Ron + Hope: Unfiltered - Family Edition

Hello, everybody. Here we are, Ron and Hope. Unfiltered, real raw and relevant.

I can't see those three words together.

So now, you see he has a bowl of cereal right now.

It's really not. It's really. It smells amazing.

Like Froot Loops, right?

It does. It smells just like Froot Loops. And I can't have Froot Loops anymore because I'm kind of lactose intolerant. But it was good in the day.

You are not lactose intolerant. But anyway, we are here today. It's exciting. We have a family addition. We have our children and our in laws who are our children. So we are so excited to have.

Everybody here introduce everybody to our podcast.

Sure. All right, let's start with this little couple right here. Who are you guys?

So Chase. Chase is our oldest.

I'm Jordan. I am this one's wife.

This is our oldest. This is Erskine. Chase. Erskine Chase.

Go by Chase Carpenter.

He goes by Chase. Yeah.

And so the baby who did not require much rest.

No, she didn't.

Yep. No, he did not require much rest.

He rocked our world in a major way.

Still kind of that way.

Yeah.

I was about to say, but he was so cute.

He had a mullet.

Oh, he had a long, curly mullet.

He had a curly mullet. He did. And he had shoes that lit up on the bottom.

He stomped them everywhere.

And he stomped them everywhere to make them light up.

Yeah, he did. This side, this side.

We have my. Oh, we have my youngest. We have my baby girl, Chandlern, her husband Drew, and two grandbabies.

That's Brian Andrew.

Two grandbabies.

He's professional guitarist.

Everybody here actually works on the staff some way or another. And then we got Chaz, my middle son, and he's joining us by Zoom. He said, why ain't he in the room? It's because we have two coasts and. And we're on the east coast, we're on the west, and he's still on the west coast at our campus there. He's project management. And me and Hope are on the east coast where all the rest of our family serves on staff members, whether it be creative arts, pastoral care, special events. We got everybody doing a little bit of everything.

Everybody just pitches in.

So this is our family and we wanted to get together. And my wife made me nervous when she told me we were going to do a family event. I said, you know what? I don't want everybody to know where we screwed up and did wrong and weren't any good and everything else. But we're going to try to be real wrong and what, Jake?

And irrelevant.

Irrelevant. We do not want to be irrelevant people.

Okay, so you're leading this leader.

I'm going to lead this chief. I'm the chief here. So let's talk about growing up in the Carpenter household. Let's talk about it.

Well, I didn't grow up in the household.

No, you didn't.

But these three did a little bit.

Little bit. You did live with us a little while. I mean, I did.

I did.

You basically did. Cause you entered our household at 15.

16.

16.

And I was 16.

I was 15. She was 16.

Okay.

It was a young love moment. And I did. And I moved in.

Yeah, she did.

Yeah, I did.

So, Chase, tell us about growing up. What's some of your fun memories? We were talking about some of these earlier. We were sitting here laughing, talking about all this fun stuff. What about when Chaz stabbed you?

That's a good one right there.

Yeah, I don't know about a stab. It was a good slice.

A good slice?

What'd he do it with?

It.

Was it a slice? We were sitting in that little extra room. We had them. Yeah.

And remember those old things that would stand up and you'd have a bowl and you'd have foam, like water and like fog come out of it?

That's what it was.

But it was broken.

It was a meditation bowl.

That's what it was. A meditation bowl. So, Chase, tell us what happened.

I mean, we were just sitting there on the couch, and then I can't remember what I was doing, but Chaz was beside me.

You were minding your own business?

Yeah, Chaz was beside me, and he had a broken piece of glass, and it was like. Had a little hook on it. And I just remember him just going right to my left arm. And I looked down, and all of a sudden, blood just started.

I was messing with it. I was looking at the steam, and I picked up a little. It was like one of them little marble things, and it had broke. And then I remembered it was him and someone else sitting on the couch.

Why'd you cut it?

I was playing with it, and I sat down and, I mean, it just. It took him like that.

It was just a nerve.

I mean, it was a long time ago. And like I said, I wasn't really paying attention. All I know is that.

But what happened after that?

So we told you.

Well, I just came down. I just came downstairs, and I remember blood was just coming off my fingertips, and I was like, mom, dad, Chaz I was like, chaz cut me. And then I kind of stared. And then I saw Mom's face. She was like, oh, my God, you.

Still have a massive scar.

Yeah, I still have a scar, but I just remember going downstairs. I'm not sure if Chaz got in trouble or what, but they put a gauze and then wrapped it. And then we went to the boat and RV show.

