Jason Wasser, LMFT 🎗️Founder, Shevet Collective · Therapy & Coaching for Entrepreneurs, Family Businesses 🖥 Certified Neuro Emotional Technique Practitioner Founder Shevet Collective 🎧Host:You Winning Life Podcast 🎤

You Winning Life Podcast with guest Bobby Harrington "Accountability"

30 Dec 2023 · 1 min

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1:08

In this segment of the You Winning Life Podcast, guest Bobby Harrington discusses the concept of accountability within intimate and professional partnerships. He argues that many couples (and business partners) fail to recognize and own the patterns they bring into relationships, often rationalizing problematic behaviors with vague statements like “he’s always that” or “she’s always that.” Harrington challenges this by asking when the pattern was first noticed and why the partner continued to engage despite awareness, highlighting a tendency to blame external factors rather than assume personal responsibility. He frames the choice as a binary: one can either feel empowered by taking ownership or adopt a victim mindset, but cannot simultaneously occupy both positions. The overall message urges listeners to move from blame to proactive ownership to foster healthier dynamics.

Chapters

The one thing with accountability, and I'm seeing this especially with couples, right, and relationship dynamics, is that— and you can see this in a business setting or anytime where there's two people who are kind of trying to figure out or solve a problem— is, um, the ownership and accountability of what they may not even have realized that we're bringing to the table. And, and, and one of the things I love, um, you know, challenging and pushing back in my— especially with my couples— is like what one spouse will say, or one partner will say, like, oh well, 'But he's always that,' or 'She's always that.' I'm like, 'Yeah, but when did you notice that?' 'Well, I noticed it 6 months in.' 'Okay, but then you went on the next date with them, and then you either proposed to them or you said yes to that proposal. In other words, you still willingly knew this and you went along with that the whole time, and now all of a sudden it's the big issue, right? So where are you?' You know, 'So why aren't you taking accountability and ownership for not identifying that, or, and, or stepping away from that at that point?' So the fact that we have to— that we now as a universe, as a world, are always blaming things outside of us. Like, the context for me is like, you can either be empowered or you can be a victim, but you can't be both at the same time.