Jess Hendrick shares five principles for stronger relationships: stop blaming your partner, know your non-negotiables, embody the traits you want, own your own happiness, and practice daily gratitude. She argues that blame kills connection and that you attract what you become.
Hi guys, I'm Jess Hendrick, Conscious Relationship Coach, and today we're going to talk about the 5 keys to having a fulfilling relationship. 5 keys. So the number 1 most important thing in having a fulfilling relationship is never make anyone else wrong. It's also the most challenging thing It's so easy for us to point the finger and really avoid doing our own work on ourselves and point the finger and say, "You did this, you did that," etc., etc. But unfortunately, the second we make someone else wrong, they have to make us wrong back, and then we're caught in this game of attack, defend, attack, defend. I'm sure you know the cycle. It's pretty loopy. And it doesn't get us anywhere. So never make anyone else wrong. So number 2, it's super important to get really, really crystal clear on the qualities that we must have in a partnership. So really, really clear on the must-haves. So your must-haves could look something like Someone who's compassionate, and what does that mean to you? So go into more detail about what compassionate looks like. Someone who's kind, what does that mean? Is it someone who smiles at strangers? Is it someone who loves animals? What is it? So really get clear on those qualities, and those are your must-haves. You must have those in order to have a relationship with this person or continue in the relationship. And also, we can't forget about our deal-breakers. So what are the things that we absolutely will not tolerate? And if they're there, we honor ourselves enough to leave the relationship. So now that we've mastered not making anyone wrong and our must-haves and our deal-breakers, number 3, super, super important, is embodying what we say. Seek. So a lot of times we can get distracted in looking for, does this person have X, Y, and Z, right? And I would encourage all of us to look in the mirror and really get clear on, do we have those qualities? So if we're looking for someone who's funny, are we funny? Are we looking for someone who's generous? Are we generous? Are we looking for someone who's self-aware? Are we self-aware? You get the picture. So really, by embodying what we seek, we only attract the mental equivalent of what we are in our own consciousness. So that's why doing our own work and embodying what we seek is really a key to a fulfilling relationship. Okay, number 4: really taking responsibility for our own well-being. So we release our partner or any potential partner or anyone from the responsibility for making us happy, and we take that responsibility back into our own hands. And so that can look like asking ourselves, okay, what do I need today to give me peace or give me happiness? And then we give that to ourselves. So we raise our own vibration and the energy that we give off by doing this, and in doing that, we show up as the highest and best version of ourselves in all of our relationships. So taking care of ourselves and taking responsibility for our own happiness and our own peace is absolutely vital to having a fulfilling relationship. Okay, so number 5 is having a gratitude practice. So that can look like writing down in the morning all the things you're grateful for that exist in your life right here, right now. It can be qualities in your partner that you love and appreciate. It could be as simple as having air to breathe or the love you have for your pets. Whatever it is, we want to focus on the things that we have in our life that we appreciate and are grateful for now. And that energy, that vibration of gratitude is very strong and it will pull more good into our lives. But until we appreciate what we do have, we aren't going to attract more. So it's super important and it really changed my life to have a gratitude practice. So these are the 5 keys for fulfilling relationship. Hope it helps!
