Ep. 82-Mike Ficara: Outsource Your CEO

This is the You Winning Life Podcast, your number one source for mastering a positive existence. Each episode, we'll be interviewing exceptional people, giving you empowering insights and guiding you to extraordinary outcomes. Learn from specialists in the worlds of integrative and natural wellness, spirituality, psychology, and entrepreneurship so you too can be winning life. Now here's your host, licensed marriage and family therapist, certified neuro-emotional technique practitioner, winner and certified entrepreneur coach Jason Wasser.

Hey everybody, welcome back to the You Winning Life podcast. Today I have seasoned entrepreneur and consultant, branding and multimedia expert, outsourced COO. He is a really good friend of mine. We're going to get into the story about how we met. Online and made this bromance into a personal offline 2-year friendship at this point. Ladies and gentlemen, I want to introduce you to my good friend Mike Vaccaro.

What's going on, my friend? Hey, man. Jason Wasser. I'm on your podcast. I know, man. It's been hard. I am not gonna lie. It's been hard to get on. I mean, you know, you got all these really important people on. Well, you know what?

I decided to leverage early on the people that would help me get motivated, that would be a hard yes versus the easy yes. And I know based on our friendship and everything, it's like, yeah, we'll just find a time and we'll do it.

Yeah.

So you're, you're an easy yes. You're easy.

So. And also not important.

And no, not, not, not. And in fact, quite the opposite. Our friendship has been an important part of my entrepreneurial journey the last couple of years. In fact, you've been very much a voice of reason a voice of sanity, a voice of calling me out on my, on my shtick.

Right.

In a way that we get to be raw and honest and really, really— we see each other's stuff and yet we embrace that and love each other for it. And I think that's one of the most beautiful things about our friendship. And I'm really honored to finally make this happen.

Yeah, man, I'm excited to be here. I think I like to say I contributed to you closing down your office. That was, that was my goal when we first met. I'm like, you got to get rid of that thing. And then COVID came And I doubled down on that. That was a goal for me in 2020.

Right, right.

I know.

So, right, you're working from home. I'm working from home. It's been a massive shift, something that to the likes, right, you and I talked about that I never thought would happen where, you know, I grew up in South Florida and my family's here and you've met pretty much all of them. And to have this idea of like going online to be this virtual therapist, this virtual coach was just like, Ah, it's not there yet. It's not there yet. It's not fully baked and society isn't ready for that. And yeah, you're right. COVID did push that environment along because we're seeing what businesses are closing down and which businesses are thriving. And thankfully, you and I are the businesses that are thriving.

Jason Wasser: Yeah. Yeah. And it's funny because I was talking to somebody about that about midway through COVID. I think now we have early on, midway, and is it ever going to end? Are the three stages we're in. But And he called me up, he's like, hey, how are you doing? I'm like, I'm, you know, surprisingly doing well, right? And it's like every LinkedIn message I get is like, I hope you and your family are doing well during these trying times. I'm like, I want to post on LinkedIn, dear everyone on LinkedIn, we're fine.

Right? And I don't want to see if we have synergy. If you're out there and you're using that word synergy in your LinkedIn emails, please stop. You're going to get an automatic no.

Or just stop assuming I'm not doing well, right? Like every LinkedIn message is like some guy thinking that he's gonna like, I'm down and out and he's gonna have the secret recipe, which is, I don't understand if I wasn't doing well, why are Why are you selling to me? But that's a conversation for another podcast.

Jason Wasser: Right.

Have you not looked at any of my last posts? Right.

But back to— and I even lost the train of thought of where I was going with that. But I think in today's world and everything we're doing— and then, oh, I was saying, I was talking to somebody and he said to me, he said— a friend of mine, Daniel Pewter, and he's got a school that he runs and he does a lot of motivational speaking, things like that. And he said, "How you doing? Good?" He says, "Yeah. Isn't it amazing that the people that are doing good in this world?" are doing well. The people that have good, honest businesses and are doing good things. And not to say there's not some people that had good, honest businesses that did suffer because of COVID but it's amazing. And I think it goes back to, we're going to talk a little bit about our friendship core values and the foundations of the business. People that were able to stick to them and had clear direction when the tides and the water got rough. Doesn't mean it was an easy sail, but they were able to navigate that storm. And I think that's a testament to a lot of work done before the storm., you know, a lot of preparation, not even knowing it was coming, you know?

