147. Innovative Ways to Learn English with Ethan from ReaLife English

Welcome to the Influency Podcast. I'm Hadar and this is episode number 147. And today I'm interviewing my friend Ethan from RealLife English who is going to talk to you about innovative ways to learn and practice English.

Hey, everyone.

Welcome back.

Thank you so much for tuning, tuning.

In for another episode. I'm really excited about sharing today's episode. It's a recording from the live English show where I interviewed Ethan from RealLife English and English with TV series. If you don't know those YouTube channels, you should definitely check them out. I'm going to link to them in the description below because they are so incredibly helpful for English learners. Some of the things that we talked about are how to identify your motivation for learning. We talked about how to define fluency. We talked about building strong learning habits. You know, I love talking about habits. And we also talked about the question whether or not it's effective to practice with fellow English learners.

And this is really only a part.

Of what we have for you today. So I hope you enjoy this episode. Let's listen to my interview with Ethan.

Hi, Ethan. So good to have you here. So, Ethan, for those who don't know you, would you like to share a little bit more? You're not just an English coach and communicator. It's. You're also an English learner. You speak so many different languages and you're like a person of the, of the world. So would you like to just say a few words about yourself?

Sure, Yeah. I live in Barcelona for those that don't know. But I'm from the United States. I have a lot of people, they hear I live in Barcelona and they assume that I'm from here, but I'm not. English is my native language, so I'm, I'm very fortunate for that. But like all of you that are watching, I believe I love learning languages. I've learned six different languages in my life. I speak two or three of them. I would say, you know, reasonably well.

Okay, wait a minute. 6. I need to know the language. So I know English and Spanish, of course. What else?

Yeah, so Catalan, that's. That's the foreign language I use most in my day to day, which is a language spoken in Barcelona and Catalonia. And I also, well, I always have to think about it historically, have to go through, like, my life to count them up. So the first language I learned was German. And when I was in high school, I got to go live in Germany for six months. So I used to be fluent In German, but of course if you don't use it, you lose it. So I haven't really been so good about using my German and I can understand it still pretty well, but I'm not so good at speaking anymore. And after that, I studied abroad in Spain for the first time when I was in college. So that was the second language that I got to got fluent in. I lived in Brazil after college and so I got fluent Portuguese. At the time, while I was in Brazil, for some reason I decided I wanted to learn French and so I started learning that. I've never really gotten very fluent in French, but I can understand it pretty well and I really love the language. And then I moved to Barcelona. I learned Catalan here. And actually, because I think most people think like, they're thinking like, hey, you went to live all these places, so you were living there and that's why you learn them so well. But actually Catalan, the. The time I learned the best, I was living in Chile because it was after living in Barcelona and I wanted to not lose it and stuff. So I was just studying a lot and even though I didn't, you know, speak it in my everyday life, I just was so passionate about it that that was like the time that I. One of the times that I progressed the most with it. And. Wow.

So. Which actually kills the argument of if you don't live in that country, then you are, you know, you will never be able to speak that language fluently. So you're a proof that that's not true.

Totally. Yeah. I was just speaking too, to Ana from English Fluency Journey. And I mean, she's never even visited an English speaking country and she has this incredible level of English, I mean, much better than any foreign language that I speak. So I think that that's just. It's very impressive what you can do if you have the passion, if you set your mind to it, if you tie it to the things that you love doing, like if you like watching TV series, if you like reading, if you like playing sports and you watch videos about that in English, whatever's the case, if you are able to do that, then, you know, I think you can create your own immersion experience without going to live abroad.

Yeah, exactly. So I guess that this is one of the reasons that got you to start or to create learn English with TV series, because obviously you have figured out something there that resonated with so many learners. Do you mind talking about that for a little bit? Like what got you to start that channel and teach through TV series? In particular.

Yeah, it was actually just an experiment, really, to start out as we had created a course called Fluent with Friends. Because we. And when I say we, I mean my business partner Justin and Chad, who was working with us at the time. He doesn't work with us anymore, but we had just met so many people, you know, traveling and at that point, like, living in Brazil, that you would talk to them. They had this amazing English and be like, you know, how. How did you learn English? How did you get such great English? And they would say different things. But one thing that we heard from so many people is, like, I watched all 10 seasons of Friends in English, and we heard this enough times. We're like, you know, maybe there's. There's something kind of like two. This series that it's, like, really helping get this incredible English. Not only the English, too, but, like, tying to the culture. Never having been to the United States, but a lot about American culture. So.

