Who's The Boss? | Ron + Hope: Unfiltered

Foreign. Hello, Ronald. Hello, everybody. This is Ron and Hope. Unfiltered, real raw, relevant. What you doing, babe?

You look lost weight.

Oh, my gosh. Where did. Where'd that come from?

I know you're so proud of it. You've been telling me all day, so go ahead and tell everybody.

No, you told me.

Yes, some clothes.

I went to Paris. Okay. And then I came back and you told me I look fat.

No, I see you butler like an Escalade.

Ron.

I didn't say fat. I said Escalade.

And I said, that is not true that I have been losing weight. And you said, that's not true, Hope. You don't look like you've been losing weight. So what does that say to a woman? No, you look fat.

No, but not the way I put it at all. But go ahead.

I got some suits made, and so they came over this morning to do the fitting, and they're all too big. I told you I lost.

I told her you were not extra large. I said, you don't have to take all them up. I said, you're going to have to go back and sew them up and redo them. I told that woman that.

She said, I have lost an inch everywhere.

That's good. You're doing an Ozempic.

No, I am not. I am doing moderation.

Pushing the plate back on that fried flounder a little bit.

Oh, my God, yes. Because me and Chase went to Cracker.

Barrel two pieces instead of three yesterday.

And I ordered fried flounder. Listen. And a salad. I ate half the salad, and they brought me two pieces of fried flounder, and I ate only one. That is moderate. That is how I'm doing it.

Okay, baby, it's true.

It's working. It's working for me.

So you've lost inches.

Yes.

One inch everywhere. Everywhere.

Yes.

Okay.

You proud of me?

Well, some places we don't want you to lose.

Run.

Is there any way to customize where we lose?

Yeah. That's called liposuction.

I won't do that. I heard it hurts.

Okay, so I heard it makes you.

Like, bruised up and takes a long time to heal from it.

Yeah, I'm gonna do it. I'm doing liposuction one day.

I don't want to put a wand in me and start sucking stuff out of my skin.

I do. I really do.

Why?

I just do.

But it comes back.

It's not supposed to come back in that sense.

That flounder makes it come back. That's how it gets there. In the first place. Then it comes back if you do it again.

What are we talking about today?

Talking about submission.

Submission?

No, we call it who's the boss.

Right, who's the boss?

Sometimes I hear, because people do fight.

About who the boss is.

I. I'm the boss. I'm not.

I'm the head of this house.

I am a part of the social media generation. By necessity, there is more than 50% about it. I don't enjoy. But I do understand the generation that I seek to serve. And I do know the venue and the portal to through which you have to communicate to them, because that's where they're talking.

Right.

There's a lot I'm just not gonna do. I don't like the foolishness of it that preachers do. I don't like the stupidity of it. I like content, but I know that's not what gets clicks.

You don't wanna do a photo shoot a day?

No, I don't wanna do a photo shoot every day. I like great Christian content. I like meaty stuff. But I understand the clicks is, you know, when you bring them into the foolishness. But the problem with the foolishness is it chips away and people don't even realize it's happening at their respect of you. And they say, well, man, you're real. And man, that makes you more real. But the fact is, when you know about everybody's foolishness and weakness, what you don't know is you'll follow them up until a place that's difficult. But when you get to a place that's difficult, you know too much about them to believe in them on that level. And that's the downside of it that people don't realize. And I told people, I said, I would rather be a guy that walks in a room. I would rather be a guy that's respected instead of popular. So I'd rather have a half a million followers and be highly respected than 2 or 3 million followers because I'm. I do dumb stuff all the time. Yeah, so. So I said all that to say this. I engage in it enough to just hear what's the conversation out there. I'll do some YouTube shorts.

What are people talking about?

Yeah, I'll go, you know, I'll go on some secular podcasts because our west coast stuff, I'll do some TED talks, some Silicon Valley type stuff, Elon Musk type stuff because of east stuff, east coast stuff, more Bible Belt. I'll get more into what's the church folks saying. So I, I engage A little bit. I don't have a long attention span. So if something's 30 minutes, no way I'll listen to it.

Five, no way.

