Look To The Ant | Ron + Hope: Unfiltered

Talk to 'em, baby.

Hey, everybody, it's Ron and Hope Carpenter. Real, raw, relevant. So glad you're here today.

And look, I'm just glad to be with you.

I'm here 2 weeks in a row.

I'm just glad to be with you. Are you? Yes. I miss you when you're gone.

I miss you too.

Miss you when you're gone. So give us your update on your parents.

About the same, baby. It's about the same.

About the same.

It's about the same. So he's— the part of his brain that was affected, it lowers his inhibitions.

Yeah, they said it's the part of your brain that deals with the filter and inhibitions.

So he has no filter. And woo! So if he thinks it, he says it. If he feels it, he reacts. It's a lot. So pray for my mother who has to be cooped up in there with him. In the line of fire. Yes, 24/7.

In the line of fire. I don't think he's— we probably need to send him to positive confession school right now, don't we?

He said, yeah, I know about that. I told him, I said, Daddy, I said, you raised me, your favorite scripture was choose life. You know, all the power, you gotta be positive. He said, "Yeah, I know all that." He said, "But there ain't no hope for my depression." He said that yesterday. He said, "There ain't no hope for my depression." I said, "Daddy, you know better." Baby, you remember when I was doing the series on words?

Yes. And y'all got into it and you started talking to him about his mouth. He saw a little words. He said, "I got all that down." He said, "I got that down." Mm-hmm. The Bible says, "Whoever's tamed his tongue is a perfect man." So he thinks he's perfect.

So anyhow, yeah, we dealing with that still.

So me. No, your hair looks good.

It's a lot in life. My hair looks good.

Your hair looks good.

I washed it today.

You weren't in staff meeting yesterday when we were talking about dry shampoo. I got a full lesson from my staff ladies on dry shampoo. What is dry shampoo? What is in it?

I don't know, Ron. I've never looked at the ingredients.

Do you use it?

Yeah, every now and then. I sometimes use dry shampoo the day I wash my hair, 'cause it kind of makes it a little—

But what is it?

Like, has more texture. I don't know.

It's like— How does it sop up oil?

I think it's like powder. It's like spray powder.

You're spraying powder?

Yeah, you can even take baby powder and put it in your hair.

Well, how can a dark-headed person spray it in their hair?

Ron, they have colors. They have different colors of dry shampoo.

So you can have brunette powder and black powder and red powder?

Yes. It's a great thing.

So basically, it's an excuse—

To not wash your hair. That's right. Yeah. No, it's not to be gross. It makes it where it's not gross.

It's not attractive if we hug y'all and it's a stinky head.

No, it has good odors in the dry shampoo. It has— Scents. Coconut, tropical, all of that.

I've never sprayed powder in my hair anytime. Did you spray it in our kids?

No, they didn't have it back then.

Why don't we just wash your hair and clean it instead of stinking?

You don't need to wash your hair every day as a woman, Ron.

But I have to, so what makes you different?

'Cause yours is short. You have little bitty nubs.

I like my hair. I like my hair. I had a waitress in a hotel the other day, she said, "I wanna know who does your hair." Oh my gosh. And Chaz was sitting there, he's busted out laughing. Chaz was sitting there, she said, "I wanna know who does your hair." What does that even mean? She said, "Your hair's gorgeous." I said, "I have not been complimented on my hair since the early 2000s." Ron, I doubt she was trying to really compliment your hair.

She was probably flirting with you. No.

I don't think she was flirting with me. You don't?

But you said the woman at the desk of the hotel, or who was it? You said there was a woman.

No, it was that same woman.

Oh, it was her.

It was that same woman.

But see, you told me she was flirting with you.

She's flirting with Chaz.

No, you told me.

'Cause Chaz is very handsome.

That she was flirting with both of y'all?

She was working as hard as she could. Was she? Yes. She was working as hard as she could. She said, "Who does your hair?" She says, "Your hair is gorgeous." And I looked at her like, "Really?" You know, when you get my age, nobody compliments your hair unless you have like locks of beautiful hair, old in life. The guy who we took over was like that, wasn't it, Dick? Dick Bernal, 80 years old, head full, full of silver hair. So I'm jealous.