He said, then we went to the boat and RV show.

Look, look, y'.

All.

I still have a scar running up the side of my finger right here. Because me and Chase was at Sports Club with dad, and he said he'd give us something if we raced to the car. If we raced to the car, we win something. Money or whatever. Me and Chase took off. And as soon as I got to the car, my finger got caught in the front of the Suburban Grill. And it just. As I kept running, it just peeled the skin right off my finger. And I remember right after that, the new. The church building on Haywood Road was still being built, so me and Chase were little. So right after that, I mean, Dad. I don't know what dad did. He just put, like, a T shirt on or something.

I taught my children to be tough.

We don't go to the hospital very much here.

No, we don't. Chase. It. It was the worst pain he'd ever been in in his life. Walking around the boat show. It was throbbing and squirting out blood. And dad was looking at boats.

My face didn't say it, but inside I was hurting.

He lost about a pint of blood that day.

Chandler, what about you?

What's some of your memories?

I just. I grew up with two older brothers. It was just.

It was vicious.

Yeah, the knee drop. We've got to talk about the knee drop.

Who knee dropped you?

Chas knee dropped me on the trampoline.

Chaz.

Chaz hurt us.

Come on, man.

Chaz hurt us.

Come on, man.

Chaz played too much Mortal Kombat. Okay.

Like, Chaz played Tekken all day. Then he wanted to do it to Chamberlain.

Yeah, he had to practice.

He didn't want to do it with me, though.

No, he didn't.

I know my voice has gone it.

So what would he. Knee drop. How did he do that?

We were on the trampoline, and we were like. We would wrestle and fight and all kinds of stuff. And I just remember him being like, hey, Ken. And he'd call me, like, Ken or Kenny G my whole life like that. The saxophone player. He called me Kenny G. So he'd Be like, hey, Ken, Kenny, come over here. He was like, I wan. And so I was little. Like, I'm only, like, five, two. Okay? So he picks me up, raises me over his head, and he gets on one knee and just drops me on.

My back, like, straight to his knee, like, koe.

Yeah.

Chaz got up and said, you're all.

Right, Kenny KO he got up and said nothing. He never checked on me. Got up and said nothing. Just ran off the trampoline going.

And I was there.

Like, I was Kenny. He was moving.

Yeah.

He was Brett, Michael, and Buck9.

Chaz, I gotta ask you, where did you come up with these names? Like, how did you come up with this?

I'm pretty good.

It's one of them things where you just. You look at someone and you think for a minute, and it just comes to you.

They just look like something.

They look like they should be that name.

So, Chaz, look at Jordan. What should she be?

You can't see us.

Can't put him on the stalk.

Just think about.

Think about Jordan, what she's doing. It has to be spontaneously. Okay.

It's been 11 years.

I would call Jordan UFC.

No, he calls Jordan Savage. Tyson or Tyson.

Yeah, Jordan and Remy.

Jordan's a strong one.

And Drew's sitting over here quiet because he's like, I'm not even sure I want to be a part of all this anymore.

Drew's thinking, I sound lucky to have Chandlern here.

I know, right?

Hey, Drew's just a glass.

Lucky Chandler made it all the way to you.

Drew's like, I have no scars.

No.

He's thinking of all the things he did to Brianna, his sister. Were you vicious?

Oh, yeah. Yeah. I threw rocks.

I threw rocks.

Oh, gosh.

But she was pretty vicious, too, right?

All right. In our family, we believed in spanking. Chase, do you remember a bunch of spankings?

Well, Chase, did you get your.

It was like. It was a big thing. Whenever we would get. We'd get spanking. No. Cause most of the time. Most of the time, that was when.

Y' all would come together.

But most of the time, there were times, a lot of times, where I got spanked, like, by myself.

We'd have corporate spankings.

The ones that I remember was when me and Chaz would have to get spanked together, and my dad would bring us in a room.

Oh, God.

And he'd, like, make us, like, sit down. He'd make us, like, sit down.

Sit down.

He'd give us the little. The little spiel.

Yeah.

And then he'd be like, all right, Chase, you're up. So Chaz would have to sit there and watch me get spanked. And we'd be sitting there, Dad's wearing us out. And me and Chaz were sitting there. Chad were just laughing the whole time.

And that would make me mad, and.

That would make him more mad. And then, yeah, it was.

What about Chaz, when he would get spanked? You remember him pulling his feet up?

He was a rope. He was a rope.

