HELP! I'm In Menopause with Guest: Dr. Reshma Vasanwala

Foreign.

Hello, everybody.

It's clap without clapping.

Hello, everybody. It's Ron and Hope. Unfiltered, real, raw, relevant. Ronald, what are you doing?

You know, I. I think I've been wondering whether or not. Tell her I podcast community, but I think I'm in menopause.

Oh, my God.

I really do. I'm showing some symptoms.

So you're a woman.

No. Now it's men. Menopause.

Men, man. Oh, you've paused.

It's man, man. It's man. Oppose manopoles.

Oh.

Because I don't think it's right that y' all just get to enjoy it.

Enjoy it.

Yeah. And we have to kind of deal with it because I think.

Here we go. We start in a whole argument.

I think we need.

I think right as we start. Listen this podc.

When women are going through menopause, men need a pill. I think men need some type of pill. I wish the pharmaceutical company would make some type of pill for men.

They do. Whose wives are in menopauseanax. Or the other one.

When women go through menopause. What's the nickname we give it? Meanie. And so.

So what I do in the morning always asks me. He says, are you gonna be a meanie today? I'm like, I'm not sure.

Is today a meaty? I really don't know.

It depends.

Don't know what to expect today. Not sure what to do. Will I get kissed or will I get struck? You don't. You just don't know what's gonna happen. Just don't know what's gonna happen.

It's a true story. And all the women who are listening right now want to punch you in the face.

7,000 a day. Get it? 7,000 a day. Is that just an American? Is that just in America?

Why are you reading my stuff? This has nothing to do with you.

This is run and hope, unfiltered, but not hope.

Fifteen minutes ago, you weren't doing this podcast with me.

I was, but I was embarrassed because I didn't want people to know how much I need a pill.

I'm not embarrassed because all my other lady friends can identify with me. They can identify with the struggle. The struggle is real. Struggle is real. And you know it's real.

Yep, I do. I see you hanging your leg out of bed at night, hot, needing the fan to blow on it.

It's not every night.

And you won't turn the air conditioner wide open.

Sometimes I'm freezing.

Yep.

Sometimes when I get in the bed. And then midnight by Half the time I go to sleep, I'm burning up.

Your temperament.

Let's don't talk about that right now.

No, no. We got to be real raw and relevant. So how does it affect your temperament?

Sometimes I want to claw your eyes out.

There are days I've had to wear a helmet. There are days I've got up and put on a helmet. You just don't know what's coming.

So that's why you wanted to do this podcast with me, so you could come in here and talk about. And get sympathy? I want sympathy and talk about how mean I am.

I want the menopausal man pill. And this pill is for who are living in the house with women who are going through the change, and they can't figure out if they're hot or cold, if they're nice or if they're meanie. They can't figure out if they're going to be good that day or if they're going to be, but they can't figure it out. So men need a pill to be able to manage the ups and downs that come with that. And that's what I'm advocating for today in my presence.

Well, as if you didn't know what we were talking about today. It's menopause, hormone imbalance.

Y' all talking about menopause. I got to be honest.

Yes. And how it affects us women, how.

It affects the marriage, how it affects your Christianity.

What do you mean, how it affects.

Your Christianity, how it affects your walk with God.

It makes you question a lot of things in life. It really, really does.

Is it that bad?

Yes.

You feel like you're an emotional wreck, like you're gonna lose your mind, Honestly.

Is that why you're always hugging on me?

And you say, what's wrong with me? You just have all these questions. You don't know why you feel the way you do. You're happy one minute, you're sad one minute I want to kiss you one minute, I want to punch you the next minute. Yeah. And then you can say something to me. I'm fine. And then I just start crying. Right.

I'm not gonna say anything. I might get punched.

You know, I read a statistic that said between 6 and 7,000 women enter it a day. Not a mall.

I read a statistic.

Not a spa.

Listen.

But menopause.

I read a statistic where 6 to 7,000 men living with those women going through depression also. So we've got to talk about both sides of this issue.

The struggle is real.

The Hormones with the woman, the pill with the man that pharmaceutical companies need to make.

Yeah.

All kidding aside, how's it affected you? You're through with it, right?

I don't know. I don't want to test it. I want to keep getting my hormones because when I don't have my hormones, I start having hot flashes again. So when my hormones. I'm on the back end of my hormones, I start feeling really bad. So clearly I'm not through with it.

