Expanding Your Weight Loss Time Frame

Expanding your weight loss timeframe is really important because most likely you are giving yourself this much time to lose weight. And anytime you compress your timeframe into a small one, it starts to add a lot of pressure that is unnecessary and unhelpful. So when you expand your timeframe, all of a sudden you ease a lot of pressure off. Now, I will be straight with you that you need to increase patience. So I'll be— I get that that's another side of the equation. But let's take a look at what having a short-term time frame has done for you. What kind of results has it produced? Because a lot of times we're really impatient to lose weight and we think about how much weight we can lose in a little bit amount of time. But when we look backwards, That is actually a better starting point for what time frames we should be expecting. And what I mean by that is that we want to start with the number of how long have you been working on your weight? How long have you wanted to lose weight and been attempting to do so? How long has it been? 10 years, 20 years, 30 years? How long has it been? Okay, so we take that number. Which is probably in the decades. And now we compare it to how quickly you want to get results. Right. And so what timeframe do you expect to get results in? Think about it. Right. Probably weeks. Maybe months. Certainly not years. And so we have decades versus days and weeks. And that is where the problem starts. To get the results you want is going to take longer than you think it's going to when you do it in a sustainable, normal, non-overwhelming way. If you do really extreme things to try and get the fastest results possible, you can do that for a little while, but you can't keep it up. And so every time you think about changing your weight, you start thinking, how can I get results In a couple days, in a week, in a couple weeks, and you're making it way harder on yourself. There is no reason you have to think in that time frame. You've been conditioned to think in that time frame from diets because every single diet ad is showing you how much weight someone lost in what period of time. And so you start to create your own timeline in your head. It's a very short one. But it's the wrong one. And to put it in a metaphor, it's kind of like you're trying to deal with your weight by running a sprint. You think about weight loss like it's a sprint, when in reality managing your weight is like a marathon. Because if I ask you the question, how long do you want to stay at your goal weight? You're probably going to say forever. So if we look backwards and we say, okay, I've been trying to lose weight for decades and we look forward and we say, yeah, I want to live at my goal weight for the rest of my life, for as long as I possibly can. Don't you truly have a long-term timeframe already? It's there. But every time you think about losing weight, you shrink that timeframe and you say, I better lose weight next. Okay, here I go. I'm going to do keto this week and I better lose a decent amount of weight by next week. By next Sunday. And if you don't, what happens to your motivation? What happens to your mindset? Well, we know the answer to that. So the answer to this begins right in the beginning of the process by giving yourself more time, expanding the time frame, not worrying about how much weight you lose this week, this month, but starting to look and see how much can I change my weight over the next year? How can I set myself up to live at my goal weight 5 years from now as well? How can I continue to be at my goal weight 10 years from then? And as soon as you shift that time frame, almost instantly what ends up happening is you start thinking of longer-term strategies. Because counting calories, restricting calories, not eating for a long period of time each day, cutting out macros. These are short-term strategies. These are things you can do intensely for a little while and you can't keep it up. But things like slowly eating more fruits and vegetables, slowly starting to cut down the sugar consumption, slowly starting to cut out the processed foods, slowly starting to drink some more water and weaving that into your routines, slowly starting to get better at sleeping more and better quality sleep. Slowly start moving your body more and weaving that into your life. And as you start to strategically start implementing these things into your life with a focus on the long term, you set yourself up for long-term success. And success— because success is not losing weight and then putting it back on. Success is getting to your goal weight and staying there. And very, very, very few people ever are able to diet their way to their goal weight and stay there. So that's not a good strategy or path for success. And one of the easiest ways to start changing that is to give yourself a bigger time frame, expand it so that you can see the bigger picture and make decisions focused on that. It makes all the difference in the world. Now, if you want to go deeper into this way of thinking, click the link in my bio. If you're on TikTok, you can click the picture in the top left. You'll see the link in my bio. Click it, go get the free hypnosis session that I made for you. If you are on Facebook, you can just type mind, M-I-N-D, Into the comments, and it'll automatically send you a link to go get that session. And if you're somewhere else, you can go to programyourselfthin.com and go get that hypnosis session. Not only do I give you the hypnosis session for free, I also made a training for you called Reprogrammed: How to Live at Your Goal Weight Without the Fight. It's about 20 minutes, take you through the entire approach that I'm talking about here in detail and show you how to use it. And I also send you an email program to help coach you along with this different way of thinking, and all of it's free. So go check that out. If you have any questions, feel free to Ask them. I hope everyone's having a nice day. How's it going, Debbie? And Debbie says, I've been doing this since I was about 14. I'm 67 now. Yes, and then that's pretty much the norm. I would say that that is the norm. Most people have been working on their weight and trying to lose weight for decades. And the big thing I want to show you is that by consistently for 50 years focusing on short-term hacks and diets and Things like that causes you to never get the results you want. That's my point. So because because people look at program self-defense, say, "Well, yeah, but I could do this over here and lose weight faster." I don't argue with that. I don't disagree. But will you lose it as long? Will you actually learn how to live at your goal weight? And that answer is usually no. And this is what I mean. I can't tell you the number of people I've worked with that have been attempting to manage their weight for decades and decades and decades. And really are no further along. And this is what I say to you to try and prove that the dieting approach just does not work. It is statistically proven to not work. I mean, it's just ineffective when something works for 5% of the people. That's not a good strategy. And every day I get on here and try and convince people of this. It's not convincing so much. You know, I understand the reason I get on here every day is because Um, you know, we live in this culture where all of us have been inundated with, bombarded with diet messaging, diet marketing. And, uh, you know, it's hard to think straight when it comes to our weight. And that's why I'm here every day. Uh, what's up, Dorothea? Dorothea says, hello, enjoy your information. Well, thank you. Yeah, I appreciate that. Um, I'm here every Monday through