Remove Toxic People From Your Life with THIS | Jack Canfield

Hi there, I'm Jack Canfield. You know, we all aspire to do, be and have great things. But sometimes it feels like there are things beyond your control that are holding you back. And sometimes those things aren't really things at all, but people. So today I want to talk about what you can do when the obstacles on your path are toxic. And the negative people who are trying their best to drag you down to their level and keep you from achieving your full potential. So the first thing I'd like to do is take a minute to consider the people who you spend the most time with in your life. Your family members, the people at work, your friends, your neighbors. And I want you to ask yourself the question, who among them belongs to the Ain't It Awful Club? You know the kind of people I'm talking about. The ones who are always complaining about everything and who are blaming others for their circumstances and their lack of results. The ones who are always judging others, spreading negative gossip and talking about how bad everything is. The dream stealers who tell you that your goals are unrealistic and impossible to achieve. And they try to persuade you and dissuade you from believing in and pursuing the life you most want to live. Now, if you have toxic people like this in your life, here's what I want you to do. If you haven't already reached the point in your self development where you no longer allow negative people to hold you back with your victim mentality and their mediocre standards, you have to free yourself from their negative influences at all costs. Otherwise they will stand in the way of you achieving your dreams. Now, if it's impossible for you to free yourself from them completely, maybe they're your co workers and you're currently stuck in your job. Or they're a family member who you have no choice but to live with or take care of. But there's still a lot you can do to shield yourself from their negativity and to liberate yourself from their hold on you. You can do some form of meditation to help you realize that you don't have to attach yourself to their thoughts, their words or actions that might trigger you. One that I learned early on in my life is that when you're with people being negative and it's difficult to get away, is to imagine yourself surrounded by a giant eggshell of white light. Imagine all the negativity bouncing off the outer boundary of that light. Now, another thing you can do is to build your self esteem through personal development workshops so that you have the resilience to withstand any attacks on you. It will help you develop an I can mindset. You can also use something called EFT or Emotional Freedom Technique, referred to most often as tapping, to release any negative thoughts or belief any toxic people may have tried to instill in you. Now this is a powerful tool for building and maintaining your emotional resiliency. In fact, I have a video on my YouTube channel that will introduce this simple but powerful technique to you. Another thing to do is to limit the amount of time you spend with toxic people as much as possible. You know, I had a client who didn't want to go home for Christmas holidays because his brothers and sisters were so toxic and negative. However, he didn't want to hurt his mother because he really loved her and enjoyed spending time with her. So what we decided for him to do was to not go home for Christmas holidays, but then visit his mother alone a week or two after everyone else had left. At the same time that you're setting boundaries with the toxic people in your life, it's also important to actively seek out more positive, kind, nurturing, encouraging, affirming, supportive people and and people that are in the goal achieving and spend more time with them instead. It's commonly believed among psychologists and coaches that you become like the five people you spend the most time with. So if you're going to be great, you have to start spending more time with great people. So I want you to make a conscious effort to surround yourself with positive, nourishing and uplifting people who believe in you, encourage you to go after your dreams and applaud your victories. And over time, the toxic people in your life will no longer have the same impact on you. Now, another thing that will free you from the negative impact of toxic people is to let go of the past. If these toxic people have hurt you in the past and you're still holding on to that hurt and pain, that means that they still have emotional control over you. You're allowing them to still keep you small and wounded. And the best way to take back your control and liberate yourself from their influence once and for all is to let the past go and forgive them if possible. Now when you release your past hurts, your anger and your fear, you open yourself up to embracing a better future. And the energy you've been using to hold on to anger and resentment now becomes available to you to create more of what you want in your life. You know, I've known people who have forgiven their parents or an ex spouse and then literally doubled their productivity and their income in the following months. So whether it's in your business, family or personal relationships, you're always more effective and productive when you come from a place of love and forgiveness. And remember, forgiving someone doesn't mean you're condoning their actions, and it doesn't mean you have to spend time with them or trust them again in the future. You just need to learn whatever lessons there are for you to learn from that. Release them from any further expectations and then move on. Letting go of your hurt and anger is what takes you out of the past and puts you back in the present where you can forge ahead and create the future that you want. And finally, I want you to remember that ultimately you are 100% responsible for your life and your results. You may not be able to control the actions and behavior of the people in your life, but you can control how you respond to them. So I want you to understand that only you can let go of your own limiting beliefs about who you are and what you're capable of achieving in life. You will need to give up blaming others for your results or lack of results if you want to change those results and create better outcomes in everything you do. Only you can build self confidence and motivation that you need to succeed in life. So even if your life has been troubled with the presence of negative and toxic people who've tried their best to hold you back, I want you to realize that only you have the power to to keep allowing that or to change that situation for the better. So I want to leave you with a bit of homework. If you have toxic people in your life, I want you to identify one small action that you'll take today to reduce their hold and impact on you. You may want to go to YouTube and choose one of the many meditations on self compassion that are there. Close your eyes and listen to it. Or maybe you might want to schedule a free consultation with an EFT tapping coach. Or you could decide to go online and download a free resource that will help you build your self confidence and your self esteem. Or you could reach out to a positive and supportive person you know and ask them if they'd like to go for a walk or have a cup of coffee with you. Now whatever your action is, and it doesn't have to be a big one, but it has to be something and then go ahead and commit to do it no matter what and then complete that action today before you go to bed tonight. And then keep doing that day after day, small step by small step and watch how you and your relationships change and to hold yourself accountable. Go ahead and leave a comment below to let us know what action you're going to take. And remember, making a public declaration increases your level of commitment to actually doing it, and I would love to see what you've committed to do to change your life now. If you found this video helpful, make sure you like it, share with a friend who might need it, and subscribe to my channel for more videos like this one. And for some additional resources on how to reach your full potential, be sure to visit my website at jackhamfield. Com. Thanks again for watching. And remember, only you have the power to change your life. So let's start using that power today.