What's that H stand for? Hope. Tell them what I did on the plane. Tell them what I did.

What? Okay. I have a necklace that has a C on it. And so the little diamonds on the little diamonds on it. So I was getting on an airplane and the stewardess said, oh, I love your necklace. What does that C stand for? And I wanted be like, you're. You're an idiot. I mean, you're the stewardess. You see my last name? Here we are, buddy. I didn't say that.

I answered her.

So Ron said. Immediately. Ron said, cash. I said, no, it doesn't.

It's Quirin, her cash pendant, and started wearing an H. And I asked me what that stood for. I said, that stands for honorarium. So she has one that stands for cash and one that stands for honorarium.

I think I'm doing really good to be smiling, still smiling with all of his digs and punches. Is that my horrible.

I want to say, I think you. I haven't seen you have many of those symptoms. And that's where our guest is going to be introduced in a moment. Who's helped with that. And maybe to take any taboo away from it for the Christian community that may look down on it in any way. But the fact is, I think you managed it pretty well. I remember when they started, when all your symptoms started. But you did in some ways had some things in your body because of a hysterectomy. Can I talk about it? That just caused you to bottom out. And at one of the lowest points of your life, when we were really trying to minister to you and find out, okay, something has definitely happened. And we were looking at kind of a spirit, soul and body, a holistic approach. Yeah, we are Christians. Yeah. We believe God. Yeah. We were praying. But also I said, I want to take you and get you looked at.

Because some things are just natural. Some things are just natural has nothing to do with a demon.

Everything is not a spiritual problem. There are some people that think everything is a spiritual problem within our faith. But the fact is, there are Some times where there's just some stuff going on that's totally natural.

Right.

And the fact is, the first time you had your blood work looked at the doctor, I mean, I remember being in the room in 15 seconds, he said, I already see two or three numbers that could just by themselves throw you into a full blown depression. And it was at that time we realized I was at 40. I was at 40. We realized that you had had a lot of your equipment taken from your body, but there had been nothing to replenish those losses.

At 35, I got a partial hysterectomy. And so that means I was left with my ovaries. And the doctor never mentioned anything. I guess maybe because of my age. 35 years old, too, Whatever. I guess he was just going to wait till, you know, till she falls apart and she'll show up waving the white flag.

But honestly, your downward spiral happened there. That timeline somewhat connects. That timeline somewhat connects to after you had that hysterectomy. Nobody said anything about, okay, now this is going to throw your body in.

All craziness or said, what to expect, or maybe be looking for this. Nobody ever talked to me about that. And then I remember at 40 years old, I remember sitting in the bathtub and came in there.

I remember that moment.

And I was just crying, looking down.

I'm worried about you because, Because I was watching the downward spirit. I was watching a very strong woman and that was attracted to me. That's one of the reasons I married. It's very strong, very lively, very passionate love life, woman. It wasn't fast, but it was just a slow deterioration and I'll never forget it. I walked up there, I don't know, and I was concerned about you. But hey, I'm a guy. I didn't know what the heck was going on, right? So I'm, you know, I'm praying for my wife. I love my wife. I'm. I'm trying to. I think I was pretty nice. Turns out I tried to minister to you, but the fact was I didn't have a clue what was happening. But I knew changes were taking place inside of you. And then I walked up there that night and you were taking a bath. I'll never forget it. And you looked at me and you did. You had the most manicy, mannequinly, whatever that word would be, look on your face. You said, I feel dead.

And I did.

You said, I feel dead. You said, I don't feel anything. And that's when I said, you know what we are Taking you to the doctor and we're going to find out what's going on.

The only way to describe it was I felt flatlined. I didn't have any highs, I didn't have any lows. Nothing excited me, nothing made me happy, nothing gave me joy. I was just blah. And life was just grim. And I just did. I felt dead.

Well, we got a lot to talk about.

Yeah, we do.

It's going to be interesting. I never thought my wife would drag me into a menopausal podcast.

Yes.

But the fact is, I'm glad to be here. There's some things.

There's some signals. There's signals.

Well, you can. We can talk about. Because now we recognize them.

Yeah. And that we're funny.

And I wish somebody would have told us.

So if this is you, listen. Weight loss, weight gain, irregular periods, sleep problems. Do you have irregular periods? Yeah, that's why you can't.