Friday too. So pop on here and ask your questions. Um, I have been doing this professionally for over 20 years. I'm one of the highest paid hypnotists and weight loss coaches on the planet. Uh, I have done over 6,000 private weight loss sessions, and I'm the creator of the Program Yourself Thin, uh, system. So I get on here every day, Monday through Friday, because this is a mission for me. Um, for me, weight loss is so much more than just how you look, because, I mean, my story really started officially, I would say, when my dad died of a heart attack. He was 54, I was 9, and Um, that instantly showed me the importance of diet, lifestyle, you know, how you're living. And, um, I've been really obsessed with it ever since. But, uh, that obsession did not prevent me from putting 50 pounds on when I was almost 20 years old. And so I have dropped over 50 pounds and kept it off for over 30 years at this point. And so again, my focus is not on how to lose weight quickly, but on how to lose weight long-term. Yeah. How to live at your goal weight, and that that's the the difference in focus. What's up, Felicia? Felicia says I lost 110 pounds over 40 years ago, kept most of it off, but need your help getting off 15 pounds. Interesting. Right, and she goes on to say I'm 68 and finally realizing my mind has more power than diets. Thank you for helping me remember this. Yeah, you're welcome, Felicia, and great job. I mean again, what an accomplishment to. Um, drop, you know, 110 pounds, uh, you know, and to, to drop 110 pounds and put 15 pounds on puts you in the top half of a percent of people that want to lose weight and that are able to keep it off. So I think before we get into the 15 pounds, um, I think, you know, you owe it to yourself to really steep yourself in what you've been able to accomplish. It's unusual. It's an outlier thing, and you should feel proud of that. Okay, and so you start this 15-pound journey that you want to go on from a place of power and confidence and success and certainty rather than a fixation on, oh my God, how can I get rid of this last 15 pounds? I did. I just got to lose this 15 pounds. What's wrong with you? You did so far. You did okay, but now you can't lose the last 15. No, start to realize, holy shit, you know, I did all this and I put 10% of the weight back on. How can I drop, you know, 10% more of that weight? And again, the other thing I would focus on too, I'd reframe the goal. I'd reframe the goal from wanting to lose 15 pounds primarily to wanting to live at X amount of pounds. So whatever your weight is minus the 15 pounds you want to drop, I would start to focus on living at that weight. And that's a big difference. I suggest this to all of you. I would suggest reframing your weight loss goal from I want to lose X amount of pounds to I want to live at X amount of pounds. When you think about losing weight, what you're doing subconsciously is referencing your overweight body. I think about it to make sense of I got to lose 50 pounds. You have to be the I you're identifying is the 50-pound heavier version of you. Okay, and now again, this is all happening in the background. You don't think of it, but every time you think I got to lose 50 pounds, you're imagining yourself overweight. You're always thinking yourself as the overweight person. So in Program Yourself Thin, this is an inside-out approach to change. And we begin right away, um, with the identity, with the goal that we don't want to lose weight. We want to live at a certain weight, and we want to live at that weight because at that weight we're the best version of ourselves. So in Program Yourself Thin, we take your, your goal weight and we wrap it in personal development. So it's not just a weight on a scale that you're aiming towards, but it's a quality of life, a way of being, um, that you're aiming towards. You're aiming at being the best version of you so that you can have the best quality of life. And then we can drill down and get specific so you can have the best relationships. Whatever relationships are most important to you, you can have the best relationships. Whatever, you know, if work's important to you, can do the best at work, be most productive, most efficient at work. If being a parent's most important, this would be the most, the best parent. If you're in a relationship, to be the best partner. So whatever is important to you in your life, we want to use this process of getting our weight under control and being the healthiest, happiest version of us. In order to also become this version of us has the best quality of life in the areas that matter most to us. Does that make sense? So we're upleveling the goal because weight's not enough of a goal. If you have wanted to lose weight for 40 years and haven't done it, I'm here to tell you that that goal is not motivating enough. It's proven. It's official. Stamp it. Motivation is a very specific thing. You're either taking the actions to get the results or you're not. And most dieters are not taking the actions To get the results they want, they're thinking about the actions they think they need to take in order to get the results they want. And thinking about losing weight all day is not motivation; that's just mental rumination. There's a difference. Okay, motivation is what you do every day. Motivation is when you get up to you know feed your kids when you're exhausted. Motivation is what gets you to go to work when you just want to sleep in and don't you know don't want to go to work. So is there motivation to lose weight or not? And for most dieters, the answer is no, which is okay. But you've got to realize that because if you're skipping a step, which most dieters are— most dieters are skipping the motivation step and they're going straight to the process. They say, I, I need to figure out a diet that works for me. Oh, look, here's a diet. Well, let's talk about your motivation first. Are you really motivated? Because it usually doesn't matter what the diet says. It doesn't matter if you're going to try and Not eat for 16 hours a day, or not eat carbs, or restrict your calories, or count your points. None of those things really matter if your motivation isn't enough. If you don't have the right motivation, any of those processes are gonna fail you. And that is probably what you've experienced. You've tried lots of different things, and it's always the same result that you go back to what you always do. And part of that is motivation, and part of that is the programming you have. But both of those things come before the plan, and so dieting has kind of put it in the wrong order, and it confuses people. And what ends up happening is most people get very apathetic, and they start to blame themselves. They don't blame the process; they don't blame the diet; they don't blame their mindset necessarily. They blame themselves. There's something wrong with me. I can't do this. And they look at their experience of trying these diets and failing. And saying, see, but they're not looking at the deeper level of how is your motivation? How is your mindset? What is your programming? These are all levels underneath the plan. And if you never recognize those levels, you never pay attention, we never fix them. Well, what'll happen is you'll just continue to get the same results that you've been getting. Hope that makes sense. So Carolyn, Carolyn says, great info, all new mindset for me, 63-year-old obese overweight all my life, loving the hypnosis, the book, all incredible information. Nice job, Carolyn. Yeah, and that's the fun part too, you know. This is again, that's the perfect example I'm talking about, that yes, the weight loss is one piece of this journey we're on, okay? And for