Why Failure Is Good For Success

Foreign.

Well, we're starting this off with laughter. Here we go. So welcome to our conversations podcast, powered by Jesse and Shondell Newsom. There he is. And who's behind the scenes of us coming together up all this. Oh, man.

That. Beautiful, incredible. Ah, Smart, intelligent. Let's see, how many adjectives can I use? Lisa.

That's her. Yeah. She was the catalyst for all of this. So she sees and has seen something in us that we see in one another, but we don't. We take it for granted.

Right.

She doesn't.

We're humble to a fault. Yeah.

We need to have a conversation. That's a podcast. Humble to a fault. Humble to a fault. Give it to me.

We know it.

That's the future podcast. So today is why failure is good for success. Why failure is good for success. We're going to talk about this. This is what is today, August 15th. Okay. Or is this the 16th?

15Th.

Okay. August 15th.

Yep.

Episode 10. And let's talk about some talking points here. When you. Before I read any more of this, when you think about that title, why Failure is Good for Success, let's just go a little bit organic before I jump into some structure on this. Why is failure good for success? What's your perspective on it?

I think, you know, it's just like anything else. Like, you know, I use the analogy for, especially for my youth when I'm teaching them, is it helps you to build. If you. If you have nothing to build off of, then you can't achieve success.

Failure helps you to build. Yes.

Failure helps you to build. Well, one, it forces you to have a dynamic of, I'm going to try harder. Because if it's just a natural success thing, and I'll give you an example is most people don't remember this, but Michael Jordan failed at making his high school basketball team. Where some of those players, they've never felt adversity, and they may have had even more talent than. Than Michael Jordan, but since they never experienced failure, they had nothing to strive for. So they just kind of coasted. And when they got to the NBA, it was like, I can't reach any further. Michael Jordan always remembered that he did not make his high school team. And remember when he went to North Carolina, he was on a team with James Worthy, Brad Dougherty, Kenny Smith. He had all these other great, great players, but he had a hunger that was greater than theirs because they had always had success.

Fair enough. And then it wasn't. When you say he didn't make his high school fame, he was Younger. It wasn't like he was a junior or senior. I want to say that was probably a sophomore year. I don't know for sure, but I think that's what it was. So we have to put some.

But any. But at any rate, he probably felt.

In his mind that he deserved to be on the team. Yeah, I know what that looks like. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You get cut, man. That's a. That's traumatic.

Yeah, it is. Especially. Especially when that's. That's the community, is all, you know? Yeah. And so you feel like a failure in that community.

And even more recent, Stephen Curry.

Okay.

Stephen Curry was not touted to be the superstar that he became. Right. Because of his size. Because of his. And remember, his dad was in the NBA.

Sure.

Best friends. Matter of fact, Shaquille o' Neal is his godfather.

Okay.

Right. Because Dale Curry and Shaquille are best friends.

Okay.

He was disappointed, and he went and said, I have to work harder. So his dad did some things during the summer which improved his game. His left hand, his right hand, the way he shot the ball, quicker release, all of that. Because he felt like, even though he was at Davidson College, he felt like he was a failure to some extent. Because the bigger colleges did not recruit.

Right. So you're saying that failure, being good to success is more than likely an absolute ingredient.

Yes, I would say that.

And do you believe that when people aspire for fame or celebrity or great things or professionalism, do you feel that those that succeed to get to the top levels of their fields or their interests or studies, do you think there's little failure along the way or a lot of failure along the way?

It's a lot, I think. And I think that those folks are not surprised by failure. I'll say that. I think that they expect adversity, and therefore they prepare themselves mentally and emotionally for adversity.

You know, so funny here you say that because it's interesting. You say you don't think they're surprised. Whenever I fail at something, I'm very surprised because I go in with an expectation, I'm gonna own this.

But.

But I don't always own it, but I go in there with it, and when it. When. When I fail, I go. I can't believe it.