My cycle is not normal.

I knew it. Sleep problems, chronic acne. Do you have any of that?

I did.

Dry skin, hair loss, thin hair, memory fog, fatigue.

You had that terribly.

Yeah, but you think, you think, oh, that's just life. You know, I got three kids, we're running a worldwide ministry, want to sleep all the time. Memory fog, night sweats. Those are from the pit of hell. Those are a pure demon. Mood swings, depression. And like we said, that started for me at 35, 37, you know, years old. And I have been on hormone therapy for 13 years. And it's life changing. It's a game changer.

A game changer because it takes your. For those who may think this is taboo, it takes your body back to its creative order. It takes it back to the way it was meant to function in the first place. And so I've. I sat and watched a resurrection take place in hope. A lot of other things went in.

You know, the Bible says that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. And when we're talking about hormones and menopause, I think that just talking about the men are fearful because we're intricately and crazily made.

They're fearful at how wonderfully y' all are made. That's it. That's what it is.

That's it.

But you are. You are very intricately designed creatures as women, and we're going to talk about that further. Go ahead.

So before we go on and introduce our guests, I want to talk about our sponsor. Chime, chime, chime, chime, chime. I love, love, love, love, love chime. We've told you so many times before that. We love chiming. Why? Because they help us manage one of the most important commodities. And what is it? Our moolah.

Money. Money.

Our moolah baby. With listen. No money fees, no monthly fees, no maintenance fees or minimum balance fees. It's how banking should be. And when you need to access your money you can do so fee free at more than 60,000 in network ATMs at many locations like Walgreens, Seven Eleven, CVS and Listen. You can also send money to anyone even if they are not on Chime. Fee free for you and no cash out fees for them. Listen Chime. No monthly fees, no vibe killing fees. Sign up for a Chime checking account. It only takes two minutes. It doesn't affect your credit score. So get started@chime.com RonAndHope that's chime.com RonAndHope Chime is a financial technology company, not a bank. Banking services provided by and debit card issued by the Bancorp bank or Stride bank In a member's FDA FDIC out of pocket network ATM withdrawal fees apply except listen except at MoneyPass ATM at the 711 location and at any All Point or Visa Plus Alliance ATM. Other fees such as third party and cash deposit fees may apply. So go get you a checking account with no fees.

With Chime.com becoming popular, we love them becoming popular. Thank you Chime and thank you for everybody going out there and seeing what these guys can do for you. All right.

Dr. V is what we call her because you know Ron has problems with words and pronunciation because he's a country.

I don't say her name.

So she's Dr. Reshma Basinwalla. She is a boy board certified internist and anti aging and regenerative medicine specialist. She's in Oakland, California. She treats both men and women with a whole range of issues including hormone replacement therapy. She is the founder and the chief medical officer of Refine Anti Aging medicine anesthetics.

So Dr. V. Hey Dr. V. How are you doing?

Hi, nice to see you guys.

Hello.

Hello.

How are you doing today?

Busy, busy, busy, busy. But so happy to be here with you both.

Thank you for carving out a little bit of time for us today and letting us cut up for 10 minutes and be foolish while you were sitting there.

So tell they heard your beautiful resume but tell them what you do on the day to day.

Okay. I mean I'm really glad you invited me onto this podcast Hope because I think you know, the more we talk about this and the more we hear about this, it Becomes more mainstream. And I think there's just a lack of education around just natural changes. You guys kind of brought it up. You kind of framed it that way, that this is natural. And I think not knowing much, you know, women need to be prepared for it. And I think that there's just kind of a lack of preparation. Not knowing what to expect is what I think can like, cause just a lot of confusion and also rift between partners. You guys kind of shared a little bit about couples and long term couples and you know, because it kind of. You're not experiencing these symptoms like in an, you know, it's. You're not in an echo chamber.

You're. It's.

It like it affects the other person. And, and I definitely think that like. And the couples go through it together. Menopause. And there's a word for it too, Ron. It's called andropause, not manipause.

Did you like that?

