way to live with such health. And I think that it'll challenge all of us and encourage us who are trying to start out 2023 with the healthiest year that it can possibly be. Plus, we're going to have a lot of fun in this conversation, so let's dive in. Well, like I said in the intro, I am so excited about our guests today. Israel and Holly Bernal, some of our dearest friends, just wonderful, wonderful folks, and also two of the healthiest people that I know. So when we were like, we're gonna have an interview, talking to somebody who can help inspire couples out there who want this to be their healthiest year ever. Who should we get? And I'm like, well, who are our buffest friends? It's Israel and Holly Bernal. And watching you guys just, you do health in so many areas of life. You guys just, you're disciplined, your health, your mindset, you're just great to be around. But specifically with the journey of your physical health, you guys are just two of the most disciplined people that I know, and you really have made a lifestyle out of it that's really helping you live your best life. And a lot of folks that are listening right now are watching on YouTube, they want that, but maybe they don't know how to get started, right? Or maybe one of them wants it more than the other. And so I want to talk to you about that, but before we get there, let's rewind the clock and just tell us how you met. How did this epic love story begin?

Well, I'll kind of give you the intro on that. I first met her, saw her at church.

Good place to meet.

Yes, it is. And I'm not going to lie, I was looking for my wife at church, and I saw her, and she caught my eye, obviously. How Beautiful. She is. And I saw her and I introduced myself to her. And at the time, she had a boyfriend. And so anyway, it was a good introduction. And then gradually that boyfriend disappeared because God wanted me in her life, and so he was gone. And then I approached her one day after church and I started talking to her and then got her phone number. And then one thing led to another, and here we are 16 years later, over 16 years later, and you took.

Me on a date every single year. Single night, yes.

Yeah. Yeah.

So we fast forward dating. Like we just did it really quickly.

Yeah, we dated. We dated every night. When we dated, we were, we were, we were together every night. So that, that really helped us really form a bond and, and fall in love rather quickly. And so, yeah, I believe we both know it was a God ordained divine appointment. And so that's, that, that's, that's most of the story.

Well, and even today, seeing how you guys prioritize, date night is beautiful. You make it a priority. Even though you're amazing present parents with your four awesome kids, you make that date night and that time together so important. And I think that's just something.

We don't date every night now, though.

Not every night.

Well, we do date every night. Every day's a date, but every Friday.

Night'S a date night.

But we do have a Friday night. We used to have two nights a week. Now we have one night. But date night is, is, is prioritized from day one, obviously. But even after marriage and as we were having babies, like you said, we have four children. As we were having babies, that didn't stop us from dating. Yeah, we were in the back of the restaurant with her nursing the baby, and we were on a date and we still spent quality time together. And that's such a huge priority. I mean, you guys obviously emphasize that, and I can't tell you how important that is for couples that are out there listening. Don't ever stop dating your wife. You, you can't stop dating your wife. Never. Never. Absolutely.

That is so important. It's how you stay connected.

Oh, absolutely.

And I love that you all, you know, you're living that out all the time, you know, having your prioritizing, your date nights. But also I feel like you guys, you've, you've been. Ever since I've known you, which I think I've known you now for like four or five years, but ever since I've known you, you've always been healthy. But the last like two years, you got even more serious about Your health journey. And I'd love to hear kind of what inspired that and kind of what got you on that journey.