Right?

Like, I'm shocked. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No. And, you know, some people are shocked. I am. I am the opposite.

I'm.

I'm like.

You're like, okay, okay.

I expect failure at some point, so I'm disappointed, and I'm shocked that I failed. But I'm also expecting some failure at some point. I'm like, oh, okay, there. There goes that one. Right. Because if you're a baseball player, success at hitting the baseball is batting.300. Right. So that's like, what, almost like a third of the time you're hitting the baseball three out of 10. Right. So that's success. Failure.

That's success at a high level. In that. Yeah. That can position you to go to the hall of Fame.

Right, Right.

For the best of the best. So.

So the disappointment is when you've batted.400, you batted.500 in high school.400 in college, then you get to the pros, and you can't. You can't get over.

200. Right.

So at some point in my mind, I expect that every level, I'm going to be challenged. So I know that I'm going to hit some point of failure. It's not that I'm going to get a base hit every time, because then that's. You're in fairyland. So does that make sense?

I was just gonna ask you. Lisa's right on point. I was gonna ask you. So. So share a failure. And it doesn't have to be the most dramatic failure or it can be. Share. Share one of the failures that you've experienced from. From a young person all the way up to today, even today, where you decided with that failure how. That. What you were gonna do with that, was that gonna affect you negatively, hold you down or keep you down or be the challenge of the obstacle? We're going to get into that a little bit later. Sure. A failure of yours. And then what happened with you and what you did with it. So.

So go on. I can go all the way back to, like, the fourth grade. Fourth grade. I entered. My mom entered me into the national spelling bee, and I did well. I went to state, I went regional, and then I went national, and I felt like I know it all. Then you become a Know it all. Right. You know, I study. Yeah, all right, whatever, Mom. So to me, it was, once I got to that level, all the kids were broke. Like, smart. Right. So by not really preparing myself and thinking, because everything was easy, you were.

Preparing yourself just at a different level.

Right, right, right.

You were preparing yourself. That's not true.

Right.

Especially with the parents that you had. But you were. You were not preparing yourself for that elite level because you had not experienced that.

Exactly, exactly. I've never experienced that. So what it taught me was prepare no matter what. Because once I got the highest level. Yes, because Every. Every level becomes more challenging.

Correct. As it should be. That's the point. Because the reward at the highest levels are much higher than the reward boards at the lower level. So you think that's going to be easy?

Well, you do. I mean, no.

You want it to be.

Yeah, I want it to be easy. So I get into the Nationals, and it's so funny because I get there and I'm like, oh, man, I got this. I got this. And I never even thought about, I need to study this or study that. And then when I lost and was eliminated from the competition, it felt devastating. And then later on, my father was like, but you went to the Nationals. You went to this level. You should be proud of the level that you achieved.

And you said, what?

And I said, I wanted to win.

And he said.

And he said, you did win. So he was. He was balancing out the fact that the full circle. The full circle. The lesson I learned in that, though, was every time you go to a different level, whether it's in business or life, you have to prepare yourself. You have to prepare yourself in a way where you.

You.

Your failure is. Is a bump up, not a bump down. It don't. It doesn't put you in the depression. It puts you in the motivation.

I hear what you're saying. Here's what I said I appreciate as a good story. My thought to that is this. Is that failure in life, in my opinion, inevitable.

Yeah, it's gonna happen. Yeah, I agree. But that's why I said people should expect it. Right.

Failure. Well, you can say that, Chanel. You can say that. People can expect it. And that's not an unfair statement. I do not expect failure.

Right.

I don't. I'm not hardwired that way. I never have been. No matter what, I'm going, whether it's a girl or it's a. It's a job or it's a position or it's. Or it's a. Or a creative development. It doesn't matter. Speaking. Yeah, it doesn't matter. When I decide on a focus on something, I do not think of failure. Do I. Do I fail? Absolutely. So I think this. I think failure is inevitable.

