The 3 Best Emotions You'll Feel At Your Goal Weight

Right now, but I want you to take some time and think about this because what we really need to do to succeed with our weight is kind of fight apples with apples. And what I mean by that is that the food is the main thing we're kind of dealing with, and the emotions we feel towards the food is the main thing driving us to eat it. So a lot of times we think of the foods that we've kind of got to dial down to get to our goal weight. We think of them very pleasurably, right? You might think about the enjoyment and the relaxation of sitting. on your sofa watching TV, eating ice cream, or the excitement of opening a bag of cookies and eating them, or whatever it may be. There's emotion there, and it's deep emotion. And typically what a dieter tries to do is they try and fight that emotion with willpower. They take the willpower and say, yeah, I know that that's amazing, that feels great, but we're gonna stop ourselves from feeling good. This doesn't work well because your brain is a pleasure-seeking mechanism. It is just wired to seek pleasure. So if you're going to base your weight loss on trying to restrict pleasure to yourself, it's always going to feel like a struggle. And that's exactly what it's felt like to you. It's always felt like a struggle. So to fight apples with apples here, what we want to do is we want to use the emotions of being at our goal weight to fight the emotions of eating the foods that we like. So we're not going to demonize the foods. We recognize that ice cream is enjoyable. It's good and bad, right? We know what the bad sides are of it, but we know what the good sides are. And subconsciously, that is what's driving us to do it. So one way to deal with that is to start steeping yourself clearly in the emotions you expect to experience when you're at your goal weight. So if you take a moment right now and start by just relaxing your body, relax your shoulders, your chest, your stomach. Relax your face. Take a deep breath in and slowly let it out. Just relax. Ground yourself. And now imagine being at your goal weight. And a fun way to do is to imagine it's tomorrow morning. Tomorrow morning, and you wake up and you're at your goal weight magically. We're just going to go right to the end of what you want. I want you to imagine being at your goal weight. You're lying in bed before you even open your eyes. You're lying there. And I want you to think about the day ahead of you. And I want you to imagine being in that body and how that feels to lie in bed before you even open your eyes, to know that you're at your goal weight in that body. And I want you to notice what emotions you imagine feeling. It might be satisfaction, relaxation, calm, gratitude, success, confidence. Whatever emotions it is, feel them. And now imagine yourself hopping out of bed, getting dressed in the exact outfit that you'd love to wear at your goal weight, and notice how it feels to get dressed in that outfit at your goal weight. What emotions do you feel? Excitement, happiness, peace, calm, gratitude. What emotions do you feel? And now imagine yourself moving through your day, whatever you're going to do tomorrow. Imagine tomorrow going exactly the way you expect it to, the only difference being that you're at your goal weight. So things that you do, people you run into, imagine them at your goal weight and imagine and notice the feelings that you have as you think about this, as you place yourself throughout tomorrow at your goal weight in your life. What emotions do you feel? Now, the power of this is that now you've got the emotions of being at your goal weight to put against the emotions that you get of eating. And although it is apples to apples, it's not really, because the more you steep yourself in the emotions of being at your goal weight, the more you remind yourself and remember that those emotions are way more powerful. The thing is, you never get reminded of those emotions. You don't get commercials that do this for you. You don't get nonstop commercials reminding you how amazing it is to be at your goal weight. You get the opposite. You get nonstop commercials trying to tap you and connect you to the pleasure of the food. And so it's unfair. But once you start to consistently reinforce this connection to all the amazing emotions you're going to experience at your goal weight, It starts to become a much different experience because now instead of saying no to the food, you're saying yes to the emotions that you get to experience at your goal weight. So now your brain isn't saying no, I need to restrict pleasure. It's saying I get to have more pleasure. And that is a much more intrinsically motivating concept and setup for your mind to succeed with than the idea that you're going to restrict pleasure. In order to accomplish your goal. So I hope this makes sense to you, and I hope you do it. I hope you give it a little bit more time. If you do this for the next 5 days, it is a profoundly powerful experience. If you do it beyond that, it's even more so. But if you want some help in this process, click the link in my bio, um, or go to programyourselfthin.com. Or if you're on Facebook, you can just type mind, M-I-N-D, uh, into the comment window, and it will send you a link, and you can go get The free hypnosis session that I made for you, which will help you go through this process a lot more powerfully. The session's called The New Thin Me, and it's designed to help you step into you at your goal weight. It's you kind of connecting to that reality, and the more you do that, the more powerful it becomes, the more inspiring it becomes, and it changes the entire way that you start making better choices that move you towards your goals. So I hope you go check that out. Uh, if you have any questions, feel free to ask them. I hope you're all having a nice, uh, Friday. Here is the end of the week. This week's flying by. No, I can't believe it's already almost the end of September. Oh my goodness, it's like we're in a time speeder-upper machine. But, uh, anyways, I hope you're all having a nice, a nice week, ready to have a nice weekend. If you have any weight loss questions, feel free to ask them. Um, I usually get on here Monday through Friday and around noon Eastern to help you all out. April says this is so helpful. Thank you. Yeah, you're welcome, April. Yeah, you know, I mean, my goal—I'm out here every Monday through Friday. This is a mission for me, so I do this to help you know as many people as possible live at their goal weight. And I think understanding that there's a better way to approach your weight beyond dieting is the first step in making that happen. That the real goal is not to lose weight, but to live at your goal weight, and. They're fundamentally different goals, and they're fundamentally different processes to achieve them. Obviously, right? Because dieting the way most dieters think, you know what I'm starting to notice is a lot of GLP-1ers think the same way. I'll talk about this in a minute. But a lot of dieters tend to think about weight loss really as a temporary thing. Now they won't. You may not realize that, but the way you think about dieting subconsciously is coded as a temporary thing. That I'm going to diet until I lose the weight. Um, and so it's