The Importance of Confidence | Jack Canfield

Hi, I'm Jack Canfield, and today I want to talk to you about the importance of self confidence and teach you four simple strategies that will help you become a more confident person. You know when you meet someone for the first time and you immediately think, wow, that person is really successful, or that person is great at what they do, it's because they're showing up in the world in such a confident way, you. You automatically believe the best about them. And that's the difference that confidence makes. When you truly believe in yourself, you exude a level of confidence that inspires others to believe in you as well. And when you're radiating a high level of self confidence, you'll find it easier to attract the opportunities, the resources, and the support you need to achieve your goals and live a more successful and more fulfilling life. Unfortunately, most people don't have a lot of confidence in themselves. And there are several reasons for this. First, they listen to the little voice in their head that tells them they're not smart enough, they're not talented enough, they're not educated enough, they're not competent enough, they're not skilled enough, not experienced enough, they're not attractive enough, not healthy or strong enough. And therefore, they don't have what it takes to be successful. And so then they don't try. And that's a tragedy, because the world needs all of us to show up and contribute whatever our talents and skills are now more than ever. Now, the good news is this. Self confidence isn't something you're either born with or not. Confidence is something you are in charge of creating. And today I'm going to share four strategies that will help you develop your self confidence. All of these techniques are built on the premise that self confidence is the result of successfully surviving a risk. In order to learn to walk, you had to risk falling down. In order to become an actor, you have to risk forgetting your lines, risk receiving negative reviews, and risk being rejected at auditions. In order to become a successful investor, you have to risk losing money. And to have confidence in your ability to speak in front of a large group, you have to risk it and be successful. Each time you succeed, the more confidence you build. But without taking that risk, you can't build your self confidence. So here's tip number one. You have to take risks. But the risks you take should be small ones at first. Large enough to stretch you out of your comfort zone, but small enough to give you a real shot at success. Your first speech should not be to a group of a thousand people. Start with a small group. Now, I started my speaking career as a high school teacher speaking to five classes a day of 35 students. And over time I spoke to larger and larger groups. And yes, I had a few failures along the way, but I survived them and I learned from them and integrated what I learned into my next talks. Now, eventually I became comfortable talking to large convention groups of 10,000 people at a time. So you start small and work your way up. I've appeared on a lot of small cable TV interview shows, slowly developing my confidence over time before I ever appeared on Oprah, Larry King, and the Today Show. Now my second tip is to use the power of visualization, and here's why. Psychologists and neuroscientists have discovered that your body cannot tell the difference between a real event and a vividly imagined event. So if self confidence comes from successfully surviving a risk, you can do that over and over in your imagination simply by visualizing yourself taking that risk and being successful. You can imagine successfully giving a speech and getting a standing ovation, getting the part you want in that play or that movie, shooting par in golf, giving a great interview on television, or successfully making that sale if you're a salesperson as a way to increase your confidence because you will have already succeeded in your mind so many times, you want to make this a daily practice. Now, if you want to learn more about the power of visualization and vision boards, simply click the button on the screen to get my vision board guide. Now another advantage of making it a daily habit to sit with your eyes closed for a few minutes and visualize yourself performing at a highly capable and successful level is that you are firing the same neurons in the same patterns in your brain that you would be firing if you were actually doing the task you're visualizing. Psychologists call this mental rehearsal, and done over time, it actually improves your skills. In one of our early Chicken Soup for the Soul books, we published a story about Major James Nesmith. He was a U.S. navy combat pilot who was shot down over Vietnam during the Vietnam War and then spent the next seven years in a North Vietnamese prison camp. During those seven years, he was imprisoned in a cage that was approximately 4ft and 1 half feet high and 5ft long. And during almost the entire time he was in prison, he saw no one, talked to no one, and experienced no physical activity. During the first few months, he did virtually nothing but hope and pray for his release. But then he realized he had to find some way to occupy his mind or he was going to lose his sanity and probably his life. And that's when he started to visualize in his mind. He selected his favorite golf course and started playing golf every single day. He played a full 18 holes at his imaginary country club. He experienced everything down to the last detail. He saw himself dressed in golfing clothes. He smelled the fragrance of the trees and the freshly cut, trimmed grass. He experienced