a lot of you, it's really important, and I respect that. Keep it important. But why not add the other fun things to it? So for Carolyn, to me, I hope it's a journey of discovery. A journey of who am I and who can I be? You know, and a lot of times that's the more interesting question. And the weight's a piece of that, but not the only thing, because weight doesn't change who you are, really. It really doesn't. I mean, again, we always go back to the stat here that 85 to 95% of dieters that get to their goal weight put the weight back on, which tells us that just getting to your goal weight does not fix the problem. You know this too, but you've got to recognize it because you know again what most people do is they lose the weight on a diet, put the weight back on, lose the weight on a diet, put the weight back on. And now now we got trouble because now what ends up happening is that even when you start losing the weight, there's this low-level anxiety that you're going to put it back on. And almost every dieter I've ever spoken with, they start with the mantra: I just want to lose weight. I just want to lose weight. I just want to lose weight. And as they start losing weight and they get close to their goal weight. It morphs into, "I hope I don't put the weight back on." Oh shit! I'm terrified I'm gonna put the weight back on. I'm terrified I'm gonna put the weight back on. You know, so most dieters cycle through that—the successful ones, right? I'm not talking about the ones that start for a day or two and then quit. I'm talking about the people that actually pull through and get results that get to their goal weight. That's what they have to look forward to with that approach. I just want to lose weight. I just lose weight. I'm terrified again. I'm terrified again. Terrified again in it. And again, that process leads 85 to 95% of dieters to put the weight back on. So dieting is not a strategy to live at your goal weight, and I don't think anyone would argue that it is. 100 years of diets, there's not one single diet that statistically in any relevant way helps people live at their goal weight long term. So you know if you're feeling like you're confused or you don't have the answers, you're right. You don't have the answers. You've never learned how to live at your goal weight. You've never even framed it that way. You've been fixated and focused on losing weight as fast as you can. You've never asked the question in your life, how can I get to my goal weight and then live the rest of my life there on near autopilot in the most comfortable, enjoyable way possible? You've never asked that question. And because you don't ask that question, you don't have those answers, those strategies. And so you keep trying dieting, but dieting is, you know, The wrong way. Dieting is you know running east looking for a sunset. It's just it's not part of that plan. So yeah, nice, nice. So yeah, Felicia says, ah, thank you so helpful. I'm listening to your visualization daily. That's great. Yeah, again, that visualization, that hypnosis session I give you all is free. All you have to do is again you can type mind M I N D into the comments if you're on Facebook. And if you are on TikTok and just click the little picture of me on the top left, it brings you to the bio. There's a link right there. Again, completely free session, all yours. Go check it out if you want it. I also give you a training. I give you an email program that people have been loving. I'm really happy to have put that together. And once again, I don't think there's anyone that gives you more free information and valuable. I think, I think it's the most valuable information out there. Of course, I'm biased, but Um, yeah. Gets Away From Me says, I kept sleeping enough. I kept sleeping and I farted so loud I shattered the windows. I read stuff like that sometimes and I always wonder, like, if if that person like literally typed that in or if they just copy and paste that into just like lives all day long. I love stuff like that though. Uh, anyways, uh, Rhonda— what's Rhonda saying? What's up, Rhonda? Rhonda says, hi Jim, just wanted to let you know that I am living at my goal weight for about 4 months now. When faced with food choices, I ask, is this food choice in alignment with my sustainable lifestyle? I am decluttering my mind and throwing about any thoughts that do not support my new identity of a healthier person. My faith has strengthened me through this process to surrender to freedom and discard the lies that held me captive for many years. Thank you for helping me get out of the shame and guilt cycle. Rhonda, that's, that's beautiful. Thank you. I, I tell you, you know, you just remind me— and Rhonda, I don't know, you may have, so forgive me if you did, but did you fill out the story request I sent? I would love to hear your story in more detail. You're quite a writer, and I love the way you phrased all that. Um, boy, yeah, that's what I love. I was reading all the stories I sent out a request for, um clients of mine to, uh, send me their stories, you know, and reading through them, it's, it's so— it's, it's very moving, you know. It's just, it's so exciting to see this process really helping people in such a deep way. Um, and it also makes me realize that people— the way people describe it is, is so, so awesome. Usually a lot, a lot, honestly, like better ways that I could describe it. And I just think that's wonderful. Yeah, Rhonda, I mean, that's And when we hear Rhonda, what Rhonda said there, it's, it's so much deeper, dude. Suddenly there's very little about weight there, you know. And again, the weight is important. Please understand, everything I'm teaching you is focused on you being able to live at the weight you want to live at. But the secret is that in order to live at the weight you want to live at, you almost have to make it secondary, you know. I hope that makes sense. And there's a lot of reasons for— I could go into all the details about it, but I'm just kind of, can't, you know, just Take my word for it, I guess, that it's like when, um, if you make it all about weight loss, there's just so many reasons why that actually has counterintuitive effects on you. It's just not helpful. And, and please know, you— I don't have to prove this to you. You've already proved it to yourself. You may just not see it. But if you look at— if you look at how much you think about losing weight If you think about how much effort you've put into losing weight, the way you've done it, like obsessively wanting to lose weight, obsessively wanting to look better, obsessively listening to podcasts or reading things and trying to do it. You've, you've done so much thinking and effort and all the rest of it, and it hasn't gotten the results you want. And if you've been doing that for 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 years, it would really probably be beneficial to take a step back and question, is this approach I'm doing working? I feel like I'm motivated. I feel like I want to lose weight more than anything. But let me, let me separate from that feeling for just a second and let me look at my results. Let me look at my history. Do my results match up with what I believe and feel? I feel like I want to lose weight more than anything in the world, but I'm still overweight and I have been for 30 years. You see what I mean? There's a disconnect there. There's a disconnect. And I'm telling you that the core reason that disconnect exists is because you're not really motivated to lose weight. Surprise! You think about losing weight 24 hours a day, but that is not motivation. You're not motivated to lose weight. That's why you're not losing weight. It's the number one