Right, right. As one of our coaches says, it's simplicity on the far side of complexity.

Yes, yes.

Right, that Oliver Wendell Holmes quote, which has become one of my favorites. And I think that's one of the testaments to what you and I have been doing, not just in our friendship but in our businesses, and through our friendship, is reinforcing these principles, reinforcing these core values. Like you said, like, like, it's so funny, like, if my, my young professional classes that I've been giving Like they know, like through their nose, when I answer a question to them and they ask me like, why am I struggling with this? They know the first thing I'm going to say is, have you looked at your core values?

Right.

And that's it. Right. And they're like, oh damn it. I knew it. Right. So, so these things like, like, so let's go into our friendship. Cause this is like so cool because we met online. We met in a Facebook group in the 10X group. And then we both realized that, well, I think you realized that I was going to this Gary Vee day-long Tony Robbins. Whoever else was speaking that day.

Um, no, what it was even before that, remember some guy, like, I posted something and he just started to lay into me, and then you're like, he went all like psychology on him, and it was like this long, like, and I never engaged with anyone on any of that stuff. It was just like someone just being like a troll, and then you got involved, and then we started DMing each other, and then we found out we were going to the GaryVee thing.

That's right.

So thank you, internet trolls. That's what I mean. Keep doing what you're doing. You're creating friendships.

Exactly, exactly. So right, so then I remember, I remember literally, I remember texting you at the event, right? There was, I don't know how many, couple thousand people there. And like you were— yeah, you got there super early, way before me. And, uh, traffic was just insane that day. And I remember like stalking you, like trying to find you and like seeing you. And then like that big hug, like it was like, it wasn't like even like, hi, how are you? I'm Jason. I'm Mike. It was like, like it was this hug and it was just like, that's just like the, the, the beauty of, of our friendship is—

yeah, like we got all the pre-friendship stuff out of the way on the internet. And I think it's, it's in a testament to— and the reason why I think— and you asked me like, what are some of the things I want to talk about on podcast, and I think it's important because I've heard a lot of people, and you and I have even talked about this, right? Before we came on air, we were talking yesterday about events, right? And it's hard to attend them virtually. I think you and I are ADD poor students in high school that need to be in front of people, right? That's where we shine. That's why you do what you do and I do what I do. But it was, in a way, we networked so well pre-event that at the event, we were able to dive into the friendship and the business and the networking and grow deeper. And I think a lot of people, just as soon as COVID hit, stop realizing that they were even doing that. Like, just, you don't have to change. Just keep doing that. Just now, instead of meeting at the event, maybe jump on a Zoom or maybe do things. I think it's funny how in COVID everyone's like, "Well, it's so hard to network during COVID." It's not hard. It's different, right? But we did so much of that earlier on. It's funny. I've been calling it the Mr. Miyagi effect. You don't realize the things that you know how to do that you're good at. And I think people need to double down on that a little bit more. And just once that adversity hits, it's like, "Oh, we can't do it anymore." It's just not true. It's just not the case. Jason Wasser: Yeah.

So what's been the biggest pivot for you? I mean, I know, right, you moved from your formal office to a home office and you built that. But, and obviously the kids being home and then going back to school and all that stuff. But what have you seen from your business perspective, both as an entrepreneur, as a person who is collaborating with multiple, multiple companies in the education field and other businesses, I mean, one of the things that I love about you, right? Again, like this Mr. Miyagi effect that you just talked about, like there's so many things that you and I both share as far as our passion about creativity and our passion about where can we be useful and what's the piece that's missing from someone that we want to help. And we're like, oh, we can see that for you. And I think that's what brings this talent that you and I share to the table. What have you faced in this pivot over the last 6 months from going and traveling and being everywhere. I know you would have to pick up in the afternoon and go fly somewhere and come back the next day. And now you're not doing that as much.

Jason Wasser: Yeah. I mean, first of all, it's despising the word pivot. That was the first big—

I did it on purpose.