That was cute. So andropause is like men go through it too. You know, as far as what I do, I mean, I am seeing patients who are coming to me with sometimes they've been bouncing around, you know, going to doctors, trying to figure out what's going on with them, wanting some treatments, but been told that, oh well, this is just natural. It's just aging. There's really nothing you can do. You just kind of live with it. And you know, so they, they're coming to me sometimes when they've really kind of been knocking on other doors and not getting the answers that they want and just suffering in silence a lot of times and just thinking that this is just kind of how life is. But. And so I see like women and men and for women, since we're talking about menopause, usually it's like onset of symptoms like hot flashes and night sweats. And those are in libido. I think these are like the main things that bring women in. Weight gains. Another one. Men usually come in because, you know, for men it's usually energy and libido. Those are the two big things for them. And also losing muscle mass, not being be able to put on muscle. So I see people who come in with these present with these kinds of complaints. And of course my process is to do testing and really understand kind of what's happening with their hormones because. And rule other things out too, of course. But I focus on hormones and using bioidentical hormones to, you know, just increase the levels. Because once the hormone level starts to decline, as you described hope, like what happened with you you know, it just affects how your body. Hormones affect how our body functions and how we feel. And when these levels start to decline, you can start experiencing very difficult symptoms. And depending on the person, it can be quite extreme. And so, yeah, that's what I do is just look at hormones and replace, bring them back to more youthful levels. So our goal really is not to overshoot or over treat people, but just to restore levels, bring them back to a level that you were at when you were younger and that really impacts how you start feeling. It really changes. It can be quite dramatic.

Let me ask you a question. I think we've seen in the last few decades, girls in particular start to develop quicker, you know, they bigger breasts than people had when we were younger and they just look, you know, more advanced. Are people hitting menopause earlier? Because when I remember growing up, I didn't hear anything about this. Or maybe it was just the taboo. Nobody talked about these things, things that seem like it happened later in life, like, at least like 50s or older. But it seems like it's women. Yeah. Like it's happening earlier. Now, is that true or no?

I do. No, I think it is true. I think that just the are. I definitely see that menopause is happening earlier. I even see men earlier, like even starting in their 30s and with these symptoms. And I think that it just has to do with kind of the lifestyle now, the diet, the lifestyle, more obesity, more stressful jobs. Like people are just aging differently than we did. I think probably when like my parents, you know, just. It was a different lifestyle. And I think now you do see that with the hormones and environmental estrogens and things like that, that I do see women more now in their 40s, you know, that are having perimenopausal symptoms. I get like women in their, like early 40s, 41, 42, they're still cycling, but they're starting to have some of these symptoms and their hormone levels are declining, you know, earlier.

Yeah, yeah, I agree. So when you. What should they look for? What should any of our listeners look for? And we've touched on some of these things where you say, ugh, I think maybe I need to go to see a doctor. But the first thing is the blood work, Right. Because everything's in the blood. You do the blood, the saliva testing. So what should they look for to if they're in their 40s or in their late 30s, to as red flags where they should go seek out a doctor like you.

Okay. Yeah, So I think it's a very There are specific symptoms and they're also seem very non specific, like energy. You know, a lot of times as. Because it's such a slow and gradual decline that happens as you age, people adjust. We just kind of adjust to the lower energy levels, adjust to, you know, gaining a little weight. Like these are all. They just seem very normal because it's happening so slowly and gradually. So it's never. I don't think that it's typically people don't. It doesn't hit them all one day or all in one year. It's usually this gradual change. But typically it's like energy is a big one. Fatigue is really one of the presenting complaints. It's just feeling tired all the time, not having the energy to do the things that they wanted to do, feeling like just the afternoon hits and they're just, you know, don't have the energy that they would like to have. Kind of losing that spark in life, sense of well being, decreased joy in life. Weight gain. Libido is another major indicator. Weight libido, recovery from exercise, feeling really sore the next day, not being able to put on muscle. These are all kind of signs that should alert people. And then of course the regular perimenopausal symptoms that women mostly go through, which are a hot flash every now and then. Or it could be quite frequent or night sweats or vaginal dryness.

Can you just be mean? Can you just be mean sometime?

That is a symptom.

It is. Mood is like a big one. Irritability, depression, anxiety, feeling rageful.

I'm just gonna zip my lips. Yeah, I'm just gonna.

He needs to zip them.

I'll zip my lips right there. Okay.

Yeah. I mean those are like the PMS symptoms really get magnified. You know, that being weepy feeling for no reason, you know, just nothing's really happened to trigger it. But you just feel, feel that way. Yeah, it can be really very, very difficult. Not just like, you know, for the person, but of course if they're in a long term relationship. I mean like it's. It's like it's experience to the couple experiences it together.

