Let's JessTalk Radio Laser Coaching Why Live From Lack 11.21.14

The following hour is a real hour of power. This is let's just talk radio. Let's just talk radio with Jesse from Jess talk.com and Lisa from LisaListens.com if you're lost, stuck or challenged in life matters, this hour's for you. The phone lines are open at 702-731-1230. That's 702-731-11230 or toll free 1-866-820-5528. That's 1-866-820, KLAV. Now let's break on the host. Here's Jesse and Lisa.

Okay, okay, okay. Out there in radio land. We are here with a brand new show is something that I believe is going to be very, very powerful and insightful and it's going to reach quite a few people out there. The topic today is going to be why do so many people live from what they don't have rather than from what they do have? Let me repeat that. That's why do so many people live from what they don't have rather than what they do have? We're also, Lisa, going to talk about. Well, we'll have what we call Holiday talk and Holiday Talk basically essentially talks about how to beat the holiday blues. Do you think there are a few people out there that may want to have some insight on that?

Well, I know statistics show that this is the highest rate of suicide and depression and abuse. So I think it's a hot topic to send out some positive vibes that people can focus on when times aren't so good.

Very, very true. There's a lot of pressure surrounding that. In fact, the way you say that you make me want to jump right into that topic for first. But we're actually going to take the first topic first and then we'll get into the holiday talk. When we do get inside of the holiday talk, we're going to have what we believe will be great takeaway points or takeaway moments for the listener. Those takeaway points are going to be the top five ways to kick the holiday blues.

I love that.

Yeah. So we will bring that up a little bit later in the show. So keep listening if you're out there listening. Also, we are going to welcome quite a few call ins today. If they're out there, call in, text in, email in and the ways to do that. Number one, if you're in the local area, 702-731-1230. That call in number again is 702-731-1230 if you're outside of this area and you wanted to have us pay for the call, that would be 1-866-820-5528. Again, that is 1-866-820-55 28. You can also text your messages in which many of you do to at least a listen at 7022-395055-70223-95055. And then finally one more mention would be. You can reach Lisa@lisalisonesttalk.com so Lisa, listen is all one word, as in sugar. S, as in sugar, T, as in terrific. A L K.com we get a number of listeners out there that don't necessarily want to hear their voice on the radio, but they want to be heard and they either have a profound comment or a wonderful question. The last time we had Bruno call in with a question that Lisa, it was nearly a stumper for me and I'm not usually short on words.

That one was definitely one of the all time challenging questions. No doubt about it.

Did you see my eyebrows go up in the air when the question came?

Kind of a Scooby Doo kind of look.

Of course. I muted my, my microphone so the audience didn't hear that. Did you see me try to shift it to James? Hey, James, would you like to answer that? And what did James do?

I think he was equally as stumped, if not more.

Right. Because he said, no, I'll defer to you.

That's right.

But that was just enough time to give me to think about it. No. So the, the callers that call in and the listeners that are listening and texting or writing their messages or, or their questions or comments are brilliant and they really help make the show powerful. So we expect that we'll get some of that today. I do want to do a shout out mention to two incredible businessmen from North America. In fact, they're from Vancouver, Canada out there listening to the show right now. They're in town and they're from Vancouver, Canada. That would be Anthony Ciccone and Mike Cordoba, two extremely powerful global players when it comes to business. I had the fortune of having dinner with them just a couple nights ago at Aria. And you know what was really cool about those two guys?

What's that, Jess?

They paid for my meal that was.

Oh, you can never pass up a free meal. A biscuit for the brother, as you.

Would say by the brother. A biscuit. That is exactly what I say. And I mean that. So, so now, now you almost make me want to Divert into a whole nother story on the buy the by the brother Biscuit. But I won't do that. Now, I'm going to get back to the topic at hand, so let's talk about that. Why do you think it is that so many people live from a place of lack versus a place of, you know, what they really do have?

Well, unfortunately, I think it's. I think the media has a lot to do with it. I think it's our culture, I think it's the way we're programmed, I think it's our default and I think we're patterned to live from a place of lack rather than a place of abundance.

And do you think that comes from this ever present, always wanting and desiring to have more and more and bigger and better? Do you think maybe that has something to do with it?

