Your Kid's Biggest Fear (And Why Your Advice Backfires)

25 Aug 2026 · 2 min

Watch on YouTube

1:37

In this concise coaching video, Evan Sanchez—founder of New Grad Launchpad—identifies the core anxiety that many adult children face: the fear of disappointing their parents. He explains that this fear often persists throughout their 20s and 30s and can shape their life choices. Rather than offering job listings or unsolicited advice, Sanchez recommends three specific, unconditional phrases parents should use to alleviate this fear: (1) “I’m proud of you,” with concrete details; (2) “I love you all the time, no matter what,” emphasizing unconditional love; and (3) “I believe in you.” He argues that consistently hearing these affirmations helps adult children feel less pressured to meet parental expectations. The video concludes with a call to follow him for more guidance.

Chapters

Okay. So here is the biggest fear any college grad who's stuck at home has. For those of you who don't know me, my name is Evan Sanchez. I'm the founder of New Grad Launchpad, and I help parents of adult children get unstuck. So there's this fear that every kid has, and it's especially pronounced in their 20s and their 30s. And sometimes it can go on their entire life. But the fear, the biggest fear they have is disappointing you. Their biggest fear is disappointing their parents. Think about that. Was that true for you? Or maybe it's still true. A lot of kids have this fear. So when you have that backdrop of they're afraid of disappointing you, how are you going to show up differently? Are you going to give them job listings? Are you going to give them unsolicited advice? No. Here are 3 simple phrases you can use. One, I'm proud of you, and be specific about what you're proud of them for. Number 2, I love you all the time, no matter what. Unconditional love. Even when you say I love you, they may still feel like it's conditional. So if you say I love you all the time, no matter what, That eliminates the conditions. And number 3, I believe in you. They need to hear these phrases because again, the backdrop of everything is that they're afraid of disappointing you. So I hope this video was helpful, and follow me for more.