[Amrit Sandhu] ​​​​​​​Living An Aligned Life

Welcome to Exit the Matrix Stories of Success with your host Jane Slack-Smith, where we celebrate the incredible journeys of individuals who've transcended their limitations and achieved extraordinary success. Hi, I'm Jane Slack-Smith, host of Exit the Matrix Stories of Success podcast, where we explore incredible journeys of transformation and resilience through those sliding door moments. And I'm really excited to introduce you to my next guest, Emirate Sandhu. And Emirate is someone who lives life out loud. Not only is he a big personality, a magnet who attracts people to them, but he's also got the most biggest smile you will ever see. And he's also pretty loud as well. Emirate and I had the pleasure of meeting at Mindvalley University in Estonia in 2018. And I have to to say he is one of the most amazing, incredible, fun-loving people that I have ever met. So I look forward to introducing you to Emrat.

Hey there, Jane, it is such a pleasure to be here. Thank you so much for so many kind words. Thank you.

Well, I have to give you a little bit of a background to Emrat as well. He's going to go into some of the, the moments that changed his life, but he is also a, um, a very accomplished person. He's a certified Eckhart Tolle School of Awakening coach and Mindvalley Master Certified Trainer for Australia and India. So he believes there is a world where we can all live in alignment to our sacred purpose, and that is definitely aligned to what we talk about here at Exit the Matrix. So welcome, Amrit. Let's get into your sliding door moment. When did everything change for you, and where were you at that time?

My goodness, as we were discussing earlier, there, uh, there have been two sliding door moments, but there was a real The first one was a bit more, uh, intense for me, but the second one feels much more appropriate to what you call sliding door moments. So I'll bring you into the moment. I'm in Costa Rica and I've been there for 2 weeks, and I'm surfing every day, and I've brought along a handpan, which is an instrument that if people don't know, it's kind of like a disc, it's like a bowl with like 8 little notes, very meditational. Um, is that a word? I made it up. Um, and you bet. And I was basically running myself through what we both know from Mindvalley as a Lifebook exercise, which is building out your life's vision in 12 different categories. Um, since then I've kind of got my own take on that process. Um, but nonetheless, yeah, I'm sitting there and each day over the 2 weeks I've been going through one of the categories. And it was very interesting because at that particular time I I was actually invited to come along to Mindvalley A-Fest in Jamaica. And if anybody knows anything about me and reggae and Jamaica, um, that was the one I definitely would have gone to. And somehow I just felt inherently called to not go and just go on a solo trip to Costa Rica. And as you sort of alluded to in your, in your very flattering intro, touchwood, I am like extroverted, outgoing by nature. I love to connect. Connection's my highest value. And so it was a very odd decision to not be traveling to a place where I knew a bunch of people, knew I was going to have a bunch of fun, speaking engagement opportunities, all this sort of stuff. But traveling somewhere completely, like, not completely remote, but quite isolated on my own and just, you know, introvert in, hermit in for a while and just sort of go introspect, introspective. So the interesting thing that happened through that process is, for those that know a little bit about Lifebook, is the same process I run people through, like, yeah, in my own vision process is you start off with your health, then your mindset, your character, and you start to build further and further into, like, you know, your love relationships, your parenting, how your parenting style, what do you want to be like, all this sort of stuff. So you put out a really comprehensive vision for your life. And towards the end of it, there's like, I think it's the 9th or the 10th, is like, it goes into finances, what you want for your finances, and then your career. And at the time I was a structural engineer working in a project management office, basically building high-rise towers here in Melbourne City for a very well-known multinational organization. And yeah, I, I wasn't— to say I wasn't happy in my job, it's actually really a line that you call exit the matrix because what— like I was in my job and now I look back and, you know, 7 years of career misalignment was my second biggest challenge in my life, really. Call it dark night of the soul or what you will. And, you know, as a coach, the breakdown to breakthrough is something I'm fascinated by. And I think it was a necessary breakdown. But you calling the show Exit the Matrix, it's, you know, I say this again and again, it's my favorite movie is The Matrix. And it's in the second movie where Morpheus takes Neo back to baseline reality. Now don't quote me, I think it's the year 3050 or 3000 or 2500. I, I don't know the exact— I really should look it up because I do reference this quite a bit. But Neo takes, uh, Morpheus takes Neo after he's been unplugged back into like, hey, this is what baseline reality looks like now. And he shows him what something that looks like New York City, if you remember the scene, I think. And it's basically the sky is scorched and there's all these dark clouds and there's everything's machine and whirring and mechanical because this is the world as it is now. But you're plugged into the Matrix and you see the beautiful Mother Gaia kind of version of nature that's out there. And, um, and he goes, Morpheus goes, believe it or not, it's human beings that scorched the skies because we believed in our infinite wisdom that if we were to reduce the amount of solar— like the energy of the sun, which gives us life on Earth— we reduce the amount of solar energy coming through, the power for the machines would no longer be here and they would cease to exist. But the machines, in their infinite wisdom, in response to that, discovered that human beings were a great source of energy. Hutchwood. And now human beings are no longer birthed but grown. And then he looks over to his left and there's just these red fields and fields and fields of red pods with human beings growing in that sap with themselves plugged into the matrix. And that's where some people go, it's a documentary, it's a metaphor, like it's philosophical, it's, you know, and I think that's honestly how I felt. I think the interesting thing was, and I joke when I share this from stage a little, but only a little, most people work 9 to 5, 5 days a week. As a young man, I was working 6 a.m. to 6 p.m., 6 days a week. So I kind of just frontloaded all the hours that you put into your midlife crisis. I just joked. I just, I just brought it forward, you know, like I just frontloaded it. But I had that realization. I think, you know, I was paying like, you know, we met in, in Fitzroy as well, and I was paying incredible rent at the time. For a place where I was just there on a Sunday cooking my meals for the week. And I was like, what am I like? This is just not making sense.