set up— again, most dieting is built on the one phase of living at your goal weight, which is the first one, which is losing the weight. But losing the weight is really just the first phase. I mean, you don't just wanna lose weight, you wanna live at your goal weight. You wanna lose weight first so you can get to your goal weight, but then the goal becomes, I wanna live here for the rest of my life. And unfortunately, most dieters are only thinking about losing the weight. Uh-huh. And this is what causes a lot of successful dieters. This is what I'm obsessed with, is there is a well-studied statistics. They've done plenty of studies, and consistently, dieters that are successful, the dieters that get to their goal weight, 85 to 95% of them put the weight back on. So dieting does not guarantee you stay at your goal weight. You already know that. I know, but I want to say it explicitly because. A lot of dieters will step into their weight loss phase, and they just are obsessed with it. And they say, "I'm just gonna lose this weight." I'll say, "What are you gonna do afterwards?" I'll figure that out then. But they never figure it out. And eventually, what happens is the weight loss phase loses a lot of its shine because if you've lost weight and put it back on a number of times, it gets to a point where even when you start a plan and start losing weight. You don't feel good because now you have enough times in the past where you've lost weight and put it back on that even when you start losing weight and even when you start being successful, you start getting anxious. This is what happens. I don't know if it's been a little while since you've lost some weight. You may not remember this or you may not have realized it, but I am telling you day in and day out here on the podcast. I've been doing this for over 21 years professionally. What happens when dieters start to lose weight and approach their goal weight? is they get more and more anxious that they're going to put the weight back on. So most dieters go from the mantra of, I just want to lose the weight, I just want to lose the weight, I just want to lose the weight, to, oh shit, I hope I don't put the weight back on, I hope I don't put the weight back on, I hope I don't put the weight back on. So that is not a good strategy mindset-wise to live at your goal weight. And again, it all starts, uh, because most people are focusing only on losing weight And focusing only on losing weight is a very short-term goal. You know, it's just one phase of the whole process. And again, the ultimate process is to live there. You know, what's up, Sanjita? Sanjita says, "Hey, this is Sanjita 2.0. Just wanted your advice on one thing. My workouts are quite directly related with my food choices during the day. The days I don't work out, I feel lazy to stick to my food habits. Please help me." Um, how to change my mindset about this correlation. Um, yeah, okay, fair enough. And I think, um, hold on a sec, let me get rid of this. Boop. Get rid of that little screen face where there's a ticker across. It's so funny. Anyways, uh, yeah, okay, so this is completely normal. That's the first thing I want you to understand. Uh, I just had this conversation this week in a coaching call that we had. Um, your behavior is extremely literal. It's very specific. It's very contextually dependent. So I'll give you the same example for me is on my workdays. Okay. And I work from home. I have my own spot here, so I don't work with anyone else, but I work out at work. So when I walk into my office, I am doing push-ups and bodyweight squats Monday through Friday within the first hour of being in here. That's how it goes on the days where I'm not working. Well, on the weekends I don't do any push-ups or squats. So, and even if I wanted to, I just forget. So it's important to understand that a lot of our behavior is just very Pavlovian. We just kind of link it together. And so what I would suggest to you, Sanjita, is not that you need to work out necessarily every day. I don't think you do. But what I may do, because working out and eating well is linked together, I would probably work to install a workout On all the days, but a simple workout. So you have your regular workouts you stick with now and continue those the same. It's all working for you. But I think one of the easiest ways to get your eating more under control on the other days is to actually implement something that you would define as working out, but that's just way easier. So it could literally be five jumping jacks. It could be six wall push-ups. It could be You know, doing some bodyweight squats 3 times. It literally doesn't matter. It's just something. And if it's something that you can define as working out, you've already created the association that on days I work out, I tend to make better food choices. That's a subconscious program that you now have. And so now the goal is how can we make that happen every day without having to work out the same amount of time, the same amount of intensity every day? And what I would suggest is probably the easiest first step Is again adding an everyday workout, minimal one, but but an everyday workout, and that might trigger your mind into go into that mode, and it might clean up a lot of eating automatically. And if it doesn't, you know, we just go to work and test some different things out. But hopefully that'll help you out because a lot of times what people try and do is they say, "I'm gonna eat good every day." Well, yeah, but but days you work out, you naturally eat well. Days you don't work out, you naturally eat poorly. So the easiest solution on paper here is that we work out every day, but without having to work out intensely every day, if that makes sense. That's the easiest solution. And if that doesn't work, like I said, you, you know, on top of that, you have good eating habits on the days you're working out. So that's great. So you know what good eating looks like, feels like, is like. And now the goal is to apply that to days when you don't work out. But again, I would do the first one first. But, but you have your option, whichever one you want to do. But at the end of the day, ultimately, folks, our behavior is running on autopilot. This is why dieting doesn't work long term, because it never changes your subconscious programming. You are programmed to eat the way you do. You're programmed to be at the weight you're at. This is why your weight pretty much hovers around a certain point. Your weight's not constantly going up. No, it's not. It may be going up a little bit over year over year, but it basically stays at a kind of— it's like, it's like a thermostat. It stays at a certain kind of range. And this is because you've been subconsciously programmed to weigh that. And the way you've— you're subconsciously programmed to weigh that, and you do that by subconsciously being programmed to behave the way you do to live at that weight. So when you eat, how much you eat, how fast you eat, what you choose, um, all of these things are skills and behaviors you've learned and automated, and now you do them automatically. And what you do when you go on a diet is you try and fight against these skills. You try and fight against these behaviors, these learnings. It would be like trying to fight against yourself