I just love that word pre-COVID. I mean, that was one of my favorite words. It's like, I think we need to pivot. And now everyone's just overuse it, but it's an accurate term. Right. And Jason Wasser: I think two things. Obviously, from a client perspective, I've seen clients big and small. I deal with clients that are solopreneurs and big corporations, multinational corporations. I think everybody, obviously, there was a lot of different things. Some clients were like, "Hey, how do we help? How do we go out there and give more?" Some clients were like, "Okay, how do we help our employees but still save our business?" I think there was a lot done. I will say, I think a lot of the What I saw is a lot of companies that prepared and pivoted and adapted, if you will, even if it was overdoing it, succeeded. I talked about this a little earlier. They succeeded and they grow. A lot of the companies I work with, they were like, "Wow, we're having one of our best years ever financially." And it was like, "Yeah." And I was like, "It's because we did A, B, C, and D." And a lot of companies too, it's funny. A lot of clients, we were proactive and like, "Hey, this thing's coming. May or may not be a big deal, but let's plan." And they were like, "Ah, we don't know." We're like, "All right, we'll put the plan in place anyway." And all of a sudden when it did happen, it happened so quick, right? From a client perspective. For me personally, and this is, I think from the being, for those people that don't know, I'm a father of 4. My wife and I, it changed the dynamic from like, there was a real give and take there, I think of, she knew when I traveled, when I was in town, we had a routine. Like I think it worked even with 4 kids, it worked. And all of a sudden overnight I was traveling less. She'd always been home, but I was home, all the kids were home all day. We have a 13-year-old, 10-year-old, a 4-year-old, and a 2-year-old. So the little ones being home wasn't that different, but now everyone was home. I was home, I was working. It was different. I think too, even if you're at the office late, it's different than being working at home late. So now it was where I would come home from the office late, sometimes at 6, 7 o'clock, eat dinner, put everybody to bed, and go back to work at 10. It didn't seem as bad when it was like, yeah, but you've been doing that since 7 in the morning working in your office. Which I didn't have a home office because I really did try to like— not, not that I didn't try to work at home, but I worked in the garage. I had a desk in the garage and smoke in the garage, like smoke cigars.

But it wasn't a formal office, right? There was a different mindset.

I took the first stimulus check and built a— oh wait, no, I shouldn't say that. But I did. I built an office in the garage because it was like, you know, we had a 3-car garage. And it's really, like I said, going back to the office now, you know, fortunately, you have a shared space with my father. So I've been able to leverage that office for other things now. Like you and I talked about, I got some other plans for it, but I really— the home office. But I think the idea of— and I just posted about this on social— is that idea of balance, right? I've been shutting down a lot more earlier in the day because I realized that two things. Number one, I really wasn't getting more work done at night. I really wasn't. And if I scheduled my day properly, I was either able to do these things early in the morning or towards the end of the day. And I've really shut down a lot more. And it's the I think I got into this thing where like I was running and it was easier when you were traveling to like do an online course or read a book or do these things. But like doing it at night from home every day was different. So I've scheduled out a little bit more. I'm, you know, watching TV.

The Cardinal Entrepreneurial says, "I watch TV." Well, your post the other day about that was amazing. Yeah. So could we just talk about that for a second? Because that's so cool. Because we know we have one of our One of our buddies and mentors is like so anti all of that, right? I don't have, I don't have internet. I don't have TV. I don't have like whatever. Right, right, right, right, right. Sunday's about the stock.

I'll tell you that.

Right. But, but you, the one thing that I've known about you from day one was that you're a family man. And, and in the entrepreneurial world, I know people talk about family as if, you know, as if there's a disconnect. And there are people who are amazing entrepreneurs and amazing family people, right? Jesse Itzler, Sarah Blakely are a perfect example of that, about how their family is very much a part of their day-to-day activities and priorities. But it's also one thing I knew even before, because you're the one who introduced me to Jesse Itzler.

Yeah.

And right when I know after you did his BYLR course. And but I know even before that, like, that's been— your family has always been number one. Yeah. For you?

Well, I've always said it's number one, right? Like, like, that's, that's there. And I think even if you look at Jesse and Sarah, I mean, it's funny that you mentioned them because I just saw a speech Sarah gave and him, it was in his stories or her stories, where she said they got married later in life, 38 and 40. No, you shared it. The story you shared the other day was you, um, because you're not married yet, um, with kids.

Is that a problem? Yeah. So now you're supposed to give me a quick plug.