reason. There's other reasons, but the biggest reason you're not losing weight is because you're not Motivated. Does that make sense? I hope it does. So you said, well, how do I get motivated, Jim? How do I get really motivated then? Well, you need to think of this differently. You need to give this process more meaning. Looking better is not enough meaning to you. That's why there's not enough motivation. That's why you're not getting the results you want. So we have to give this process more meaning. The way I do it is to take the weight goal and wrap it in personal development. So it's not just about the weight on a scale or the size on the clothes. It's about you living the best quality of life that you can. That's a bigger motivator. Come on, voice. That's a bigger motivator, I think. Patricia says, I'm 73 and my niece chose me to be her maid of honor next May. Being overweight, I've always avoided the camera. Well, I'm motivated, 3.5 stone already away, but the change in mindset is so helpful. Took a few weeks off from being on track, almost reverted back, but I had a plan to restart on November 1st. Slipped back in with ease and lost 4 pounds the first week, although I hadn't listened to your podcast while I was off plan, so I listened to all the ones I'd missed, um, one after the other. It was like taking in an audiobook. Thanks, that was truly motivational. That's awesome, Pat. Or Patricia, I don't want to short your name on you. Um, that's so great. I'm proud of you. And, um, boy, what a nice— what I, what I really take out of what you wrote is that you just, you seem very even-keeled. Um, it seems even-keeled to me. Oh, um, screenshot this. I like this screenshot just in case. I just love my little testimonials. Oh, I got too many testimonials. I don't know what to do with them all. I got so many testimonials, I don't know what to do with them. I was like, I'd make a booklet or something, give them to people that wanted it, put them all on a web page. I don't even know. I'm not sure what to do with them. Um, yeah, if anyone's got any questions, feel free to ask them. Any weight loss questions are welcome. Um, you know, do you think you're motivated? Do you think you're not motivated? Could you use more motivation? You think the problem is you just don't know what to do? What are your biggest weight loss questions? You know, but yeah, great job, Patricia. Proud of you. And again, you know, I think what you're dealing with right now is really the most important thing because I think that the ability to get back on track, I think, is the number one skill you have to develop to live at your goal weight. Because again, dieting— the idea is that you're going to start your diet and just be perfect. Right? And it's a really— it's not a well-thought-out idea, right? If you really consider dieting, what you're gonna probably find is that you think about it as a temporary thing. You're like, ah yeah, I'll diet until I lose the weight and then I'll figure out whatever, you know? And most people rarely do that, you know? Um, Hillary says, hey, is the mantra workbook available printed? Um, no. It's not at this point, but I keep getting people asking me for it, so maybe I should, uh, make it printed. Um, I've thought that, so I don't know. I kind of— I'm cooking something in the background up, um, and part of that may be to print up the mantra workbook. I don't know, but right now it's not. So the best thing you could do is get it, um, download it, and if you want it printed Go get it printed over at Staples. I mean, what is it, 55 pages? It costs a little bit. Printing is not like it used to be, you know. Frances, where can I find your schedule for the live sessions you have? Um, live sessions— I'm live every day Monday through Friday here, right, noon Eastern. Um, Tuesdays sometimes I'm a little bit later, but I'm live here every day, Monday through Friday. And if you're talking about the Monday and Tuesday program classes, the class on Monday and a live Q&A on Tuesday, that would be in your— well, I don't know, because it was moved. It's in the Thrive program. So that's not part of the Program Yourself and System. So. If you're in Thrive though, you can go to the Circle app and it's right on the left navigation, and you'll get emails on the days before as well. But I'm getting the feeling maybe you're not in Thrive, and if you're not, then yeah, then that's not—you wouldn't have access to those calls, and so that's why you're not getting info on when they are. But if you're interested in the Thrive program, shoot me an email and I can get you a link. You can. Learn about it. See if it's something for you. Yeah, Carolyn says decluttering my mind—that part's so great too. Dieting—I used to always be thinking about food. Exactly, exactly. Dieting is a pretty unpleasant experience for most people, you know, and that makes things hard. So, yeah, humans tend to not like to do things that are kind of difficult and miserable. Not for long anyways. Um, says, where can, where can I find the mantra? The mantra, I'm not sure TKS means, but, um, the mantra workbook is, is part of the program. So if you're in the program, you can go to the members area and, uh, it's, it's there. Um, it's kind of a bonus I put together, I would, you know, but, uh, a lot of people seem to like it, so I guess, you know, I should probably Sometimes I kind of think like, oh, you know, whatever, it's just— but people seem to like it a lot, so I don't know, maybe, maybe someday I'll put it together as a printed thing. But yeah, if anyone has any questions, feel free to ask them. Any questions about weight loss, eating, um, following your plan, motivation, you know, what are you struggling with? Oh, thanks, got you, Cherry. Yeah, where can I find the mantra? Yeah, um, yeah, again, that's in the— I don't know if you're in the program. If you're in the program, it's in the members area. You go to the bonus section, you'll see it. Um, TKS, I know I'm online so much I should know stuff like that. I'm a bad texter, I will say. I don't really text much, so I'm kind of, kind of out of the loop with like text, uh, what they used to call that shit, lead speak. Lead, I don't know what that means. But anyways, yeah, so weight loss, um, you know One thing too, I've really— it's funny, I'm reading this book, it's pretty good. It's called Fed Up. I'm really enjoying it, actually. And in this book, he— what is he? I forget. He's some professor at Harvard. I forget what kind of professor, but he basically is trying different diets throughout the book. And so he started with the raw food diet. He's moving into the paleo diet. And one of the big points he makes in the beginning, and I couldn't agree more with it, Is he talks about how— now, I don't know this, so I'm gonna just trust him on this one. But, um, it's kind of like he says you want to be like a fox, not an aardvark, meaning that an aardvark tends to think of like one thing in one way. They have the ability to kind of think in one way, so they got one solution that's going to fix everything, whereas a fox is able to think in a lot of unique different ways. And he replies, he kind of compares that to weight loss. And this is kind of a cool way because I've talked about this a lot when it comes to diets. When you think about pretty much any diet you've ever tried or have known about, it's usually built around kind of like one thing. There's always one big idea, whether it's to, you know, restrict a macro of fat, increase protein, decrease carbs, whatever. There's, you know, restricting calories. Not eating for 16 hours, tracking your points, whatever it may be. Pretty much every diet is built around kind of like one big idea, and the