to get on a bike and not know how to ride it. You couldn't, you know what I mean? Like, once you know how to do something, it runs automatically. It would be like me, you know, holding up this book here. Let me just flip this around so you can see it without it being mirrored. But it would be like me holding this book up and you not reading it. Don't understand what those words say. You can't, right? Because you've learned how to read something you did not know how to do. You learned how to do it, and now it went into deeper brain structures where it just runs automatically. So that if I hold this book up, you can't help but understand what it says. You can't even stop yourself. If you understand English, you look at this and you understand. So what the hell is the Dow? Okay, fair enough. But living at your goal weight, you can't not understand that. You understand it before you can stop yourself from understanding. Does that make sense? This is what dieting's like. You're always playing a step behind. So it's like, you know what I mean? You're already craving the food before you try and stop it. You're already eating too much before you start. You're already eating quickly before you can stop it. This is why dieting doesn't work. It's, it's not set up to work with the brain you got in your head. Your brain— you are designed to work on autopilot primarily. Think about your life. Think about all the things you've learned how to do. And now you just do them automatically. Reading, writing, riding a bike, driving a car, using a computer mouse, using your phone, taking a shower, brushing your teeth, washing the dishes, cooking your favorite meals. You do this stuff, it's a routine. It's literally a part of your brain called procedural memory. And you don't have to think about how to do it anymore, you just do it. Well, guess what? Your eating is the same way. Your lifestyle habits, or lack thereof, are the same thing. And what dieting is, is fighting against that. And so it's always gonna be a fight as long as you do it. Program yourself, then we're looking to develop new skills, new habits, new routines, new behaviors that run automatically so that we automatically and naturally live the lifestyle and make the food choices that get and then keep us at our goal weight. But the difference between that and dieting is that on the horizon, there's not only us at our goal weight, but there's us at our goal weight in a way that feels relatively easy. Programming yourself then is not just about getting to your goal weight, it's about getting to your goal weight in the easiest, most enjoyable, comfortable way possible. That's how you live at your goal weight. There's a huge difference between getting to your goal weight and living there. They're 2 completely different things. And until you really understand that, you're going to keep following and, you know, following for the diet's bullshit, because the diets exist because they promise you the world. And you know, listen, maybe you can accomplish those goals for a little while. I wouldn't argue that at your most motivated, fine. You lost a lot of weight. You got to your goal weight. But the same problem has always shown up for you that you can't keep it up. You can't maintain it. And you think it's your fault. You think it's something wrong with you. You think you don't have enough willpower when the reality is you don't have enough programming. You don't have enough skills. You don't have the skills to live at your goal weight if you're not at your goal weight. It's that simple. And the specific skills I'm talking about, in a general sense, this is the goal weight pyramid we follow: mindset, lifestyle, and eating. In a simplistic way, if you're overweight, it's because you don't know how to think, live, or eat like a thin, healthy, happy person. Do you not believe that? Do you think you do? Do you think you know how to think like a— do you think you know how to think, live, and eat like a thin, healthy, happy person in a way that works for you? Do you think that right now, sitting here, that you right now in your body at your weight, you're at right now? Do you truly believe that you've got the skills and the ability to think, live, and eat like a thin, healthy, happy person? You know you don't, and that's okay. But this is why you're struggling with your weight, not because you don't have enough willpower, because you don't have enough skills. You don't have the skills to do these things on autopilot. And until you figure that out, weight is always going to feel like a struggle. I don't know how programming happens. Programming happens for a number of reasons. Nature nurtures both. And if you're overweight, you have been programmed to be overweight because it takes no effort for you to be overweight. If you stop thinking about food and just live your life, you're just overweight. That's how you know you've got an overweight mindset. The way you think about food, the way you think about your weight, the way you think about your health, your lifestyle. All of these things makes you overweight. That's the starting point. We know this. So the answer is not just to fight against that mindset. It's to create a new mindset, to create new programming that gives you the results you want. Because the real secret in this is that you're able to live overweight completely automatically. So much so that even when you try and change it, you can't. That's how powerful your subconscious programming is. Once you're programmed, It just runs automatically. Again, you can ride a bike for the rest of your life. You never have to learn it again because you've got that programming in you. Maybe you have the programming to eat fast. Okay. But you can't just go about the future thinking that the answer is that I just need to fight against my fast eating. The answer is to program in to eat more slowly so that it becomes an automatic behavior for you. So you don't have to think about it. That's the secret. Uh, what's up, Kimberly? Kimberly's back again. All right, nice. Welcome back. Yes, and for all these on Facebook, if you, uh, type mind, M-I-N-D, into the comments, uh, you get a free hypnosis session. Uh, if you're on TikTok, you can just click the link in my bio. And if you are somewhere else listening to this, you can just go to programyourselfthin.com and I give you a free hypnosis session. And, uh, yeah, amongst other things, I also give you a free training called Reprogrammed: How to Live at Your Goal Weight Without the Fight. But yeah, if you have any weight loss questions, feel free to ask them. Um, whatever you've been struggling with, think about GLP-1, we can talk about that. Um, pretty much anything you're dealing with, with eating, weight-related, uh, type of thing, share it. Let's talk about it. Maybe I can give you some insight as to how to approach it differently. That might get you better results. I will tell you the classic example of what I get from people initially when they first— when we first have conversations is that I find most dieters describe their challenges and their situation in vague terms that aren't specific enough. So a lot of times when someone has some sort of question, it's usually a vague question like, how do I eat better? How do I stop binging? How do I burn more calories? I