Yeah.

And so I literally felt like I was in The Matrix, you know, like I was a human battery cell just getting plugged in to deliver the work that was needing to be delivered and then getting plugged back out. And even at the time, the message in my heart that I've always carried is that your health is your purpose and your purpose is your health. And I don't know where that's come from. I used to think it was just me, but subsequently I've come to learn that even the whole science of Ayurveda at its heart, the entire science of Ayurveda is there to facilitate your dharma, right? So the whole body of wealth of ancient health is there to facilitate your life's purpose. How do we capacitate you to do what it is that you were put here on earth to do? Health and vitality, like, you know, so it's not just me, but that was something that was etched on the inside of my heart. Health is purpose. Purpose is health, right? And so carrying that awareness that health is purpose and purpose is health, and yet being in something that is so misaligned almost was rubbing the cat existentially the wrong way twice over.

Yeah.

So all that to sort of say it was a real challenging period to be so out of alignment.

And I love seeing you say that because a lot of people, I mean, you know, the greatest fallacy is you work, you know, 40 hours a week for 40 years to retire on 40% of what you earn, you know, and there is this misalignment where at some point. And I feel, you know, the purpose of the podcast really is that people go, wait a second, is this it? And that kind of inspiring stories of people like you going, look, sometimes there is a great big awakening. Sometimes there's just this little whisper that's going, I don't think I'm aligned. Like, this is not where I need to be. And you're in Costa Rica, you know, you're playing this beautiful material, you're surfing every day, and you're like, wait a second, Yeah, I'd be an engineer building high-rises.