Yeah, because the culture is really distinct there. Like, really. It's apparent in every single part of the show and the language that they use. And it's so funny. I'm just gonna say that it's really how I immersed myself in English when I was 13 or 14, like Seinfeld and Friends. And I remember we had a video. I used to tape them on a video cassette and rewatch it again and again and again, and then I had to rewind and watch it again. Yeah, I'm like, you know, I'm 41. This is what happens when you're 41. You have this experience. And. And I remember memorizing parts. And I think this is a huge, huge reason why I was. I had this affinity to English or, like, spoken English, so. Great. Yeah. So. Sorry. Keep going.

Yeah, no, totally. I mean, that's exactly what I'm talking about. So we said, there's really something to this series. And we. We decided to create a course out of it. And we had tried some, like, different methods, you know, to sell the course, to market the course and everything. We'd done some launches with our. Our existing audience, our email list, but kind of as an experiment, it was actually an idea of my business partner, Justin. He said, you know, what if we kind of, like, took what we're doing in the course and we created a video format and put it on YouTube. We already had, like, another YouTube channel and stuff, so we. We had a little bit of editing skills that we gotten together and like, okay, let's try and experiment. We'll create a new. A new channel. We'll call it Learning to a TV Series. And we made, like, two experimental videos, and then we kind of just like, left it for a while. And then we, you know, kind of were watching. And then all of a sudden, I think after a couple months, they started taking off. And so we're like, oh, you know, there's something really to this. And then I think it was after that that we started doing more. At first, I think we focused mostly on. On Friends, and then we started experimenting with other series. And obviously it's grown a lot out of that. And now we do a lot of different things on there beyond just Friends, beyond just TV series. So it's, I think, really great for learners because it helps to show them that it doesn't need to be boring. You don't need to just watch videos that have to do with, like, memorizing certain grammar rules or things like that. But you can tie it to things that you really enjoy. You can. You can laugh with it. You know, you can make an experience.

Yeah.

Then fires you or that blows your mind or whatever is the case, because you can find all a series or a movie or something like that that does all of those things. So that's really what we're all about at RealLife. English is helping people to connect their English to their life and to, you know, find things that are meaningful for you. So it doesn't feel like a struggle to learn language. Rather, it's something that you want to do that you love, that it. It's just like a part of your life that you even stop thinking about something that I have to study. Instead, it's just, you know, it's your life. It's what you do. You're living your life through English.

I love that so much. And that, like, got me to think I have a few things to say about that. But one question that popped to my mind was, okay, so what you're saying is, like, English as an experience, as a lifestyle. I talk about it a lot, too. Like, if you think of it as a project or something that you need to do in three months, six months, one year, and then that's it, you're done. It's really not the case. And you're not going to see the results that you're after unless you make it a part of your life. And making it a fun part of your life. And even entertainment, like, as a form of entertainment is so incredibly effective. And the question that came to mind was, how do you define fluency? When people tell you, and I'm not talking about the, you know, academic definition of speaking at a certain rate, without pauses, blah, blah, blah. But like, how do you. When you see your students and you have thousands and thousands of them, and when they tell you or they express like, this is what I want to have. If you had to put it in words and also with your experience learning languages, how would you define fluency?

Yeah, I think it'd be helpful to first just say what it is not. And it is not speaking perfectly. It's not speaking like a native. Natives even make mistakes. So, I mean, you're never gonna get to a level of English where you don't make mistakes. It's just. It's a pipe dream. It's impossible. I like to set a very low bar for fluency. I think that fluency, you know, it's a sliding scale. So it's not like, you know, you're fluent or you're not. It's like you can be a little bit fluent or you can be, you know, extremely fluent. You can be very so comfortable, probably like you. You're so comfortable that you know it's like your native language at that point.

And yet I think that, like you said a scale, like, there are some situations where I feel less fluent and some situations where I feel more fluent. So it's not always consistent too.

Yeah, for me too, with the. The languages that I'm fluent in, it can depend on the day even. It's like one, you know, I. I wake up and it's just like for some reason my mouth's just not working, you know, in the other language. Yeah. So, yeah, you'll have days where you feel like, I'm so fluent in other days where you're like, what is wrong with me? It's just like not connecting.

Not connecting. Or sometimes you can start and you go strong and then you get distracted for a second, and then you start fumble over your words and. And you're like, wait, that's not what I'm trying to say now. It might happen to you in your first language too. But then you don't categorize it as flow fluency issues. It's just like, oh, I got distracted. But then you start second guessing your fluency. Okay, I love that.