don't know, some huge, big, vague question. And, um, so as a rule, what I find to be almost always valuable is to ask more specific questions. And I think this is important because I think, you know, as a dieter, you've been trained to think in very big, vague ways, in a sense. Now, what do I mean? Let's take keto, for example. It's not vague; it's it's specific in the sense that okay, you're not gonna have any carbs. Okay, but the vagary is well, what are you gonna eat then? What exactly? How are you gonna eat? What's a diet of no carbs look like? Now, if this is the first time doing keto, you're gonna realize you have no programming for what a diet of a carb-free diet looks like, how it works. Uh, what you're gonna eat, what the plan is, how to prepare it. So there's a huge cognitive load when you first start a keto plan if you've never done it before. Because on one side of the coin, we have, okay, I'm gonna stop eating carbs. Well, that's very easy to understand. Conceptually, that's as simple as it gets, and this is how diets are sold. Diets are always sold to you by focusing on one big thing. You're gonna stop eating carbs, you're gonna stop eating for 16 hours, you're gonna count your points, you're gonna restrict your calories. It's always based on one thing. But the reality of actually living it is a much more complex thing because the flip side of not eating carbs is creating an entirely new way of eating that is carb-free. And that takes a tremendous amount of cognitive load, which, by the way, cognitive load is directly impacting your willpower. So I can drain your willpower, folks. I could give you math problems for a half hour and you will have less willpower at the end of it. So willpower is not this infinite resource within you. It is like a muscle, and you only get a limited amount of willpower every day. And most dieters are set up to fail because you're using so much mental energy to do your diet that you burn through your willpower. And this is why most dieters experience, uh, doing the plan for a little while and then fading off of it. That's the that's the general shape of a diet, and so that's that's the issue. You know what I mean? But it's got an answer, so so I don't want to I don't want to leave you hanging. I mean, I think the answer is that you stop just focusing on the first phase of weight loss. You know, I always metaphorically I always say dieting is like a sprint. Living at your goal weight is like a marathon, and if you go into a marathon race. with the mindset of a sprinter, they're gonna start the race and you're gonna run as fast as you can, and you're gonna be way ahead for the first whatever, 8th of a mile, half a mile, or however, however long you can run for. And you're gonna think you're winning, you're gonna be way ahead everyone. But then every single time, you're going to collapse somewhere in the relative beginning of the marathon, and everyone's going to pass you by, and you're going to lose every single time with that strategy. So strategy matters, and what most you've been doing—you've been using a dieting strategy for a long-term goal. So you've been using a sprinting strategy for a marathon race, and it's destined for failure. And this is what most you have been taught to do with your weight. And once you see it, I think it becomes pretty clear that you had virtually no chance of success, and it had nothing to do with your willpower, your focus, your motivation, your personality. And had everything to do with the fact that you've never learned a realistic system for living at your goal weight. Not even once. Not even once have you learned a real system for living at your goal weight. You've learned lots of ways to lose weight quickly. I wouldn't argue that. But I bet in your entire life, and you've been focused on weight for a lot of your life, a lot of energy, and you have never once seen a system laid out for how to live at your goal weight. And that's what makes Program Yourself Thin so unique, is that it's a system designed and built around people that successfully lost weight and kept it off for at least 2 years. So Program Yourself Thin is all about living at your goal weight, designed by studying people who have lived at their goal weight after having been overweight. Makes a lot of sense, doesn't it? I mean, when it's put out, does it make sense? Does it not? Am I just talking bullshit? No, I just, just Keto's the way. I don't know. So anyways, I like to get back on here every day and talk about that. What's up, Pamela? How's it going? Good morning to you. What's up, Digital? Digital says hello, all you beautiful people journeying to great health. Yes, I appreciate all of you, and I appreciate y'all showing up. But yeah, any questions you got, feel free to ask them. If you, um, if you've been struggling with weight, what do you think your biggest struggle is? Oh, the ice cream. No, it's not the ice cream, it's the behavior. But But again, how do you think about it? That's the interesting thing, I think, because you know the beauty of approaching your weight with a mindset focused is you actually get new information, new questions, new insights. And most of the time with dieting, it's just doing the same stuff over and over. Beyoncé made me budget, says I think my biggest struggle is staying consistent. Yeah, of course, of course that's your. But here's the thing, and building a system that fits me individually. All right, I like that. But listen, everyone here's biggest struggle is staying consistent. But you think what keeps you consistent is your willpower. You wake up and you make yourself do the right thing. You want to do the wrong thing, you make yourself do the right thing. That's how you're defining staying consistent, and that is set up to fail. You're not thinking— see, because I can even hear it in the language. See, staying consistent is me using my willpower to get myself to do the right thing, as opposed to looking at it— consistency as developing skills and routines and habits that run automatically. It's 2 different ways to look at it, because one, we're using the willpower to force us to do something always and forever in the moment. The other one is we're using willpower to install habits. Think about your toothbrushing habit. You're str— you don't struggle with consistency with your toothbrushing habit because it just runs on autopilot. You get ready to go to bed, next thing you're brushing your teeth, you didn't realize it. You wake up in the morning, next thing you're brushing your teeth, you hardly even remembered. How'd you do that? And you do this all day long in different ways. You do automatic things, or you don't do things, you know what I mean? But regardless, it's the same thing. So when we think staying consistent comes down to me being really focused and motivated and being 100%, choosing the right thing, Well, then it requires that you're always in like a peak state, and you're not going to be. So programming yourself then is built to withstand what happens when life goes wild. What happens when work sucks? We got to move. We get separate. We get divorced. We have financial stresses. Our bosses—we lose our jobs. How do you stay on track? And it's through having automated habits, routines, and behaviors. You got them already. That's why