I just don't. And when I hear the younger people talk, not necessarily Christian, it can be secular about relationships. It's scary.

Yeah, it's quite interesting.

I've just heard some. Well, you know, if I get married, my husband gonna. And he just. I'm like, where did you get that?

Right?

And then I'll hear the same be true for the other side. And I saw some, you know, some. I talked to someone just this weekend, a young adult. And she said, well, I'll tell you what my man's gonna be. He's gonna make this much money, he gonna. I mean, she just reeled off about nine things that was like, you know, well, you better go marry an AI guy.

You and I never even talked about that. We had goals.

I mean, we didn't want to be struggling. Look, we would build together. Not me. Get a perfect world and bring it to you and serve at you on plate.

Right?

And so when I hear, you know, the way, you know, don't show too much affection because it teaches them that you love them too much and that you'll never be at risk. I mean, I hear stuff like this all the time. And I'm just sitting saying, where is this coming from?

Right?

There's got to be a source somewhere.

I heard somebody say stuff. Protect yourself, young couples. Protect yourself from losing everything. If you, if you should get divorced. So automatically just start out with the prenup.

I'm like, I'm hearing 20 year olds talking about prenups. Number one. I have never heard that till the last five years.

That's craziness.

Yeah, I've never heard that. That is.

You're really just saying, I'm going into this marriage expecting it to fail.

Exactly right. And that right there undermines the whole idea of a covenant. I saw one, this woman, I forget her name, she was a Persian lady. And I looked called her name. No, she was secular and she had a huge following because I'd never seen her before. And you know, mine and yours, story of restoration. And our whole message we preach to people is, hang on, hang on, there's something. If you can make it through, there's something amazing on the other side. That's our. I mean, you've written books on it. This woman was if somebody. Women are only attracted to alpha males. If she cheats on you and you're an alpha male and you take her Back you are no longer the thing that she's attracted to, ensuring it will repeat itself. And I sat there and thought about anything to get out of it that they can find. And I'm like. And so I sit here and this stuff, this stuff is getting 4.3 million views, 1.8 million views. So there is a generation that is eating this stuff up that is 180 degree contradictory to the Bible, to biblical.

Yeah.

Principles and teachings.

Yeah. And so, you know, it's really just out for yourself.

No. Well, we had, you know, we had homes that were very, very functional in the 40s and the 50s and up into the 60s. Then we had the sexual revolution and had the sexual revolution. Then we had the feminism movement. I get equal rights. I get them being able to vote. I get all that. But there was this big move to take the woman out of the home and now downright disgrace her for being in the home. Almost, you know, shame you if you want to be at home and you really want to raise your kids. And I'm just sitting there thinking, you know, the guy that there's a football player, Kansas City Chiefs kicker, he's Catholic. I know you've been out of the nation, I think while this happened, you've been in France. And this guy went to his Catholic college, to a Catholic group of people, very family oriented and gave a very family oriented Catholic speech. And he is being dreaded talking about that they chose for mama to stay home and raise the kids. And that was a statement against women that sends women back 50 years. And so I'm sitting here listening to all this. The divorce rate is climbing. I don't know. All these are Google statistics. And the people, the 40 some percent that are not getting divorced, they say 71% of the women in the 40 some percent are cheating and 68% of the men are cheating. So I'm sitting there saying we have created a calamity because we have moved away from the simplicity of biblical function. Now I want to talk, we're going to talk about. And we can be funny and we can be comical. There's a difference between function and duties. And I'm going to talk about that. But Ephesians 5 marks out the way God wants a house to live.

Yeah. The home is just messed up. We have deteriorated so bad. And I mean, we have talked openly about, you know, the mistakes we've made, how we wish we could go back and redo things, even raising our kids. And you don't know what you don't know truthfully, I mean, you know, when you're young, you're in your 20s, you're having babies or 30s, you know, you. You're trying to even figure out who you are.

You usually reproduce what you saw.

Yeah.

What you saw and what you experienced usually reproduces, but you don't even know.