You mean that keep up with the Jones theory?

Yeah, that could be. That could be. Or maybe even if it's not the Jones, maybe it's your big brother or your, or your father or your mother or your sister or your husband or wife. Maybe we are in unnecessary, unhealthy competitions with other people and circumstances that don't really have any real redeeming value in our lives and we don't realize that that's a pattern, as you say, that's running in the backdrop that's driving that dissatisfaction, that discontentment. Maybe that. Maybe that has something to do with. What are your thoughts?

I. I also think, I really hate to say it, but I think lack of parenting and lack of teaching skills is, Is where it comes from.

It could be. That certainly has that. When you say lack of parenting, think of it this way. Our parents typically do the very best they know how and when they first become parents. It's not likely that any of them has a graduate degree in parenting before they have a child and it's handed down. Oftentimes their parents didn't know any better and then their parents didn't know any better and so forth and so on.

Well, but then again, I'm talking about single parents and you know, the one parent that's working so hard just to put a roof and shelter and food on the table that they honestly don't have time to do the parenting.

Well, you say that, but that's actually one of the. If not lunch, just by meeting bare minimum, which is the survival piece, by putting a roof over your head and having food to eat for you and your children can trump the parenting process.

Well, and look at how fast everything's going. Everything is so fast, we just can't even keep up with it all.

You know, that's actually a very good point. Remember when you were a child and you are on your way to some event or some endeavor and you were riding your bike and you pulled out your. Which phone did you pull out to call your friends to let them know you were coming?

You know, you would just whistle out of your mouth and say, hey, I'm coming.

Right, right. Exactly. There was no phone. In fact, when you got home to make that phone call, how did you make that phone call? Did you just jump on the phone and automatically there was a line open for you to start calling your friends or.

Honestly, I didn't even live with the phone or make phone calls because all my friends live next door. If I wanted to talk to somebody, I'd go out of the house and knock on the door and ask the question.

Okay, well, this is a point about things moving so much faster today than they were than they did in other days. And I agree with you. Well, you had friends next door. I have friends down the street and up and up the street and downtown and uptown and all over the place. So they were not quite as accessible. But when I got home to make a phone call to my friends, there was someone else already on the line.

Right.

It was called a party line. And when I went to try to talk, they would say, get off the phone. I'm on the phone first. So you had to take turns who got the phone? Now, third graders have a cell phone, or even first graders, as far as that goes. But I know third graders for sure have them in their backpacks. So things are moving so much more faster these days. So what must we do to get our arms around it in terms of we're talking about living from a place of lack versus abundance, living from the squared and centered places. And one of the pieces you said is that probably because things are going so fast for so many people and it's so hard for people to keep up, they don't take the time to stop and simply listen, pay attention and respond.

Or how about even just take the time to breathe. You know, Paul T. Tigerna was on the other other week, and he had said, I start every day with a gratitude list. I start every day thinking what I'm grateful for, which kind of shifts the mindset to where it should be.

Well, that's interesting that you say this. The folks that are out there listening will know that this is certainly a program where we don't script this because snuck in one of our top fives without even knowing. But that's okay. It's all good. Because they don't know which top five it was.

Well, and you didn't even share the top five.

That's what I'm saying. This is impromptu. I get to create this and we make it up as we go along.

Well, there you go.

So no, that's. But, but that, that's. That, that. I think that's profound really, what you're saying and is so true. And we'll speak further on gratitude and what the power of that is behind that as we get through the program. But what I'd like to say for right now, if you are out there listening and you want to call in and to make a comment or, or ask number to call in is 702-731-1230. That call in number again is 702-731-12390. If it's toll free, need it, then it would be 1866-8205-5281-8668, 2 0-5528.

And speaking of, I do have somebody that just text a question in, talk to me.

Don't scare me though, because, you know, I want to look good. This is. We're going into the weekend.

All right, this one is from Mary Marriott. It's regarding contentment. Do people take the time to determine if they're content with themselves? Most time people live beyond their financial means emotionally because they're not content with themselves.