My daddy's got long hair now. Speaking of my daddy, he let his hair grow out and he said he looks like Kenny Rogers.

Just leave that right there. All right. Anyway, we wanna talk. You had an inner circle. Hope has an inner circle, which is, do you call it a coaching community or you call it, okay, it's a coaching community. I just wanted to make sure I say it like you say it. And I have had the privilege of maybe twice being invited on the Inner Circle.

That is not true. You've been on Inner Circle more than twice.

You have to be a part of an elite community to be invited to the Inner Circle. So yesterday I was invited to the inner circle, not the circle, the inner—

The sanctum.

—circle.

The sanctum.

And—

No, it's because this year we are studying the book of Proverbs and we were on— Proverbs 6. Let me let Matthew set it up.

Me and you got into a great discussion right there in front of your coaching community. And after it was over with, I'm like, baby, I really, I enjoyed going— We're dialogue. 'Cause you was throwing stuff in there, then I was coming back and throwing stuff, then something you'd say make me think about this, something I'd say make you think about that. And I looked at you and said, that would be great podcast information. So those of you that are in Hope Center Circle and you may watch the podcast too, you may stick around. We'll probably say it differently, 'Cause yesterday we were in teach mode. We're not in teach mode right now. We're in conversation mode. But after it was over with, I thought, "That's really good." Refer to the scripture that you were reading yesterday. Proverbs 6, wasn't it? Where it talks about the ant? Yes. Ronald. Actually, it talks about the ant, the badger, the spider.

No, it doesn't.

Not in Proverbs 6. No, it does in 30. Yes. Proverbs 30. But it's kind of the same material in Proverbs 30.

Find your glasses.

Okay.

Okay. Okay. Verse 6. 6. Read it for everybody. "Go to the ant, you sluggard." Well, the whole chapter is talking about what is folly, being foolish. It's describing a foolish person versus a wise person. So, it says, "Go to the ant, you sluggard. Consider its ways and be wise. It has no commander." No overseer or ruler, yet it stores its provisions in summer and gathers its food at harvest. How long will you lie there, you sluggard? When will you get up from your sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest. And why? Poverty will come on you like a thief and scarcity like an armed man. Can you—

you got enough battery to leave that out? I wanna refer to that. We've never wanted our podcast to become a teaching, but we always said we did want it to be informative. And so, I just want some dialogue and conversation on that. I think one of the great things we have done, because I wanna talk more about some of the things we do right, because all of our failures have been well chronicled. You wrote about 'em. They're out there for the whole world. We've used 'em as a testimony. But yes, you know, mistakes have been made and we've had to clean up messes. But we've also done some things right. And we don't talk about it enough 'cause we don't wanna self-promote, but there's some things that we've done right and I would do it again the exact same way. And I think the one, one, One thing that is definitive about you and I, not just individually, baby doll, but if I may, as a couple, is our diligence. Right. Hard workers. You know, we had some time where you weren't at your best and we had to stop and we had to fix the things in our lives that were broken. Okay, and I guess everybody needs a break and needs a time where they can go back and repair whatever, that needs to be repaired. But for the most part, and I'm talking about not just the time, I mean, even when we were dating, the 39 years that we've been together.

And even before that, your teenage years, my teenage years, we've always worked. We've always had a job. My first job, I was 13 years old, and I have never had a season.

Now, were you being paid under the table? How did you get a job when you was 13? Supposed to be labor laws. But maybe not in Calhoun Falls.

Abbeville and Calhoun Falls.

Yeah, maybe not have labor laws.

They run it different.

See, I worked on farms and they didn't care. And they pay you cash at the end of the day. What they'd really do is work you all day long and hand you $15. And you was 11, 12 years old working like a dog. They give you enough money to go to Burger King. But that's the way, you know, they kind of did it. And they got a lot out of young boys 'cause everybody needed a little extra money and we'd work hard.