Dad would do. Dad would do.

Well, the thing is, is over time, you learn countermanage.

He would do side laterals to hold him up.

So spanking, that was your story. What about you, Chandler? What about the creek?

Oh, yeah. So like I said, I had two older brothers. All boys on both sides were cousins. So I just got drugged around to a lot of situations that I didn't want to be in. But we had a. I know. Poor me, Poor me, poor me.

I think you wanted to be there.

I still have. Okay, I gotta.

I'm blowing your cover a little bit.

Yeah, you are. You're blowing my cover. But we had a creek in a neighborhood where we grew up. And we'd go down there, but we knew, you know, kind of stay within these boundaries. And Chase, I remember one time I was like, what, four? I was four. And, Chase, you would be eight. So you were like, hey, I found this place. Let's go. Like, it's got a huge. You liked rocks. Like, you're like. It's just got a big rock in the middle of it, and we can swim out. And we started just going farther and farther, wandering. And we went through. What were those holes?

Like, the water? It was the big concrete water.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like, we, like, we went through the tunnels. Yes, we went through the tunnels. We were gone. I had no clue. And I just remember we were on.

An adventure that would be like, our boys, right?

That would be, like, dating and Kelly taking them.

Yeah. And so I just remember at some point, like, I just got nervous and I, like, started crying. I was like, I can't. To all three of us.

You missed your mom.

And I was like, I can't go back on my own. I have no clue where I'm at. Like, I, like, remember trying to think through it. I was like, I can't turn back. I'm too far gone. They won't come back with me, so I just have to go. But I was like, if we don't go back now, we're destroyed when we get home. Like, I knew it did it rain or something?

No, no, that was a different time. We took Chandler out into a lightning storm.

Okay.

So there's.

That was a good one.

It was nice.

Long story short, when we get back, there's, like, police.

People are yelling in the neighborhood, trying to find us.

We called the police.

Yeah. Cause it was forever. Like, we were gone.

When you scream for an hour for our babies and you can't hear, nobody answers you.

Neighborhoods.

I didn't let Chandling get away from me for a long period of time. The boys, I was used to them kind of wondering. But not my little girls.

We'd be in the woods with power tools.

The police chase each other.

Building with a saw.

Jeez. So the police are there.

Your nail guns going off.

The police are there. But Chandler still.

Long story short, they. I explain all this to them at 4 years old. I'm like, I didn't want to be there. I wanted to come home. They wouldn't take me. And so they get their spankings first. Remember corporate spankings? We're all watching each other. And so I'm last, and dad goes out with the boys, and he tells mom to kind of handle it. And she's watching me cry. I, like, saw her hesitate. She goes, just pretend like you're crying. Just pretend to scream. No, she did it, too. You both did it to me. Yours was on the side of the bathtub. You did it on the side of the bed.

So that's what's wrong with Chandlin today. She didn't get her spankings.

Sorry, baby. Sorry, baby.

It is.

Drew said, the lights are coming on. And Drew, he's getting revelation of everything. One more thing and then we'll switch questions. Do y' all remember the day I crashed your freaking dune buggy?

I slightly. I honestly don't remember.

Chandlin had just gotten off of the go kart. And so then Ron just takes it for a second.

It was a dune buggy. It had roll bars and everything. It was crazy.

The brakes went out. The brakes went out, and I launched.

It into a construction site.

What it was is our neighborhood was just literally just one road and then a cul de sac. And then. So he was riding down, and then it was kind of a hill going towards the cul de sac. And then there was a house, but right there. And behind the house was the creek. But he went down. I was in the cul de sac. And I remember him just, like, putting his thumb up.

Look at me.

Putting his thumb up at me. And I Was like, go for it, dad. You know? And all of a sudden, the brakes were off. He went down and hit the curb. And all of a sudden he just. And then I'm, like, freaking out. And then my dad. Then my dad starts walking up the hill, and he's holding it, and you can see his bone and his wrist.

I remember being, like. Walked away. That's all I remember.

I thought I was hurt bad. I remember I cracked my ribs, but I remember that I've never done that before. I couldn't breathe.

Ambulance came.

So I thought I was like, man, I've done something bad here. Face had meat pulled off side. I was bleeding. My arm was tore all to pieces.

Broke your wrist, right?

Oh, man. Broke it, like, in four places and stuff. They wanted to put screws in it, and I wouldn't let them.

But you took one for the team. You took.

And then we got. Got old tapes of me preaching. I'm walking around preaching with my arm in a sling, my arms in a cast. Ask some of these other questions because I know we got.