Yeah. By the way, if anyone, if anyone's looking, this episode's sponsored by Find Jason Hawaii. But I think they started later in life, so their entrepreneurial success was kind of already there, right? Jesse had a few ventures, Sarah. And I think I heard her speak about this too. The first time I saw both of them speak, she said how she never thought because of her business, you know, the more successful her business got, the harder and more intimidating it was to meet somebody, which there's probably truth and honesty to that that I don't know because I wasn't in that situation. But I think too, when you're in a marriage and you're growing a business, there's an intimidation there because I don't, you know, say what you will today with gender roles and all that other stuff, um, but you know, I think it's just a marriage is a partnership, right? And there has to be an agreement of, hey, it's your time to grow, it's my time to grow. Sometimes you could do it simultaneously, and God bless the couples that could do it at the same time, right? But, but in, in our case with our family, there had to be a sacrifice, right? Where my wife had to say, hey, listen, I'm going to take on the duties of the home and do that, and you go out and grow and do the things you need to do on your own. It didn't mean it was easy, but there was— there had to be a balance there, and there had to be a presence when I was home. You know, this year my wife went back to work. She's a teacher. She went back to work. The kids are a little bit older. Hell of a year to go back. And I will say that, like, I've stepped up in things like picking the kids up from school or maybe getting them dressed in the morning, or I've been trying to take them— like, where I used to, like, maybe do some work on the weekend, I'm taking that so she could do that. So there's been a pivot, right? And it's really been a big give and take. But I think the important thing is, and the reason why, you know, like you said, The TV, the video games, the family. Yes, everything is that stuff. And we overdo it in our society. We binge-watch, we do all that. But the idea of moderation, and there's value in when all the kids are asleep, could I be taking an online course and learning a little bit more and making a little bit more money for my family? Sure, absolutely. Or could I just sit on the couch with my wife and watch a TV show for an hour when all the kids are asleep and have some bonding time there? That's also important. There's an ROI on that. You know what I mean?

And people don't talk about that, you know, especially if you watch The Bachelorette with her.

Yeah. No, Below Deck. Below Deck is our guilty pleasure. I have no problems admitting that as a man. I love Below Deck. Shout out to Captain Lee. But then, or even my kids, my kids want to watch The Mandalorian, you know, like, you know, all that binge watching, all that, you know, there's shows my sons and I have gotten on Netflix. We've gone to— we've gone to football games and baseball games and even, even sports with the whole political stuff. I know everybody's like, oh, well, this and that. Some people like it. Some people agree with it, disagree with it. You know me, I'm not political online. But at the end of the day, And no matter how I feel about it, which I don't feel it's necessary to talk about, no matter how I feel about it either way, I watch sports with my kids still because it wasn't about what they were doing or saying. It was about that moment with my son. So I feel like we try to take all these outside influences and let them impact the things that allow us to grow as a family. Like sometimes you have to put all that stuff aside. Like is binge watching on Netflix, am I? And then someone may say, well, you're teaching your kid bad habits of like, no, I'm teaching them balance. And you met my kids too. They're awesome kids. And it's not my doing, it's my wife's doing, but you know, I mean, they're still good kids. So yeah, I mean, that's— it's just— and listen, I've done a lot wrong and I've done a lot right, I feel like, but it's just, it's an ongoing learning thing. And I think it's— I just, my thing of it is, and the thing that I frustrate with the entrepreneurial community sometimes is this idea of the extremes, right? Like, it's easy and listen, I'm not knocking anybody and saying, but it's easy for a single man or a single woman to jump on and say, shouldn't be watching TV, you should be all in, you should be grinding on your business. Super easy for you to say that. Of course. If I was single, I'd be a billionaire. But if you have to make these sacrifices, whether it's relationship, whether it's family, whatever it may be, or health.

Something has got to go.

Right. And sometimes it's health and psyche, right? Like how many people are grinding it out and going all in and their health's gone to shit or their mental wellbeing's gone to shit? Like it's like, can I curse by the way?

Yeah. Totally cool.

Yeah.

And I want to talk right now, let's talk about health for a second because that's so important because I know that was our as a healthcare professional, as an integrative mind-body therapist, one of the things that we did was kind of tap into your health because you were being pulled thin, right? Wife, 4 kids, multiple entrepreneurial ventures.

I was being pulled thin in life, just not in my waist.

Yeah.