Right.

What you do about it is choice. Yeah. So I think the power is not in failure. I think the real power is what are you going to do about it?

Right.

When it comes about. Yeah. Do you agree or disagree?

No, I agree.

We put a lot of us put a lot of energy in the failing part of it. Yeah. Well.

And I think that it's all perspective.

Of what failure is. That's my point. Let's say this. No matter what the perspective of failure, from the most modest means or levels or measures of failure to the highest, where there's death involved or whatever, at the highest level.

Yeah.

It doesn't matter to me whether it's the modest level or the highest level. Because. Because I like to say things are not as they are, but as you are.

Right.

So depending on how, where you're at, when these failures hit, a modest level of failure could have someone commit suicide.

Right.

You go, that was just a small. Was small to you, but it was big to him at the time. Yeah. So I think the failure perspective is relative.

And let me tell you what I think is, what you're saying too is like you don't expect failure.

I do not.

I don't expect failure either, as a matter of fact. The other thing is you, you can't. Not only do you not expect it, but you don't even have a fear of failure.

I do not.

So that's what the key is to me is like, don't have a fear.

Don't be, don't. What's the point? Am I afraid to fail? No, but what you, what? Let me, you, you'll be good at this. What do you think when I, when I, when failure comes on my scene? You tell me, what do you think I do when I, when it's a, when it's a noted document. Okay, that didn't work, that fail. What do you think I do?

You go on back to the drawing board maybe and analyzing it saying what happened?

I don't quit.

No, not at all. And you know what's funny is we talked about my, my, you know, playing semi pro football.

Right.

The greatest thing that you have to have as a defensive back is you, you, you're covering a wide receiver. You're covering a Tony Gladney. He's taller than me, bigger than me, stronger than me.

Right. And just as fast, if not faster.

Fast. Right. If not faster. So when, if he scores a touchdown on me at that moment, I feel like I failed. I feel like, oh my God, you know, I let him score a touchdown. But now quickly, I have to have a quick, a short memory because I'm going back to guard him on the next couple of plays and then I have to succeed at stopping him again. So that, that fear, you gotta quickly shift from I failed at stopping this guy from scoring a touchdown to I gotta get back on it and I gotta make sure. What, what, what happened Did I go the wrong way? Did I use. Do my feet wrong? Did I jump? Did I not time my jump right? All of those things have to register quickly because I got to get back to defending this guy.

I totally. I told you so. So I'll go on the field with you with Tony Gladney, and I'm on the defense, and he's the superstar that he was. Tony Gladney scores on me, that's the last score he's going to get.

That's it. That's the attitude.

No, no, no. I'm serious. Yeah. I don't care what I got to do. That ain't gonna happen again this game.

Right. Right.

You got one. Something. So to your point, something's got a notch up within you, and quite frankly. And you're saying something else that I want to say and pony in on with you, is that when failure does hit, there's a reason for failure.

Right.

And typically, there are jewels inside of failure. I reach in for the jewels. I want those lessons. I want. I want to. They say whenever you lose in life, don't lose the lesson. I want the lesson. I throw everything else away. That lesson is what resonates with me, and it becomes part of the ingredient to the next level. Leveling up. Yes. You see what I mean?

Yeah.

So for me. I know so. So for me, and I think those of you that are listening and watching this, you will have failure for the whole rest of your life. Yes. And there's some failure that's. Almost all of this is outside of your control. I believe it's part of the design. But I was watching a piece last night. Or poor Lisa. I just told the story on Barbara Eden. Barbara Eden. For my dream of Jeannie and who you. When most of the time, we all have a false sense of perception of celebrity and fame. Celebrity and fame is not what people think it is. It's just. They're just in the spotlight now. Almost everything they do is baseball. Yeah. Documented and recorded, but they're still people. Well, Barbara Eden, who you think is this gorgeous lady and beautiful and intelligent and great actress and sensational program. She has dealt with some failure in her life. Her child. She learned when he was in his 20s that he had been on drugs since he was nine.