So our whole life, as long as we can remember, has you been independent, diligent, not slothful.

Making my own car payments. Yeah, hard workers. Paying a lot for my clothes and my own dates and things like this. Mom and Daddy were very good to me, but my mom and dad were limited, especially during those days. Mom and Dad didn't really start doing better till after we started doing better. And those were the best days of our lives and the best days of ours. But it really has, it's diligence is my definition, and I do mean mine, I didn't get it from a book, is doing a little thing a long time till something big happens. Why do we have a generation, I think, that overlooks the little things? They want big.

Yeah, I think it's the social media age and the quick, easy age of—

Removing process. Yeah, removing process. Removing process.

There's so many options out there that we didn't have, so we had to make it happen.

I was telling, me and Hope were talking, we do like to talk generationally. I'm straight about the baby boomers and baby busters and Gen X, that's my generation. We had our problems. I've been pretty strong on the millennials about what I see as their deficiencies. Gen Z, the Bible says you can't blossom until you plant. And Gen Z won't plant because they always want their options open.

They're always looking for something better.

All my praise and worship leaders wanted to be on staff until Gen Z. They wanna be contract.

So that they can float around.

So they can float. They don't wanna plant, become a part of a great team. Let's build something great. Let's build a sound in this house that shakes this region. No, but this is, I'm speaking in generalities. These are generalities, not just in church. This would be generalities of a generation. They wanna keep their options open. My turnover is in Gen Z. You know what I'm talking about? We have a lot of turnover in that area.

Because of options.

Because of options. They keep the options open. Hard to plant. They see that, they see that there's too many things I could be doing than to just be doing this. And so—

Of course, hey, Before we go on, we need to talk about our ad. Talk about a little option here. Is this Green Chef time? Yes, it is. So, you know, we have tried things, I know I have, so many times in my life. This is the one, you know, this is what's gonna help me get better. Super strict, hard to keep up with, and honestly, most of 'em don't last. Quick fixes weren't just sustainable for us. That's why we love Green Chef. We're fed diets Green Chef, they never fail. They deliver real food and recipes that make healthy eating so easy and actually lasting. It's been one of our favorites. It felt effortless and like we were eating without overthinking it. With Green Chef, every week you get over 40 recipes made with organic produce, responsibly sourced proteins, and nothing you cannot pronounce. Meals come pre-portioned and ready in minutes. Want guidance beyond the plate? They include free unlimited one-on-one nutrition coaching that helps you stay on track. I feel better. I'm eating the right meals and real meals, and it actually fits into my life and our budget and our lifestyle without being overwhelming. So head to greenchef.com/50ronandhope and use code 50RONANDHOPE to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for 2 months. That's code 50, Ron and Hope at GreenChef.com. All right. Well— Quick fixes. Somebody quick fixes. Diligence.

Diligence doing a little thing a long time. I preached a while back, the Bible talks about the working of a miracle. The Bible doesn't say miracle, it says the working of miracles. Sometime a miracle is immediate and instantaneous. And when we think of miracle, that's usually the first thing we think of. But there's also a miracle or a breakthrough of some type that comes at the end of a process you've been faithful to complete. And so I would tell a generation that may struggle in this area, there are really no shortcuts. You might think there are, there's not. Because the process is what allows you to sustain the blessing. It's what God did in you during the climb that allows you to stay on top of the mountain. Made you appreciate the climb. Made you appreciate the hard work. Yes, that's right. You press, you give energy.