Right, right, right. But we worked on that. So let's talk about that because there's 2 things. One, like you were saying, we kind of leave something off when we're focusing on, we're going all in on something. So something has to kind of not be paid attention to. What transition, like, for you going through that, because we did some of that work together when we started focusing on that, like, what did that allow you to do differently? How did you start to feel? You know, I usually don't get into this because a lot of people I haven't worked with one-on-one, but you and I have worked together one-on-one. But I know you've also seen where you've gone since then and how much like more focused you've been in a lot of ways.

I mean, I think it was You know, and I think, you know, weight and weight loss and all that and health and all that as a father, you know, I'm not gonna get like, oh, I want to stay healthy so I'm around longer for my kids. I'd be lying to you if I told you that was the reason, right? Like, like, you know, it's just, it's a comfort thing. I think it's a comfort thing of, it's funny because COVID, I haven't had to wear a suit, so I've gotten fatter because I haven't had to tuck a shirt in and be like, oh wait, I'm fat, you know? But, but I think from a health standpoint, I did feel better. I think one of the biggest things of overcoming was two things. Number one, it was habits, right? It was habits. It was risky being Italian. I don't think— I don't have a shame with my weight. Like, I don't feel the vanity of it, but then it's also been something I've struggled with. So I think the NET portion of what you did helped me kind of like narrow some of that stuff down on like what the weight and then the either inability to cope, to figure out what I was acceptable and wanted and happy with. I think even at this point, I'm happier with like gaining and losing weight because of that work that we did on that. But then the The diet, the plan you put me through with the shakes and the binder and all that stuff, it was like an educational process. And it wasn't like, I don't know, like I felt like so many other things were so much like, hey, here, follow this plan. And listen, I'm a firm believer, I tell people anything like diets, entrepreneurship, all that stuff, every diet in America, every diet, Weight Watchers, SlimFast, what you had me do, I forget what it was called, like a keto, keto, keto, fasting, whatever it is, they all work. Every single one works. But you know what the one thing you need to do to make them work?

Do it consistently.

You just got to do it consistently and stick to it. So it's, so it's a matter of finding— so I think what you had given me with that program was so catered to my dietary habits, and it also, you know, it just worked, right? So I was able to— and I started getting underneath 200 pounds. It helped me do that. And I actually gave up pizza for 2 years because I said That was the dietary thing, which was the goal. I'm not gonna eat a slice of pizza until I get under 200 pounds, and your program helped me do it. I found some of that weight again. I lost it. I did find it. But like I said, once again, the work on the NDT side let it not affect me in other ways. And like I said, I think it was important from the goal-setting milestone to know that I can do it, and I know I could jump back into it. But the program you did with me was amazing. It was just amazing.

It's simple because when you hit it on the head, it's any diet, as long as someone doesn't have any autoimmune issues or any food allergies, at a certain point will work. And then people will plateau and hit a wall. But the consistency is, right? It's not a diet. It has to be a lifestyle. Entrepreneurship has to be a lifestyle. It's not a fad. It's not a thing that, right?

Jason Wasser: But I think the important thing is it has to be adapted to you, right? And that's what I was going to add before. You can't take advice as a father of 4. You could take advice from— I think you take advice from anybody, right? I think everybody has something to teach you. Like I don't believe in the adage of like if you want to be successful, get around people more successful than you. Yes, get around people more successful than you and learn something from them. But then also get people who are not as successful as you and figure out why they're struggling. Get around people who are on the same level as you and learn what they're doing different. I think from a dietary standpoint too and entrepreneurship, you have to adapt it to your life. You know what I mean? So like that single entrepreneur saying you have to go all in, you can't do this, you can't watch Netflix, you got to learn, you got to do this, you got to do that. And you have to have like an automated system. Oh, okay. Like, I don't agree with the 4 things you said, but the automated system, that's a good idea. I'm going to double down on that. Doesn't mean the 4 things they said are wrong for me, that it's invalid.

It just may not be the right time.