You share it. I'm sorry, I said you share all of these things.

Yes. And so I think it's a novel way of looking at things is looking at as a couple of paws because men and women are going through together even if you know, and men may have some symptoms as well, but it definitely affects the relationship and can cause rifts. Unless like you're understanding what's happening and you can you know, then have that empathy, you know, about what's actually happening.

Well, doctor, doctor, let me ask her this. Dr. B. I get bioidentical hormones from you and I've, I've told people, my friends, when they say well I have night sweats or I have no sex drive, blah, blah, I said, well have you tried hormone therapy? Bio. And they're like, what is that? I've never heard about it. It's not something that your gynecologist normally will talk to you about. Can you explain to the listeners what are bioidentical hormone pellets?

So bioidentical hormones are plant derived hormones. They're not synthetic. So up until, you know, I mean in the 50s and where a lot of the studies were done that talked about lack of safety around hormones and those have to do with synthetic hormones. Bioidentical hormones are made from plants. They're very safe, they're very effective. They're called bioidentical because they're the identical chemical structure of the hormones that we make. So it's exactly the same, which is different than a synthetic hormone, which usually animal derived product.

Right. And they're safe. Ron's got a caller.

My phone is never on. I don't know how that works.

I love that.

Go ahead.

That's the first time that's ever happened.

I mean my phone is never on. You know why? You know what? Because of our tire. We had to get a tire fixed today. Okay. I didn't cut it back off. Yeah, that's why it was on. I'm sorry.

Okay.

Anyway, you were, you were on a roll. Go ahead.

My question is because, you know people are going to want to know this because the other hormone synthetics, the creams and the estrogen patches and those types of things have, we've been told, you know, they can link to breast cancer, they can cause other problems. What about, what's the range in these bioidentical hormones? Are they safe?

The bioidentical hormones are very safe. They're very effective. I mean like all hormones, you know there is a risk. The main, there are risks to the hormones but there, but bioidentical tend to be much safer. There is really no study out there at the time, at this moment that shows that there any that they cause cancer or they recause cancer. So they're very safe, they're very effective. Of course we have to be monitoring these levels and that's kind of what's really important is seeing someone. It's a very specific type of Care seeing someone who understands how to monitor these levels, how often to monitor, making sure everything's in range and in check. So I think that's the main. That's the main thing that I want to get out there is that, yes, like, they are safe, but it has to be monitored.

Yeah. Like when you mean that when you say monitored. Ron and I have to get blood work done. If we come to you, I come to you. So I get my blood work done every three to six months. Right. And so. And you're so thorough in that. You're so. I mean, you'll sit down and tell me all these 1, 2, 3s, T, 3, 4, 5, 12, 14, 14, 16, all these different little numbers. And you explain it so well, and it all makes sense. I think that's so important.

What did you want to ask?

I want to try to maybe draw some men into this thing because number one there, I've been in the fitness community my whole life and did not know any of this existed.

Yeah.

I don't think there's misinformation. I think there's no information that it's not on a lot of people's radar. And then when they hear anti aging, I think they immediately say, well, that's something that only rich people can do because they think the price is so astronomically high. And that's just not the case.

It's not true.

It's just not the case. And so I will tell people I'm not going to tell them what. I don't want all my stuff out there. But I attend as well as Hope because when Hope, when I saw such a change in you, I'm like, you know what? I'm pretty beat myself. But mine kind of came through an intervention. I did notice as I was getting older, it was taking twice the effort to do the same amount of work. I did notice those things, but my two sons set me down one time, it was almost like an intervention and said, dad, we are tired of seeing you beat all the time because I'm grinding. I work long weeks. I work long days. I have a lot of responsibilities, and that's not going anywhere anytime soon. But the fact is, when I would get home at night, I was almost like a mummy. I had nothing left in my tank. And my sons are the one that put me on to dad, you might need to seek out some of these things yourself because they don't know how. If my body is that depleted of its chemicals and hormones, how am I going to sustain this pace that I'm Keeping. What would you say to the men out there who may want to be a tough guy and I don't need that kind of stuff or they're embarrassed. I'm going to keep my six, drive till I'm 150. You know, how would you kind of, what would you say to those guys to kind of pull down that wall and say, hey guys, I can help you too?