Sure. So, you know, for me, I've always been in the gym for. For a longest time. And so I was always real consistent with the gym, the nutrition, probably not as much, but the gym was pretty consistent. And so, you know, when we started dating, Holly had. Holly was working out, too. She was in the gym. And then I, I trained her some, too, as we were dating. I would train her, and I trained her some when we were married. But then you're right, probably the last, I would say three, three years or so, we've really, you know, she became vegan. And this isn't us trying to promote the vegan issue, but she became vegan probably about four years ago. And then for me to support her, I became vegan probably three and a half years ago. So after she was vegan for a while, I wanted to jump on board to help support her through the vegan part. And then once we went vegan, we noticed a lot of different changes with the health situation. We were always healthy, but like you said, it took it up another notch. And so then we went from that when we dealt more into the nutrition part of it, and we got into doing what's called your macros, which is your carbohydrates, your protein and your fats. So we started doing our macros and we started meal planning and prepping. And that just elevated everything to a whole other level, because then, you know, you're burning. It's a scientific way that that's proven to burn fat and build muscle at the same time. So you're, you're losing fat, you're gaining muscle, and your hormones, your levels, your blood work, everything is, is at an optimum level. And so with the macros being dialed in, that just took. That just elevated us to another level. And so that, that's what you saw the difference in starting to track our macros, starting to do more meal planning and that. And, you know, it's always been a lifestyle for us as far as, you know, being in the gym and trying to eat as healthy as we could early on. But then as you start to get older and you know God's going to bless you with age, you need to take advantage of that because health is wealth, and so you have to be able to live. We always talk about wanting to live a quality of life, you know, because, you know, you can live to be 80, 90, whatever it is, but if that quality of life Isn't there? It's not much of a lifestyle for me. And so we were very intrigued with the macros and so that's what helped us elevate it to another level.

And it's being a good steward of the body that God gave us.

Oh, absolutely.

Just saying. God, you give me this one body to live in and I want to be here as long as you want me here. And to have, like you said, the quality of life. And having eaten with you guys, you know, I think I would have had, I would have had the mindset though that like, oh man, eating like that is going to taste nasty. It's going to taste like cardboard, but it's delicious. You guys have really your meal planning, your meal prep, the way that you eat. So tell us a little bit about what food looks like for you and what are some of your favorite things to eat as part of this lifestyle plan.

Well, pizza has always been my favorite, but beet burgers, I mean, I eat more of a variety now than I ever did before I was vegan. People think if you eat plant based or whatever, all you're eating is broccoli and carrots.

Right?

It's totally opposite. But my background with fitness, you know, I've always been intrigued with working out and taking care of my body. But I tried. I've always had a problem with my weight growing up. Not terrible, but just not where I would want it to be. And I tried every diet, like from Keto to, you name it, I tried it. And it was just like running in circles and spinning my wheels. And I'm like, this is so frustrating. But then I invited God into it. I prayed, I was like, God, what should I eat from my body type? Because every body's different.

Yes.

Whatever works for me might not work for somebody else. God, what should I do? And I really believe that he led me to plant based. It's not for everyone, but it's what worked the best for me. And I mean, five years ago, mid-30s, I would wake up, my feet would hit the floor, I'd have like these aches and pains everywhere. Just thought that's normal. I might be just aging. I had digestive issues. I had, I don't know, just. I just wasn't feeling great. So the minute I tried the plant based or the next day, my feet hit the floor, like no aches. Like immediately my digestion issues went away. I'll save you all the gross details on that. But it was just like, oh my gosh. And then ever since then, we Keep down. We're never, you know, we've never arrived. We keep learning like what's best for us, for our bodies. And God and I didn't really have, I've never been a disciplined person. Like he has been. Like he was out of the womb. Carlene Dunbel.

I can picture that, like doing one arm push ups with a diaper on.

But I just asked God to give me a desire to take care of my body, give me a desire to give me discipline just to work out. And it's, it, I mean, the key is just inviting God into your health and fitness because he does care, he does want you to be healthy.

Absolutely.

I love that. And I, like Dave said, we've seen you all eat and actually we've been tasting. We've had it. I was gonna say amazing. It is so good. Like, one of my favorite things to have with you guys is it's a cauliflower pizza. Am I saying that right? And then there's some, there was some kind of vegan meat.

Seitan.

Yeah, seitan. I was gonna say it wrong. I know, I'm glad you said that.

Not Satan.