your weight is what it is. It's just intentionally, purposefully, intentionally programming them so they bring us in a different direction. So consistency, I think, is absolutely the right focus. But how in the world are you ever going to be consistent with a diet? Because it requires constant vigilance, constant willpower, constant focus, and it's impossible as a human being to stay constantly focused on something. The things you do long term are things that are built Your work. You go to work all the time, not because you got willpower to get up. You got get up for work because you've got a mindset that supports getting up at work, and you do it pretty much automatically. And part of that mindset is when you go to bed, you have a full system for how to get up and go to work or go to school or take care of your kid. You've got programmed in behaviors, mindset. Let me break it down, right? If you're a parent, you've got a mindset, lifestyle, not eating, but behavior. Um, of how to take care of your kid, and you do it pretty much on autopilot. You're not negotiating with yourself every time you got to do something for your kid or your partner or your boss. You're in a routine with it. And it's the same thing with your reading. Problem is that you're in the routine with being overweight. So instead of thinking you have to fight against that forever, think about transforming it, changing it— new routines that run automatically. And I think that focus sets you up for a lot more success because now it starts to look Now weight loss starts to look a lot more like taking up a new sport or a musical instrument or art or dancing or any other thing that you would take on. Because what would happen? You would start to practice skills. You want to learn how to play golf? You break it down. I'm going to work on my drive. I'm going to work on my mid-game. I'm going to work on putting. You break down the hole into little pieces and you start working on those skills so that you can do them naturally, easily, automatically. And as you do that, you start to sit atop all of your skill sets, and that is how you become a better golfer. It's not by reading a bunch of golf books and watching a bunch of golf trainings and then walking onto the course and saying, okay, I know everything, and now I'm doing everything right. Boop. That's not what happens. The things you do best in life are the things that you don't think about. Dieting, you're thinking about 24 hours a day. You have to. That's how it's built. It's built for you to psychologically micromanage yourself. Neuroscientifically, you're using your prefrontal cortex, which is the newest part of your brain and the most energy-intensive part of your brain, to manage the rest of your brain that runs on autopilot. So again, it's the, it's the experience of looking at these words and trying not to understand them. You can't. The second those letters hit your brain, you understand what those words mean. It happened before you could stop it. So this is why in Program Yourself, then we focus on the subconscious mind. It's the, it's the most powerful part of your brain. Think about all the things you've learned in your life that you can just do naturally and automatically now. It's amazingly powerful. And that's what you're either going to fight against to manage your weight, or you're going to program to manage your weight. And they come out with 2 totally different Um, things. Yeah, Miss Moss says, I think my biggest struggle is believing it's possible. And I would agree, because it's not possible. It's not possible dieting to, to maintain your weight, not statistically. When you have an 85 to 95% failure rate, yeah, it's not a struggle that you can't believe it. It's evidence of fact. If you've tried losing weight with a diet 10, 20, 30, 100 times in your life and it's failed Your biggest struggle isn't believing it. That would be living in fantasy land. Your biggest struggle is that you keep trying to diet to lose weight instead of doing something different. That's why you don't believe it. You never will, because, Miss Moss, you have so much experience now, and it ain't going to be any different the next time you do. Do you think the next time you do keto it's going to be better somehow? Do you think it's somehow going to end differently the next time you do keto or Weight Watchers or Jenny Craig or whatever bullshit? Do you think it's gonna be different next time than it was the last? 5, 10, 20, 100 times you did it? No. So, Miss Moss, that's not your biggest struggle. Your biggest struggle is that you don't have a better plan than dieting. And if dieting is your only plan, you don't believe in it, folks. All of you don't believe in it. That's why you're apathetic. This is why you can't get yourself to start another diet, because you don't believe in it either. And you shouldn't believe in it. It doesn't work. If I sit here and tell you I found out a way to actually fly, you just got to run really fast and flap your arms really hard. How hard are you going to try? What if I swear it works? How hard you gonna try? You're not, because you don't believe it, and you'd be right not to believe it. And you're right not to believe that the diets are gonna work because they're not going to work. They don't work to help you achieve what you want. That's what you have to give clarity to. Yes, they can help you lose weight for a little while, but they don't help you live at your goal weight. You know this 100%, and so it's not a problem when you don't believe the diet's gonna work for you. That's not some sort of shortcoming in you. That's your brain working perfectly. Dieting doesn't fucking work. It doesn't work for anyone, folks. We've had 100 years of all the diets. There's not one single diet that rises to the top to help people manage their weight long-term. Not a single one. Maybe Weight Watchers, maybe because it's got the social component. That's about as close as you're gonna get. No strategy has effectively helped the majority of people lose weight long-term. There's not one diet. Tell me one diet that is. I've, I've been doing this on the podcast for almost 4 years now. I've never had someone tell me, I've never had someone say, no, no, this, this works. I mean, listen, any diet can work. There's always outliers, you know what I mean? So, so I'll give you that. I'm talking statistically. There's no plan out there. So programming yourself thin is, is a new take on what seems like an old problem, but it's really not. Because again, it's not about losing weight, it's about living at your goal weight. You've got to make that shift. You've got to make that change in your mind. That's why I literally wrote the book on living at your goal weight. At this point, you're, you're in your 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s. You've lost and gained weight so many times that you don't believe that it's going to matter even if you lose weight. So you can't get yourself to start. You feel apathetic. You feel like nothing's going to work. But the worst part is you blame yourself instead of blaming the strategy you keep trying. You're running east looking for a sunset when you try and lose weight long-term with a diet. There's no diet built for the long-term. And even like, like a Mediterranean diet, in