177. Real Stories About What's Possible | Interview with Lucrecia

Welcome to the Influency Podcast. I'm Hadar, your host, and today we are going to hear success stories.

Hey, everyone.

Thank you so much for tuning in for another episode of the Influency podcast today. I'm super, super thrilled to have you here because today I'm going to share with you an interview that I conducted with a few of my favorite people in this world. And those people are my students, my dear students. And they are going to share with you their English journey, where they used to be and where they are today. And there is quite a difference. And they're going to share with you what they've done to reach that place of freedom and confidence and success and all their accomplishments thanks to that shift and change in their English and approach to English. And also they're going to share where they were and the limitations and the things that held them back and what they did to let go of those limitations. So this is such an inspiring episode. And it's not just me telling you this because I'm not objective, obviously, but people who heard them speak kept sharing how inspiring it was and motivating. And I think that you deserve to hear that too. And this is why I'm sharing it here. Once you listen to this episode, I would love for you to come back to me and share with me what you feel about this and about their stories. You can find me on Instagram, Hadar Accentsway and. Yeah, and tell me what you think. So, thank you for being here and I can't wait to share with you today's episode. So let's listen.

Today we have Lucrecia and she is our student and she will tell you about her story and what is possible for her today thanks to the work that she's done, a lot of mindset work and how she shifted from feeling insecure and, you know, she immigrated to Canada from Brazil and feeling insecure about English and, you know, creating and teaching and working in English.

Hi. Hello.

Hello, my love. How are you doing?

Hi.

I'm doing great.

Okay. For those who don't know you, and that means that they're not in an influencing community because you are the, you know, the star of the speaking club. Would you like to introduce yourself?

Thank you for your kind words. Yes. I am Lucrecia Furman. I am from Brazil. I was born and raised there. I lived in three different states in that country and all of them have borders with Spanish speaking countries there. I was a teacher for elementary and high school. I am a language teacher. I teach Brazilian Portuguese how to read and how to write and grammar, you know, and everything related to language, which is a sort of hindrance when I. It was a sort of hindrance when I was learning English, you know, because being a language teacher, I thought I should be perfect in another language, you know, and this kind of feeling is all about mindset and stuff like that. I also worked for university there, and then I moved to Canada in 2019 to take my PhD degree. I applied for that, you know, it was my teenage dream. And I just realized, you know, I just accomplished, like achieved my dream when I was 30 years after dreaming of that. Which also tells about patience and, you know, planning and stuff like that. And here I'm taking my PhD degree and I work as a teaching assistant and a research assistant for the university and I also work as an instructional assistant in elementary school with autistic children in a pre K class. That's it in a nutshell.

Amazing.

And tell us a little bit about your experience. So two things. One, you said that as a language teacher, it was a hindrance for you.

Because.

You had all these opinions about how the language is meant to be spoken or used. And then when you moved into a new language, all of a sudden you felt probably inadequate and maybe sometimes incapable. And how did you feel in English when you moved to Canada?

When I moved here, I was both learning the language and I was an immigrant. You know, it was a sort of shift in my identity. It was an identity shifting process. I was shifting from my country, I was moving to Canada, and I was immersed in a different language. I came with my family and I have a brother here. So we spoke speak mostly in my language at home, which means that I am a bilingual person. I use both languages in my daily basis, which is really interesting. But this identity process was really overwhelming. And that imposter syndrome that you mentioned came so strong, you know, it was really. It was a bit overwhelming. I wasn't expecting that, that stuff, you know, maybe people who live abroad feel the same stuff, you know, I don't know if you had the same experience when you lived abroad.

100%.

Yeah. This kind of identity shift, you know, I used to tell my husband, I wish I could move to a place where nobody knows me. And then all of a sudden I was here, you know, and my story, the things that I did back home and stuff like that, nothing was important anymore because no one, you know, knew me. And I have to fall back on small things, small accomplishment to. To value myself, to myself, you know, to feel valued and yeah, that. That wasn't easy. And when you named that imposter syndrome, and the proud and loud festival that I joined was last, last year, I thought to myself, that is what I'm feeling right now. I am not the same person that I was. And it's not easy. So, yeah, that was. I felt that time. Yeah.