Who you are at that point. So even then, trying to have a biblically based, if you're a Christian home, home that honors God, home that is healthy, it's difficult. We're not sitting back saying this is easy. We are truly not coming as experts. We're not saying it's easy. We're not experts. But we have learned some things. We've lived long enough. We've overcome some things. We've got things we wish we could have done differently. And one of the big topics, the big umbrellas that so many homes struggle with is submission and the topic of headship. And I think it gets a lot of traction because it is abused so many times. There's people who abuse it and, you know, use the umbrella of I'm the head of this home to make decisions or lack thereof.

Headship is not a power trip.

Right.

Headship is a covering and a sacrifice.

I think that is so. And you have such a great way of explaining that, that it's so true and so biblical.

I'm going to sacrifice for my home and for you, and I'm going to cover my home and I'm going to cover you, period. And none of those two are easy or attractive jobs.

No, it's not. Headship is not laying the hammer down.

Headship is not laying down.

I make the decision.

Headship is not. I walk in the house when I get home and start telling everybody what.

To do or not to do.

And so I think we have allowed a secularism to take that and paint it as something ugly and archaic and no longer working in our modern society, which now giving us the mess that we have and the breakdown of the family, which has had a terrible, terrible, huge impact on our culture, especially in America. I don't know about every other culture but America. Huge one. So let's just go right there. Ephesians 5. You know, wives, submit to your husbands as unto the Lord, as like and as similes. He's not the Lord, but you want.

Me to call you that?

Abraham called Sarah Lord.

Abraham called Sarah.

I mean, Sarah called Abraham Lord. And at our house, you know, you call me Lord, but everybody don't have to follow that.

No, I don't. You want me to, But I have never One time called Jesus.

You got a T shirt with Lord.

On it because he is the Lord.

Lord, run.

Lord Farquaad.

So he sits there and he talks about. And I get to that. I said, people, I said, this is for the sake of function. Just like in the church. Jesus is the head. And he gave these gifts. Apostles, prophets, vandals, and teachers, you know, for the equipping of the saints. So there's an order to things. Everything has to have order. If there's not order, there's confusion. And God is not the author of confusion. He's the God of order. So the Bible is an ordering book. The 12 disciples were 12 people that were disciplined by Jesus. He reigned their life in and gave them these disciplines that caused them to be great. And so that's my stomach growling. I need to go home and eat.

No, before we go forward, we have.

We're gonna break right here.

Yes, right here. Before we get into the meat of it.

Song Finch.

Yep. I love Song Finch. Do you remember the song I had made for you?

Well, you know, we try to use all of our sponsors, but Song Finch. You did a Song Finch for me? Before I knew what a Song Finch was.

That's right. I did one last year for Father's Day.

Yes, you did.

And then I did one a few weeks ago.

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How do you spell it? S O N G, F, I N.

C H. Yes, like it sounds songfinch.com so here again, you know, like some of the others, one of the advertisers that we actually use their product so we can give you our personal recommendation for them. He says in this Ephesians 5, then I want to bring some understanding this especially to young adults and young couples who are married or looking at marriage or trying to figure out how did God design this thing. And he says, wives, submit to your husband as unto the Lord. So you have to understand that when it comes to direction, he who does not provide for his household is worse than an infidel. That don't mean he who does not get a job as an infidel that we're provide the root words vision. He who does not cast the vision for his household. I have a vision for my household, right? I have trusts that I set up. And there's money we don't spend because we're trying to prepare for another generation.

I mean, even when we were in our 20s.

Ron college funds.

You put $25 in college in college funds.

25 bucks in college funds to save up so they would have a college fund. I mean, you know, life insurance, which you have just started selling, and estate planning and other things, wealth management. She just got licensed and all this because when we were doing it for our family, Jesus says this would be something great to do for many people because it helps so many people. You got to have a vision, but it's vision. He who does not have a vision for his household. I'm constantly, we're not where we need to be talking to my children about, you know, do you see yourself doing what mom and dad do?

Yeah.