So that's the interesting thing, right? So it was definitely like you described a death by a thousand cuts in many ways of, you know, and when we talk about alignment, I think it's really important to, for me anyway, just to get clear on, you know, the word alignment. What are you aligning to? And so for me, I'm always aligning people now through my work to their values. It's like, what are your core values? I'm connection, contribution, celebration. So my career was like not a bad career. It's an amazing career. For someone that embodies the values that are, that are expressed through that career. For me, there was no connection, no contribution, no celebration in it. It just wasn't right for me. Right. It's an incredible gig, but not for Amrit. Yeah. So I'm in Costa Rica and I'm punching through like these Lifebook bits, building out a life vision, getting really in. And it was really great also while I'm doing Lifebook because you're seeing like the 12 dimensions of your life And previously, I think when we're just walking around doing the status quo thing, we only really see our life as like the work we do and the money we've got in the bank and our personal relationship. There's like 3 real categories and maybe health, maybe there's a 4th. But when you lay out like my physical wellness, my emotional wellness, my mental wellness, the character that like how I show up with integrity and kindness, you lay all that out. It's like, oh my God, there's all these vials of my life that need filling up. And I could see that because I'd placed so much energy on finance and career, all the other vials— like, I wasn't showing up how I wanted to, I didn't have the time for health— like, they were all being compromised by these other couple of vials. And I realized as I did the career life— we're going to picture that— what my ideal career would be, I realized it looked nothing like what my current career was. And it's almost like I pulled the pin out of that vial and all the— I could see that if I just pulled the pin out of that vial being so elevated, all the other vials across other dimensions would rise and this would come down. Yeah, for the short term as finance would come down as well. But then I could build these back up, but these would sort of, you know, so there was a— the engineer in me was looking at this sort of thing happening and the sliding door moment. Thank you for your patience, everybody. Was I walked out of my hotel room and it was a surf hotel. So I walked out of my hotel room and I'm sitting in the lobby and I kind of— I couldn't integrate. Like it was a lot to digest. It was like, oh, I'm going to quit my career. Like, all roads have led to here and I'm about to give it up. And as I sit down, I'm just sitting on the couch and I'm literally just like daydreaming for a second. I was like, whoa, like, is this really happening? Like, do I have the courage to do this? This guy walks in, sits down opposite me and goes— he's American— and goes, hey mate, you look like you've seen a ghost. You're right. And I'm like, Oh, uh, I think I'm about to— I think I might be about to quit my career. And he turns around and he like beams this big smile and he goes, that's great news! And I was like, and I was like, wait, what? Like, I have an existential crisis over here and you're just like, that's great news? What is going on? And he goes, I've just quit my career. And I was like, oh, whoa. He pulled me out of my story and I was like, tell me more, what's going on? And he's just like, Well, I'm a structural engineer.

Wow.

And I just got an email at my desk one day, come teach English in China. And I was hating my job and I was like, you know what, I'm just going to go to China and see what happens. What's the worst thing that could happen? Like, I go for a couple of years, it's an experience, and I'll say I lived a little. And I'm just on my way through Costa Rica on my way to China. And you talk about sliding door, man. I was sitting here just going to— even to this day, I'm like, did that person really exist, or was it just like an angel? Just like, just popped in to like— because it could have been going anywhere. Like, he could have gone straight to China. Why was he going through Costa Rica? Like, what the actual— and, uh, but no, we chatted, we surfed for a while, we played handpan, we went out for a couple of lunches, we talked a lot more. And yeah, it was, um, it was profound. But that was a real moment for me where it all just really coalesced. That it was possible and that even if I zoom out a little bit, yeah, that it was, it was beyond serendipitous that that person emerged to have that conversation.

And the fact that they're just a little bit ahead of you, right? They've just, they've made the decision and they've just taken the step. And sometimes, you know, what we just need to see is, is proof that you're not going to die. Or, and I mean, as you know, I was a mining engineer, right? So we have these kind of structured ways of logical ways of thinking of things, and then you're doing something that seems completely illogical. It's like, do good at school, go to university, get a good job, marry someone great, buy a house, have kids. It's like you've got it mapped out, and all of a sudden you're going, 'Mm, I'm gonna make a break.' So I'm interested in that break. You've told your family, I imagine, that, uh, you know, 'She's all out. I'm, I'm over this.' Your, your friends, your boss, you know, how did they take that? Was there challenges and obstacles for you to then proceed? Now a quick word from our sponsor, Your Success Club. Your Success Club is a group of vibrant, abundant seekers. If you subscribe to exitthematrix.io, we are going to drop you into the club room, which has lots of goodies, resources, and a free gift just for subscribing. Now back to the podcast.

It's really interesting. So the validation of the person that I probably sought the most was my mother. And at the time she was in a place where she was just like, I can see how unhappy you are. Yeah, go for it, you know? And it was really interesting. My dad was like, dude, what are you doing? What are you thinking? You know, my bosses couldn't really care less, you know? And that was the big thing about the Matrix, right? Like, it's this thing that it's— you'll be substituted by someone else in 2 weeks.

Yeah.

You know, like, yes, I was hardworking and a good worker, but in the grand scheme of things, like, it's, it's a machine, you know, you just pull out a part, put in a new part, off you go, you know. And that's back to the metaphor. So the main people I was discussing this with was my mum and my father. My father at the time was like, no, like, I don't think that's, you know, he's quite responsible, conservative. And my mother at the time was just like, go for it, go for it.

Wow.