So the imposter syndrome, for those who don't know, is this psychological pattern that actually about 70% of the people experience to certain degrees, but it really hits the bad, marginalized communities, women, people of color, LGBTQ community, because, you know, there is like the standard and the norm and what is power. And everyone who is not in a status that is the power or is perceived as the power may experience it more. And it's this feeling as if what you do is never good enough. And actually, you know, it's really hard to celebrate our achievements because in our hearts, we feel that we are a fraud. And even if something succeeds, right, if we succeed, it's a fluke and people are going to find out the real truth about us. And it hits us in our careers and our relationships, right? Like, it's really essentially the feeling of not being good enough and feeling like a fraud. But when it comes to speaking a second language, I think there is like an even added layer to. So not only that you're not good enough because you're like, you're always compared.

With a native speaker, right? Speak like a native, and this is.

How you should sound. And you compare it with your own language, right? So even there, there is comparison. It's like not good enough.

I don't know.

So there is that alone. And also really feeling like, you know, you want to express yourself and you're limited, right? So it does make you feel like you are. You're not yourself and therefore you're an imposter.

You're a fraud, you're fake.

And I think that we need to understand that this is not reality, right? Like, we're not bad, but it's a pattern that is designed to keep us safe, right? Because so we don't fail and we don't get judged and we don't get criticized, right? So designed to keep us because the imposter syndrome prevents us from taking action. Would you say that this is something that happened to you? Like, did you find yourself not taking action because of that?

I found you on the Internet about O, as in go. And that was the first time then I joined the community. At that time, when you proposed that challenge, that 30 days challenge, it was July 2018. And I recorded those videos and I had them in my laptop, but I never posted them because I thought they weren't good enough, you know, and when I compared, again, the comparison with other people, I thought to myself, oh, my God, I'm not good enough. I'm not gonna post that, you know, because I'm not gonna make myself as a fool, you know, because I'm not speaking that well, and stuff like that. And when we have a native speaker in mind, actually we have an imagined native speaker. You know, there is this concept about. About imagined communities by Benedict Anderson, and there is an imagined native speaker, you know, because there are native speakers from a lot of countries, but we try to pursue a specific native speaker and why we do that. It is also related to power, to other things. It's not related only to cognitive skills. When I realized that learning English is not only about my intelligence and my cleverness and stuff like that, but it is also related to my inner feelings, how I feel as a person, how I feel as an English speaker, you know, that was a kind of shifting, a kind of turning point in my learning. And it came when I participated in that challenge that. Because you mentioned that imposter syndrome. You named the feeling that I felt. You know, you gave that a name. Another thing that you mentioned was the compound effect. You know, we have to practice small things every day are better than one big event, you know, once a week. What else? I have my notes here because there is a lot of stuff that, you know, came from that. I think it's do behave mode. You know, it was a sort of mindset work. That was the thing I needed. And we have some conversations here at home. I talk to my brother about that. And I always mention it is not related to a cognitive process, because I was told that English was an easy language. You know, it's really easy to learn English.

What are the things that are possible for you today that weren't possible before you started understanding the whole idea? Before that mindset shift and before the, you know, understanding that there is this idea of compound effect where you need to invest and do take action every day, like positive action to lead you to where you are today. So can you talk about that?

The main thing is being here today before. And I wasn't, you know, I thought I wasn't capable to do this kind of stuff, you know, because watching me over a camera and, you know, and talk to a person like you, you are my. My models in terms of role models, in terms of, you know, learning English and speaking English. So I started to follow you on YouTube and Facebook and social media. And now being here talking to you in English, you understand me. You know, because when I just joined, like the accent makeover challenge, we used to. To have those live videos, live coaching sessions. And I remember that I was there, and I always thought to myself, please don't call me. Please don't call me. Please don't call me. Because if you called me, I. I knew I should show up. And because it was so hard. I am a sort of introvert person. I have this kind of fear of exposing myself. I always think of, you know, over and over again about things that I just said and stuff like that. So this kind of shifting in my mindset was the thing that I celebrate the most, you know, and also I am able to being a teaching assistant at university over zoom. And I can talk to students in a room full of most of them native speakers. And I'm not afraid of making mistakes anymore. And even when I host a speaking club, sometimes people call me, like, teacher or stuff like that, and I tell them, oh, I'm not a teacher here. I'm an English learner like you. And you're gonna see that I'm gonna make a lot of mistakes, you know, but this is. And this. This acceptance that I am gonna fail sometimes when I speak another language and no one's gonna die, you know, life is gonna continue.

No one's gonna die. Nope, Exactly.

