"I'm stuck and it's painful" revealing my journal entries during my most difficult periods

I feel stuck. I'm trying. I'm waiting. Persevering. I've read somewhere you can learn to love your work with time. I don't know. It feels like it's going the other way. I'm trying to divert my focus to hobbies, to fun activities, but the feeling of being stuck seems to be getting worse. I remind myself to be grateful for what I have, but I now feel guilty for feeling this way. Maybe it's okay. I've planned exciting trips and activities this year. But this feeling, it's like a shadow constantly there. It has a hold around my neck. It's hard to breathe. I don't get it. I look around and it seems like others cope better than me. Maybe they're happy, more accepting, or just more tolerant. I don't know. But this is too painful. I can't stay here. Why am I struggling to take steps? Overwhelming. And I think I'm afraid. This was the start of my journey. I knew I had to venture into the unknown. The pain of staying stuck became too much to bear as I read these words from the past. I see the tipping point is clear now. But back then, I didn't realize the feeling of being stuck was a signal, not a sentence. It was a sign telling me it was time to shake things up and step out of my comfort zone. Journeys we're afraid to begin are often the ones that lead to the biggest changes. The fear, the uncertainty, the sense of being lost were not signs that I should back off, but a way of telling me I was on the cusp of something important.