It may not be—

also doesn't mean—

yeah, it doesn't mean too, because I like the automated system, I have to do the other 4 things they said too. So I think when it comes to entrepreneurship, when it comes to dining, we have to start to learn how to— and I think NET really helped me with this— you have to learn how to personalize things more for you. And when you and I met, I was going through this journey of like, I was like an okay entrepreneur, meaning I had a few successful clients, I was doing well. But I was not, I had imposter syndrome like nobody's business. And I went on this journey to, and I literally always felt like, I think as a teacher, as a teacher, you know, I started my career as an educator. And as a teacher, you're thrown in the classroom and you're like, here you go, go teach, figure it out. So there really is a fake it till you make it aspect in teaching. And I think I always had that. When I got into entrepreneurship, I felt like I had to do the same thing. But what I learned, and I think during that time period when you and I met was I started going to as many conferences as I can talking to Mez and you and been like, I don't, I really don't know who I am and what I do. Well, tell me your story. And I tell my story and they, started to define that for me a little bit. And I think part of the work I did with you with NET and some of the other things was a big help towards that. And I think that's why anyone listening to this that wants to go down that entrepreneurial path, listen to the greats, learn from the Matt Maneros, the Rick Sappios, the Gary Vs, all those guys. But it's a buffet. Take what you need and leave the rest.

Jason Wasser: Yeah. And it's sometimes like even the people that you don't expect that you meet on this journey who are at the same place, they're still trying to figure it out, will give you some incredible insights to that. Like, right, we got to give a shout out to our buddy Pablo. Yeah. So, right, who I got introduced to through you, and he and I have become very good friends. And like, there's so many times where I'll be in conversation with people from our community, right, from our— from the people that we actually, you know, generally talk to consistently. Yeah. Much like, wow, like, they have such a good insight because they are seeing you because the wall is not up with them, first of all.

Yes.

Right. And we're able to be more vulnerable around that type of person and these type of people. And B, like, you know, that it's coming from love. Like, I know, like, and you and I have joked around about this, like, every time that you've called me out, you're like, yeah, but I love you. Like, you know, like, you know, I'm gonna call you out on your crap, but, but, but I love you, you know, so I'm not doing it to be a dick, you know. So sometimes, right, just for fun. But, but I think that's really where I think the entrepreneurial community needs to shift a little bit more, grow a little bit more into, where there's still the salesman mentality. I was at my family's furniture store this morning and someone called and they're like, "Oh, your internet, your website is out of service, technical service or whatever it is." And the assistant asked, "Well, are we— do we do business with you?" And they're like, "Yes." And they're like, "No, I don't think we have an account with you." "Oh, no, no, you don't." Like they straight up lied.

Right?

Yeah.

Right? Yeah. I even had someone, they want to use that tactic of like where they call and pretend like they want your services and then like you reverse pitch them. And I'm like, listen, at the end of the day, honesty wins, right? It'll get you in the door. It'll get you so far. And I think, you know, that win or sell at all costs, you're not going to win. And I was having this conversation with someone the other day because they were like, well, I felt like I needed to get this degree and that degree. I said, listen, You don't need a degree. You don't need qualifications. You don't need referrals. You know how you— in today's internet bubble, you know the only way you could do business with pretty much anybody? There's 3 key components. And I don't care what you're doing. If you can master these 3 components, you could sell, you could do, you could be an expert at anything. People need to know, like, and trust. That's it. And you take away any one of those and you're done. You know what I mean? Because— and I think in today's internet site, that is who people people will do business with. No leg interest. Doesn't matter if the degree's on the wall. That will get the door open for you. Then behind that, yes, you need all the data and all the information, all the certifications and all that. But so many people feel like they need to even step into this. Well, I gotta have, you know, I know I gotta have this degree on it. Listen, you don't, you know, like, you know, I mean, certain things like what you do, yes. Like you can't be a certified marriage and family therapist unless you're a certified marriage and family therapist. But it's not like—

You gotta have the master's degree and the license, right?

An MBA isn't gonna necessarily get you more job offers or more introductions or to know more people. You know, I think there's that balance and that, but to me, honestly, and nowadays that know, like, and trust, those three things. Yeah. Everything else is great.

It's relatability. It's the relationship. And it's the continued connection of like, not just, you know, this idea of bringing value is so again, like, it's like, it's like the pivot, right? It's that cliché phrasing, but it really, the value has to be the genuine relationship, the constant, consistent care about the welfare of the other person. And I, and I think that's one of the things that stands out about you, that, right? And maybe that, right, it comes from, comes from being an Italian, it comes from being a teacher, it comes from being just a genuine person where you have— and that's what you present. And I think that's what's made a lot of your business so successful, is that that's what shows up first.