Wow.

And then when he got to his 30s, he had a turnaround. He was on the Comeback, and he had this woman that he was in love with. They were about ready to get married. And what ends up happening? He goes to the store, decides to take a hit of heroin. He had been off for years and had a heart attack and died.

Oh, wow.

Yeah. Now, that felt like failure to her. What could she do about that? Those were his choices. Oftentimes when we see people like a Michael Jordan or Tony Gladney or Barb Reeden or any of these names that we name, when people see names that are famous or celebrities, we think success.

Right, Right.

Yeah. Those people have just as many failures as we do.

Absolutely. Right.

So I think that's important to say. So let me. Let me read this. Talk about some of your failures in business. So for me, failures in life are failures in business, professional failures. When I think about failing professionally, again, it just comes as such a shock. And by the way, this is not cockiness or ego. This is confidence. And this is. I'm a big guy on process. I don't mind the hard work of putting it together, pulling together, doing the work of the education or the reading or whatever. I like to consider myself as being a literary pharmacist.

Okay.

Because I love reading.

Okay.

I love. I don't mind that I like doing.

I'm a part of it.

Right.

Reading.

Nerd.

Reading is. Yeah, Reading is just a mental.

I find it. Oh, there you go. There you go. Just a mental. I'm gonna have to use that one. Yeah. Reading is. Leaders are readers.

Right.

And so I don't mind putting that. And so I think. I think doing the work, putting it together and then putting that on stage, I'm ready for that. Okay. But when there is a failure, I'm really surprised by it. But I quickly. I like to live by the concept of I'm either up or getting up. We all get knocked down but don't stay down.

Right.

So a failure for me that I could document was failing to go to the highest levels of hospitality. I felt that I had the ability to be at the highest level of hospitality, running a property or facility or multiple. When I didn't get there, I said to myself, what is the lesson? You know what the lesson was for me? And not getting to the highest levels. I got to my highest level was executive director, which is similar to yours. You know what the lesson for me was for not getting there? It wasn't for me.

Right.

That wasn't. I wasn't. That wasn't part of my path. I could still be in hospitality, aspiring to climb those levels. And what I learned is with what my dedication is and my care to my properties that I work for and the leaders and the people that I serve and the people below me and the People that I'm serving. If this is not enough, then clearly I'm in the wrong place. Yes.

Funny because you had that. It's funny because we were in that same path. Right. But when, when, when the opportunity came for general manager and managing a property and all of that.

Yes.

There was, there was something that came over me that said, do I want that? Right. And, and, and, and you, you were a little bit different.

I wanted it.

You knew what you were going into.

Yes.

So when I left the military and was recruited into gaming and hospital, I didn't know what it was.

Right. Yeah. I've been around my whole life.

I had no idea.

Yes.

That there was this back office.

Oh yeah.

Elevate off to the side that took you upstairs. I had no idea. So maybe one of the biggest challenges that I had was most of the time, military job. Our job was new. Remember I told you it's like video games.

Yeah.

And I had no expectations.

Right.

Of elevating in that space. So failure most of the time for me was a lesson like, oh, why did I not do that? Right. And it was more like, okay, I failed at this, but I didn't really fail at it. It's kind of weird to say that because I got to that point and I made a decision, as you said, I made a decision to say I'm not going. I don't want to do that. I don't want to be general manager or whatever it is. I want to do this now. Or, or God directed me to do this now.

Right.

So it was a little bit different. Like I didn't have aspirations.

There was some crossovers. My aspirations were huge because I really believe that with my, with my education, character delivery and care, who couldn't run a successful property like that, I thought that that was enough. But even if that was enough, what I learned, what I learned the hard way, my failure was that I did not get to the level I believe I was capable of. But my win was it was time for me to discover where to best apply my best gifts and talents. Because this. Clearly I can aim them back at that resource, but I can't come up through the channels of that resource.