essence, it's built for the long-term. I mean, like, I don't— no one would argue that a Mediterranean diet is a healthy diet, but me giving you a meal plan of all Mediterranean diet foods versus you actually being able to do it are 2 totally different things. So even if you know what you should do, being able to get yourself to do it consistently, they're 2 totally different things. And you're never learning how to get yourself to do it. You've never once— all the diets you've done, all the weight loss approaches— you've never learned how to get yourself to do it. You've never learned how to make living at your goal weight easy, comfortable, enjoyable. You've never even thought that. You've never attempted it. And it's never happened. But what happens if you do? I sit here in front of you as someone who's lost 50 pounds 30 years ago. I'm as motivated now about my mindset, lifestyle, and eating as I was when I was actively losing weight. And that's when you know you're on the right path. I, I love living this way. So living at my goal weight is the easiest, most comfortable, enjoyable thing for me now. I do most of it on autopilot. I still manage it. I still, you know, it's still something I have to watch out. Um, and track things, but it gets easier and easier and easier and easier and easier every time I do it. It keeps evolving and improving. Yeah, yeah, Beyoncé made me budget. Great, thank you. You're welcome. Uh, yeah, Miss Moss says, I mean, weight loss in general, not dieting. Yeah, but Miss Moss, you can't separate them. If you're just— if you're a typical weight loss person in America, you are a dieter. What else? What? How else would you think about losing weight if it's not a diet? There's literally no other paradigm. I've been on the search for it, and I'm not. I'm obviously excluding GLP-1s and surgery, but how you would naturally go about changing your weight. What other way other than dieting would you ever even? And don't say all lifestyle change or mindset shift. Those are too vague. I'm talking about a specific laid out plan for how to change your weight so that you live at a lower weight for the rest of your life. How else would you think about it other than dieting? I know there's no other paradigm because I've literally spent 30 years obsessed with this. There's dieting, and dieting infects everything because dieting is a mindset. Dieting is a mindset. You want to know how a vegan diet and a carnivore diet are the exact same thing and everything in between, every diet in between? Because every single diet, whether you're a vegan or whether you're a carnivore, you're going to start tomorrow on Monday 100%. That's the diet mindset that guarantees failure. You're gonna start that diet and that plan 100% starting— you're gonna change everything starting tomorrow on Monday, and you're gonna ride out that perfect change as long as you can. And as soon as you make a mistake, it's most likely gonna stop you in your tracks. That's the dieting mindset. And this is why you don't believe you can lose weight, because you can't be perfect. So dieting has conditioned you all to think that my weight loss success is dependent on me being perfect. And you know you can't be perfect, and there's no space in a diet for not being perfect and still succeeding because everything about a diet is short-term based. And so if you make a mistake, now it feels like it's going to take longer to get the results, and now you lose your motivation. So it is dieting anyways, unfortunately. Uh, yeah. All right. I speak the truth. Thank you. I think I do. Jerry said, I just ate a Big Mac and fries, and when I see you, uh, and I said I messed up. Um, yeah, but Jerry, okay, here's the thing. You didn't mess up. Please understand, you didn't mess up. We got to get ourselves off the level of good, bad person, okay? You didn't mess up. You did something. And if you stop judging it, instead connect to the consequences, it's a lot more powerful. So I'd much— and you know what happens, by the way? We eat the McDonald's or whatever, and then we say, "Oh, I screwed up. You bad person! I shouldn't have done that." And the second we start to beat ourselves up about it or feel bad about it, we disassociate from our body. The more we start thinking up here, we're not paying attention to what's going on down here. And the most powerful thing you can do when you go and get the fast food or you get the the bullshit or whatever it is, don't beat yourself up. Just sit. Cleanly with the consequence. So I want you to sit quietly. If you could take 10 seconds, 30 seconds, a minute, sit quietly in your body after you go and eat a McDonald's value meal and just sit there and notice how it feels in your body. Notice what you're saying and thinking in your mind about that behavior and decision. Notice what emotions you feel. What emotions do you feel from that decision you just made? How does it feel in your body? Do you notice any energetic shifts, any physical effects? And again, that's the least of it. The most important piece is what does it do to your mindset and your thinking? What do you say to yourself after you get McDonald's or whatever it may be for you? What do you feel emotionally? What emotions do you feel? That's gonna be a much more valuable use of your time right now, Jerry, than saying, oh, I screwed up, I shouldn't have done that. Okay, don't do that. It does it— it does absolutely nothing, folks. If that worked for us, no one would have a weight issue. Because what most dieters do— and again, this is all based in dieting, because dieting is all about doing the right thing, the good thing, or doing the bad thing. And you're— it's like a test, right? And if you do the bad thing, you're a bad person who, you know, needs to be shamed. It just doesn't work, and it's unpleasant on top of it. So again, what I would suggest, Jerry, is that you connect into your body and notice the natural consequences that follow when you go and get a Big Mac and fries. Feel it in your body. Notice what it does to your mindset, what you say to yourself. Notice what emotions it unleashes in you. Do you feel happy, confident, excited? Are you saying, "Nice job! Good! This is how you succeed. This is why you're killing it. This is awesome." Or are you saying the opposite? And that's all you need to do, because as you start to clarify what the consequence that always follows is, you start to avoid it. Um, Charlene says it's really about changing your habits and replacing them with different habits. Yes, absolutely. But, um, learning how to replace your habits with other habits is a whole thing, you know. That's why in Program Yourself Thin, when it comes to mindset, we break it down into other subcategories, but one of them is habits. Super important. But when we talk about habits, we can know habits are important. I know you all know habits are important, but how have you tried to manage your habits? You've tried to stop your habits. You try and fight your bad habits. You don't know how to install good habits. You don't know how to replace old habits with new ones. You don't know the, the science of habits. You know there's a science of habits. You know about the habit loop? Do you understand like what a habit actually is? I know it sounds like, like it's one of those things we kind