I think that's really important because we're so much harder on ourselves when we're speaking a new language, when we're speaking a foreign language, when English isn't your first language and you're speaking it. It's like people are so critical of, like, making mistakes of Getting tongue tied of something not coming out perfect the first time they say it than they are in their native language. Because if you start to pay attention to it even, I mean, even since we've been on this live, I've noticed a couple of times I trip over my words and stuff. Stuff doesn't always come out perfectly. It's like your mouth is a muscle and everything and like any other muscle in your body, like sometimes it just doesn't move, it doesn't perform exactly like you want it to. So yeah, I think you need to be like a little bit more forgiving. You need to understand it's a process and everything. And kind of as long as you have kind of like we were talking about before, that motivation, that passion that you're showing up every day, then you know you are going to get there, you're going to achieve what you want to achieve with it. So think it's, that's a very good place to start from is like being gentle with yourself. Kind of practicing that self acceptance and English can be a really great pathway for that.

Absolutely. Like, I think that people who start incorporating, you know, more compassion and forgiveness, they start tackling other challenges in their lives in a better way. Right. Like there is the ripple effect that starts affecting other areas in life if you start doing that in English. So you started talking about mindset and how important mindset is for your fluency. You didn't even mention vocabulary or grammar or you know, like you gotta watch X amount of videos a day to be able to reach where you want to reach. So why do you think it's so important to incorporate those mindset strategies and techniques when it comes to speaking fluency?

I, I think that if you want to do anything in your life, like, I mean speaking English is just one example. And that's one of the things I love is I've always tried to help, you know, my students. When I, when I used to have private students and stuff is be like, okay, this is an opportunity for you to improve your English and your life because if you work on these things then you can apply it to anything else that you want to learn or achieve in your life. So I think just having like that base of like having the right mindset that's going to set you up for success in anything. We, in our coaching program that we used to have when we were teaching private students, the thing we would always start with is, I mean a lot of people might have heard of Simon Sinek's work and stuff. So we would always Kind of like, start with why. Start with, what is your purpose? What is that thing that you're. That you're learning the language for? That in the end you can come back to when you're having a really hard time, when you have those days where it's difficult, where you really don't want to sit down and study English, or you're, you know, you're not feeling motivated to watch that video, that you're going to do it anyway because you connect to that purpose. So that deep. Why? For. For your reasons for learning the language, for why it's important to you. And I always tell people too, like, try to dig deep for that. So don't just say, like, I need it for a job, or I need it so I can make more money or I need it.

Yeah.

Parents tell me I have to learn it. But, like, really try to find something inner and deeper. And there's like an exercise called the Five Whys. So you start with if you're. You're starting. One is like, you know, I want to be able to get a job where English is required and be like, hey, why? It's like, so I can provide a better life for my wife and my kids. And you can ask why again? And you can kind of keep digging and stuff, and maybe you'll get to a reason that's like, completely far away. Like, maybe it's connected to wanting to give your kids bigger opportunities than. Than you've had or, you know, whatever the case is for any individual. But I find if you dig deep like that, you're going to get something that's completely unique to you. I even used to have, like, my students write it on a sticky note and put it, like, on their computer or put it somewhere where they will see a verse every single day. So you can really burn that into your brain and, you know, come back to that all the time.

That's so great. This is an excellent exercise to do. Just sit down with a piece of paper and really start digging deep. And it's hard. It's hard to dig deep because, you know, usually when I ask my students, what do you want? And they say, I want to be fluent. But that's. That's. That's a tool. That's a tool to get you to what you really want. Why do you want to be fluent in English and not in, you know, German or Japanese? And I was recently, I just. We talked about it. I released a new program where motivation and habits or forming habits take up, you know, a big part of the program. And we also talk about the why. And I discuss the Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Right. And then to identify what it is. And it's very similar to what you're saying, like what are your five whys? And that is like what are your needs? Is it a physical need? Is it like to provide for your family? Is it, you know, you just want to build your confidence? Is it you want love and connection with family and friends? Is it to have the self confidence? Is it to self actualize yourself and to impact and to, you know, find your calling? Even so, because when you have a voice and when you recognize that English is a tool for you to teach people or affect people, that's like a totally different ballgame. And I absolutely agree. Like, that is the fuel that gets you going. But then you also mentioned something and let's talk about that is. Okay, so I have the motivation. But a lot of times when you see it with your students, they have the motivation. They start, you know, the first week, they practice every day. Second week, they practice almost every day. And then the following week something else comes up and they're getting really busy and all of a sudden they forget and they, so what else needs to happen for them to stick through the program or stick through their, you know, their goals until they see the results in addition to motivation?