How does that help you today? How does that help you as a business owner? As I tell you how it helps you today, or how does it help you?

Because all the journeyman stuff, all the hard work, all the different jobs, all the different elevations, all the over expectations and the high demands that were expected of me that time when I'm serving people now, I understand and know those expectations that others are placed on you. Because I was there, I've done it.

Yeah, there's a jewel to being in hospitality.

Yeah. It's huge. It was a huge gift.

Because your focus is on the people.

Correct?

Right.

Well said.

And I had a, I had a, you know, a conversation on my way over here. Do you focus on numbers or do you focus on people or do you focus on both? I would say that if you focus on the people and their expectations and giving them what they need, want and desire, then you, you have been successful. And the money will come, the numbers will come.

I agree.

Will come Friday.

So I think if you focus only on the number or the numbers as a priority and not the people, I think ultimately you'll lose the people. I think if you focus on the people and their elevation and development and their bandwidth and their autonomy and them bringing their very best, ultimately you'll find a way to pull it all together.

Yeah.

So I totally agree.

Even talking about the thing with like Barbara Eden, as parents, we are always evaluating ourselves.

Oh, completely.

And so, you know, sometimes you see your kids make choices. My kids made choices and many times they often make choices that I have made before. So wisdom comes in like, son, I know, you know what, if you go in that cave, the bear's gonna bite you. Right?

Right.

But don't ask me how big the bear is or how big the teeth that don't go in there.

Right.

Whether it's a cub or a big bear, it's gonna eat you up.

Right.

So understand that I'm giving you wisdom and nuggets from stuff that I, I've done before.

But some people have to learn the hard way.

They have to learn the hard.

Not all of them.

Some because they're hard headed, just like that.

Some.

Right.

Some are. So.

So sometimes as a parent, you say, what could have I, what could I have done different to help my child stay away from the situation? And most, most often, probably not much.

Not much, almost nothing. Because. Because it's their way, their choice, and that's everyone. Everyone learns differently that maybe they might have to learn it the hard way to get it. They may not get if they don't learn the hard way.

But you will evaluate yourself. I agree with man. I could have done this better or did I fail?

Right.

What I did is, you know, after my kids were grown, I got on my knees, I said, lord, did I do everything possible in my abilities to help my children. And the Lord said, now they're in my hands.

Well, you Know, I like that point that you're reminding me of. Two points. The first point I want to make is I want to go back to the high school days and growing up in a small town, Hawthorne, Nevada, obviously, as you well know, there wasn't a lot of things to do. We really had two optimal choices.

Oh, the stoplight and the Johnny Bomb.

Oh, close. No, the stoplight wasn't a choice. You had to honor that or people got hurt. But no, but that's close. Yeah, yeah, that's a guy fomo. But yeah, you're right. There was that one stoplight. So it was either drugs or athletics.

Right.

And my brother was a superstar athlete and I was a decent athlete, but he was a great athlete. There was big gap, major gap between the two. But I, I remember thinking I should have been like Michael Jordan. I thought I should have been on the varsity before I made it. Yeah, my brother made the varsity. Varsity as a freshman. Varsity basketball. He made the varsity on all sports as a freshman. But so in basketball, I didn't make the varsity until I was a senior. Okay, I don't agree with that. I thought I was, I know I was better than that.

Right, right.

But listen, so I make the team now I don't make the starting five. I, maybe if I'm not a starting five, I know I should be the sixth man. The beginning of the season. The first two games of the season my senior year, I'm the sixth man. We get home from Boulder City, Nevada, playing Boulder City, a road game. We get home, I. I never see the light of game again. I become what we call the two minute man. I only get to play in the last two minutes when the game's over. Why? What change? So I want to quit the basketball team. Why do you think I didn't quit?

I think it's more of you're going to prove that you belong or you want to prove to somebody that your abilities can help the team.

