Ashley ChandlerFounder + CEO, The Teenage Guide · Founder and CEO, The Teenage Guide | Parent and Teen Coach

Conflict is information

5 Jul 2026 · 1 min

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Ashley Chandler explains how unresolved family conflict becomes a story kids tell themselves about who they are. When parents feel unheard, they internalize that they're unlovable, then pass that belief to their teens, who start seeing themselves as the problem and fundamentally misunderstood.

Chapters

When we stay stuck in struggle and conflict and a challenge, we start to make that challenge or that dynamic or that experience or that circumstance mean something long-term about us. Parents can start telling themselves, they don't care, they don't wanna connect with me, they're not even trying. And then we reflect that on our teens. Teens can start telling themselves, I'm the problem, nothing I do is right, nobody gets me, they only notice what's wrong. Those stories, those narratives, they They shape everything.