Let me ask you, Chaz. What would you say the difference in your mom and dad, the major differences would be between your dad being raised by your dad being raised by your mom? Same house.

One lets you get away with everything. One or not?

I'd say, yeah. I'd say mom depends on what it was. Was more lenient on some things, and then dad was probably more strict on some others. But it wasn't really, like, big stuff. Some of it would just be, like, small stuff, you know, like little things, like games we could play or, like, music we could listen to or.

Or Pop Tarts under your bed.

Chaz didn't get in trouble much, so he should have gave me that question.

Okay, let me ask you. Let me ask you. What's the difference between your mom and growing up?

Well, I would always come to you for money things.

Chase was the wedger. He would bring the wedge in the marriage. No, he would come and ask Mama. He would work Mama.

Yeah, go ahead.

Well, I don't know. I just felt like I'd always had some favor in my mother's eyes, being the first fourth boy, you know, So I don't know. I always would, but I would if there was something that I did that was wrong. I would always go to my dad, though, like, for something, like, if it was, like, something big that was really bothering me, like, I would always go to him. I wouldn't ever really try to hide it, but just for, like, little certain things, like you know, wanting to go over to a friend's house or spend the night on a school night or something like that. Those are all mom questions, you know.

I mean, I. I kind of say the same. That, like, if it was something, like, I felt, like, a deep, like, guilt for or something that was really, like, when I was really bothering me.

Deep guilt or not.

When I stabbed my brother.

Question on whether or not it was right or wrong, you know, like, normally I feel like I'd go to dad for that or if I. If I thought I needed, you know, prayer for. For something or whatever.

Yeah.

But I'd always go to mom for. For, like, comfort most of the time, or if I was. If I was sad or.

Yeah.

Yeah. I'd always go to mom all the time.

What about you, Chan?

I'm about to say I think mine's completely different because I'm a girl.

Yeah.

I went to my dad for comfort a lot. I was Big Daddy's girl. But, like, me and you were best friends. Like, we had a very, like, not odd relationship. It was just different. Like, we were really close. We took lots of shopping trips and concerts and road trips.

Yeah.

Like, we did things like that together. And me and dad, like, that was more fun. It was more sentimental. It was more sentimental. We were more fun. Let's go to an amusement park and eat Cheesecake Factory afterwards, You know, me and dad, let's listen to Van Halen with the top down and go look at the Motor Mile and not buy a car, just spend time together. Drew, we did a milkshake.

Since you've been in the family, how many years have you been in the. How many years have y' all been married?

Four.

This year would be five years.

But you've been. You've been around us a long time. You've been in the Ministry a long time.

Since he was 15.

He's been in the ministry 15.

Since he was 15, right?

16.

16. What would you say, the difference in just being around us, hanging out?

I think they pretty much nailed it. He's the, like, straightforward, rigid, discipline, really. He's going to be the same thing every time you see him.

Rigid, wow.

Yeah, you are.

Well, you're just not rigid enough.

You get what you're.

Rigid's a manly word.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's firm in how you look good.

On my tombstone, though. He was rigid.

Yeah, you were.

I'd go up that tombstone and I'd say, that's a bad man right there.

I think what he means is you're more black. And white. Yes, you're very black and white.

I'm like the Lord. I do not change.

Okay.

There's no middle bone.

What about me, Drew? What about me? Come on. Come on, Drew.

You're really pretty.

Come on, Drew. Be nice. Drew.

I think you're very fun, very outgoing.

Yes, you are.

Is Chandler. Who's Chandler? More like.

Oh, my gosh.

Oh, yeah. That's pretty easy. She's just like you.

She's just like me.

Clone.

I'm asking you to say yes.

That's what I want to hear.

And y' all have a daughter just like her. Yeah. That's some strong bloodline.

So, Jordan, what would you say about us? The difference.

Hmm? Use a word. Besides bridge yourself.

Brace yourself. Here she comes.

I'll say one thing. They love Folgers Coffee. And they always have, like, seriously, that is one thing. Y' all have both consist. Y' all have both consistent. Right? But they've both consistently been.

Or.

I feel like y' all have. Y' all have values that have always stayed the same between you two. But I will say that, like, me and you are even closer than, like, me and my mom, you know, like, you know, more details. Like, and we can talk deeper in everything. And then he would be. You know, I grew up without my dad, like, in my life for a majority of my childhood, you know, and he. When he met me, I was super young. So when I feel like he was always just there as, like, support, fatherly. But obviously, I don't have a connection with, like. Like, his own children. But in my eyes, I would look at. I would look at him as a father figure for me, and then I feel like we're just, like, really close, honest, and can be open with each other. And that, honestly, though, has been key.