of have a gist, general idea what it means, but not a real specific literal knowledge of it. Well, understanding how habits work literally is crucial if you want to change your habits. And once you know how to influence your habits successfully, yeah, you're damn right, it's a huge, huge, uh, benefit to managing your weight. Huge. Agreed. Dude, Aloncourt says, I'm going to make myself a sign that says head west for sunset with a hidden meaning. I love it. Nice, I'm glad. Elizabeth said, good morning, God bless you, please pray for me. I can promise you have a blessed day. All right, I read that first. Beyoncé Made Me Budget says, so far it's been lifestyle changes that I can keep up long term, like walking and eating smaller portions of food. Yeah, great. And that, that's usually how it is. Um, and again, that's back to this, this pyramid here. Part of the idea of this pyramid is that we have lots of things we can work on. The problem with dieting is that there's one thing to work on, whatever your diet tells you, right? You're either fixated on carbs, or you're fixated on not eating for 16 hours, or you're fixated on calories and whatever. You're fixated on counting points. You're fixated on one thing, and it's normal and natural to get tired of one thing. So that's just another piece of it. So in Program Yourself Thin, we have a whole bunch of things you can work on, and none of them are that hard. And a lot of times I always say this is why the mindset's on the bottom, then lifestyle and eating, because when you work on the mindset and the lifestyle pieces— listen, sometimes I'm really on track with my eating and sometimes I'm not. But even when I'm not really on track with my eating, I'll be on track with my lifestyle, my mindset. So I'm still grounded in my approach, I'm still grounded in the work, whereas a dieter is all or nothing, all or nothing. And program yourself then where all or something I'm always in the game. Yeah, sometimes my eating is just top-notch. I'm just—I'm killing. I'm really clean all the rest of it. Sometimes not so much, but I still got my mindset and lifestyle stuff, and you know some of my eating things as well underneath that supporting me. That's the big difference because it's not what you do when you're on the diet; it's what you do when you're not on the diet. That—that's what's determining your weight. So, all right. Cat says sometimes I get anxiety after I know I've overeaten. Yeah, exactly. That's what I mean. So it's not about beating yourself up. It's not even about beating yourself up for overeating. It's about saying— it's about redefining. Because, you know, we always make a choice. What every food choice we make, you can think of this subconsciously, we have a scale. We're weighing the pleasure, pain, benefits, cost-benefit of it, right? And, um, you see a pint of ice cream, your favorite ice cream, in front of you. You're like, oh, that, that's pleasurable. then you think about not eating, you say, oh, it's painful. So that's a motivation system that's going to drive you to eat it, right? But if you start to think, oh yeah, that— because what would happen? I'm just— just magical experience, but let's say every time you ate your favorite ice cream, I popped out after you were done and I whacked your thumb with a hammer. Let's just imagine that. Let's just say— just imagine that reality. All of a sudden I got magical abilities And I pop out and I whack your thumb with a hammer. So you're still, you're still a bad person for eating ice cream. You shouldn't have done that. But I'm now whacking your thumb. Oh shit. And you say, oh my God. And then you do it again. I whack your thumb. Ow, fuck. 3 times, 4 times, 5 times. Eventually you say, oh shit, you know, every time I eat ice cream, I get my thumb whacked with a hammer. As soon as you start to associate those 2 things together, what are you gonna do next time you think about eating ice cream? That's how you make decisions. It has nothing to do whether you're a good person or bad person. I should eat this. I shouldn't eat it. It has to do with the emotional association that you have to it, and there's a very powerful negative consequence that's always right there, but you're missing it because you're beating yourself up. Yeah. So what if you get anxiety after you've overeating? So okay. So now once you start to realize that the anxiety is the me hitting your thumb. So now it's like you're like, oh man, I got— I'm thinking about— I'm making this more conscious than it is, but you're like, oh, I'm gonna overeat, or I'm gonna choose that, that thing I said I wasn't gonna eat. Now usually you say, oh, it's so good, it's so good, because what you're doing is your motivation system says, oh man, that food's so good, and if I don't get it, it's pain. So this is the worst propulsion system you can have because you've got all the pleasure attached to eating the food and all the pain attached to not eating it. That's how you blast yourself to eating the food you swore you weren't going to eat. But what if you sat in front of that food calmly and you said, yes, it tastes really good, I enjoy the taste a lot, but as soon as I'm done eating, 5 seconds after I take the last bite, which is going to be about 15 minutes from now, I'm going to feel a bunch of anxiety. I'm going to feel anxious, I'm going to feel depressed, I'm going to be— I'm going to be so upset with myself. I'm gonna say that's why you always get shitty results. This is why you can't stick with anything, because you keep making these choices. I'm not beating myself up about this. I'm just telling myself what's awaiting me down this path. Does that make sense? Because that's a different approach. That's a much different thing, and it works a lot better. Uh, yeah, there we go. What's up, Jennifer? Yes, Jennifer says no one can be consistently perfect. And I remember Jennifer was just here yesterday. She's in the program, but 22 months at her goal weight. Okay, you might want to listen to her. You might want to listen to her. Yeah, I agree. It's impossible to be consistently perfect. You can't be. And dieting is kind of setting that up for you, you know, as the goal. Yeah, Cat says, uh, makes sense, kind of how I avoid alcohol. I know I'll feel bad the next day. Exactly. Exactly, and I'm glad you mentioned that because I had a real issue with alcohol. Even you know, not a surprise that the issue with alcohol was right around with the weight issue. But it wasn't. That was the first time I really started to realize how shitty I felt when I drank, and the more I started to realize how shitty I felt, the less desire I had to do it. See folks, your motivation for food is is a changeable thing. I'll give you another example of how it could change your emotions and craving for ice cream real fast. Okay, and pick whatever you want. Pick the food you struggle with the most. It doesn't— whatever. Ben Jerry's ice cream, pizza, cookies. Pick whatever food you just like you have no control over. Pick that food right now. You think you have no control over it? Why? Because you have no willpower? Is that what you think? Do you think you have no control over that food because you have no willpower? Because that is not it, and I'll prove it to you here. What if you think about that food and all of a sudden