Well, I mean, I think we kind of started out saying that this was a natural thing. There's nothing that they're doing wrong. It's a natural thing that we go through as we age. Both men and women are aging. It's a natural part of life that you're going to this hormonal decline. And for men, as soon as, like as early as their 30s, they will start to lose 1 to 2% of their testosterone levels, start to decline. So like I said before, it's this really gradual change that happens. And so you don't. You adjust. Men just adjust. You think this is just your. But because it's such a slow taper, you don't really feel it so, so dramatically until, you know, maybe you're near in your like mid to late 40s and you start to really feel these effect like erectile dysfunction, libido, not being able to put on muscle, not being able to work out. Have the same like effective workouts that they used to starting to get a gut on them. You know, that's a big complaint too. Like the belly fat. Belly fat and sleep, sleep disturbance can be one of them too. So that those are usually things that are sign that something is, you know, change that's changing and that there's. That you don't have to suffer. I think that's the main message is that there are treatments out there. They're safe and effective and you know, you don't have to suffer in silence. And it's. The more we like talk about this and then it. That's natural, it's normal. And you know that, yeah, that there, there's treatment that's very effective. And the goal really is, you know, I think testosterone therapies had a negative connotation for a long time. There's some stigma around it. And I think it has to just do with some of the illegal stuff that people do, like growth hormone and steroids and designer steroids. And I think that kind of that, that's not what we're talking about. We're talking about something totally different. We're talking about like testosterone and replacing them and just to bringing your Levels to a level like when you were like younger, you're not going to feel 25 again, but you're going to. You know, we're trying to just turn the clock back a little bit and, and so that you can just. Because nowadays, you know, people in their 50s, like, they're living longer. They want to age gracefully. They want to still have that spark, they want to have that stamina, that figure. And this basically helps. That's what I think. I mean, this is the secret.

I think it is.

Yeah.

Dr. V, thank you so much for being with us. And listen, the listeners, tell them where you are, tell them how to get ahold of you. If they say, well, oh my goodness, sign me up. How can they find you?

I'm in Oakland. It's Refine anti aging medicine and aesthetics. They can Google it and go to my website, www.refineantiaging.com.

Awesome. Because we think you're awesome. We thank you so much for your investment into my life, into our life. And I know our listeners have loved you. Thank you. And I hope you have an awesome day.

Thank you.

Yes. So, Ronald.

Ronald. I'm invited to hang out. Menopause.

Menopause.

I can take this in.

The men all pause when I walk into the room. You remember that?

No, don't remember that one.

That's an old 80s song.

I don't remember that one. Yeah, I didn't listen to that kind of music.

You didn't? That's skating rink music.

I listened to Gaither.

No, you did not.

Homecoming, stuff like that.

I did the hemp heels.

I listened to Gaither, Homecoming and things like that.

Got it.

You remember that? Yep. Sandy, Patty.

Sandy, Patty.

Arno Harris.

Oh, my.

Okay, so come on, let me tell you where we are. Spirit side.

Yes.

Men number one, you need to sign up for our marriage conference because I'm going to tell you the information that is thrown out and the way it's designed, I think it's one of the best of its kind. I don't care if it is one that we do. I'm very proud of it. And the things that we have learned, the things we have studied to package it in such a way that it's just an explosive weekend that can really help people in the next season of their life. Having said that, one of the things the Bible says in one Peter, I want to say chapter three. I should have looked it up before I come in here, is it says for the men to dwell with her with knowledge. God put the burden on the man to understand the woman. I make a lot of little jokes. Men are simple. Women are complicated. Why does he not say men live with him with knowledge? Because there's not a lot to understand. Men are much more simple creatures. Women are much more delicately put together. And hormone and hormone balances have a lot to do with that. What does it mean to dwell with her with knowledge? God has put the burden on. On me to understand you right, men. Her body is on a cycle. Yours is not. There are times during that cycle when some things are better than it is. At other times, we'll just leave that right there. There are some things that really don't cross her mind. At other times, to us, it's rejection and it's personal. And this, that and other. She is on a cycle. She is on a. We are not. We are to understand that she's on a cycle. Biologically, she's on a cycle with her womanhood. She's on a cycle sexually. Everything about her is cyclical. And if there's ever a delicate imbalance of that, here again, God puts the burden on the man to understand. I don't know how you would grade me during those years, because there's just a whole lot of knowledge.