Yeah. And you mentioned too about the network. I think too, as we start, as you meet people, when you start to get closer to people like that and you start to intertwine your networks, that validation is already there, you know? And I think that's a part of that, more important than growing as an partner and being around successful people. More important is being around people that are of that core value. Like, you know, they talk about in BFS and a lot of the things I think that you've taught me, but the idea of people that fall into that genuine category, that authentic— Alicia, my partner in Branditos, we've been talking about that a lot. That authenticity and being authentic, that's what gets the long-run wins. Not taking a picture with Grant Cardone and paying $1,500 for it. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but that's not— That's not the win. The authenticity of the larger group that you're dealing with on a day-to-day basis, that's where you get the win because the internet will weed, they'll weed it out of you. They'll weed out the Fugazis. They'll see it fast. Right?

Right. And it's the trust factor. And it's, if I do business with you that one time, will I ever hear from you again or you're just moved on to the next thing?

Oh yeah. And listen, you and I talked about this. I'm not going to say whose name it was. I talked to you about it yesterday. I was like, hey, what do you think of this person? You gave me this up. And I'm like, yeah, I was all in. I was about to drop $2,500 with this person like it was nothing. And then the minute— it wasn't a financial thing, it was a scheduling and a time thing. I couldn't make it work out. And then I said, hey, listen, let me know about the next opportunity because I'm in. I just can't make it work out with my schedule this time. Crickets, right?

Yep.

Right. So I didn't know— hey, we understand that. Even a thank you, okay, you know, right, go fuck yourself, something. I got crickets. Yeah. So at least— but now when they come back in with that offer, oh, I thought you were in. Yeah, but last time You didn't even acknowledge that I said I appreciate the offer. I just don't, can't make it work with my schedule. You went crickets on me. But now when you want to sell me something and you think I'm gonna buy something? No, absolutely not. But I've had plenty of people that I've said no to or they've said no to me and I've kept the communication going, check in, send a text, how you doing? They've always asked me, like Martin, Chelsea. I mean, they're relentless in follow-up, but they do it in a way that's authentic, right? I'll say it like Chelsea Matthews is relentless on her follow-up. But she's always authentic. Every holiday, everything. How are you doing? But it's not like, hey, are you ready to buy? Or, hey, do you need this? Yeah. How are you doing?

It's a genuine relationship.

And I will, when I, you know, and I've done business with them for that reason, you know what I mean? So that you have to have that genuineness and that authenticity, you know?

So yeah. So before we wrap up, I know there's a project that you've been working on that we both jumped into this world of podcasting. So let's just, let's talk a little bit just about your podcast. So we can get that out there to people as well. Who's it geared for and who's going to get the most out of it?

Jason Wasser: Yeah. So it's the Startdown Podcast. Startdown.com will take you directly to my podcast page. I called it the Startdown because working in the startup community and the entrepreneurship world, I learned how easy it was to have a startup. It's basically like, "Hey, I got an idea." You don't even need a website. You don't need to register a business. What do you do? "Oh, an entrepreneur. I have a startup." What are you doing? We're pre-revenue. We're pre-idea. We're pre-people. I just know it's what I want to do. So I felt like the startup started to become such a cliché term that it was easy. So I called the podcast The Startup because that's when the real work starts. You know, that's when you start grinding it out and making the business and making things happen. So it's geared towards entrepreneurs that are in the trenches, right? You're building your business. You're getting down there. You know, Gary V talks about the clouds and the dirt. It's about the dirt and being in the work and the work that needs to be done. So I've had guests from all spectrum, celebrities, small entrepreneurs, big entrepreneurs. It's a little bit of me giving my two cents and it's really geared towards that entrepreneur that's in the weeds and wants to grow to the next level, whether that's just starting out. And like I said, I'm not knocking people with the startup ideas or those of you that are at that point where, "Hey, I want to scale and I don't know how." It's geared towards that audience. Jason Wasser: Yeah.

And everything that I've heard from it and everything from our conversations that there is those micro pieces, right? A lot of people do get stuck in the clouds like, "Oh, I want to make this." I'm going to make $10 million this year. Okay, great. But have you made $100,000 first?