This is the best achievement, I think. So to give you another idea, I went to the job interview for this. This job that I have right now. And I prepared myself watching your workshop. I was in that workshop about interview. And then I prepared. I watched that again, and I prepared myself, and I was so confident, you know, I was prepared because you taught me how to prepare myself, how to make those bullet points. Because it all comes down to be prepared, to practice questions and to do the drills and stuff like that. And I went to that job interview, and that turned to be one of the most comfortable conversations that I ever had. You know, I was being interviewed for a job. It was a great opportunity because I'm trying to be a teacher here. I do not have the certificate yet. I can't be a teacher because of that. I am an instructional assistant. And, you know, I was so prepared and so confident. I made a lot of mistakes. I didn't know some words. Like, I didn't know the word recess. That period of time when children go out and have fun and stuff like that. But, you know, that didn't matter because the interviewer was so. We are so connected. He helped me a lot, you know, he. Like, it was one of the best conversations that when I. When I, you know, tell people about that, how they only ask me, how can a job interview in English be a good conversation? It was because I was prepared and my mindset was shifting, you know?

Yeah. Wow, this is so good.

And I think, like, if you want.

To take one thing from this, is. Is this, you know, because for Lucrecia, it wasn't even an imagined thing, you know, a few years ago or when you just moved to this new country. Like, it was to have a comfortable conversation in English in a job interview when you're being, you know, observed, then it's very scary in your native language.

Right.

Like, let's just agree that a job interview is scary, especially if it's a job that you want. And walking into it like you did, I think this. And saying that, like, all it took. It's a lot, but all it took is, like, a mindset shift and preparation. And I think at the end of the day, you can achieve anything if you have, like, if you step into that. Right. Mindset, the growth mindset, the fluent mindset, if we're talking about English, and definitely if you are prepared. So you do the work, you do the training. You train yourself to succeed when the stakes are too high.

Right.

We do not rise to the level of our expectation. We fall to the level of our training. So it really is all about, yes, we want to be here, but it's not going to happen unless you have the infrastructure and the foundations. And I think that's the preparation that you're talking about.

It is. And also, I think we have to work on our limiting beliefs. You know, in my case, I had two limiting beliefs. You know, English is really easy to learn, but I can't. So I'm not clever enough, you know, And I keep that mindset.

Yeah.

Yeah. And the other limiting belief, I just turned 50 years old last September. So I used to thought to myself, I am too old to learn a language. You know, there is this kind of limiting belief. I think that people think that when we are aging, when we are in a certain age, we are not able to learn things anymore. But our brain has a plasticity. Yeah. Is able to create other connections, you know, and we are able to learn at any age. And I think we have to work on our. Because if we are. If you want to learn a language, if this is our dream, why can't we learn it. What is preventing us from learning?

Yeah, yeah.

If I really want to do some stuff, why can't I do, you know, what with me? So learning English with you, especially with you, because you were the first person who showed me this kind of inward, you know, feeling and stuff like that, how to work on my. On my mind in a positive way, in a way that boosts me, not, you know, just not in a way, stop doing that. Don't do this. You know, that is the important thing that happened, I think. Yeah.

Yeah.

Learning English, I learned a lot of stuff about myself from this process, you know, and I also learned a lot of stuff about my native language. I realized that I have some communication problems in my native language, not only in English, you know, and also I learned the IPA Alphabet. There were a lot of stuff that came together with that learning. You know, it was not only the English language, it was a whole of knowledge.

I think that when we work on a new language, you know, a language that is not our native language, it really does reveal a lot of things about how we think about languages and about communication and ultimately, the work that we do, even a new sound, like, the work that we do is about being a better communicator and trusting your voice and in finding the right strategies to do that, you know? But it's really about understanding that you are an instrument, right? And your voice is an instrument and your body is an instrument, and, like, it's just understanding how you can utilize, like, all the gifts that you're given in your brain, and you have these amazing tools to. To really allow your body and mind to thrive when it comes to communicating in a second language. Unfortunately, conventional teaching and, you know, cultural norms are really designed to mute that part in ourselves and to allow it, like, to. And to shut us down and to really create a stressful environment where the brain does not thrive. And therefore, you constantly fail or you feel like a failure. Whereas it's not you. It's the circumstances and your history and conventional teaching and the industry and messages that you get about what you should or should not sound like. I think all of that plays a significant role. And once you know how to filter through the crap and focus on what really matters and understand that you have this beautiful, you know, magical voice that needs to come out and can resonate in all of these different places in your body, and you just need to give yourself some time to experience it, I think it really shifts everything about what you've thought about communication, you know, in any language.