Because we've had some hard conversations over the years, but we. But we know we love each other.

Yes, exactly. Exactly. Here we go.

Here's a hard one.

Yeah.

Here's the hard. You need to do a hard one.

Okay. Preacher's kid. Preacher's kids. Three of you were preacher's kids.

Don't hurt us.

What's the pro. What is one of the things that just stinks about being a preacher's kids?

Don't be real or irrelevant right here.

Chandler, you go first. It just stunk. It just stunk.

Growing up, there was no. There was no hiding. You couldn't, like, get away from it. You know what I mean?

Right.

No matter how hard you wanted to.

Sort of funny and sort of nuts.

Yeah.

There's no hiding.

You can't get away from it. Like, I remember, y' all talk. You know, I don't want to get deep into this, but y' all talk about Chase's addiction and his years, but you don't really talk about mine much. And I think that's because I'm your little girl, you know, kind of want to protect me more in that way. But I had years where I was, like, really rebellious and, you know, just kind of going crazy. But, like, even in that, I mean, I just remember driving down the road, and I'd see someone with a phone, like, taking a picture of me if I was, like, smoking a cigarette or, you know, something. And they would send pictures. Like, you know, I saw tables of.

Mom and dad looking out for y'.

All.

And that. That's a pro and a con in itself. Cause at some point, someone's age, you resented it.

But now I'm sure you're kind of gravitational.

We really did. Let me help people understand the context. The city of Greenville. I don't know about the county. The city of Greenville, South Carolina, which is where we ministered 27 years and my kids grew up, had 87,000 people. We had 22,000 people in our church.

I call it a little big town.

So you're talking about a fourth to a third of the entire population of a city had traffic through our church at some time or another. So the fact that you say we have eyes, that sounds funny, but actually, people would call us all the time.

Yeah, they would.

I mean, call us all the time.

I saw Chandler. I saw Chase. Duh, duh, duh.

I remember that time. Chase was not doing well at all with drug. I had a cop call me who attended the church. Tell Chase to get out of that house now. A drug bust is about to go down. Tell him to get out. I mean, I had cops telling me stuff is about to go down. I know your son's car. Telling him to get out.

In favor? Honest with you.

So y' all hated it, but some ways we needed it.

Yeah, but sometimes them cops, they knew my name, and they would be like, I'm gonna need you to step out of the vehicle. And I'm like, I only had one.

I'm gonna call your daddy.

There was times where, like, cops would give me some slack, and then, you know, but more so of the time, I had zero. Zero slack.

So, Chase, for you, what is a. It just stunk as a kid.

But after they had done seeing you four times that week, they were tired of seeing you. That was the thing.

They're like, when's he gonna get it?

Well, just growing up at a critical. I was at a critical age whenever the church really like exploded, you were so. And I just remember the thing that I would, I mean, like, look back on and can say that like kind of bothered me at the time was like, y' all were gone a lot more, you know, because, you know, dad was speaking and traveling and stuff and you were going with him or y' all just had a lot of stuff going on, you know, and, and I under, I didn't really understand that then. You know, I was like, you know, like, who are all these babysitters and like, you know, people staying the night and taking us to school sometimes. And I would just be like, you know, it just wasn't normal. So I mean, that would, I mean that and expectations, like, you know, especially being the firstborn, like, everybody was like, you know, you're going to be a pastor, you're going to do this, you're going to take the mic. And you know, and that kind of.

It's a lot.

Everyone knows what you're going to do before you know it.

That's a lot of identity too, you.

Know, for a kid.

Yeah, I just. And all of that. I just, I got tired of it and I just started running and running and running. Just really not doing anything church related or not really caring about God because there was a time where I just kind of felt like God took my parents away from me and so I resented him. I never was like upset or mad at my parents because it was almost like I couldn't. Because I felt like if I was mad at them, then I was mad at God. Yeah, I don't know, because I know that they were doing what God had called him to do. So I was like, how can I be mad at that?

You weren't able to, to feel those negative feelings about it.

But now, I mean, if there was any issue as a child that I had, you know, with their parenting skills or whatever you call it, like, it was settled years and years ago and it really wasn't anything that would scar me or anything like that. It was.

But that's why healing's important.

Yeah, for sure, for sure.