Totally. And I think too that's coming back to like, the thing is like be gentle with yourself and stuff. Like learn to have that positive self talk. Because there's a lot of people, people be very perfectionist and stuff. And it's like all or nothing, right? It's like if I can't show up for an hour every day, it's like, so it's, you know, set the bar lower and be gentle with yourself. And even if you can only do five minutes because you're really busy today, that's awesome. Like you've showed up. And that comes down to where it's a habit. Right? So you're showing up every single day and you're doing something, even if it's just five minutes, because it's more important that you're, you're showing up every day that you're, you're there.

Yeah.

Than it is that, you know, you're doing X hours per week or whatever the case is or trying what you think, you know, means that you're going to be fluent or something. And if you can set up that habit first, then it's like, okay, you'll have days maybe where you have a little bit More time. So you can do. You can do even maybe more than you expect or. But if you start with something small, like even, like five minutes, I think something really great about that is sometimes you'll just start and then you'll, like, look at the clock, and then, like, you know, 30 minutes will have gone by and you're like, oh, I didn't. I was just so true. Yeah. It's really important, too, to tie it to things that you really enjoy, too. Right. Because that's where, you know, you'll get carried away and you won't realize how much time has passed.

Exactly. Like, to tie it to something you enjoy. And this is like. It also shows that your work is all around that to prove. Provide content for students to learn from and to enjoy. But also, you know, I love what you said about, like, to get started. And the thing is that we. When we think about, oh, I gotta practice my English now, I'm gonna have to find someone to talk to, or I'm gonna have to just focus on sitting down and opening the app or your workbook or whatever it is that, you know, think about. All I need to do is just open up the app.

Right.

And then find one little thing, and I'm gonna put a timer for five minutes, and then I'm gonna quit. And then usually, like you said, this is easier to commit to and to say, yes, I'm gonna do it. And then usually you. You start getting more involved and you get excited about it, because all of a sudden it's just, okay, I actually enjoy doing it. It's like working out. It's like really building any other habit. We really need to look at it in the same way. And I even recommend. And I've also read it in James Clear's book called Atomic Habits. If you want to build habits, this is a good book to work with. And he talks, what you said, he talks about putting an upper threshold, that if you're starting to build a habit for the first, let's say month, put an upper threshold so you never exceed that time. Only, like 20 minutes, even if it's really exciting, so that it never feels like a burden. So the next day you won't be like, oh, yesterday I was, like, spending two hours, you know, doing work. I don't have to do it, or it's too much. I don't have time. And being very forgiving is so true. Like, I. I think this is key.

Yeah.

So one of the things that you are responsible for, and I'm just going to point out again, like, you know, the reason why I love your work is because, first of all, it's innovative. Like, you're doing things out of need, like learn English with TV series, but you also have reallife English, and you recognize things that people need and then you just create a solution for them. So let's talk about something that you recently created, which is the app called RealLife English, where people can actually, they can practice their listening skills. And you pretty much, like, analyze, you know, interviews and their videos, and they have the script and all of that good stuff, and you explain different words and it's a podcast, but beyond that, it's an opportunity for people to connect. So tell me a little bit more about it and why you decided to come up with this solution.

Right. This is something we've been working on for a really long time, like five years or something like that. And we've had, you know, many different challenges. We actually have released some versions in the past and stuff, but they haven't worked out just because, you know, people we were working with and where we were at at that time and things we need to learn. But we did just launch one month ago, so it is available. You can go search in the Apple Store, the Apple App Store, or the Google play store for RealLife English, and it should pop right up. And what this came out of, like, the focus has always been on speaking. Because with everything we've done, blogging, we've done podcasts, we've done videos, and these are all really great solutions for learning for your listening and stuff. But if you talk to any English learner out there, they'll always tend to say that they don't have enough opportunities to speak. And we're like, okay, how can we help people with this? And we actually started out, our company started out in Brazil. We did events where people would be able to come together and at like a bar or something like that, a very informal situation, and, you know, have a beer and speak English and we'd do like different activities. And this blew up in the city we were living in, you know, we'd have like a hundred to 150 people. Wow. And so, yeah, the, the idea originally came out of that is like, okay, how can we take this experience and make it available, you know, to the world? Because something physical like that, it's very difficult to scale. So kind of like out of that, the idea we came out of was short conversations. So it's almost like you get to. As if you were in a bar and you, you need to go around and like meet a bunch of different people. There's. So basically you will press a button and you will automatically be connected to a person in another part of the world for a four minute conversation. And you can extend for longer if you're enjoying the conversation or you can go on to the next person. But the great thing about this is you can spend, I don't know, 20 minutes and you can meet five different people from five different countries and learn about different cultures, learn about different people. And ultimately you can just kind of like expand your worldview because you're getting to see how different people live and different ways of thinking and things like this that take you out of your corner of the world and you know how people might think there and stuff. So that's something that we're really excited about is just the potential with that. And we've seen that it can have a huge impact on people. So if you need to speak, that's basically, that's our objective there right now. So we want to make sure that it's a really good experience when you go and you speak, you want to speak English, it's. You'll have no excuses because all you need to do is open the app and press a button.

