They love you, they just don’t know how to love you in a healthy way

23 Oct 2026 · 1 min

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In this reflective YouTube monologue, Emily McDonald discusses how some people genuinely love you but express that love in unhealthy, toxic ways. She describes her personal shift from seeking validation from such relationships to consciously choosing partners who can love her healthily, while still holding space for the possibility of growth in others. By sharing her experience with a friend who has a strained relationship with her parents, Emily illustrates how recognizing that love can be mis‑expressed helps others stop equating another person's ability to show love with their own self‑worth. The core message encourages viewers to prioritize their well‑being, set boundaries, and understand that a loved one's flawed love style does not diminish their value.

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TranscriptAuto-generated · 1 min

They love you. They just don't know how to love you in a healthy way. And so it went from me like striving for their love to actually it becoming a choice. Like, do I wanna be in a relationship with this person that is only going to ever be able to love me in a toxic way? Or do I wanna choose better for myself and hope that one day they heal and learn and I'll be here if they do? But that, that changed everything for me. And I remember I shared it with one of my good friends and she has an estranged relationship with her parents. And I shared my story with her and she was like, wow, that like helps me so much because she's like, yeah, like I feel like my parents don't love me, but they do love me. They just, this is how they know how to show love and it's not necessarily how I wanna receive it. So stop making another person's capacity to show love a reflection of your worth.

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