I started out with that belief that. My belief was I'm going to prove to that coach, Coach Winters, how wrong he was. And once I started that, on the very first day, I said, I'm not going to prove to him how wrong he is because he doesn't matter. This is his choice to bench me when I don't deserve to be benched. But what I'm going to do is I'm going to prove to myself I deserve to be here.

Right.

So what do you think I did to do that? Just take a guess.

I think, I think just, you know, you went, went harder in practice.

I did. Yeah. You're so smart.

I knocked some folks out, dude.

You're so smart. You're so smart. That's.

I would do that.

That's exactly what I did. I said I am going to punish his so called starting five.

Yeah.

And I, I would wear my game shoes in practice. I didn't wear my practice shoes.

Right.

Because I knew he wasn't going to let me play in the game. So I'm going to play practice like it's the game.

Right. Right.

I'm 16 years old making these thoughts up. And I'm telling you. And I would punish his 35 so bad. You know what he would do every now and then he'd get ticked off at whoever I was on and he would tell us. Because you had the black and gold. The gold. The gold was the starting five. The black was the scrubs.

Yeah.

He would say, Jeff, turn your, turn your jersey over. So I turn over so I have to show gold. He'd turn someone else to go to the black side. So he's like he was kicking him off the starting five and I was now on the starting five. In practice. He would repeatedly do this because I would punish and shut down.

Right.

You were not going to score on me.

Right? Right.

You're not. I'm not going to let you get the ball. Yeah. I would guard him so tight they couldn't even get the ball. Yeah. Right.

That was your motivation.

That was my motivation. Good stuff. So what do you think he did? Game time. You think he played me?

Probably not.

No.

Because you were helping his team get ready for the game.

So I, I. That entire senior season. Yeah. I decided that practice was game for.

Me because that's when I'm going to get the play. That was very intuitive for a 16 year old. That was good stuff.

I'm shutting your. I don't care who he had me guard. He had me guarding people. Six six and I was six one. I don't get his fastest, his strongest muscle. Whoever he had me guarding, I shut down.

But it was actually adding value to the team because now the team was prepared for an animal like you.

I didn't see, I didn't know that then. All I knew was, oh, you're not gonna let me play. I'm gonna play right here. Yeah. I, I'm not. You're not gonna make me quit. Yeah. Because I wanted to quit.

Right.

So that's what failure does for me. Failure. It makes me not only not wanting quit, it makes me go oh, oh, you want. Oh, you want some more? Oh, okay, wait, let me. So.

So that.

And that's. That.

You know what's funny is that's funny because. Because even I give you that. That kind of Tony. Tony Gladney analogy. So what did I do next time?

Oh, you found a way.

Oh, I found a way. So you're not gonna jump on me like I'm a little kid anymore. I'm gonna hold your belt, you know, I'm gonna find ways to stop you from getting.

And he knew.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. He knew because you had this.

You had this conversation years and years later. He said he hated for you to guard because it was real.

Like, hey, you.

But made this guy look like a little kid.

He was like. He was upset about it.

But people need to hear this because people see you, Shondell, and they think you're always been successful, right? They see us. They listen to me. They think, oh, they've always. No, when I haven't always been successful, you know, what. What do you do about it when you're not being.

And I'll tell you. Oh, now, now, I. I hate to fail. That's a fact. All right, so yesterday, my daughter celebrated her 37th birthday. And I put a little post in Facebook and I said, I remember taking her to high school when she was a toddler. One of the things that I wasn't gonna fail at was fatherhood. Even though I was a teenage father, I was like, I'm not gonna fail. And the way that I said, I'm not gonna fail is I'm gonna be involved and engaged. So in high school, I would take her in her little snowsuit. I mean, it could be cold out.

In New York, right?

Taking her little snowsuit, ride those three subway trains, go to high school. My teachers were cool because I was a great student. I was, you know, 4.2. I was very into school.