So first of all, you guys go download the app and join so you will have that freedom to start a conversation at any given moment. I think it's a brilliant idea. You know my take on it and I think like, there is no English learning without community learning. I think it's a huge part of improving and practicing and just like feeling like you're. You matter, right? And like you can influence people and you can learn about other people. And this is why I have my community, which is a different way of connecting people. And this is so easy. And what I love about it is that speaking of the upper threshold, it gives you permission to just like, to just taste it, you know, and on one hand it's just like, it's not threatening. You can have a quick talk. It's also you develop the skill of like quick small talk. So you have to think fast, you have to work fast, and you have to learn how to, you know, it really is like walking between people and having small talk, which is something that people are really concerned about or worried about, especially now that we haven't had this opportunity for almost a year and a half. And it really stimulates that. And I do think it's so, so great. And really I would love for everyone here to take advantage of it. And it's free now, right? Like, if they join and they have access to. I love it. What else can they find there?

Yeah, so that's the speaking part of it. And we also have like a listening part, which right now it just uses our podcast and our new talk show, which Hadar was just a guest on. So you can go find that one and listen to that. That was a really fun interview to do, and our entire team was just like, blown away by it. So I think maybe people are used to hearing you won't be so shocking and stuff, but I think that there was just so much to learn there. But yeah, you can find a lot of lessons like this. You can find our podcast and you have full transcripts for them. So, I mean, this is very helpful for people. Listening to podcasts can be pretty intimidating, you know, when it's all in English. So this can be very helpful because you have a transcript that you can actually follow. As we're speaking, it moves and like, all the most important words are highlighted. You can see all the definitions and then you can see, you know, basically like a summary with all the words from that. And we're currently working also on other features that you'll be able to actually study the vocabulary that you learn. And, you know, we'll continue building on top of that.

So amazing. What a great tool. Thank you for creating it. And I think we collaborated once years ago, and back then you told me that you're working on it and you just launched last month. So here's a question. What would you say to someone that says, okay, great, like, can I speak to native speakers using this app? Because I don't think it's going to be as valuable to speak with non native speakers. What are your thoughts about that?

Yeah, I mean, that's one of the big differentiators is that maybe you'll meet a native speaker on there. It's not so likely. One of the big things that we value on there is this aspect of culture exchange. So kind of like I was saying is that it's really interesting when you can meet people from, you know, in 20 minutes, you can meet five people from five different countries and kind of hear about their life there and stuff and start to kind of discover the world. Like, I kind of like to say that it's like a virtual passport that's going to take you, you know, traveling around the world through the comfort of your own home. So I think that's one of the. You have to see, like, that second benefit of it. And I think it's also, it's kind of like, especially in the last year since the pandemic and everything, it's much closer to the reality of what the world is going to be like now. And you know, if you're wanting to work in a big company, like a big global company, it's much more likely you're going to be using your English to speak to someone you know in Germany, in China, in Thailand, in Israel, and not just people from the United States or the UK or Australia. So that's like something that can be really beneficial is that you are not just practicing your ear to be able to like respond to people who are from the United States or from the UK but that you also be confident. You know, if you, if you have a business meeting with someone in India or in Japan or whatever the case is, because you will have talked to people from there, you will kind of know their different ways of speaking and stuff. And then I think the final point of it too is a lot of people, they kind of like worry that people's mistakes are going to rub off on them, which is something that's, it's very unlikely that that's going to happen. Maybe if you were only speaking English with people from one country and you're always hearing those same mistakes, you might like start to think that that's the right way of speaking. But if you're connecting with people from a bunch of different countries, it's not so likely. And especially if you have those good habits that we talked about that you're constantly like listening to things, watching things that have that native English, so you have really good input. And what's more important to focus on there with speaking with people from other countries is you're getting that output practice. You're getting the practice speaking. So I wouldn't worry so much, you know, about native or non native when it comes to actual speaking practice because the important thing is that you're speaking as much as possible, you're getting that practice, and then outside of that speaking time, get as much practice as possible as you can listening to natives.