Mike Alfred: Right, right, right, right. Or have you even thought about, is this a good idea? I've consulted for a lot of companies and I told this story the other day. I had one lady that came to me. She's like, hey, I've got this business. Can you look at it? I looked at it. I dived into it. And the advice to me, to her was I'm like, listen, I think it's a good idea. I think it's a good business model. You don't have the bandwidth yourself. And to be honest with you, you don't have the passion. I think you need to shut down. She's like, Mike, I love you. And she refers me more business than anybody that I've even help be successful. So, it's sometimes about you telling people like, "Hey, go on the next thing." Because sometimes your first at-bat is not your best, but your 100th at-bat, that's going to be where you—

Jason Wasser: Right.

That's going to be the good one because you're tweaking it constantly. I had that with a client a few weeks ago. She presented me an idea and I'm like, "That sounds like such an amazing hobby." Yep.

And there's nothing wrong with that.

There's nothing wrong with it, right? I just don't know how you're actually going to make money because Where is there a market for that? Oh, but I enjoy doing it. Exactly. That's a hobby. That may not be a business.

Jason Wasser: Yeah. Like I even talked to you, I mean, honestly, I'm doubling down on podcasting next year, but I honestly feel like I'm so green at it and I have so much to learn that it's going to be my hobby next year before it becomes a part of my business. I'm going to learn about it. I'm going to practice it, but then I'm going to monetize it in 2022 because I'm 110 episodes into my podcast, but I'm still learning. But I love doing it, but it is my hobby. It's definitely my hobby.

It's totally fun.

Right.

It's like all the people in my, you know, in Weston who have their like $14,000 road bikes, you know, this is our— Yeah.

I have no problem saying that that's my hobby. Yeah. People spend 30, 40 grand on a boat. You know, I'm looking to invest in podcasting. That's going to be my boat. Right.

It's fun marketing.

Yep.

So good. So one last question before you go. Absolutely. And it's my on one foot question. I haven't asked this in a while actually. Since pre-pandemic. So if you were to kind of gather everything you've kind of learned and all of your wonderful wisdom, and you can distill it down into 60 seconds that you can just share and say, like, before I depart from you, person, I need to share this with you. And if I can share nothing else but this, I know I've accomplished My mission.

Yeah, I think, and, um, you know, my grandmother was a very big influence in my life, and, and I remember, uh, she always used to give everything away to the consignment shop. My mom used to yell at her, "What are you gonna do? What are you gonna do?" When she passed away, uh, you know, there was probably about 4 or 5 of us, very close family, around her deathbed, and then we went and cleaned out our apartment and we pretty much gave everything away. We all kept little things, I, you know, but at the end of the day, she was right. What was important was not the things, it was not the materials and what you remember is not the spaces but you remember the moments and you remember the people and honestly, the people who are going to be there at the end are going to be closest to you are your family. So I think if there's one piece of advice I could give, it's no matter what you do in your entrepreneurial business career, don't take your family for granted and what you're doing in your entrepreneurial and your business career should be a legacy that your family is going to want to tell that story and I think if those two things are kept in balance and it's a very difficult balance, but that everything I've learned has kind of come to that, that success and money and all that is great, but at the end of the day when you pass away, all that will be there is your family and all that will be left is what we've done, what we put out on the internet. That's why I do the podcast. It's not legacy, it's an archive, you know? Maybe my great-great-grandkids will listen to them, maybe they won't, but if somebody wants to know something about me, the information's out there. Do it for that reason and for nothing else.

Beautiful words. Beautiful words. So good. So where can they track you down?

Yeah.

You can stalk me at MikeFachera.com. That is my website. It's got links to all my social media, TheStartDown.com, my podcast, links to the companies I work with and some of the things that I'm doing, and then some other good stuff. But Jason Wasser, man, I can't thank you enough too for having me on. Honestly, you've done an amazing job on the podcast. I know seeing the genesis of this grow and everything else. All kidding around aside, I'm humbled to be on. I appreciate it. And you are doing amazing work with this, and I think you're really helping a lot of people with your podcast. So continue to do that. I really appreciate you having me on.

Thank you. It's my absolute complete pleasure. And I'm looking forward to actually getting some face-to-face time with you.

Yeah, we got to connect soon.

We'll make it happen.

Yeah.

Good. Very cool. All right, bro. Appreciate it.

Thanks for listening to the You Winning Life podcast. If you are ready to minimize your your personal and professional struggles and maximize your potential, we would love it if you subscribed so you don't miss an episode. You can follow us on Instagram and Facebook @JasonWasserLMFT 🎗️