Do you? Is this even something you want to do? And if you don't, what do you want to do? We will help you in that. We want you to do what God's called you to do. So when you talk about a vision, I'm talking about someone who is charting a course. So in the family makeup, God has charged the man with charting a course. It doesn't mean that women don't have a say so or can't help. But if the women are charting the whole course and the man is going nowhere, that is all of a sudden out of order because God made the woman to be a helpmate, right? And I've always said this, we can't help you. She can't help you do nothing. So, you know, I've always been somewhat visionary. And there you've always been. I tell people the latest big thing we did was six years ago. I mean, life altering thing is when we expanded to the west coast and I told people, you know, I somewhat not dreaded, but I didn't know how the real conversation with you was going to go. We that talks about it, but when I felt like we needed to pull the trigger, I didn't know how that was going to go. And you just looked right back at me, really kind of emotionless and said, ron, I'm going where you're going. Hopefully that came from years of building your trust, right, that I've gotten it wrong. But I hope I got it right more times than I got it wrong. And so you trusted me enough to say, you know, I'll follow you. And when I failed, you usually aren't saying I told you so, you know, you aren't waiting for me to screw up so you can prove you're right. All these things which hurt so many marriages. So here again, it's submission to the vision of the house and the role you may have to play to make the family successful, whatever that role may be. Now that's where people start arguing. I haven't got to that yet. Then it says, husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church.

That's unfathomable love that I can't even, I can't even understand it for my own personal self.

That is unfathomable. I am supposed to love you with an unfathomable love that, you know, we're still, we have, you know, theologians trying to describe the word agape, which is the love of God. God is love. Love with the love of God, your wife. Okay, let's go back to wife. Submit to your husband. Somebody that loves you like that is easy to follow.

So easy. Because how did he love me?

He gave me unconditionally.

He gave me everything. He gave me his best. He laid down his life for me. He gave freedom. I mean, he paid the price for peace for me, for joy for me. So for my husband, now he wants to make sure I have peace. He wants to make sure I Have joy. He wants to make sure I'm secure, that I'm taken care of.

We'll talk about the things you do for me. And there are a myriad of things you do for me, but let me tell you, let me just go for that. Okay. I know you love a clean house.

I do.

So when I make my sandwich, what am I in there doing cleaning up. I'm wiping that counter off. Not because I've made you do it. You know, Hope's going to get so ticked off if I. That's. My wife loves her house to be clean. Why? Because we have people that could come over at any time. We entertain people. And I know how you want your house presented.

Well, it makes. Not only that, it gives me like a settling in my heart, like in my spirit.

These are the things that say, I love you. It ain't just, you know, you've done something terrible and can I love you through it? That's not what it's talking about. I understand the things that brings Hope pleasure and I try to love you in that way. I know things that can be taxing to you. So I tried to pick up slack. I don't like washing clothes. I'm not good at folding them as you are. But, you know, we had kids over for Memorial Day and we do have a pool and we had at least 67,000 towels laying around everywhere. I took loads of underwear. When you got back there, I had washed two loads of clothes and bathe and so. Okay. That's not a normal duty.

Right.

But it was sitting there and you.

Didn'T want me to have to do it. No.

At the end of the day, you're going to come in there tired and then you're going to have to start doing it. So I hope would really appreciate it if I probably went ahead and just threw all these towels in there and started washing them. I think you told me one time I thought, no, I heard you tell somebody else. Ron is mindful of me, right? He's mindful of me.

You know the scripture. For the joy set before him, he endured the cross that is so powerful. For the joy set before him. What was the joy? It was us. He went through pain. But because I love you so much, there'll be times work. It's hard to love you. It's hard for you to love me. It's hard for you to love me like Christ loved the church. Christ loved the church so much. We were the joy set before him. He endured the cross love.

Whatever you set before you gives you the strength to endure. People who cannot endure have nothing they're looking at. Okay, I have somewhere I want my marriage to go. When we had an empty nest, I didn't want me and you look at each other and be strangers.

Right?

Okay, I have somewhere that I want it to go when I'm no longer the man. Okay, I get it. I get it. There's going to be one day they gonna start looking for the next guy. I get it. I don't know how it'll feel. I don't know how I'll embrace it. I don't know if I'll struggle with it or I'll be okay with it. I don't know. But I know it's coming. And so I'm already looking forward to what is my life gonna be like. Cause I'm not gonna sit around and cry because I'm not the guy no more. What will our season look like then? So because of those things, we endure hardships, difficulties, and disciplines today because of what we want tomorrow.