Yeah, exactly. So it's really good and it's a good point. I'm going to stress that because a lot of people are afraid of it. Of like, I don't want to speak to non native speakers because I'm going to make the say, you know, they're gonna speak with mistakes and it's gonna confuse me or I'm gonna learn mistakes. And my counter example is that when you hear, you know, correct with air quote Quotation marks. Because, like, what is correct anyway? Okay, but grammatically correct English, that doesn't rub off on you, right? Like, it's not like you hear, you know, the proper usage of the tense and then you're like, oh, now I know how to use it. The English speaking process is a lot deeper and more complex than I hear and I produce. Right. There's something that happens here that filters out what you're hearing, whether it's the correct form or the incorrect form, the right word or a word that is mispronounced. So there is a lot more that goes into you absorbing a certain structure or word or pronunciation pattern and then using it right away. Right? Just like you can't improve simply by listening, but by using it intentionally. That's the first thing. And the second thing is like when I learned language acquisition, there is this theory. The theory suggests that children, when they acquire a language, there is a stage where they have learned the language in a deficient way, not fully. Right. When they're just learning the language and sometimes they keep making a certain mistake and their parents correct them. Right? So maybe they wouldn't. I, you know, she want, instead of she wants, right. Or whatever. Like, the child is just like barely producing the language and the parent might correct them, but if they're not, if they haven't evolved in terms of their stages, their learning stages, it doesn't matter how many times the parent is going to correct them. They're not going to be able to implement it until they reach the right stage. And I think it's very much the same with learning another language. You need to reach a certain, like another stage for you to be able to integrate that new word or that new, you know, grammatical structure, like understanding the conflict and then executing it or producing it. So I think we need to remember that and to remember that it's not like there isn't this dichotomy between, you know, proper English and proper English and, and how it's being used.

And I think the other there too is a lot of times people want to speak with a native because they think, oh, I'm going to make a friend and you know, he or she is going to correct all of my English. She had all of my mistakes, right? And that's not going to happen. Like, as long as that person can understand you, it's very unlikely that they will correct you unless maybe they're a teacher. So I would not be so focused on that because it's very unlikely that, like with me here, for example, with Katan it's like, in the beginning, I made so many mistakes I wasn't even aware of because people could understand me. My friends would never say anything. And then, like, a couple years ago, I wanted to challenge myself, so I signed up for the C1 exam in Catalan, and I got a teacher to help me to pass it and stuff. And it's like I just realized there's all these mistakes that I've been making for years and never had corrected because, like, no one had ever told me their mistakes. So if you want someone to correct your mistakes, you're much better off paying a teacher if you can. Or even finding, you know, another person who's learning, who's a little bit more advanced and, you know, practicing with them and asking that person if they notice any mistakes that they could help you, because I think that's more likely. They've been on the same journey. They have that empathy and stuff. So they probably will be more likely to sympathize with you and say, okay, yeah, I can. I can help you out and stuff than a native would, because. And yeah, other things, like, we natives don't even tend to know, you know, what are mistakes and what aren't. It's like something maybe doesn't sound right, but we can't explain why. Right.

That's so very true. That. That's so true. And also, I think it's important to shift, like, if you go into a conversation, make it about the conversation. Like, make it about the other person that's going to allow so much freedom. And don't think about the English so much, because that's when you reach a breakthrough, when you're like, you have this energy that just that need to connect and to express something that goes beyond grammar and beyond the mistakes. And that's what true freedom is. So when you constantly think about, how can I, you know, do the work, Practice, for sure. Like, I think it's important. I think that that allows freedom. Form provides freedom. So this is why, you know, we do the pronunciation exercises or the grammar drills or whatever it is, or like listening exercises. But then when you're in a conversation, trust the work that you've done and really focus on the conversation and not so much about. On your English or your mistakes, because then you. You will always stay limited because you're thinking about the form when you need to be in the freedom, you know, So I think that's another.

I think it's, like, nice to compare, for example, to sports, which people tend to have, like, a good conceptualization for is, you know, when it's during the game, like a soccer game, you don't want to be, like, focused on the kind of, like, drills that you've done to, like, kick the ball in the exact right way or whatever the case is. You want to be focused on, you know, on just, like, playing, on being there in the moment, on knowing what's going on on the field and stuff. So it's the same when you're speaking English. It's like the time to focus on kind of like form, like you were saying. If you're. If you're focusing a lot on pronunciation or on having exactly the right word. That's like, during your study time. That's when you're at home, you know, sitting down and doing your routine. That's not. When you're having a conversation with someone. When you need to be present, you need to be listening to what other person is saying and be able to. To be there, to respond, to connect, like you've said.