Not Satan. Seitan. It's just delicious. I think, I do think that sometimes we just need to change our mindset around food because. And in talking with you guys, I think kind of one of the issues with people is the assumptions we make. Like, first of all, like, well, that's just not tasty. I can't do that. I can't keep that up about things like veganism. But really just not, you know, really kind of getting out of, I don't know, the American diet. Because really the American diet in general is just not healthy like the general American diet. And so, and it is hard sometimes to go against the grain. But I do see, and I wanted to ask if you guys see this, I do see kind of the pendulum swinging more in the health direction and there's there being more restaurants and places where you can get good vegan meals and you can get healthier everywhere.

Now, yes, if you're looking for it.

Right. But you do have to look for it, I think, you know, and.

Yeah.

And break away from those assumptions. I think like men think, well, I'm going to be weak if I don't eat a ton of meat. And I'm saying, look at Israel. You need to watch Built Like a Brick House. They're both strong, but like with just the protein thing for people, they're thinking like, okay, well, where am I going to get my protein if I cut back on meat or maybe do that all together. What are your main protein sources?

We use protein, I would say tofu, seitan protein powder, but it's vegan protein powder. So it's rice protein, pea protein and hemp protein.

Okay.

Yeah.

So it's all, it's all natural proteins. And you know, you'd be surprised. Like broccoli, per, per gram or per serving has more. Per calorie. Per serving has more protein than beef.

Does it?

And so, yeah, so, I mean, there's a lot of variables there that people don't understand. Because I remember a few years ago when I started doing plant based and going vegan and people that knew me before, they're like, oh my gosh, you're going to shrivel up. Where are you going to get your protein? And I'll tell you, you know, I'm, I'm the fittest that I've ever been. And obviously because of the Mac, because of the fat, you know, we, we like to build lean muscle mass. We like to be really, really lean. And, and we're not, we're very, we're not, we're all natural. But I think there is a misconception, like you're saying now, and I will tell you guys that are listening out there that, oh, we love meat. We're not going to. There's nothing wrong with eating lean meats. You know, I'll just say that lean meats, lean fishes. But where you need to be careful is your fats. And also, you know, carbs, carbs and proteins. I eat more carbs. We eat more carbs than we do proteins. So our carbs are here, proteins here, and then our fats are way down here. So the carbs are not all created equal. You know, a lot of people have that misconception with all these diets and all these fads that are going on and saying, oh, no, no, eat more prote. And carbs. And carbs are bad for you. No, not all carbs are bad for you. Processed, Processed carbs.

Nobody's ever died from protein deficiency. Like, it's just not a thing. People think that you need all this protein, but really you need fiber.

Yes. Fiber is probably the most important thing because you want to be able to release those toxins from your body as fast as you can.

What about like, when, like, Ashley hates for me to have fiber, it creates this gas.

Yes.

She's like, I would rather you just have fiber deficiency. And yeah. And I was like, you know, fiber is hurting our marriage. I need to get more natural Sources of fiber.

Yes, yes, fiber is a good thing. It doesn't always smell great, but. And vegan fiber is really bad. So, I mean, I mean, as far as the smell goes, right. But it's healthy, Very healthy. But fiber, like she said, fiber is one of the most important things you got to put in your body because you do want to release. You want to release those toxins as quickly as possible and get it out of your system. So that's very important. But carbohydrates are something that I think have had a bad rap because people aren't necessarily adding carbohydrates the way they're supposed to. People think carbs are breads and pastas and all, and they are, but you don't want to incorporate that. You want to incorporate the good carbon. You want to do jasmine rice. You want to do There's Dave's Killer. And I'm not trying to plug these guys. I'm just telling you there's all these other good sources of carbs that are good for you and that are healthy. It's just. I think it's more neat things just being educated. And like she said, we're constantly evolving and we're constantly learning. And we don't claim to be nutritionist or any of that stuff, but we've learned from nutritionists and we, we practice what we preach daily. So we've, we understand and we've learned our bodies now.

