People drawn to emotionally unavailable partners often repeat attachment patterns from childhood, shaped by emotional volatility, neglect, or unresolved conflict. While these patterns aren't your fault, you're responsible for recognizing and healing them through self-compassion and personal work.
If we are drawn to unavailable people, or if we grew up in a home where there was emotional volatility, there was maybe a lot of rage or anger, or maybe everything was just swept under the rug and there was a level of neglect, or whatever it was that we experienced as kids, what we'll do is we will tend to seek out subconsciously that same energy in a romantic connection. And so if that's happening with you, have so much compassion for yourself because it is not your fault, but it is your responsibility to heal it, right? So our wiring, our templates that we have that were programmed into our subconscious when we were very, very small create the template for relating as adults.