idea is that well, if I do that one big idea, I'm going to fix my weight. But that's completely wrong, you know. And so he describes it as saying thinking like a fox instead of an aardvark. To me, I say I think you need a holistic, comprehensive strategy to manage your weight, and I don't think there's any kind of one nutritional. Thing that I would tell you to build everything around. And even if I had to pick the biggest nutritional rule that I think would get you the best results, it would probably be eat more whole natural foods and less processed foods. Right. I think if you really committed to that, you'd get great results. But I don't think most people would commit to that because they don't know how to This is the goal weight pyramid, by the way. This is what we follow in the program. This is um, this is a little bit more than just eating. So when I tell you, okay, eat more whole foods and less processed foods, okay, well we just talked a bit about the eating piece of the pyramid, right? But what about your lifestyle and your mindset, right? So I can tell you to eat more whole natural foods and less processed food, and you can believe it 100%. You say that makes sense. All right, I'm gonna do it. Then you wake up tomorrow and you just feel discouraged. You slept like shit. You went to bed late, you ate right before bed, you feel kind of crappy this morning, and now, you know, your blood sugar starts off low, you're craving something, and you go and eat a donut. So, shit, I thought I was gonna eat more whole natural food. So what I'm saying is, knowing that you should do something and being able to get yourself to do it are 2 totally different things. And as far as I can see, very few diets out there, very few weight loss plans out there really get into the mindset piece. Very few get into the lifestyle piece the way we talk about it, and even the eating piece. This eating routine here is really about you figuring out your own way. So in program yourself, then I don't just give you an eating plan because I don't know you. I don't know what your preferences are. I don't know what your likes are. How am I going to tell you how to eat? You know, you've got to figure that for yourself. And so it's a process. But once you figure out what really works for you now. You get kind of a golden ticket. Now you've got a plan that's customized to you, your lifestyle, your preferences, your genetics. But then you also learn how to get your mindset right and how to get your lifestyle to support you. Because again, you can have the greatest eating plan in the world, but if I start to sleep deprive you, dehydrate you, stress you out, malnourish you or undernourish you, um, stop your movement, get your mind going crazy, You ain't gonna follow that plan, right? I mean, if your mindset's, you know, all kind of backwards and stuff, you're not gonna be able to get yourself to eat. And I feel like it's the missing piece in most weight loss. You know, it's not enough to know what to do. It's it's more important to know how to get ourselves to do it consistently. Right? Cherry says it's hard when you are keeping up with several platforms. Yeah, the platforms. I know on Program Yourself Thin. I mean, as far as the program goes, it's two platforms and they're they're integrated together. So. We have the Circle app, which is on the phone, and the members area, which is actually through the browser, but they're all kind of connected together. And then if you're talking about the platforms of like social media, yeah, I mean, we're everywhere. If I was gonna follow Program Yourself then on any platform, I would probably choose Facebook, I guess, simply because they get everything. They get all the short videos. Um, the lives every day, the replays are there. I'm gonna start posting some other things there as well. Uh, so I think that's probably the best place, you know, but I'm also on TikTok, YouTube, Instagram, um, you know, and I have a podcast so you can listen to that anytime you want as well. What's up, Dorothea? Dorothea says, what helps with the not being food obsessed when you are the family cook and have to think about what next meal is going to be? Um, well, you can be food obsessed, you know what I mean? Like, like, we don't have to not be food obsessed. We just have to be obsessed about the right foods and the right food behaviors. And then so, and I think that's the answer. I think that's a very important distinction. I hope you all hear this because I think it's crucial. Try and stop being obsessed with food and you'll find that it's very hard because right off the bat, your subconscious mind does not understand negatives. So again, if I tell you to get your willpower together and don't think about what I'm about to tell you, okay, get your willpower together right now because I'm going to say something and I want you to not think about it. Are we ready? Play along with me. Okay, don't think about— I gave you enough warning, right? I've given you enough warning. Okay, don't think about a banana. Don't think about a banana. Don't think about a yellow banana. How's that going, right? So a lot of times dieting sets us up to do exactly that thing, right? What does a diet do? Oh, no carbs, no refined carbs, no more donuts, no more chips, no more— right? Has that not been your experience, right? As soon as you go on the diet, is there any better way to crank up cravings and obsessions than going on a diet and then getting obsessed with those foods? Has that not been your experience? Right. So I would rather ask the question not how can I not be obsessed, but I would rather ask the question how can I be obsessed with foods that bring me to my goal weight comfortably and enjoyably? How can I get obsessed with my eating behaviors in a way that feels really good and allows me to live right at my goal weight? How can I be the family cook And still make the foods and eat the foods in a way that keeps me on my goal weight and nourishes these people over here. So what I'm doing to make it specific is I'm asking solution-oriented questions now, right? A solution-oriented question. You know, what you're kind of looking for a little bit is kind of, you know, it's a decent question for sure, but it's more about trying to figure out You know, how to not be obsessed. If you figure it out, let me know. But I think the best way to not— so, so let me bring it back to the banana, right? If I want you to not think about a banana, the best way to do it would not be to say, don't think about a banana. That's the worst way to do it, right? Because it puts the idea of a banana in your mind. So if I did actually want you to not think about a banana, if that was actually my goal, um, I might actually talk about Uh, you know, this water— I, I saw we got a canal down here and they opened up the, the, um, dam, and I could not believe the amount of water that was rushing down, um, there. It was so much water and the power of it was— now again, I'm making something up, but it's completely nothing to do with bananas. So again, therein lies the answer that if we want to not be obsessed with something, the easiest way is to Shift our obsession to something else because our brain wants to get obsessed on things. So the idea that we're going to create a vacuum in our mind with we're not obsessed on anything doesn't work with how our mind is set up. You're going to have much more, um, I think better time moving towards becoming obsessed with eating healthier. Now please understand, it's not becoming like a health nut and an obnoxious asshole. Who will only eat perfect? Please understand, I didn't say that. I said, how can I become obsessed with eating in a way that really works for