That's how he tells us to run our race. He says, "Run it with perseverance." So all the things—

and if God has attached a process to any miracle you need, it's because he knows there's something in the journey that you're deficient in, and the journey will build that in you. Because God don't want the blessings to come and go. I don't wanna get to where God has brought us to today and do something dumb. And lose everything. I want to be able to sustain the blessings that God gives us. So, the fact is, diligence— look at the ant, you sluggard. The ant— no, no, the thing I brought to the table, you brought preparation to the table, I brought this to the table. It says, "They have no master." I think that is so— That's a lot to unpack. In a day where everything Everybody needs to be inspired. Yeah. In a day where everybody needs motivation, do you know what a motivational speaker can demand? I have dabbled in that world a little bit. I stuck my toe in it. Hope, there's companies that pay these guys $300,000 for 30 minutes. To speak. They'll bring them in. I've had John Maxwell tell me, what Delta paid him to come speak. I mean, it's obscene to be a motivational inspirational speaker. But look at the ant. It has no captain, it has no coach, it has no teacher, it has no leader. Look at the ant, you sluggard. Something on the inside of it is its own motivation. Yeah.

You know why it's its own motivation? Because it is— knows that if he doesn't do it, he will not have food tomorrow. He's working today to prepare for tomorrow. He's not working today for today. The Bible says that he is working today to prepare for tomorrow, because what he's eating on today, he worked for yesterday. So he knows, "If I don't work today, I don't eat tomorrow." The Bible says to walk circumspectly.

I break it down. Root word of circumspect is circumference. Root word of circumference is circle. Walk, that means the way you live your life and make your decisions. Live your life and make your decisions with this in mind. Life is a circle. That means decisions, seed goes out and harvest comes back around. Seed goes out, Harvest comes back around. In other words, the decisions you make at some time will come back around and revisit you. So one of the things I've tried to do, and I think you and I have done it together, I try to walk and make my decisions with something other than the present in mind. Right.

That's what the ant does. The ant makes today's decision with the future in mind, not with the present in mind.

And if you live, one of the big things that this generation says is be present, be present, be present. Yes, I wanna be in the moment. When I'm with you, I want you to have my attention. I wanna look in them beautiful green eyes. I wanna seize every moment of the day. When I look at you, I wanna melt in them eyes. I wanna be right there present. But as a planner, I want you to go to sleep at night knowing Ron's got me. Right. Yes, God's got you, but I want you to know, Ron's got a plan.

It's talking about the ant. It says, "Consider the ant." So I would ask you to go and do a whole study on an ant because that is what the Word of God is telling us how wisdom operates is how an ant operates. And he says, "A little sleep, a little—" Then he describes the sluggard sleeping all the time. "A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest." It's void of purpose. It's inactive. What happens, it says, if you act like this, a person with no planning, a person who doesn't plan today for tomorrow, it says, "Poverty." Poverty— We've witnessed that. —will come on you like a thief and scarcity like an armed man. So, really, people who are living in poverty have not planned well. I mean, you gotta break it down.

Nobody wants to say that because we say, in this day and time, if anybody's in a bad place, we say they've been victimized by something. But the fact is, most of the difficult places Ron's there, Ron made decisions that put him there. And that is very unpopular, but that's the Bible.

It's sowing and reaping.

If you want to get better, you get better.

If you don't, you don't.

But here's the power of sowing and reaping. If I made a decision that put me in this place, I can make a decision that can pull me out.

That's what I just said. If you want to get better, you can get better.

Take your power back in your own hands and say, "Yeah, I screwed this up," which means, yes, you got the power to fix it. Because I may need grace for the harvest that I'm in, but I've gotta start sowing a different seed during a difficult harvest to ensure this harvest is not repeated. And so that's what the ant does. Also, the ant can't plan for tomorrow without understanding delayed gratification. Right. If it's storing up food, that means it's not eating it now.

It's not eating it right now. It could. He's storing it.

He could eat it, but he chooses not to eat it for another day. You were very gracious. You had some money you were talking about and how you wanted to do these things and you just wanted to make sure we was prepared for our future. And I looked at you And I said, "Baby," I said, "Do with that money what you wanna do with it." I said, "Because unless my plans fall apart," and I've had some fall apart, I said, "I got you." And I remember you just laying in the bed when I told you that and you just looked up at me like, "Yeah, I guess you do." I had some money from the sale of a house.