It wasn't a normal home and I regret that if I could have changed.

It, but if I can say something to that, I think that would be my biggest con, is that it just in general just wasn't normal. Because now being married, having a family, you know, when I was somebody who didn't grow up in ministry.

Yeah.

Drew and I, like, we have two totally different dynamics of how we grew up, you know, and so trying to merge the two, he had, you know, in terms of normality, you know, and, like, a good home. Drew had a good, normal upbringing, you know, And I was used to going here and going there. We went. We were just going a lot. And if, you know, there was always big milestone moments that happened in your life, but they happened back to back. You know, things that would typically happen, you know, things that, you know, like, would happen once in someone's life, it would happen multiple times in hours. You know, like, just the things we went through growing up weren't typical. And so trying to merge that into now, in adulthood, into our own family has been difficult for me.

Because what's normal to you wasn't normal to him. What was normal to him wasn't normal to you. Yeah, I see that.

Even simple. Even very, very simple things like, Chase, I know you might not struggle with this, but as the woman of the house, we had people that helped a lot because, like, Chase said, y' all were gone. So we had people that would help clean and, you know, nannies would. Making us dinner and stuff. So I didn't necessarily have home chores where I had to cook, clean, make the bed, do all this. So we get married, and it's like, boom, here's three people's laundry. And you all have to have it done for this time because you have an event here, and you got it, you know, and it's like.

Or you just need some clean underwear.

Yeah, Simply, like, you have one sock that's white, and the other one's, like, blue, and you're like, you know, so.

It just feels like I'm not doing it because the berries are gonna come in.

It's very simple things in life that they never will.

You didn't let them in?

No, my room was always clean.

Chaz, what about you? What about a con growing up in our house?

Khan A. I mean, I'd say probably, like, having to always determine. Try to determine, like, who's. Who's genuine and, like, who's not genuine, and people trying to, like, get to know you or the way they treat you. Because, like, you know, being a pastor's kid, they're. Especially if they. If the first time they meet you, they all. They already know you're a pastor's kid. Whereas if you meet a stranger, it's like, a different approach. So, like, if it's someone you know, that's. That they know you're a pastor's kid or they're in the church, automatically, they're just going to come at you with, like, a different approach. So it's like, you're always having to, like, come in there with, like, and try to determine and, like, who. Who's genuine. And is this really how this person is? Like, would they treat me differently if they didn't know I was a pastor's kid? So it's like, it's crazy to see, like, when you just meet someone for the first time that. That doesn't know your history or your background, how they treat you versus. Versus someone in church or, you know, if you. If you were to travel and go on things with y' all or with dad and people come up to you and they know who you are, it's just like, it's not bad. It's just. You just have to. For me, I always had to figure out and determine, like, kind of put a guard up and be like, okay, well, this might not be this true person's colors because, you know, this is, like a first interpretation of them. And they're. They're. They're talking to me basing. Basing me off of the fact that I'm a pastor's kid.

Yeah, I see that. And that's a lot to ask for kids.

You have to, like, figure out who's genuine and who's not. And I think for. For a lot of. I. I would say for pastor, or at least for me, it's like, I didn't. Like, I didn't hang out. You know, if I'm just being honest, I didn't hang out with a lot of church people my age. Growing up, I had maybe a couple, but I always got along with. With people like, like in. In school, in high school. And some of them knew who. A lot of them knew who we were because their parents went to church. But, like. But they didn't. They didn't kind of have that expectation. It was just like, oh, it's Chad's. Like, this is the Chaz from school. Like, yeah, he likes the things I like. He likes to do, like, some of the things I do. Like, you know, he likes sports and he likes this kind of music or whatever. He likes to hang out on weekends and eat the same foods we do and all this kind of stuff. Whereas there's some people that are just super strict about. About that. And it's kind of like, you know, you feel like you can't be yourself. And I'm not saying, like, Going off and doing bad things like doing wrong and trying to sin. I'm not saying that. I'm just saying simply being able to enjoy who you are as an individual and your likes and your hobbies and, and all that without just having to always be super, super spiritual 247 around church people.

And I hate that.

That's, that's kind of like a difference. Whereas a normal person, you don't have to worry about that. You just, you are who you are and people accept you for that without any sort of expectation. That's probably like the main con because everything else, you know, if you ask me, I, you know, I've loved it. I loved being, you know, I love who my parents are and I've loved being raised by you guys because you taught me so much. And I mean, we wouldn't be where we are today, we wouldn't be doing this podcast and, and allowing people to learn from us.