me? How can I become obsessed in a way of eating that allows me to be at my goal weight comfortably, enjoyably, easily, naturally, almost automatically? Now I know you don't have that answer, but you don't have the other answer either. This question is going to bring you to a much better place. Because I cook a lot of times. I'm the family cook a lot of times, and, and I, I don't have much problem with that, you know, because I'm focusing on certain foods. I'm focusing on certain behaviors while I'm cooking because I've asked that question: how can I, um, create foods for myself and my family when I'm cooking that support all the goals I have? Again, it's a solution-oriented question, and I'm obsessed with it. I'm talking about obsessed. I am obsessed with these questions. Because I keep getting better and better and better strategies and solutions. So what I'm going to say to you is that I lost 50 pounds over 30 years ago, and living at my goal weight now is not only easier than it's ever been, but I'm as motivated and fired up as I've ever been because I'm obsessively always optimizing not just my weight— because my weight's what it is, I've been the same weight for 30 years— I'm optimizing my mindset, my lifestyle, my eating all the time. Because I'm obsessively asking solution-oriented questions about those areas, and it's really fun to me. Like, it's fun. It's, it's, it's no different than playing basketball now, and I just keep getting a little bit better, little refinements. Am I gonna play in the NBA? No. Am I even gonna play at the rec league? No. I just like it for myself. I just like getting better. I'll play guitar, I get a little bit better. I'm gonna perform concerts? Nope. But I just like getting a little bit better, and I think That's one of the key things that's missing from diets is you have this one goal to get to your goal weight, and then there's no goal after that because you just think that, oh, when I get to my goal weight, I'm just going to be so, so motivated and fired up that I'll just stay there naturally. But you forget that you already bet at your goal weight and it didn't work that time, you know. So you need more. You need more. Uh, Carolyn says, I'm an overeater and it must be because I eat fast and I also eat distracted. Often TV. Have tried smaller plates. Any thoughts? Yeah, I mean, the first thing is you're not an overeater. You're a person who overeats sometimes, okay? And that's the distinction between taking a behavior and making an identity. You better be careful if you define yourself as an overeater. You're gonna have a real hard time eating moderately. Does that make sense? If your self-image is that I'm an overeater, I always overeat, I always eat fast, I can't stop myself, tried, can't, doesn't work. Okay, let's see how it goes, right? So right off the bat, I'd say no. You know, it's like, oh, hi, I, I'm an overeater. You know, no, you're not an overeater. You have all these other characteristics. We don't, we don't define ourselves. I hope we don't define ourselves by behaviors we do occasionally, you know. And so right off the bat, I want to be a person who overeats sometimes. Right off the bat, I, I separate instead of like— it reminds me of like, uh, well, I don't know if y'all know Venom. The, like, the superhero shit, you know? But Venom's like this alien from outer space, and he like basically just morphs into this person. They become the same person. And so it's like, that's how I envision— I'm an overeater— just like it morphs into your identity and you become that, you know? So by saying, no, I'm a person who overeats, you expel the alien. You still have to deal with it, okay? Please understand. But at least now you have perspective on it. You don't identify as it. And now we realize it's a behavior, and it's a behavior that I can begin to change because I may overeat sometimes, but I also eat moderately sometimes. I also eat really well sometimes. And as soon as you separate your identity from being an overeater, you're more likely to see those times. And now the conversation changes not from how do I completely change my identity to, um, I already have the identity sometimes of being a moderate eater. It's rare. It's only in that situation, but I've done it, you know. So, so that'd be my first step. But, um, the next thing is distracted eating is not a problem either. And I think a lot of people mistake that whole idea. Yes, if you sit with a bag of chips and you are distracted and you eat fast, you're going to overeat because, yes, there is the body situation where it takes about— it's a ballpark idea, but It takes about 15 minutes for your body when you're eating. It takes about 15 minutes for your body to say, okay, we've had enough. We're good. Okay. So if we eat really fast and if we're eating processed foods that are really quick to eat and we're distracted, yeah, we're probably going to overeat. All right. But I eat distracted all the time. But if I make a bowl of salad and I know I'm going to eat this bowl. Whether I eat this bowl of salad mindfully with each bite, or whether I sit in front of the TV and eat it not even paying attention, it's the same amount of calories coming in my body. So, distracted eating by itself is not the problem. It's distracted eating plus the strategy of eating that you're using. So, that would be a suggestion I would make is you're aware that you're a fast eater. You're aware that you're eating in front of the TV. So, if you're eating in front of the TV, one thing I would probably do Is again, eating in front of TV is not a problem. Eating distracted is not a problem. The problem may be that you have a giant amount of food that you're expecting yourself to just stop eating once you've had enough. Well, that's a terrible strategy. Okay, so take that big container of food, make it a small container of food, sit in front of the TV and eat as fast as you want, as distractedly as you want. That makes sense. You know, there's other things we can do to move forward with that, but that would be my first, my first thoughts on it. Yeah. Uh, yeah, what's up? Off the Beaten Track says adding frozen berries and frozen vegetables is a great way of increasing your whole food consumption. Takes 5 minutes or less to prepare in a microwave. Yeah, I think that's brilliant. I think it's brilliant. I think any way that you start to, um, I think any time that you start to add more whole foods into your, your diet in any way Shape or form, I think is going to benefit you. You know, so so I think that's a great suggestion. Hillary said I couldn't work out a good weekly eating plan, so now I am just making sure I know what are the next two meals seems to be working. How long did you take to settle into your weekly schedule? I don't love that language, Hillary. Now Hillary's in the program, so I'm give her give her a little bit of shit, but I don't love that first statement much at all. I couldn't work out a good weekly eating plan. Couldn't or haven't yet? Couldn't implies that you have hit a finished point and you've defined it as a failure, as opposed to being in the middle of it and being annoyed and frustrated. It's taking long and you haven't figured it out yet. But I'd want to change that language. I haven't worked out a good weekly eating plan yet. If that's what you want to do, you know, again, there's no right or wrong. There's only what works for you. So if doing 2 meals at a time works for you, then, then great. Okay. Remember, it's always what works for you best is the most important thing, the best strategy. Okay. That being said, how long did it take for me to settle into my weekly schedule? It took me years and years to come up with my weekly