Well, that's why I wanted. And we have the blueprint, guys, is because we could have had, you know, like a nutritionist or some bit like you guys are real people living real lives, and you're, you're finding a way to live. Live healthy and making it work with the busy lifestyle, with raising kids, with doing other things. And you don't like, own. Own a gym where you're. The gym all day. You don't, you're not nutritionist where you're, you're constantly just thinking about that, but you've, You've done the work. But for people that feel overwhelmed, they don't know where to start. I think sometimes what holds people back is they want to get healthier, but they don't know where to start. Like, you know, Doritos is just all they've ever eaten, and you're talking about totally changing that. And they're like, I mean, I don't know where to start. Like, with meal planning and all that. What would you say to that person that wants to get healthy? They want to start taking steps in that direction. But maybe the thought of, like, of the kind of the discipline that you guys have seems so far off that they're like, I'd love to get there someday, but what are some baby steps I can take right now where I am, like, where I'm. I may be really overweight? You know, I have not been active. You know, health. It's like I feel defeated as soon as I start because I've had a lot of times where I've tried a diet and it hasn't worked. And like, you guys have said diets don't work because you need a lifestyle. But what are some of those first steps for that person that's out there? And they're like, I just. I don't know how to eat. I don't know where to start. I've always been overweight, but I want to do something. I want this to be the year that it's not just a resolution, that I really have a different lifestyle. What are some of those first habits, those first things that you would say, start doing this and stop doing this?

I'd say the first thing to echo what my wife said. Invite God number one. God can help you get there. First of all, you have to have. First of all, we believe this foremost, before anything is the foundation you have in God. He can adjust, and any obstacles, he can remove them from you, and he can guide you. First and foremost, you have to invite God in, and it has to be a desire. Like she said, she wanted that desire and she wanted something different. And she invited God to help her with those steps. And then after that, I preach this, and those of you that know me out there, I preach nutrition above working out all the time because people are like, oh, my gosh, you spend hours in the. No, no, no, no. It's 80, 20 or 90, 10. Nutrition.

People have confused, made it difficult. It's really simple. God made foods. Whatever is grown from God is the best food. Anything man made, like processed in a package. Doritos. It's kind of obvious, you know, but some. But our culture, I mean, they're constantly saying, this is good for you. This is heart healthy on chips, you know? So people can get confused in our culture, but just go back to the basics of what God has made for you to eat. The Garden of Eden, you know, everything that we needed was grown there.

So Little Debbie is not an angel.

No.

I mean, it tastes from heaven, but.

Yeah, for a little while. But then afterwards you're like, oh, my God. Yeah.

The way you feel afterwards is not heaven.

What have you Done to me, yeah, it's not sustainable. Like you said, the diets and the fads are not sustainable. I would encourage people to. I mean, you can Google macros, you can Google nutrition food, you can Google, you know, proteins and good carbs, good protein. I mean, there's so much information out there now with technology that you can. And you can hire. I mean, you know, some of those, you guys that are really willing and said, you know what? This is it, I'm ready to go hire a nutrition coach. I mean, call these people up, they'll make a meal plan out for you. I mean, they're out there. It's that. And once you start seeing the change, not only seeing the changes, not from a vanity standpoint, but more than anything from a healthy standpoint, when you start feeling, like she said, amazing everything. Oh, absolutely. You'll never want to go back because your hormones and your. I mean, not just for women, but for men, every. Your hormone levels, your blood work, everything is on an optimal. Because we believe in health. We're not in this for vanity purposes. I mean, to me, that's kind of like icing on the cake because we get to enjoy the way you can build a physique from that. But more than anything, we love seeing our blood work. We love seeing our blood work at its optimum level. And that to us is more important because that's really health.

What's on the inside.