So that's true.

But that's probably my main con is just the expectations and always trying to put your guard up and see who's really there, who really likes you for who you are and who doesn't.

That's good, Chas. And that's a lot. It is, it's a lot to ask.

It's a lot to ask.

I think it's an age old problem with pastors, kids. I mean, it's the nature of people. And you want to shield your kids from that. I tried. I think that's one of the reasons that I didn't make my kids like toe the line is because I didn't want to make them feel like they had to be perfect. You know, I didn't make them, I didn't want them to feel like, okay, your room has to be just like this and you got to go to every church service. I'm going to get you a babysitter so you don't have to go, so you don't feel that pressure or I'm not going to make you be in the church choir and make you do this and make you do that. But I mean, I'm sure, I mean, as we've heard, you know, that's hindered kids in some areas when I was trying to protect them.

But looking back on it, like, I'm like glad because my kids now complain all the time every time I pick them up from school. Do we have to go to church? Do we have to go to church? Do we have to go to church? Because they, I mean, they have to come and you know, I will Say now that I'm older. Thank you for the babysitters.

Okay, let me ask a question.

I got one I want to ask you.

Ask.

Let me ask. Let me ask. Drew and Jordan. I'm nervous to ask this, but our world is obviously, like you said, it's much different from Drew's, much different from yours, George. It's this world of glass house. It's this world of opinion. It's this world of. There's 16,000 comments after Sunday, and everybody. People are railing you, raking you out and preachers and sneakers and everybody. Everybody's got an opinion. So how has it been? How has it been difficult for y', all, I guess, entering our world because you can't totally get away from it. No, There is an association just by you married our children, that it connected to it, and it has to touch you in some way. I just wonder how it's affected. And it don't necessarily have to be bad. It may have been a blessing to you. I don't know. But how has it affected y' all guys?

Jordan?

Well, me and Chase, when we came together, obviously, we were really young and growing up with, you know, my mom, just my mom, basically, it was my mom, my sister, just us two, all three girls. And then, you know, my dad was in and out drugs. So therefore, my mom raised us to be very strong, strong women. And basically, like, not as in, there's a reason that you guys call me. You know, I'm very. I used to be way more upfront about my attitude, basically, and how I felt. I remember one of the first experiences that I had with the Glass House concept channel mentioned is whenever I was on Facebook and a girl. Girls would try to flirt with my man, and I would blast them, you know, just call them out. Be very immature about it, which is very immature even now, even if you're not in a pastor's family. But I remember, you know, Hope talking to me, and I was like, mad. I'm like, why do I have to adjust who I am? But obviously, I realized that there's. You don't have to be aggressive with everything you do and everything you say and not. You don't have to air your dirty laundry, you know, but that has. I just remember that that was like. That's, like, a key memory, you know, here. And I just know that, like, over these years, it's truly just. I feel like it's been a lot of pressure, even on, like, me as just being Chase's wife, because he. I see the expectations, and I see.

Just the last name.

And I hear people takes away at.

Your freedom a little.

It does. Yeah.

And even, like, down to looking at things on, like. Like, if somebody posted an article and I know them. I know. I've know. I know you guys better than anybody else that's even on staff that's known them for longer, just because we've had that personal experience, like being at home. But I can't go on Facebook and take up for them.

Yeah.

Because. Or my husband or people saying things about me and Chase just because they're there. You know, just. It could be anything.

Your personal freedoms are.

And you literally have to alter the way you. Your mindset thinks and just how.

Humility.

Yeah, it's very. It really is humility. And you have to just. I, like, I always have it in my head, like, even when it comes to them traveling and us not getting more time with them, I always say, you know, and that sucks.

We do.

We would love to have more time with them, but I've learned over the years that God makes every single one of us sacrifice something. And you know what? Apparently for the world, we've gotta sacrifice time with the people that we love. So that's what I look at it as. And that I think that people should be more appreciative and less judgmental on the families like this, because you guys and us, it's hard. It is hard out here.

It's hard out here in these carpenter streets.

It's a lot harder than it.

The opinions are hard.

Yeah.

I don't care how much mature you are, how old, how much you've had to deal with it. That hurt.

It does get easier, though, since you live with it. You just don't.

You get used to it. But when you know in your heart you really try to do the right thing and you really try to do right by people, and you get somebody who totally and completely misunderstands you or don't understand, or.