Exactly. Like, if you're constantly thinking about your English or your mistakes, then you're not really present. The other person is going to feel that, and probably they're not going to want to connect with you, because people want to connect with people who are attentive and they pay attention and they listen to them. So you want to be an active listener and you want to, you know, really think about what they're saying so you'll be able to respond and not just to be so consumed with your own answer. And I love, you know, I always compare learning English to sports. I think there are, like, a lot of parallel lines. But also as an actor, you know, when I used to work in a particular role, it was really very much the same. You work on the character, you figure out their motives and, you know, objectives and their history and, you know, her relationship and what she's trying to get. And you memorize all of that. But when you walk on stage, if you start thinking about, you know, she's doing this because her dad said this to her when she was like, you're going to be in your head and not in your body.

Right?

Like, you won't feel present, and then people recognize that you're not genuine. This is how you distinguish between an actor that you connect with and you feel that they're the character and someone who is just reciting text. So I think it's very much the same. Leave it at the door. And you go into a conversation to a moment where you communicate with people.

Yeah, I love that. Parallel with. With acting. I didn't know that before. I'm definitely going to use that, though.

So. Have you ever taken acting classes in the past?

I did, like, very amateur stuff when I was in. In like, high school and middle school, but I. I would say not really.

I just think that there is so much that goes into learning languages and learning acting. Like, if we think of improv games, you know, thinking intuitively and speaking fast and all of that, but also, you know, kind of like immersing yourself in a different character. I think that there is. I love to incorporate, you know, things that I've learned in acting school into my teachings and my. My courses. I think it's so cool. You got to try it out.

Yeah. To try it. Definitely. It's been on my, like, to do list. You know, I actually was planning on that, and then the pandemic hit, so it's kind of like, haven't been able to go, but now it's like something to start considering again.

How has it been for you on a personal level when, you know, living in Spain for so long, you probably haven't been able to travel back home or to do what you were used to doing. How did you cope with that?

I mean, definitely for me, like, travel is one of my biggest passions and stuff, so that was definitely very hard. And luckily, I did get to go back to the States in. I think it was in April. It was kind of like when things opened up enough to, you know, be able to go travel. And. And so I. I did take advantage of that. And so it's was really nice. I mean, it's very difficult. Like, definitely sounds ungrateful, but it's very difficult traveling, you know, with a mask for 16 hours or whatever the case is. But for sure, I think, like, that was really important to me to be able to see my family again after a really long time. I think that that was probably one of the most difficult parts. But in general, I mean, I think I already have, like, a business online and stuff. I know so many people that were struggling because either they lost their job or their job suddenly became remote and they didn't really know how to deal with that.

Yeah. Yeah.

Kind of like, if no changes. I mean, we've been practicing for this for years, so it's kind of like.

I know a lot of people ask me, like, you know, how has it been for you? I do have a local school which, you know, we sort of shut down because of the pandemic, but everything just kept going. And even, you know, I think the need for a community even grew. So I think that was a huge part of the work, you know, and we really, we kind of like surrendered into that need and, and just like capitalize on that. So when you talked about your, you know, when you moved to the, to Germany and, and then to Brazil and all of those places as a college student, as a. As an adult teenager, it's like, it's amazing. And I, I share the same experience, but I'm going to get stereotypical here. But it's not something that you see. It's not something that is very common to see. You know, Americans travel all around the world at a younger age and kind of like immersing in new cultures, learning different languages. I've lived in the us I've had like, a lot of American friends, and it's something that I haven't seen a lot. Like, most of my friends haven't been abroad, like outside of the U.S. you know. So what drew you? Because it's not something that is in Israel. Like, it's a thing. You finish the military service and you travel for a year abroad. Like it's a thing. It's in the culture. So I'm asking, because it's not a part of the culture in the U.S. what still drew you to start traveling and doing all those crazy things that you did?

It's a good question. I mean, I would say probably, metaphysically, maybe something in my soul, because I think, like, when I was younger, it was very difficult for me to conceptualize, like, being away from home for that long and, and. And things like that. So, you know, I had a very close relationship with my family, and I really had, like, no reason to want to leave. And pretty much before then I had pretty limited travel experience. But I think what kind of happened was when I was in middle school, my aunt had moved to Germany to. She was like, working on the military base in Germany. And so I went with my mom to visit her. And I just remember that it's like we. We were at a barbecue and like, kind of like hanging out with the German kids there and like, talking to them. And I just kind of grew this fascination, you know, with how people were living in a different part of the world and stuff. And that probably kind of like stuck with me. I planted a seed. And when I got to high school, I started taking German classes. And then I actually had a friend of mine whose sister studied abroad in Costa Rica. And she came back and we were talking about, like, her experience and stuff, and she handed Me, the pamphlet. And so I started kind of like, just looking, and basically that's what happened. And I went abroad just six months, because I was like, I can't. Six months is so long. Like, how would I be away from my family and. And my life here for so long? And then it's like, the six months flew by, and I was like, why the heck. For sure, six months, not a year, you know?