schedule. Years and years. And it may not have to take you that long because, again, you've got the blueprint, right? So I'm plugging myself then. We have the Goal Weight Blueprint. It's a meaty book. Listen, this part of the program is not, not for, you know, if you just want to hit a button and, and do it, this ain't for you. 144 pages. But there's no rush on this. There's no time limit. But when you fill this thing out, you've got a customized one-size-fits-one plan for you, um, of how to get to your goal weight and stay there. And a part of this plan, basically it's broken down into 3 categories: mindset, lifestyle, and eating. And so the eating piece is really built around, um, you can see it there, structure, right? So we start with awareness of what our routines are, what our schedule is, what our lifestyle is. Um, then we start to structure it a little more intentionally. Um, we, we kind of start with what we do naturally, and then we start to add structure to it, um, where it's comfortable. We always go only as fast as is comfortable. Uh, we start adding some structure to it, and then we start optimizing that structure at the same time. So The adding the structure and optimizing the structure is simultaneous, and awareness as well, that we're always looking to gain more awareness. But I would love to know more, Hillary, why. And Hillary, if I'm not mistaken, you're in the Thrive program, right? You should definitely get on the Tuesday Q&A call. Okay. And I got this week, I got it ready to go, is the ability to ask questions before the call. Oh, that's awesome. And if you're not in the Thrive, then I apologize. You should get in it though, because I'm telling you, we would work on this, you know, and this is really important, I think. I think because I don't know, I know what the next 2 meals are. I don't know what that means. I got to be honest that almost that's the opposite of what we're talking about in here, because part of structuring your eating is first starting and realizing that your eating is already structured. Yes, it is. Even if you think it's not, it is. No one just eats— there's no one virtually— I mean, I'm sure there's someone, but virtually no one just eats totally randomly, right? Like, like one day you're eating breakfast here, the next day you're not eating breakfast, the next day you're eating lunch here, the next day you're eating this. Time's all different, food's all different, places all different. That's just not how people operate. They operate through patterns. And so there's always patterns to our eating, always. And so the first step is understanding those patterns, right? You've got a sense of what the patterns are when you typically eat. You know, once you start to get a general sense of your typical eating patterns, then we pick one or two of those patterns to work on optimizing them. Yeah. And the idea is, too, that we have a bigger picture because Um, having a general— now again, it's not a strict meal plan. I want to make that clear. It's having a general sense. So for me, I've got clean and pleasure days, right? So clean days are basically Monday through Friday afternoon. Pleasure days are basically Friday night to Saturday, Sunday night, right? And what's that mean? It means the intention and the focus is more on the clean days. It's more about fuel, fueling my body. That's the main focus. That's the main criteria. That's the main intention. The pleasure days are more about choosing foods that are fun, that I enjoy. They're not unhealthy. I'm not overdoing it with stuff, but it's just a different focus. Okay. And I think both of those things have to coexist. I don't think anyone's going to succeed who just wipes out fun pleasure foods from their life. I don't think you're going to stick with your plan long. Okay. So I am a big believer that we need to learn how to balance those 2 things. And, you know, this is part of the program is figuring out how to make these 2 work together in the best way possible for us. So the value, though, of looking at a typical week— and we may live that way 100%. If you're really strict, you may live that structure 70%. Okay. But the value of it is to say, okay, these are the typical meals that I eat. How can I make them better? How can I make them easier? How can I make it more enjoyable? And so we look at it from a distance. So we're not just making decisions about what we're eating in the moment. Worst possible strategy, in my opinion. We get a little more distance from it, and now we can start to prepare. We can logistically get the foods in the easiest, most enjoyable, uh, most convenient way. We can have the foods we want there ready to go when we're about to eat them. You see what I mean? So preparation and planning, I think, is crucial. I think structuring your eating— I always say there's no right or wrong to, you know, whatever. Program yourself in. There's no right or wrong. There's only what works for you. The one single exception I would say is I have personally never seen anyone change their weight, um, who has not had some structure to their eating. I don't believe in any way that you can just spontaneously make great decisions forever. I, I have not seen that. There's people that can do it because they've been doing it their whole lives, but if you have been struggling with your eating and struggling with your weight And you want to do that, I think you need structure. I think you need a plan. I think you need to be able to prepare. That's what I think. Patricia says, have definitely committed to eating properly, sleeping like a log every night, and have amazing energy. Actually feel younger, or am I just remembering how I felt when I was younger and weighed less? Eating correctly is a game changer. Great advice. I'm proof it works. Yeah, that's great, Patricia. Super proud of you. And I want you to really Um, Patricia, I want you to really internalize how amazing it is that you got off track a little bit, put a little bit of weight on, and then got back on track. Um, I want you to really reflect on that and learn from it because you'll get off track again at some point. And I want you to really reinforce, um, and remember how you got yourself back on track. And I want you to start to internalize that as an identity, that you're someone that— because I'm like this, I'm not always on track. It's always a variable, you know. Um, and when I'm not off track, I'm not freaking out. I'm aware of it, and I'm kind of plotting and planning to get back on track. But I'm always in the game, you know. And it sounds like you are too, Patricia. Nice job. Oh, okay. Carolyn says, yeah, I think it's a bonus being the family cook. You choose healthier oils, sneak in more vegetables, or some for yourself. I— that's a great way to look at it, Carolyn. I agree, I agree. Carolyn says, yes, that makes sense. That's so true because many eat a lot more than I do, so I guess I'm not an overeater. Thinking on the calorie in, lack of movements to burn off. Um, yeah, but I mean, I would focus, Carolyn, on, um, you know, you know, calories in is always— that should be everyone's main focus. If you care about changing your weight, your main focus should be on calories in, not calories out, not working out. You can't out-train a bad diet mathematically. You're gonna get much more, much bigger return on investment for your energy and focus if you focus on reducing the calories coming in than you will on focusing on burning calories and, you know, increasing the calories out. So, agreed, agreed. I guess I didn't ask my question correctly. I'm not obsessed with what I eat, and I do make healthy meals overall. I'm just tired of always thinking about what to prepare for next meal, so