We personally can hear a conversation. Like, I know Drew and I both probably agree on this. Like, we're there for the conversation, but then somebody will twist it behind it, and we can't. And, like, not being able to be like, y' all don't even know them. Like, you know, like. Or, like, getting in somebody's face and being upset about it. Like, you can't. You legitimately can't. Because then what are they gonna do? They're gonna go and say, oh, that. Have you heard about them carpenters? About your attitude and how, oh, those carpenters have this or they're at, like, this. Jordan acts like this.

That's something you taught me really young, and I.

And you don't want, like, also, you definitely don't want that reputation. But we can't even, like, leave room for error for that reputation to come out.

So what about you, Drew?

Drew, how has it affected you?

Yeah.

The feeling is. Cereal.

It's been really. It's been really great. Obviously, the transition into the family has been great. I've had that there. But I've had opportunities, you know, have arisen just because of connections, I'm sure. And like I say, what Chaz said was probably the hardest aspect of joining the family, which was, like, when people just started treating, you know, treating you different, obviously, because you had a. I don't know if it was connections, you know, you had the ability to say things. You had the ability to voice something that maybe they couldn't. And a lot of people maybe thought that whenever you married into the family that you take on, you know, every single belief that you guys have as far as, you know, how things should be done, how they. The decisions that are made, maybe that we're all in the room making them. But when you marry into the family, you're not necessarily making all those decisions. And I think that's what's hard for most people to understand throughout the church and in the congregation, that we're not perfect.

Aren't we?

Yeah, well, yeah. And that we can't control whether or not those decisions were perfect or not.

But it's been a blessing, I will say, at the end of the day. Right. Like he said, I. After all, everything. I've met some of the greatest friends I could have ever had. I've met some of the most amazing motherly figures that truly. But I've also met some people that use us, like he said. And that sucks.

But if you put it on a scale, does the good outweigh the bad?

I hope it does.

It overflows.

Yeah. Chaz. Good. Outweigh the bad. I hope it does. So one word to describe how you feel about being a carpenter. Chaz. Go.

I feel blessed.

Jordan.

Absolutely blessed.

Proud.

Proud. Yep.

Chandlern.

Oh, man.

One word only. Chandler. Kenny G. One word.

Supercalifragilisticexvalidation.

That one.

Rigid.

I love that.

Yes.

Probably.

Like, different, but in a good way. In a really good way.

Okay.

You know, it's just.

It's different.

That's my whole. Just as me.

I'm spoken, basically. Kind of just different.

Yeah, just different.

Drew. One word.

Loved.

Loved. Aw. I made my day. All right, well, real quick. All right. Chaz, your dad, is he quiet or loud?

He's more quiet.

Okay. Drew, is. Ron. Does he like country or rock?

Country.

I can sing it, can't I? I can sing it.

Chandler, is your daddy a morning person or a night person?

Well, that depends. He does work like, he works better in the morning, but he does stay up really, really late at night.

He's a night person.

They know me.

Chase, does your daddy like the beach or the mountains?

Oh, God.

Come on, Chase.

Dad likes the mountains.

What? Chase. Bonk.

What? Dad always, always talks about going to the mountains. What are you talking about?

Chase. All right, what is it?

Chase liked the Gatlinburg.

That's why he's saying Chase like fanny fairies.

Cherokee.

Chase wanted to go to Cherokee Maggie Valley. He wanted to go to Maggie Valley and get some moccasins and go to Medieval Times.

All right, Jordan. Last one.

Jesus.

Ron, Coke or Pepsi?

Coke. For sure.

Yes. Guys, it's been awesome. I love my kids.

This is our family. This is behind the curtain. This is non stage. This is away from church. And this is the way our life is. The only thing you don't see is these amazing grandchildren.

Aww.

We need to have one with them.

We need to bring them up here. It wouldn't be 40 minutes, it'd be about four minutes before we could take it. But anyway.

Well, I was doing my prayer this morning, and Aria and Roland bust in my office on your rift GG my prayer time live. And they're in my. But everybody loved them. Yes, guys, we love our kids so much. I love you.

I just want you to know. Thank you, Jordan.

Chase, publicly, how much we love you, what you've endured, what you've gone through. But I just. We do. Me and your daddy talked about it for all of you, Drew. And when we say our kids, we say that about you, Drew. We say that about Jordan. We feel like you're ours. God gave you to us as our kids, too. But we believe your next days are your best days. We really do. And we are so proud of you. And we can't wait to see what all God has in store for you guys. It's been awesome being here. Unfiltered, real, raw, relevant. Join us. Go download. Share with your friends. We love you. We'll see you next time.