Yeah, that's right. I'm even learning French, you know, now, because here in Canada, we. We have this opportunity because all the products on the groceries, they have. They are labeled in those two languages. So we. We have easy access to a vocabulary, and I step out of my comfort zone in that language as well. And we have meetings, you know, to. To talk, to speak in French. And this time, I don't think to myself, don't call me. You know, I just show up because I can.

Oh, I love it.

Yeah, I can. You know, I can apply those techniques, those things that I know, because it is a long life learning. When we learn some stuff that really works, we tend to apply that to another part of our life, you know, so. Yeah. Yeah. So good.

Lucrecia, what is one piece of advice that you'd like to share with the audience here?

I'm gonna try to make a joke first, because in my country, we have a proverb that goes like, if a piece of advice was good, people not give it, People would sell it. People would not give it, people would sell it. But I'm just kidding. You know, you taught me that sharing our experience with others and sharing our time with others is also a good way to learn. So, you know, I'm just kidding about that. Selling stuff, I would say to work on. To work on your limiting beliefs. Try to know yourself better, and try to know what is really preventing you from learning English. I'm sure that it's not your cleverness or your intelligence. It might be something ignored. Another point would be, is a process of stepping out of your comfort zone. Go out, speak as much as you can. Make mistakes. You know, native speakers make mistakes. We make mistakes in our native language. So, you know, why we wouldn't make them in English. And third, the compound effect really works. You know, you have to be consistent. You have to practice, practice. When you told us about that compound effect, you told us that we would feel them like it was a magic. You know, all of the sudden I'm speaking English. Oh, all of the sudden, I am not afraid of showing up anymore. But it's not a magic. It's work. It's a hard work. You know, it's like I read out loud since last April, 2020, day in, day out for five to 10 minutes, and I'm not doing anything different from my routine. I am a Christian person. I do my daily devotions. I just started to do that out loud, and my reading in English improved, My comprehension improved, has improved. And of course, if you have the opportunity, as I had join Hadar's new sound, you know, because the course is really well organized and I had added here to talk about how accessible you are and your team. You know, when we have a question, when we are in doubt or, you know, stuff like that, we can always rely on you and your feedback.

So thank you so much. And really, it's been such an honor and privilege to have you, to follow you and to accompany you on your journey, because really, like, every time you would speak up. And I remember that the first round, I remember that you spoke once, right, in one of the coaching sessions, and you tried to explain how to pronounce your name to me, and I did not get it.

And then.

You did not ask for a hot seat again. And I remember seeing you and I'm like, why isn't she asking for a hot seat? I truly remember it because I remembered your name and I also saw your videos, you know, so it's kind of like we create that connection, but then gradually you join beyond later. And then gradually you would start speaking in the zoom sessions and share your experience. And all of a sudden all these wins started, you know, piling up. And this is exactly why I wanted you to come. Because a lot of people think that English success is if you open a YouTube channel and then you have, you know, 200,000 subscribers in one year, right? Or something big. Or that you all of a sudden you would get the job of your dreams. But English success is one feeling at ease and at home when speaking. I think that's success because then you can do anything. Then you can do anything, right? But it's like the first thing to be effortless, to feel at home. I love that, that idea. And then you start building, you know, a new reality, which is what happened to you anyway? You lived in a different country, not the country you were born in, but still, like you, you've started shifting that identity in a positive way and not in a way that made you feel, you know, inferior or not good enough, which is what we talked about before. So I think that. That seeing your journey has been so incredibly rewarding. And I want to say thank you for being a part of our community of students, but also for sharing this with us today.

Thank you, Hadar. Thank you for your words. You know, affirmative words are really important to me.

That's your love language.

Yeah, it's my love language. Thank you. Thank you for that. And thank you for all your. Your support. Thank you for all your free material, for all the free stuff that you do. You are right. When we share our experience, when we share our language knowledge, when we share our time with people, we truly improve. We grow in confidence. We grow as human beings. I think so. Thank you. Thank you very much for this opportunity. It's an opportunity. Amazing. Thank you.

Thank you very, so much.

My dear, my love. You deserve all the success that you have. Thank you very much.

It goes both ways. You too. So, thank you.

See you.

Bye, my dear.

Bye, Sam.