Yeah, absolutely. And then. And then that's it. Like, once you experience that, you know, I always say that every person should live abroad for at least six months once in their lifetime. I think it's so rewarding and, like, being exposed to different cultures, recognizing that you're not the only person in the world, or, no, not everyone looks like you. And then I think about my daughter, and then I was like, when she's 18, if she tells me that she's traveling to the US for one year, like I did, or to Paris for one month, I'm like, I'm taking your passport, young lady. So I don't know.

I. I don't know if understanding is the right word. Like, accepting, you know, that this was something that I was passionate about and. And that I felt more at home in some sense, outside of the United States than in the United States. So I definitely. Very lucky, because I know not everyone's parents are that liberal in that sense.

Absolutely. And I. I think it's the same for me because really, like, When I was 18, I traveled to Paris alone for almost a month, you know, and then I discovered that. And it was a lot like, you know, it wasn't an organized tour or everything, and just to be, you know, like, to sit in a cafe and to walk around, that gave me so much validation, and I really. I was really connected to my identity. And I think that you. You can definitely relate because it's pretty much what you said. And this is why ever since, I really look for those trips abroad where before it was on my. On my own, but even with my family. And yes, when during the pandemic, it was really hard because once a year, we travel the entire family to different places, and we live in a place for a month or two.

Amazing.

Yeah, it's so amazing. Like, and I'm lucky because I can work remotely in YouTube. I think it's. It's recognizing that you're a citizen of the world, you know, and there are, like, all these amazing people that you can, you know, just look at and be so grateful that you're a part of this.

So, yeah, and there's the digital version of that as well. I mean, nowadays, like, I think even during the pandemic, one of the things that I was very grateful for is like, okay, I can't travel and everything, but like, our team, for example, is. I mean, it's almost like a little microcosm in the world because we have people in South America, we have people in. In Europe. And so I was connecting with people from a lot of different countries and stuff, and in my day to day, so it's like at least a little bit I could go beyond that. And I think that there's so many opportunities out there like you were talking about. Community became very important. And I think being part of a global community, so if you can't afford to travel or you can't travel because of the pandemic, you know, it's. It's still really nice to have that connection to other places and to kind of spur on that curiosity of how are people living in other places and, you know, just being open to that, Being a citizen of the world.

Yeah, absolutely. We gotta remember that it's a privilege to be able to travel, because for many people around the world, it's not. Not just financially with that of course too, but like even getting a visa somewhere or traveling, you know, one of my team members is like, we always talk about it. She lives in Moscow. And, you know, what is available to me is not available to her necessarily, especially during a pandemic. And, you know, just to take a moment and say, I know it's not the case for everyone and it is a huge privilege. And I want to, you know, recognize that and acknowledge that.

Yeah, I'm definitely always extremely grateful for that because I recognize it's. It's not a privilege that everyone in the world has, but I do recommend, even if you are from a place, if you don't have a lot of money, it's like, you know, travel to the next town, travel, you know, travel wherever your means will allow you to travel and stuff. It's kind of like it's a really big world and, you know, and it's.

Beautiful that even if you can't, you have, you know, the digital world to allow you to still connect with other people. Like the real life English app and the influencing community and YouTube and all of that good stuff that we have. Ethan, before we wrap up anything, like, last thing, you want to share, a tip or anything else you'd like to.

Share with the audience, it's a good question. I think, like, right now we've been kind of given an opportunity with this pandemic. I know a lot of places are opening up, but a lot of places are still kind of like living, you know, with the. The consequences of it and being stuck inside. So it's like, I would probably say take it as an opportunity. See, like, what can I do that? I've always wanted to do that. Now I have the opportunity because, like, you know, I can't go outside. Maybe you can't see, like, your. Your friends and stuff that you normally would, but try something new. You know, maybe there's an instrument you've always wanted to play. Maybe it's just like committing more to learning English or learning another language or whatever it is for you. But I'd say, you know, get curious, try something new.

Absolutely. I love that. So, Ethan, thank you so, so much for this beautiful conversation and for sharing with us, you know, a little bit more about yourself and about how you think and see the world and English. And again, if you don't know, learn English with TV series, then it's one of their places where they share their content, where you can learn with the TV series. But also RealLife English YouTube channel and an app. This is where they can find you anywhere else. Instagram, RealLife English.

Instagram@RealLife. English is the channel there. And of course, the app, as you already mentioned and our blog, but I'd say probably YouTube and Instagram and the app. You have most squares covered.

Yeah. Cool. All right, Ethan, so thank you so, so much. Bye, everyone.

But.