And I wanted to put it into an annuity. And that's fine. Which grows for lifetime retirement income. An annuity, if you don't know it, you can't outlive it. So whatever you put in, it grows. The way it's structured, once you become retirement age or whenever you wanna take it, you get that payment like a Social Security payment every month and you can never outlive it. And I was saying, I said, "Let's just make sure for our retirement that we've got some extra stuff coming in. Don't depend on everything." And you looked at me and you were like, "You can do that, but Hope, I've already planned." If you wanna do—

if you wanna use it another way, it's your money because I've got this in place. And unless the world comes unglued, you know, I've got a way for us to live when we're no longer doing all this. And so, I think that is the way of the end. He talks about the spider and other things in there, but I also wanna hit this delayed gratification. Hope, that is— would you say that's one of the most difficult disciplines?

I think it is for everybody.

I don't think there's anybody that was born liking delayed gratification.

No, we want what we want when we want it.

We do. So I'm gonna throw something at you. How do you develop that?

I think it's wisdom. I think it's maturity. But right, when I was a child, I talked like a child. I thought— I understood. And I understood. It's our thinking, acting, doing. So when I became a man, I put away that childish thinking. So when I became mature, I stopped— What does a child do? A child pitches fits. "I want ice cream 3 meals a day. I want to do what I want. I wanna hit you when I wanna hit you." That's childish, right? That's folly is bound up in the heart of a what? Child. A child. But what drives it far from 'em? Correction. Correction drives folly— Well, the Bible says, "The rod of correction." "The rod of correction drives folly far from a child." So, if we don't— We don't keep learning our lessons. We keep failing as adults. That means we're still acting in childish ways. So God has to keep correcting us.

Well, the Bible says God chastens those, disciplines those he loves. So when the children are in the house, they're the parent's responsibility. But when they become an adult, it's God's responsibility to chasten us. And wisdom—

He's trying to get that out of our heart.

Proverbs is the wisdom of God. It's God's wisdom.

It's doing life God's way.

It's life as God knows it. And so, I think it's good here to— when you were reading Proverbs 6, wisdom is contrasted with folly. It's not contrasted with dumb. Right. It's not contrasted with stupid. Yeah. It's contrasted with folly or foolishness.

It's not a lack of intelligence. Right.

Wisdom is contrasted with foolishness or folly, which is another word for it. And the Bible does say folly is bound up in the heart of a child. Pardon me, babe. Folly is bound up in the heart of the immature.

Yeah. Okay?

And the Bible says that a foolish son is a father's shame, but a wise son is a father's glory. And so, Basically what God is saying here— what's that? I'm gonna find something.

Keep talking. You gonna use Google or chat?

No, neither.

Use my notes from last night.

I think what we need to let everybody know is wisdom. Mike Murdock always said, "Wisdom is the ability to determine difference." Difference in a person, difference in a countenance, difference in a moment, difference in a decision. The ability to determine difference and to honor people and honor moments and honor times for the difference that they bring. When you look at the ant, the ant knows what season it's in. I'm in the season of gathering. I'm in the season of storing. Then it gets cold in winter. I'm in the season of eating what I gathered. I think a real wise person understands their season. I don't go in my garage and try to outlift my two sons anymore. You know, in your season. I'll be 58 next month. Okay? 58 years old. They're 30 and 32. My joints need something totally different than what their joints need. And so, I think wisdom, again, by the aunt, is knowing your season. You know, if you're 77 and you're wearing miniskirts trying to get guys, you know, you're a little bit out of your season. And so, You need to understand what season you're in because that's the ant. He gets where he is. He knows where he's at.

I can't find it. What you looking for?

Just go ahead. You had a thought in your mind, didn't you? But delayed gratification, internal motivation. I mentioned it. Let me unpack it a little bit and we'll wind it down. I've said this in church many times, Hope. You know, I come in here on Sunday and one of the things I wanna do, not the only, is I wanna inspire people. Had a guy years ago say, "You know why I come to this church?" I don't know that it was a good motive, but it did speak to me. He said, "I like it because you set yourself on fire and we get to watch you burn." But I said, "Nobody," you know, angels do not visit our house—

and make you get up out of bed—

on Sunday morning with trumpets at 5:30 in the morning saying, "This is the day the Lord hath made, Ron Carpenter. Get up and rejoice and be—" No.