Right?

I want to live a long time. I exercise. I've had a lot of my people lived a long time on both sides of my family. But I've had two close to me die early, way too early. And a lot of what I do, I just want to stay in shape because I was always an athlete. But another part of what I do is I want to be here a long time.

I want to be healthy.

I want to be healthy. So there's things I. You have an apple cobbler.

And I threw it away this big? Yes.

I don't know why you brought that home.

Because it was Memorial Day.

This big. But I don't know who made that thing. Deli or whatever, it was massive. And then I saw two half gallon things of vanilla ice cream.

Ron. It was Memorial Day when I had that.

But we don't eat like that. So I came home, apple cobbler, hot, with vanilla ice cream on top of it.

Yay.

Is the devil. Is the devil. Okay. I cannot tell you how many times after you had gone to bed, you were tempted. I wanted to stick a fork in that thing. And I didn't do it. Why?

For the joy of the world.

I'm bad to eat apple pie? No. But I have numbers I'm trying to control. I have things I'm trying to do. I want to be here a long time.

For the joy set before you.

For the joy set before you. You end those things and you discipline yourself. Now, wives, let him cast a vision and be that support and help in whatever role.

What if he don't cast a vision? What do they do now?

You're getting into counseling.

No. What if the man does not even have a vision?

We have a very.

Okay. The Bible says if he doesn't have a vision for the house, he's worse than an empty house.

Do you remember then what the couple we were talking about last night at dinner we were concerned about.

Yes.

Case in point. She's an extremely ambitious woman. And he's a man who has done fairly well, but he's just. He's fine.

He's casual.

He's fine. Why aren't you good? I'm good.

He goes to work, comes home, goes to work, comes home.

And he's good with that. And he's peaceful and he's like, no, nothing's good enough for you. The fact is, she's extremely ambitious.

Right.

And that has been a great point of contention. I don't think a podcast can handle that. But the fact is, even if he's not, and even if he feels like he's not built that way, God did not tell the woman in the relationship to drive the vision of the family. And I'm going to tell you something. Everything was fine in the Bible as long as Adam was feeding Eve. When that thing got reversed and Eve started feeding Adam, all of a sudden, everything started spiraling down. You can't just casually let things get out of order because God has it ordered for a reason. Now, we got a few minutes left. Well, we don't have many. I want to talk about for 5 minutes how Ephesians 5 is mutual submission. We talk about that in a marriage conference. Wives, submit to your husband. Husbands love you wise. And it goes into, you know, it goes into employees, employers. It goes into parents. To not exacerbate your children. Don't frustrate them. You know, children, obey your parents. So it goes through a whole litany of give and take, give and take, give and take. But people are trying to make roles and duties biblical. Like, I don't wash dishes. That's not the man's job.

Yeah, they're trying to fit things into a category.

Okay, now wait a minute.

There's really no category.

Where'd you get that? Yeah, you know, I can't help you rake leaves. That's what the man does. Okay. I can honestly say that cannot be, to my knowledge, biblically supported. You're talking about the duties of keeping a home and a life.

Right?

I. You and I, we've done it together, or whoever gets there first.

Yeah. Just don't be lazy.

I don't. You know, that's not my job. That's not what I do. Well, I don't. I hate washing dishes.

I hate it, too.

I mean, I cannot stand. I don't know what it is. I'd rather take out eight bags of trash than wash one dish.

I don't like it either.

I just can't stand.

But what if we both just said, I don't like it? You don't like it. We're not going to do it.

Yesterday you had a load and I had a load. There's dishes in the sink. It's life. It's not. I'm not touching them. I'm gonna let them sit there three days. Because hope does that.

I think selfish, that is not loving your family.

And I don't think it's realistic.

Like, Christ loved the church.

I don't think not. You know, there are things that may take more of a manly strength or, you know, something that I would never ask you to come help me with. You know, I was out on the deck yesterday moving around metal chairs. No, I don't want you doing that. You know, you had back problems. This, that and other. I would never ask you to do that. And, you know, you got things, you just take care of it and you don't ask me. But for the most part, duties and roles are not man or woman. They are shared. Even when you were breastfeeding our children, we were talking to a couple at night, and I said, no, sir, I didn't know. She's getting. I got up with the kids. He never got up. And I looked right in at the people we were talking to. I said, that didn't work in my house, buddy.