different weather conditions, some days windy spring days, overcast winter days and sunny summer mornings. And in his imagination, he visualized every detail of the tee, the fairway, and each individual green. He imagined feeling the grip of the club in his hands. He also instructed himself as he practiced smoothing out his downswing in the follow through on his shot. Then he watched the ball arc down the exact center of the fairway, bounce a couple of times and roll to the exact spot he had selected. And then he would walk to that ball all in his mind. And not once did he ever miss a shot. He never hooked or sliced the ball, and he never missed a putt. And here's the best part. Before his seven years in prison camp, he always golfed in the mid-90s. But after returning from Vietnam, the the first time he set foot on a golf course after his long hiatus from the game, he shot an astonishing 74. He had cut 20 strokes off his average without having swung a golf club in seven years. That's the power of visualization. So if there's something you want to accomplish, I want you to devote a few minutes each day, preferably in the morning right after you wake up and again at night right before you go to sleep, to visualizing yourself achievements achieving that goal. And if you want to ask your manager for a promotion, visualize yourself making the appointment, walking into their office, explaining why you're such a valuable member of the team, listing all your accomplishments, asking them to pay you what you're worth, and then getting the amount you asked for. Now the more you visualize taking these steps and achieving your goal, the more confident you will be and the greater your likelihood of success will be. The same goes if you are nervous about a big speech or presentation you have to give. Spend your time every day visualizing yourself in front of your audience, successfully delivering your message with everyone fully engaged in everything you're saying. You'll feel so much more prepared, comfortable and confident when you find yourself standing in front of a real audience with all those eyes on you. Now my third tip is to boost your self confidence this way is to regularly review your past successes. We often take our past successes for granted and don't realize how much we have actually accomplished in our lives. Unfortunately, failures are often much more memorable. They stick in our minds and replay over and over again, which can cripple your self esteem. But when you consciously choose to focus your awareness on your successes instead, and take time to recognize and acknowledge all your achievements, both the big ones and the small ones, you'll start to show up in the world in a more confident and more positive way. So I encourage you to take time to review your successes at the end of every day and on an annual basis or a semiannual basis. Make a list of all you've accomplished over that time period. It really will make a difference because when you look back over everything you've accomplished, you remind yourself of what you're truly capable of. And that will motivate you to keep on stepping beyond your current comfort zone and growing your capacity to take on new challenges. To excel at an easy way to review your past achievements is to keep a journal of your successes. Every day before you go to bed, take a few minutes to write down all of your wins for the day, no matter how big or how small, and then review those wins before you dive into your work the next morning as a way of reminding yourself that your efforts get results and that you're good at what you do. It's a great way to start your day full of confidence and have a positive attitude with it. Now, my fourth tip is to remember that practicing whatever you want to get better at will also build your confidence. That seems pretty obvious, doesn't it? The more you practice something, the better at it you will be. And the better you are at something, the more confidence you will have. And yet, most people don't practice nearly enough. You know, musicians often practice six to eight hours a day, and that often includes playing basic scales over and over. Frank Sinatra is said to have practiced a song hundreds of times before he finally got the phrasing he wanted just right. Professional golfers will often hit 2 to 300 balls a day. During practice. You can learn a new language, develop a new skill, master a martial art, or become a top salesperson. If you're willing to practice, practice, practice. And one last thing. Remember this. Everything you want is on the other side of fear. Confidence doesn't mean you're never going to feel fear again. It means you're willing to take action despite your fear. Every time you challenge yourself to move beyond your comfort zone and survive that risk, your belief in yourself will grow. And the more you believe in yourself, the more others will believe in you too. As a reminder, I want you to know I release new videos every week, so click the subscribe button and the bell icon to receive notifications when I release new videos. And now, after watching this video, I'd like to hear your thoughts about where in your life do you wish you were more self confident? If you feel inspired, please leave a comment below with your answer. I'd love to read what you have to say, so thanks for watching. And remember, nothing in your life will change for the better until you do. Now, if you found this video helpful, make sure you like it, share it with a friend who may need it, and subscribe to my channel for more videos like this one. And for some additional resources on building self confidence, visit my website@jackcampfield.com thanks again for watching.