feel that I always have food on my mind in the background. Should I make weekly meal plans? Yeah, exactly, Dorothea. Right. There you go. And I want you to understand, it's not, it's not an attack on you because, you know, that's how coaching works, right? You kind of come at me with the initial, you know, what you think is the problem. And then I kind of come back with some ideas and then you did exactly what you should in this situation. And you say, wait a second, that's not exactly what I mean. This is what I mean more specifically. I say this all the time, that if I had to define what coaching is in a nutshell, that gives the most value to it. It's that someone kind of comes into the conversation with a big vague problem. That, that's what I would say if I did it in a nutshell. Coaching calls in a nutshell, someone comes in with a vague problem and we get more specific about what it is. And as we get more specific and more granular about what it is, that is when the solutions start to become obvious and evident. Because the, the— if you take a big problem like, I'm an overeater, well, how are you going to change that? You know what I mean? Big vague problems come up with big vague solutions. I'm an overeater. What's the solution to that? Stop overeating. Uh, I'm a sugar addict. What's the solution to that? Stop eating sugar, right? So it's like if you ask and identify as a big problem, you're gonna get a big solution, and it's gonna be— it's not gonna do anything. It's not gonna be helpful. When we start to break things down into more granular pieces, now, um, that's easier to do. That's easier to deal with. So, yeah. So now, Dorothea, instead of having a vague, I'm obsessed with food and how do I stop obsessing with food? Now it's a much more refined question of, I am not sure what to make, so I'm constantly thinking about what to make. And you answered your own question because you asked a better question. You see how that works? As soon as Dorothea asked a better question, she herself came up with a solution. Should I make weekly meal plans? What do you think? How would it feel if you had weekly meal plans and/or a list of all the options available to you that you've made and know are hits, and you know how to make them, and you know how to prepare them and get them? If you had a list of all the dinners that have been winners listed, that alone would probably be like, oh yeah. And if you got more optimized and you started to group those meals together so you could start to batch some of them and ease off your work so that you could put a less work in and get more out of meals that you knew you liked, you knew were easy to make, you knew were enjoyable, and everyone else enjoyed them. If you had that list in front of you, Dorothea, would you not be less obsessed? Would you not be more relaxed? Would you not feel better in general? I bet you would. Right. And again, that all comes just from you asking a more specific, refined question, and you came up with your own answer. Yeah, I would absolutely write out some weekly meal plans, you know, but again, don't make them strict. You know, that's why I say I would do 2 things personally. I would write out a brainstorm list of every dinner I've made that's been a hit that I've liked. And again, that, that's— that involves— you can write out a list of everyone that people have liked. Okay, you can start with that general thing, but then you can start to evaluate those. Um, how much did I enjoy it? How easy was it to prepare? How easy is it to get the ingredients for it? And if you start optimizing around those three things, I think you'll feel quite a bit different about your job as family chef. What's up, Karen? Karen says I'm off track now and trying to remember how to get back on. Reached goal weight and stayed for a year. Now seven pounds up. All right. Well, I know, Karen, I know you're in the program. So the first thing I would do is suggest listening to the hypnosis sessions because, you know, it's important to understand the hypnosis sessions really serve 2 functions. And I think the first one is always overlooked. Um, yes, you're getting positive ideas put in your mind, and that's really important. But I believe that the most important thing you get out of hypnosis is that you go into this calm, relaxed, grounded state. Um, a lot of people don't think of hypnosis like meditation. But they're the same brainwave pattern, and it's this very similar physiological experience. So when you step into hypnosis, you calm yourself down, you ground yourself, you relax. All right, and so I would start from that place, and then I would change up my questions. Okay, and I would say I wouldn't say I'm trying to remember how to get back on track. I would say let me take a little bit of time and reflect on when I made these changes initially. When I initially got on track and got to my goal weight, what was my motivation? Now again, if you filled out the goal weight blueprint, you can just go back and reread what you wrote. If you haven't filled out the goal weight blueprint, go fill it out. It'll— that will— that's your answer. That's your simple answer, right? Because what are we going to do, Karen? If you start with the, the goal weight blueprint, the very first thing you're going to go to is motivation. And most likely you need a little motivation tune-up. Not— it's not a problem, you know. Motivation tune-ups are like tuning up our car, rebalancing our tires. It's just something we got to do after we've been driving the car for a while. And the motivation we start the journey with is usually not the same motivation that's going to work midway into the journey. So I would definitely suggest going to the workbook, certainly doing the motivation section. And then, again, I'm 90%, 99% sure you're in the Thrive program. And if you are, get on the Tuesday calls again this weekend. You will have the opportunity to ask questions anytime. So you'll be able to go and ask questions. And I will talk about that in the Q&A. And remember that this is the back and forth we're talking about. That's part of the program is being able to ask something. I come back at you, give me that, and I come back. And it's a, it's an ongoing cumulative process that just keeps clicking up. Get where you get better and better and better. All right, and seven pounds up is no big deal too. So just relax, right? Calm down, relax. I'm up. I'm up five pounds right now, and I'm working on dialing some things back down to where I was. Okay, but I'm doing a calm, relaxed way just because I know that get that's what sets me up for success most effectively. All right, all right, everyone. I'm gonna get out of here. If you're not in my world, please click the link in my bio or go to programyourselfthen.com and go get the free hypnosis session I made for you. It's called The New Thin Me. And again, if you're on TikTok, you can click the picture of me up in the top left and click the link in my bio. If you are in Facebook, all you have to do is type mind, M-I-N-D, and it'll send you a link automatically to get it. And if you're anywhere else, you can just go to Program Yourself, then you can get it through there. And if you like this, I'm here every Monday through Friday at noon Eastern to help you out. So take advantage of it. I Please, I'm here to help you and coach you, uh, and I'm happy to do it. And if you can't make the live and you like listening to this, it's also a podcast. Go to any podcast platform, search Program Yourself Then, um, and/or go to Facebook and you can watch the replays as well. Um, then you can watch them anytime you want. So, all right everyone, have a super duper day. Um, we will talk soon and, uh, goodbye.