Wow, Mary Marriott. That is huge. Mr. Engineer, do we have a drum roll for Mary Marriott and that question she just gave us? That is a brilliant question. And Mary might think I'm stalling for time to answer. That is not what I'm doing. I am actually wanting to award her with that one more time, sir. Do it again. We gotta hear it one more time. That is it.

Ryan is the bomb.

Thank you so much. So it's. So Mary's point is about there's a question about contentment. And so she. So repeat the question one more time so the folks out there listening can hear it again. Then I'll answer it.

Do people take the time to determine if they're content with themselves? Most time people live beyond their means financially and emotionally, because they're not content with themselves.

They don't, Mary. That's the point is I think many people don't take the time to even search for that, which can be an elusive trail called contentment. So let's talk about the components of contentment. What does it actually take to get there? I think the first place, I think it's an inside job. I think so many people, and I'm speaking to Mary and all the other listeners out there are so other people focused, so outside focused, so concerned about shame, blame, and judgment that they spend a lot of time seeking to avoid shame, blame, and a judgment, never thinking that one of the purest ways for them to find contentment is to live in a world of authenticity, is to be authentic with themselves, about themselves and about their lives. I think people miss that. So then they miss. They don't even put contentment on the radar, let alone have a shot at getting it. You're not going to look upon. Contentment is not going to come knocking at the door.

But I also think we need to go back to the basics and live a simple life. You know, contentment can be playing in the park, right?

I agree. I agree with you, but I. But I think I still think contentment starts with self. Assessing self, talking to self about what makes you happy, what brings you joy, what brings you dissatisfaction, what brings you frustration or, or anger or angst or anxiety. Eliminating those negative portions of your life that don't work for you, isolate first, isolate what they are, determine what they are, and strike a plan for how to eliminate them from your lives. Now, it's simple. What I'm saying is very simple, not easy.

And I think a lot of that comes from our childhood.

It does. Well, many of us drag our childhood around, and some of us don't even know that we're doing that. And some of us don't even know that we don't know that we're doing that. Let me say that again. Some of us don't know that we're doing that, and some of us don't know that we don't know that we're doing that, which is further removed from ever being close to isolating what the problem is. So Mary's question on contentment is really, really powerful. I think much many of the people that come through my fingers in terms of acquaintances or friendships or even business relationships, contentment never, ever hits the plate. And I think the reason why is because we skip past self and like I said, go to that other people focus and looking to somehow live up to someone else's standards or someone else's levels or not to be judged or be shamed or in the sense of blaming or accepting that. And I think that's why we miss contentment. I really do. But I think the fact that she Brings the question up, is right on point for why people live from a place of lack versus from a place of abundance.

She has a second part to this.

Oh, Mary's gonna go there, is she? It's gonna be. Let me. Let me tell you, like they say in my neighborhood, it's gonna be like that. Okay, well.

To avoid burnout and say no, focus on family and not on all the hype. Ask yourself what changes if I don't buy this or attend this event? Usually the answer is nothing.

Wow, that Mary is going deep for us today. I love that. Read that one more time.

To avoid burnout, say no. Focus on family. Not all the hype. Ask yourself what changes if I don't buy this or if I don't attend this event? Usually the answer is nothing.

I love what she just said, and she's absolutely right. The one thing I would add to what Mary has said is with the focus on family, focus on self and family. Because you yourself is what you bring to the family anyway, whether you know it or not. You either bring yourself in your present or you bring yourself in. You're not present either way. And it can. It can happen at any time for any of us. But the focus on what matters most is really what Mary's talking about. And there's a thing that you and I talk about all the time about what matters most. Many people don't take the time to even ask themselves what matters most to me. You agree?

I do, I do. And I think that. I just had. Had a thought and I had a brain fart, to tell you the truth. Well, I'm going to come back to that. It was. Say it, woman. What matters most.

Well, I'll tell you what I'll do, is I'm going to give you a chance to think about it. We're going to go on a break right now. Actually, that really wasn't all your fault. That was part of me being a little bit too in your face. And I'm going to put back a bit. Little away from that a little bit. So we're going to top. We're going to stop here for a quick break. We're going to come back and we're going to have your thoughts and we're going to continue answer Mary's question and continue this dialogue. Thank you so much for listening. We'll be right back in a moment.

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