And it was interesting because as soon as I pulled the pin, my mum did a total 180, right? She was like, you actually did it? And I was like, yeah, I mean, we've been talking about this for months. And she's just like, she's like, uh, I didn't actually think you were going. What are you gonna, how are you gonna, how are you gonna eat? Like, what are you gonna? And so only then did she start processing all the engineering kind of things that you and I would have been processing the whole way through in the And even that though, we talk about serendipity and synchronicity. I was like, you know what, that was perfect because the moment, like the time I needed Mum to show up the way that she needed to show up, she showed up that way. And then almost I took the second part of it almost like a bamboo in the wind sort of strain hardening sort of process. I was like, now she's really testing whether I belong on the other side or not, you know? And I'm, and I'm strong enough to like, now that I've jumped, I'm good, you know, I can land. So yeah, that was an interesting, definitely an interesting process.

That's beautiful. You know, it's amazing what I found, you know, when I was like, you know, I managed to crack the code on how to do property investing. I'm gonna teach everyone how to do it. The only way I could do it is start a mortgage broking business. And I had this friend who was just so profoundly upset with me and he was going, you know, you've been one of the first female to work in, you know, mining engineering and you're setting this kind of play, you know, trailblazer giving up to be like a used car salesman. You know, you're letting everyone down. And even when I was doing property investing, people like, don't, don't invest too much. And it's, they're doing it from love. Like they're like this, you're going outside the Shire, like you're going out of the safety zone. And I can see it's from a position of love and, and trying to protect you. But it also, it keeps people, you know, bounded to that life. And you know, it's where a lot of people still are.

Yeah, the key thing there is that people are wishing you the best from their worldview, their paradigm, right? And so that's what they know. And, you know, there was an interesting conversation I had with my father even before I took on my, my job, because I had the opportunity to become a design engineer or a construction manager. Right. And the design engineers were getting paid at the time in Australia, I think it was like $80,000 a year and construction was paying about $110,000 a year. And I sat back and I said, look, as a design engineer, I definitely won't be working any overtime. It will be 9 to 5. Yeah, but as a construction, it's 6 to 6, 6 days a week, you know. And I was like, Dad, as a construction— in construction, I'm making about $35 an hour or $37. I can't remember the exact number, but as a design engineer, making about $50, you know, dollars an hour. And I remember chatting to my dad at that point. He goes, what? And I was like, as a design engineer, I make $50 an hour. As a construction, I make $30. And he goes, how much are they paying you per year? And I was like, construction's paying me $110,000 and design's paying me like $80,000. And he goes, so, and I was like, and he goes, so then why wouldn't you just take the $110,000? And I was like, no, because the per hour rate, like my time for value exchange money-wise. And he goes, who thinks like that?

Exactly.

And I looked at him and I was like, I think like that, you know? And then I realized, but this was like not me to sort of buck my dad, but it was like everything he'd worked so hard for, the education he toiled to instill in his son, yielded this response. That was one of the first— again, another sliding door moment. I was like, oh, oh, oh, like you got to step out from underneath the umbrella of your father in some ways because it's like He's provided you with all these resources now, even resources that he didn't have. And now you've got to kind of step up and wield them a little bit. I did end up choosing the 110 because, you know, you end up going, well, okay, you know, right? Makes sense. He knows more of the world than I do, so let's go with it, you know? But in hindsight, I'm not sure if that was the right decision or the wrong decision. Obviously, it all leads to where it's meant to go.

Well, that brings us to now. Like, you've had these sliding door moments— Costa Rica, the conversations with your parents. So, so now, you know, post having made that decision, making that leap, the imaginary person or not who gave you a little bit of confidence along the way. Yeah. How's it all changed for you?