I didn't know all the stars. Okay, you get A plus.

But the fact is, I remember you really weathering some pretty bad days. And I would. I'd come to you and I'm like, I don't know what you're going through, but talk to me. You know, let me see what I can do to help. Ladies, it's very important that you give him time to get it. I think you think sometime men get you. They. You look at your man and say, you just don't get it, do you? He's like, no, he doesn't get it. He really doesn't. And I think it's. You need to talk, you need to communicate.

It's like trying to expect a man to understand having a baby. He'll never understand it. He'll never understand this side.

My body does not go through those seasons, and my body does not go really through a menopause.

Menopause is when you stop. When you pause ministry, when you pause it, when you stop ministry. And I think that has a huge. It's just so much bigger than stopping a cycle. It's a season change. It literally is a whole life season change. You're no longer childbearing, so you feel like you're less than a woman. You feel like I'm getting old. It is just A whole psychological. Did you struggle with season change? Yes.

Really?

Yeah. You feel like, you know that you felt like.

Like you, like you were having, like.

I'm not a young, vibrant woman anymore, you know, like that season is over. But, you know, I think it's. Once you embrace it, you don't. You don't try to avoid it. You don't get stuck in it. It's kind of like. Kind of like death and tax. You can't avoid it.

It's a part of life.

You just got to embrace it.

We're almost at our time. I would like to just tell. I have literally hoped. I remember one in particular was the largest giver in our church on the east coast for years, and they retired and moved away after he sold his business. Wonderful people still remember them to this day. I remember his wife was going through menopause and they had a wonderful marriage. They were strong. You know what I'm talking about. He walked in my office one day with tears in his eyes.

Well, he didn't know how to help her.

Exactly. He walked in, he said, I don't know what to do, but my house has shifted and changed to. I walk in every day and don't even know what's going on or who this person is. I don't think every woman's season change is that dramatic, but there are some times where I need to tell the woman, woman, you're not losing your mind. And I need to tell the man, she's not losing her mind.

Yeah, it's a season. It really is. It's a season change. And I think when I embrace that and I got help and I realized this is a season change for me, you know, during this season is when you become an empty nester. So everything changes for the woman. Yeah. In that season. But you know what? The truth is, I know so many women in their 50s who have embraced it instead of fell into the trap of it. They've become bestselling authors, they have gone back to school, they have changed careers. They're like, you know what? Now they're living their best life.

The end of a thing is the signaling of the beginning of a thing. So if one season is closing, another season is opening up. And we just wanted to, you know, when we took this podcast journey, I know we were going to go in uncharted waters. These are things I'm not going to talk about in a pulpit. But the thing is right here, we can just talk about life behind the scenes. And the fact is, just because me and you have Reverend in front of our name does not mean we did not weather these very same things that everybody else is weathering. And some of ours were quite drastic.

And Proverbs 31 says this. Proverbs 31, 25. It reminds us that strength and dignity are her clothing. And she what at the future? She smiles at the future. So no matter what stage you're in, in this, if you're just starting this season of your life, if you're in the middle of it, if you're questioning, man, you know, I feel like I'm losing it. All my kids are gone. I'm looking at my husband. I don't know who he is. I don't know who I am. You know what? If you're in Christ, you can smile at the future.

You can, in the words of Denise Boggs, you can go through these changes horribly or you can go through them gracefully. And what I'm praying is if you are there or approaching those points, that God will give you the grace to go through these changes gracefully. Because Christians should have the ability to be pliable and have the ability to adapt. That should be one of the overriding factors and characteristics of walking in maturity with God. We got to get these folk out of here. This has been fun. Very interesting. Yeah, I tried to make it fun and I think my joking comes with the uncomfortability of a man sitting here talking about a woman's cycle.

Well, when we found out that you go through it, what does she call it?

Andropause and something animal.

Pause.

Andropause. I forget. Something like that.

Animal paws. I call it menopause and menopause.

So anyway, if you're feeling these things, get rid of the taboo of feeling like I don't want to ask for help. Check out some of these anti aging methods, because I'm telling you, bioidentical experience. Yeah, they're not synthetics any longer and they can really increase the quality and vitality of your life. Let's get out of here.

Thanks for being here.

Blessings.

Love you guys.