Because you've been doing that since you were three.

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

It's part of your conditioning.

Exactly, right. But she would sit there with a little coloring book, all of it. Now. Now, the only issue was everybody else got distracted, right? Because she's cool. She's like, you know, I'm coloring, I'm doing my thing. But all the other little. The other students are like, man, I want to play with little kid. I want to play the little baby. And so. But the thing that I was not going to let happen is that was going to be the thing that was going to sink me because a lot. A lot of guys ran Away from it because they were afraid, of course. And in my opinion, they didn't have.

They also didn't have the resources.

Right. They didn't have the resources.

I mean, mental resources, financial resources, economic resources, community resources.

I had all that and blessed to have all that because my father. The first thing he said was, oh, no, we're going to get ready for this. We're going to make sure you got everything that you need. But it was just making sure that not only would I not fail at being a father, but I was going to continue to be that student. So taking her to school and my teachers felt like, well, if that means that you have to bring her. Because some days it was, you know, she couldn't stay at the daycare because.

Sniffles or whatever it was.

So we take her and she sit there. But the biggest thing that I learned from that was don't allow anything, anything to get in the way of you becoming a success. And that's probably what people always see, is that I don't allow adversity to come in and just destroy or cut me down.

No.

And going from a single father with four kids to Arlene and four more, that family of 10 every. The guy who was my transitional counselor from the military was saying, I thought you were gonna fail.

Right.

I had no. I couldn't understand how you were gonna handle this financially, emotionally, spiritually, all of that, because you're leaving a comfort zone of the military base, housing, a pattern, structure.

Structure, absolutely.

A culture.

Yeah.

And now you're going out into the world. That's how he saw it. And I didn't see it that way. I just saw it as. This is a transition. And it's just like. I gave you the analogy of going different levels in the spelling bee. This was just a different level. This was a different place.

Correct.

And what I learned is to prepare. So that was more than anything else, from being in the fourth or fifth grade to. Then everything came back to preparation.

But even with your preparation, Shondell and I believe. But even. Even with preparation and failure, you know the next level is adjustment.

Right.

You prepped. I know you did, but it's even. So. So just because you prepped, how do you know it's enough? Well, you don't know until you either succeed or fail. And when you fail, even though you prep. Now, you said it earlier. Go back to the drawing board. Now you got to go back and tweak and adjust. So when you meet with failure and those about there, those people that are out there listening and watching this, when you meet with failure and it's something that's important, if it's important, you need to get back on the horse and ride again. But you need to figure out what adjustments need to make. You need to adjust what happens. A lot of times when we all fail, a lot of us don't adjust. We take the failure, we live with the failure.

Right?

You and I are not doing that.

And I like what you said. You went into beast mode. Oh, I went into beast mode.

I'm telling you. I'm telling you, I may not be as talented.

He even.

Let's assume I'm not as talented as his so called starting fight.

Right?

I don't care about that.

I'm gonna outwork him.

I. I outwork them.

And you know what? That's what I Honestly, Jess, I think that's what makes you a success in business. What makes you a success in business is that you outwork. I say it all the time. You may be smarter than me, you may jump higher than me, you may.

Be faster than me, but you're not gonna outwork me. It's not gonna happen. Right, and when you say outwork, you mean. You mean work smarter, efficiently, harder, with more alliances, whatever. When I made that decision as a 16 year old on that varsity, I chose, like you said, no one's gonna outwork me, but my intellect is what made me do that, not just my footwork.

Right? Right.

It wasn't just footwork. That was a mental game.

Absolutely. It was the same thing. The transition and from. To the guy, years later, when I came back to teach boots to business, because I teach boots to business once a quarter at Dallas Air Force Base, I'm teaching him how to transition into entrepreneurship. But when I went back and this guy was retiring, he said, I listen to you on radio, I see you on tv. I'm following you now, right?

