Greg Faxon argues that high expectations — especially comparisons to past performance, to others, or to imagined futures — are a primary driver of frustration and burnout, often more so than overwork. He uses a personal climbing-gym anecdote to show how adjusting expectations (rather than blaming yourself) reduces frustration, and advises viewers to notice and challenge expectations when they arise. The video ends with a call-to-action to watch a related video about not always loving your business.
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I used to think that high expectations were a good thing, that they motivated me to work harder. But now I think the opposite might be true. Almost any time I feel frustrated and want to quit, it's because of an expectation. For example, I recently went to a climbing gym in Utah, and the grades were way harder there than in my gym in Vermont. So a V7 in Vermont was like a V4 at this new gym in Utah. When I started struggling with grades that would have been easy for me back home, I started to get frustrated at myself. I was like, wow, I obviously suck at climbing. I almost left the gym early. But when I realized the grading system was just harder at the Utah gym, I was able to adjust my expectations. The problem wasn't me. It was my expectations. Expectations take root when you compare reality to past performance. Like thinking I should make at least as much as I made last year. Or when you compare yourself to other people. Like, he or she is so disciplined. Why can't I be like that? Or number three, expectations take root when you compare yourself to some imagined future. Like, I thought I would be further ahead by now. I think high expectations are actually a bigger cause of burnout than overwork. You can only stay in the discomfort of being here and thinking you should be there for so long before you quit. By bringing awareness to these expectations, you can challenge them. You can say to yourself, obviously, I had the wrong expectation, because look at what's happening in reality. So next time you catch yourself feeling frustrated, look for the expectation. You'll have more energy to work with when you're not fighting against reality. If you like this idea, I made a related video about why you don't always have to love your business. So go check that out now.