But it wasn't because I made you. It was because you loved me.

We agreed. I can't nurse a child. So when we hear the baby crying, I remember what we did. When we hear the baby crying, you.

Would go get the baby.

You start situating yourself to wake yourself up, sit up in the bed. I would go get the child and bring the child to you. And when it was finished, I would take the child and lay it back. But, I mean, I can't do what you do. You can do the other thing. Women.

Listen, I'm sorry. I got the best husband in the world. I'm sorry. Y' all do not have what I have.

I'm not trying to. Am I coming across like that?

No. I am telling you, I hit the spot.

I just think it needs to be shared.

Hit the jackpot.

And I hear a lot of young couples, you know, I'm not going to do that. You know, my mom always did that at our house, and the woman does that. And I'm just going to tell you what worked for your mom and dad in the 50s and 60s may not work there.

Life is different, especially if both of you work.

Most income. Most houses were single income back then. Now they're dual income houses. And that just ain't going to make a family run. There's nothing going to get done. And you and I both, you did for a while when you were raising kids. I call it cherry pick. You worked and you as a mom, you know, you weren't grinding it out 50 hours a week, but you were doing things that we needed you to do within the ministry, but you were also mom. And so we just found a way to make it work. And I think that's the way you have to approach it. Biblical submission and duties in a home. You can't take these duties things and try to make them spiritual and have a Bible argument over them raising kids.

Doing life is a juggling act. It is just a crazy circus juggling act. And you just have to get in there together and make.

I don't know how you got it done without help, hope, because I remember me and you both working together and still feeling overwhelmed. So, you know, the guys is like, I'm not changing no diapers.

What?

When they, what, four, five, six diapers a day? You ain't gonna ever change any four.

Or five or six.

I mean, what's 10 or 12? I don't know. And you know, you were changing them all day. But when I got home, if you was in there cooking and I saw the diaper dragging the ground, you know, I don't sit there and say, ho, come change the diaper, pick my baby up and go back there and change their diaper. Didn't it?

It's not babysitting either, when it's your own child.

No, it's called parenting. It's called love, it's called nurture. And you know, you sit there and you do it. So. Not to drag our podcast out, but I wanted to let everybody know. Biblical submission, I hear a lot of fighting about just duties and roles, household roles, and they try to make them spiritual and fit them in here. The Bible does not support whether or not you cut the grass or your wife cuts the grass. Yeah, it doesn't support that.

Y' all just figure out how to get the grass cut.

Cut the grass. Yeah. And so those are the things. Those are out of what we did wrong. And we've made our mistakes known to the whole world. Function of a household. I give us an A. Minus.

I don't know. I think we get an A. We got in there and worked together. We made mistakes, yes, but we had.

Kids and our house was clean.

Our house was always clean.

Our grass was cut, the oil was changed.

And we didn't always have a housekeeper.

And we worked hard. No, we didn't have a housekeeper until our kids got older. I'm talking about when you got little kids just running all over the house and there's jelly on the wall and.

There'S my kids, my kids. The pre sun on the floor, three meals a day. There were no dishes in the sink when we went to bed at night.

No. And the house was at least straight.

Yes.

I don't mean baseboards wiped down, but the house was straight.

Our grass.

Because we did that. Yeah, we did those things. And me and you didn't sit there and resent the fact that we had to do it. He's not washing dishes. And I'm not saying she's not helping me pull these weeds out of the mulch. I don't know. We just didn't do it. I just. I need to go. Where you going? I got to get these weeds out of the mulch. What you going to be doing?

You know why I'm going to finish.

Up these ditches and I'm going to the grocery store?

Because you had a vision for our house, and I think that's huge. You can't. I think we're trying to, you know, stop the bleed, but we got to figure out why it's bleeding.

It starts with that foundational truth.