Because he's moved by it all. Plus he also knows the Genesis.

He knows in Genesis. And he said, what I didn't understand, and maybe you could help me is he said, what I didn't understand was how did you go into an industry like gaming and hospitality and excel when you knew nothing about it? And I said, well, I had to be a quick. I had to again, outwork people. So I had to go in two hours before my shift, start reading about slots and da, da, da, da, da, da. What are we doing? Why does this exist? What's going on? Why?

Who.

Why are people here gambling? I get, I don't get, you know, if you don't get it. Learn it. Like really immersion, just connect.

Yes.

Yeah. And that's really what I do now. Just like, you know, as you know, I have clients like the rtc. I don't have to become a transportation expert, but I have to know enough.

Yes, of course. To be able to have that language. Right.

Otherwise you can't help them. Right. So I can't sit in a room and they're talking about.

You should say that. I love that. Because we say we cross over all over the place.

Yeah.

Lisa and I, when people ask us how we get paid. Yeah. We say we get paid three ways. The first way we get paid is when we get a chance to connect with a client or prospect, whether it's speaking from the stage or in our group coaching or online program, whatever. We get an opportunity to take someone that has a challenge, whether it's trying to go from bad to good, from off the grid to on the grid or good to great. Great or great and sustainable, whatever. Yeah. They allow us. We get the opportunity to help them with their progress and process and we to see that evolve and see that grow. That's the highest payment we can get. Right?

Right.

The second form of payment we get is when we come into, like you just said it, when we meet a doctor, an attorney, a psychologist, a therapist, whatever, a female that is not in our wheelhouse. We got to go and gain some intelligence and language and learn and read and some case studies and so forth. We got to get up to speed, language wise, to be able to have a conversation. When they talk to us, we know what they're saying so that we can.

Help guide so you're not lost.

That's the second way we get paid. The third way we get paid would be what we call a fee arrangement, typically direct deposit. And the priorities for us is that first, helping other people grow and evolve. Second, second, learning. We get paid to learn. We have to go learn to be able to speak their language. And third, we get the dollars to keep being able to do this. Yeah. That's the way we look at it. Just like you did. So what you said about your baby girl growing up, it reminds me as I switch from that to business, as Lisa asked us to talk about business as well. We've said this before, but we created a brand new program called the Breakthrough Success Plan between Lisa Farrell, Lisa oh Shaper, our partner and myself. Up to now, we've got going into 2500 hours of designing this plan. And this plan was designed from 43,000 coaching hours of seeing what people typically have challenges with and putting together a nine module, nine week course that hits every one of those, starting with self.

Right, Right.

And we didn't guess. Yeah, we, we know for a fact because this is stuff that we've used to help other people succeed. So we know it's a winning program.

Yeah.

We put. We're close to probably. We're probably close to 17, $18,000 of investment in this program. How many programs you think we sold so far? I mean, guys. Zero.

I was gonna say zero, but I didn't want to bring it down.

Zero. Shondell. That's wise. Shondale, do you think that's failure right out of the gates? Nah.

You know what?

I, I zero. This is what I'm doing 2500 hours.

Right.

$18,000.

You know, I'll tell you this. Here's, here's what I look at. Right.

You gonna buy the first program?

Absolutely. But here, here's what, here's what said that caught me and sparked me because I go back to our next level class. We did like an impromptu. You and I, we sat down.

Yes.

Remember that?

Yes.

And I recently met with one of those students.

Students.

And they said what was so powerful was the way you guys inspired me to. On one of those days when I was down.

Wow.

And so to the. The correlation is you inspire somebody, somebody is going to walk away with something. And sometimes, and we always do want business to equate to a monetary value.

Right.

But sometimes it's going to be bigger than that dollar. And then later on that dollar comes back full circle.

Absolutely.

If it makes sense.

Yes, it does.

So failure again teaches us a lesson. Like, because I feel the same way. Like, well, man.