That don't happen. No, you wake up sleepy.

I wake up tired. I go get my coffee and what do I do?

That's okay. Anyway.

The Bible says that David encouraged himself. I believe motivation by the mature is something you stir within yourself. If somebody else has to come stir it, my life's gonna be bipolar.

That's a— what's the word I'm looking for? That is a— that's immaturity. If somebody has to motivate you, that you— what do we have to do to our children? "Come on, you gotta get up. Come on, it's time to go to school. Let me scratch your back." That's childish.

But now, nobody comes and wakes us up.

Nobody scratches my back now. Well. Well, you do sometimes. Nobody comes and, "You gotta get up, baby." You do not. Well. Ron.

Nobody cooks your breakfast. Well. Ron. Well, nobody gets your cup warm.

That's because you like to serve me. 'Cause you're a good husband, right?

Well, I try to be. But it's true. You gotta find that somebody— this is totally secular, this is not biblical. I saw somebody the other day interviewing somebody and said that knew Elon Musk, that knew Steve Jobs, that knew Bezos, knew Zuckerberg, and the list goes on. The guy from NVIDIA, all these guys. And he says, "These guys are changing the world." He says, "What do they have in common?" Listen to what these guys— He said, "They have no off button." He said, "I know each of those men." He said, "They have no off button." I don't think that's healthy. But one thing about those who achieve great things in life, they are self-motivated. Because they found something within themselves that they can light their own fire. I've had terrible days. You've had terrible days. But then when I get the mic, Hope, I have a job to do.

So it's the contrast between the lazy, that's what the sluggard is. Come motivate me. Yeah, it's the lazy versus the ant, which is self-motivated. And the ant doesn't miss a meal because he's already prepared. The ant doesn't miss anything. The sluggard says, "We'll be brought to poverty," because he's lazy. It is what it is. So, if you wanna join in on this wisdom journey with us, join the Inner Circle. Go to HopesInnerCircle.com. HopesInnerCircle.com. You join in.

And let me end with this. Your day yesterday was crazy. It was— It was— Crazy. It was crazy yesterday.

Yes. And it is today. And it is tomorrow. I know it.

And because you texted me a minute ago.

Appointment to appointment to appointment to appointment.

That's the way I like it. And when you— But when you sat down in front of that inner circle, you got a job to do. Yeah. And you found the light.

I was prepared.

You were prepared. You were ready. You're sitting there. Your makeup's good, your face is powdered, your hair is done. Was I tired? Your smile's on your face. Was I tired? Yes.

Yes. You're tired. Did I wish I could have canceled yesterday?

But I watched you. Yes. But I watched you.

But I didn't.

And it was like that day, I mean, that day we had driven all the way across the state of Florida and Georgia and back here. And I had a meeting at 5 o'clock with my Connect sons and my fellowship. And we were like 2 minutes till. Yeah, but we made it happen. And my sister-in-law, "Let me just count." No, no.

But see, that's another characteristic of an ant. Have you ever watched an ant, a line of ants, when they're carrying a piece of food on top?

And if you throw a rock in their path.

And they're carrying a piece of food on top or they hit a little rock or they come up on something, what do they automatically do? They divert and find another— Another way. Way. That is another characteristic. You don't just let stuff stop you. You find another way.

Because there's always a way. A way, yeah.

Always a way. It's been great.

I tell my staff all the time.

Go read Proverbs. Go read Proverbs 6. Go do a study on that.

You know what one of my mentors, Mike Murdock, used to say? Read a chapter of Proverbs every day.

Yeah. I love Proverbs.

Read a chapter of Proverbs every day. Well—

We're learning so much in Inner Circle doing Proverbs this week. This whole year. We are. All right, it's been great. I love you guys. Ron and Hope Carpenter, real, raw, relevant.

See you soon.