Yeah, so the big thing, and again, this comes back to living in alignment with your values. So everything I do now is in alignment to my values. So I went away, got really clear on what my values were, um, are, which are connection, contribution, and celebration. And if anybody wants to know what their values are, I'm sure you'll link this somewhere for them, but inspiredevolution.com/values or amrit.coach/values. 20 minutes from now, they'll be as clear as I am on their values. And so I look at what I'm up to in the world now, and as a coach, I started off with a podcast, and I didn't know too much about values when I started the podcast. It I'm going to, you know, start a podcast. And it just started to work. I enjoyed it. I was waking up at 3 a.m. to record conversations with people in the US, waking, you know, staying up late to record, you know, conversations with people in the Netherlands. Like it was just happening, you know, and I just found the energy and the gusto and the excitement to do it. And even if it was like early morning rises, I would leave the conversations energized. And I was like, what is this energy? Like, this is what passion is like. What? Is this like, this is so good. I could— and there's like, anyway, that's the name of the book I'm writing called Meta Flow. It's like, you know, the energy that arrives when you're in your flow. But yeah, that to sort of say it was this really incredible process of coming to a podcast and then deducing, okay, why is this working so well? What are my values? And realizing, oh, I'm connection, contribution, and celebration. And podcasting gives me an incredible opportunity to connect with all sorts of people like yourself all over the world. There's a lot of contribution. Hopefully people take a lot away from on the podcast. And celebration— hopefully people live life a little bit richer just for having visited the podcast and the insights and the wisdom that's there, right? And so from there, one of my first audience members said, hey, will you coach me? I mean, I was like, yeah, sure, I'll, I'll give it a crack. I've always wanted to be a coach. Um, and so from there we started coaching, and then that's been a journey of becoming a coach, helping organizations set up their coaching programs. Um, yeah, that's been a very rewarding journey. And then coaching sort of bled— my early coaching clients actually got my first speaking engagements, and that's how I became a speaker as well. So in coaching, there's a lot of connection, really deep one-on-one, a lot of contribution, really deep one-on-one celebration. People live life richer for it. Public speaking, a lot of connection again to a lot of people all over the world, all in all different places, a lot of contribution. You know, it's educational material that I share and celebration. It's always a vibe, you know, when, when I'm public speaking.

Versus construction engineer.

Yeah. Which is, you know, there's not very little connection. Contribution a little bit, like building people's homes a little bit, but it wasn't really the contribution I wanted to have.

Yeah.

And celebration, there was none. So half the value was being met as opposed to 3 of my highest values being met in everything I do. And just the energy of how life feels on the other side. Yeah, it's night and day.

Amazing. Well, I have to thank you so much for sharing that journey with us, and I'm sure people are listening to this going, okay, I need to work out my values. So we're definitely going to drop all of the links, go to ExitTheMatrix.io/s for short, /Amrit, A-M-R-I-T. And before you go, I've got two requests of you. First of all, something for fun. What's something bizarre, interesting, unusual? I know you've got a lot of them that people might be interested in.

I've got a little Japanese Spitz and she's a dog. And I'm not really— I'm not really sure if you're allowed to have your dog in the car with you. Not harnessed, but she has this thing where she sits on the glovebox. Yeah. And so I'll be driving along on the road and there's just this— there's like, she's like, it's like Banjo-Kazooie. I don't know if anybody's seen that video game. Anyway, there's this guy who has this thing in his backpack, but she just sits there. And so I'll just be driving along and my dog's just sitting there and it's like, it's, it's, it's, it's weird and wacky because I'll just be driving and then all of a sudden you'll see someone peer into your car and they— because she's right next to my face, they're like really excited to see me. But then you realize they're not really excited to see you. They're really excited because they're looking at a dog. Yeah. So, um, so that's, uh, yeah, that's a little weird and wacky thing in my world.

And the other thing is you're known for a bit of a call sign. I'm going to have to ask you to call it out. I'm walking across Estonia, I'm in Tallinn, and I'm hearing, I'm hearing you and going, oh, obviously I'm lost, I need to go over that direction. The Siren.

Yes, it's spelled Y-E-W. And yeah, they'd say it's how the podcast on the Inspired Evolution starts. It's like, welcome to the Inspired Evolution podcast. It's just a bunch of fun keeping anything, keeping the energy high. And yeah, yeah, that's a bit of celebration known for that sound. Yeah, definitely a lot of celebration packed into that. Yeah.

Okay, one more. Give it to me again. Oh my, well, thank you so much for being such a wonderful guest on Exit the Matrix Stories of Success. Now, before you go, everyone, please head over to wherever you listen to your podcast, give us a review. Let's hack this algorithm and get this podcast out in front of more people so we can inspire them to live a fully engaged life and a life of value, just as Emirate has shared with us. And when you are there, go also to exitthematrix.io, sign up, subscribe, so I can let you know when we have the next guest. And I'll be sending you a little gift as well. So for all of those who are out there and inspired by Emrit's story, head over to exitthematrix.io/s/emrit, and we're going to give you connection to his values meditation and workshops and even booking a discovery call. So thank you so much, Emrit. Really appreciate your time today. And, uh, yeah, can't wait to run into you some other time in Melbourne or Estonia.

Such a blessing to be here. Thank you so much for having me. This was so much fun. Thank you, Jane Slack-Smith.

All the best. And as always, here's to your success. Bye for now.

Bye-bye, Finlandify! Bye-bye, Finlandify! Bye-bye, Finland!

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