Absolutely. Our organs and everything. That's what we're striving for, that. Because with. And that's what we notice too, when we know about being vegan. And I'm not there again, I'm not trying to push veganism on anybody, but it deteriorates the other products out there that are dairy and all these other products causes inflammation. And there's so many things that people suffer from inflammation within their organs and within their bodies that once you start to remove a lot of these things, you know, guys, prostates, you know, women's, you know, so many things. And, and breast cancer. And I'm not. We're not doctors. We're not doctors, we're not nutritionists, but we've seen the, the ramifications of that and we understand what can happen and what it can cause. And so I would just say, you know, use. Use as much technology as you can. And also, I mean, guys that are out there, you know, contact you guys, and we'll. We'll be glad to answer some questions for them and give them some information and, and help them because we love what it does from a healthy standpoint. Like you said, we have four children at home, and so we're constantly involved with them, with activities, and we do so many things. We do everything together as a family. And plus, you know, hey, the Naked Marriage Podcast.

Thanks for the plug.

Yes, the Naked Marriage Podcast. What better way to stay naked than to be healthy? You know, and so, you know, it's a great environment to create with your spouse because, you know, it just, it elevates every level of being intimate, too. And so that's such a great connection to continue to have. And when you're in love, you know, with your soulmate and your best friend, I mean, there's no substitute for that. And when you, when you're healthy, not only that, but you have such a clarity, you know, A clarity. And when you're firing in all cylinders, it's just an amazing feeling, you know, I don't want to keep talking.

Yeah, we're not passionate about this at all.

It's fine.

I love it.

No, well, I'll let my wife chime in because she's. She's so eloquent too, with what she says. I mean, she, she really. And she's gotten, she's experienced this as well. So I'll let you chime in as well.

Well, I don't even remember what the question was.

Well, I'll ask you what steps.

Okay, go ahead.

Yeah, like, benefit wise, like, we were talking about the steps, and I think you guys, you know, covered that especially. I love how you talked about reaching out to professionals. Like, I mean, that, that's so true. I think times we make it harder on ourselves because we try to just figure it out. And there are, I mean, like you said, you can Google, you can learn a lot, but sometimes it does take that professional step. And I love that you mentioned that. But I wanted to ask. You guys have talked about kind of the difference, like some of the improvements, and I would love to hear kind of. And I mean, I know some of these things, but I love our audience to hear about just the different improvements you've experienced, not only personally, but also in your marriage, kind of, since you've made this big change.

Hmm.

Well, growing up in the American culture, you and I both know it's brutal on women, the vanity, to look a certain way. And I mean, full transparency here. I worked out for vanity reasons for the longest time, not really realizing it, but I was just going through the motions because I was listening to the world, you know, their workouts, to get a smaller waist or it Was all about the inches. And the number on the scale would determine my happiness for the day. Like, it was. It's a trap. And so once I invited God into it, he literally set me free from all that. I don't weigh myself anymore. I don't care what my waist is. I don't care. He gave me the desire to be strong and healthy. And, like, it's so liberating to be free from what the culture and the world says, what health and fitness should be. Yeah, it's so liberating. And so I feel that in our marriage, too. And I'm con.

It.

It just. It raises my confidence. It's godly confidence. It's not worldly confidence.

Yes.

Anymore. And only God can do that.

That's amazing. I love that. And, you know, I know some people watching and listening are like, you don't weigh yourself. I mean, that just seems like, what?

Bizarre.

Well, how do you even know? But I. I am so glad to hear you say that, because I do think that really, the goal is not a number on the scale. And, you know, truth be told, those are gonna ebb and flow. Like, I mean, after having. We've both had four children, I mean, goodness, we've had, you know, different scales. You know, we've had different weights at different times, and. And our bodies have gone through so many changes. And I think, you know, I'm in my 40s now, and I will. I will tell you, I think there's some wisdom that comes with age. And, you know, and I. I know for me personally, I. I do have more of a goal of just being strong. Like, I. I want to be strong. I want to. I don't want to have aches and pains like, when we shift it. And it's more like, I want to live long. I want to be able to be there for my children and my husband and live all those experiences with them. And this is within my control, you know, because there's some things we can't control, but this is one aspect that we can. And, you know, and I think. I think being able to make those choices, and especially for women, flipping that kind of perspective, it is empowering. And I think. I even think that. I've heard, you know, women talk about not weighing for a whole year and ending up actually, like, when they go to the doctor, they find out they actually did lose weight, but they weren't even trying to. They were just living healthy.