You had a vision for our home. You wanted our home to be excellent. You wanted not just for show. You wanted to honor God. You wanted to honor the Lord in your role as a husband, as a daddy. And you had a vision for us. You wanted us to be better every. Every year. You wanted our savings to increase. You wanted our living to increase. You wanted our mindset to increase. And, you know, you didn't want us looking like crap in the neighborhood.

No. Now I'm gonna tell you something. Now that's a whole nother topic. You know how I feel about the way you look?

Yes, I do.

Yeah. I mean, you know, Escalade.

I do.

Yeah. That's a whole nother story. Because, you know, I. I have always felt that way, that I want people. I want people to look at you. This has nothing to do with the way you're dressed or your attire. I'm not talking about diamonds and design. I'm talking about. I want somebody to look at you.

And know that you care about me.

Because somebody loves her.

Yeah. Know that you care about me.

To look at your peace, to look at your. To hear your laughter, to see the way you get along with people, to not see heaviness on you. I want people to look at her and say, somebody loves that woman. And that means a lot to me because here again, Bible, the woman is the glory of the man. Man is the glory of God. The woman is the glory of the man. And so these things are extremely important. And I just hope there's a lot of younger adults, married or getting married that's listening to this. Don't take daily trivial activities and spiritualize them. And to, you know, the husband and the wife role. Do what needs to be done as a team and work it.

You know, I think though, Ron, some people over spiritualize it, but I think some people, how do I say this nicely? I don't think it can be you. You might pose it as spiritual, but the root of it is lazy.

Just don't want.

You just don't want to do it. And how can God bless that?

Because they're not going to go on a proverb, book of proverbs rant on diligence about how God blesses the diligence. And when you look at God bless.

You preached a whole series on that.

God has some harsh things to say to the slothful.

Yes, he does.

He has some harsh things to say. Say poverty will come on you like a thief, like a thief, like a.

Thief if you're slothful.

And he says, but the diligent, and not diligent, but the diligent will be the blessed. The upright man will be blessed. So I think here again, we don't have to sit here and talk about what we've done wrong because we wrote books on it. But some of the things we did right we can sit here and talk about we did that right. It was always Hope. It was always Ron and Hope.

A team. We were a team.

It was run in Hope at church, it was running hope at home. And that was why when our marriage was vulnerable, we had a whole host of people say, I can't say one name. Well, it's not Ron, it's not Hope. It's Ron and Hope. Why? Because the whole world knew we're a package. So we came into life As a package. We took on life as a package. We took on debt as a package. It wasn't, you got to pay this off.

Right?

Okay. We have.

How can we help each other pay it off?

We have this credit card debt. We have these school loans. So we're up to the package.

We figured it out. You had a vision. You had a vision for our finances. You had a vision for how to pay it all.

And so I know couples that live together and have jobs and don't even know how much money each other have. See, I can't in my wildest dreams imagine not jointly attacking your debt and your future.

Right.

I just don't understand. So hopefully what we have said, this isn't a rant. This is really wanting to help because we teach a lot more out of our pain, probably, than we teach out of our successes. But our teamwork has been a success. When we do things as a team, we usually come out better, more than we come out worse. And we approach everything. I'll end with this one. When we knew everybody was coming over for Labor Day. Where's the meat? You're over there stirring potato salad. There's no art. We didn't talk about it. You just start grabbing. Okay, I'm getting the cups.

You're cleaning the pool.

I'm wiping off the table. And you're in there. You're in there. You're pulling out the chips. You're door dashing. We got this. You just do it. And we had a great day together. A great day. And you know what? When everybody left, everything was cleaned back up, and we went to bed. And your house was in shape because we had an unexpected guest pop through the front door who wanted to give us a housewarming gift. And so you weren't embarrassed and ashamed with food and crap and towels laying everywhere. Why? Because we worked it as a team. Now that seems so little and so trivial, but it's stuff like this that's killing marriages. It's killing marriages. Fight like cats and dogs over stuff like this. Team Carpenter, let's do this. So we took you a little longer than normal, but this is kind of a hot button topic. So I knew coming here today, we was going to have a lot to talk about. We may talk about it some more. I'm going to let you end it. I did Song Finch and everything. So you get the end of it.

Real raw, relevant.

Running hope.

Running hope Unfiltered.

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