Right?

And so I think that's such a good perspective to have so much wisdom.

You guys have Shared so much. I'm going to. In just a second to close, I want each of you to share one nugget of marriage advice. And it doesn't have to do. It can do with health, but it doesn't have to at all. Just one little final nugget for our listeners and our viewers. But I do want to thank you guys again. And Holly, I want to wish you a happy birthday. Entering a new decade. We pray this is your best, best decade yet in every aspect of your life.

Thank you.

And you two really have been such a gift to us. And you've just, we just, you know, we love you. We just love you both so much.

And we love you guys.

Thank you.

You guys are awesome.

Thank you. And before we wrap up, what's one nugget? One. Who wants to go first?

I'll go first. I'll let her take her time to think. I mean, there's so many nuggets I could give you.

I know. Gosh.

But I would say prioritize your spouse. I mean, you know, she's my best friend. She's my soulmate. She's, you know, she's what God had stored and planned for me. And, you know, you never stop dating each other. Never. You know, there's. We still, I still get. And she tells me she does, too. So I mean, I still get butterflies when we're, when it's date night and I know it's date night and, you know, I'm still excited and I get all, you know, ready and I'm just, we're so excited for date night and for, you know, spending quality time together. And we spend so much time together and so much quality time and. And, you know, you have to learn to, you know, like God says we are to be of the world, but not in the world. You know, he doesn't want us to partake in the worldly things. And so I think the world has a different view of marriage and so much, so much divorce out there and so many lies from the enemy that it takes away and it distracts from what's priority. You know, obviously God's our number one priority, but then after God, it's my spouse.

Yeah.

And so we want to walk in that because we have a covenant that is so special to us that we took vows and, you know, we have. God has blessed us with the covenant and we want to honor that. But more than anything, I want to honor her. I mean, and guys, I will tell you this. Here's one beautiful nugget. Wash your wife's feet. Wash your wife's feet and just get home, you know, one day and just, you know, surprise her. Surprise her, have everything ready or whatever, and then just wash her feet. And, you know, that's one of the most beautiful things you can do for your wife.

That's beautiful.

Biblical, too.

Yes, absolutely.

Yeah.

Or in Ashley's case, she loves it also, in addition to that, to rub her feet every night.

You can rub her feet after you wash them, then lotion them up and rub them and then who knows what that leaves. Stupid.

Exactly.

All right.

I don't think mine will be as long, but I'm sorry. From a personal experience, just learn to communicate. Yes. If you're a good communicator, marriage will be so much better and so much easier to get through arguments or whatever it is. Just be. If you're not a good communicator, learn to be one.

Yes.

It's so wise.

I mean, definitely.

We just say that all the time, you know, that almost every marriage issue really, at the core, is a communication, somebody not really communicating. And it's great advice.

What's so interesting is a lot of times you want the same thing, but you have. You're not able to even let each other know that because the communication's so off. You know what I'm saying? And that is gold. And I feel like, you know, we say this all the time on the podcast, but if you do have trouble communicating, if that's a struggle for you, definitely talk to one of our ExoMarriage mediators@exomarriage.com help. They're excellent. We talk about it all the time, but we can't talk about it enough because they can really be a great guide.

They really can. And I hope today's episode's encouraged you. I know that it's encouraged and challenged us as our dear friends always encourage us, but if you've got somebody in your life, a friend, a relative, and maybe they've talked about trying to get healthier and maybe just need some encouragement and some next steps, share this episode with them. I think this conversation would be a great place to start. And the Bernal's have provided some wonderful next steps. And Israel, Holly, thank you again. We love you guys.

Thanks for having us. Thanks for having us. It was a pleasure.