we're in a situation where you love to eat it and you can never say no, and all of a sudden I pop up with a briefcase with a million dollars in it and I said, if you don't eat that ice cream, I got a million dollars for you right now. I'll give it to you tomorrow morning if you don't eat it. I want you to just— it's a thought experiment. Just imagine for a second, literally The most tempting food in the world for you, the food you can never say no to. But now imagine I pop up in that scenario and say, I got a million dollars for you if you don't eat it. Would you eat it because you can't stop yourself, or would you gladly not eat it? You would gladly not eat it. Why? Because now all of a sudden your pleasure would not be focused on the food. Your pleasure would be focused on how you're going to spend the million bucks. So again, this reveals that it's your mindset that's in control of your cravings. Your mindset's way more empowering and powerful than your willpower is, you know. So, uh, what's up Kimberly? Kimberly says, okay, I'll ask. Grew up with great cooks that never missed a meal. I'm trying intermittent fasting because I never liked eating early anyway but was forced to. Did this to my kids too. Question, does intermittent fasting help older women, 67, or is it just another way of doing it? Thanks. Your words make sense and are helping. Um, you know, listen, the golden rule of programming yourself then is there's no right or wrong, there's only what works for you. So if you do intermittent fasting and you absolutely love it, then go for it. That's a great plan for you, okay? But if you do intermittent fasting and it's okay till about 9 or 10, and then you start getting stressed and anxious and thinking about food and you start getting hungrier, then I say it's not good. I believe for the people that intermittent fasting is not just some magical fix for right away, that most of you are stressing yourselves out unnecessarily. And I think when you're 67, a 67-year-old woman, I think you got to be careful because I think your stress response is a huge factor in your weight maintenance. And I think stressing yourself out is going to work against your weight loss in a bunch of ways. So if you are relaxed and calm intermittent fasting, then great. If it's stressing you out and you're getting really hungry and then overeating and it's not working well and you don't like it, then I would say no. You know, it's just another way to do things. And more often than not— now again, I get to see the people that it didn't work for, so I have a biased view— but more often than not, I think intermittent fasting is helping you become a binge eater more than it's helping you lose weight. I, I certainly have seen binge or intermittent fasting lead more to overeating and binge eating than I have seen it lead to managing your weight long term. But again, it's up to you. I mean, it depends how it works for you, but there's nothing magical about intermittent fasting. Um, you know, and, and to your point, uh, I like eating early in the morning, you know. So I stop eating at night, usually around 6, 7 o'clock, and I'll eat the next day 7 or 8 o'clock. So I have about 12, 13 hours, but I chose that based on how I felt. I feel better when I eat earlier. I like it. When I tried going till noon, it was stressful for me. I didn't like it. That's how my body and shit just— I'm wired that way. So I worked with what worked for me. So I think if you follow that guidance, Kimberly, I don't think you can go wrong, right? You just figure out what for you is the most comfortable and natural. But the problem with intermittent fasting amongst all the diets is it's so rigid. And it's rigid because they have to sell you a philosophy to everyone. So everyone's got to do 16 hours of not eating. Well, what if it's uncomfortable for you? You know, to be flexible with it, to make it your own, is discouraged. So I think that that's one of the biggest problems with diets. I, I think you can learn a lot from all the diets. I think a lot of them have, you know, really good things to teach. I think the problem is when they say this is the entire plan and don't change a thing, because then now you're giving up your humanness. You're a human being. You can't be just Someone can't just tell you how to eat for the rest of your life, you know. They say like, what are you gonna— someone's gonna tell you what kind of movies to watch and what kind of music to listen to, what kind of clothes to wear? Like, you're a human being who's got opinions and preferences, and you know, you got to honor that. And so you got to figure out what works for you based on you. You can test different things and see how they work, but my primary factor, my primary criteria of what's working or not that I would be looking at, especially if I was a 67-year-old woman Is is it relaxing? That would be the biggest thing if, and I've spent over 21 years professionally working with women to help them manage their weight. So I didn't just pop out here. I'm not just saying you know I'm not just saying this stuff. I believe that managing stress management on one side, being able to be more calm described on the other side, I think is fundamental to managing your weight. And so from that place, you try different things and see if they stress you out or if they calm you down and ground you. And then follow the path of being calm, you know, grounded and calm is what I would suggest. Yeah, Pamela says, yep, having a routine is important when life goes sideways. You can keep going with the routine in place. Yeah, exactly. That's exactly right. And you know, sometimes my habits, um, are malleable too, folks, you know. So I have a meditation habit. I have literally meditated every day for like the last 3 or 4 years, but I meditated different amounts of time. So like, if like I don't know, I'm on vacation or my schedule's a little weird or things are whatever, um, I might meditate for a few minutes. And then if everything's normal, I might— I'll meditate my normal time, you know. So there's a big range there, so I can be flexible with it, but I always maintain the habit container, the routine, to some degree. Um, but again, it goes up and down depending. I mean, and that's normal. That's being a human. You're not a robot who always performs at the exact same levels, always the same person, the same situation. Things are always in flux, and so you need to have the ability to be flexible and to, you know, adjust and adapt to changes that are going on. Uh, Kimberly says, from a family of great cooks that never missed a meal— oh, did this to my kids too. Yeah, yeah, gotcha. Um, yeah, and that part too. Um, great cooks, whatever. I mean, again, it doesn't matter. Uh, it, it matters, don't get me wrong, it does matter a little bit, but At the end of the day, it's ultimately your motivation, and motivation is created with your mindset. Motivation is not a willpower— I mean, it's not— motivation's a whole system. There's a science of motivation. Willpower is not enough to rely on because your willpower is related to your motivation anyways. Um, all right, Hillary. Hillary says, want to recommend Jim's Reprogrammed video. It's got some great visuals that will stick with you. Yes, yes. All right, I appreciate you saying that, Hillary. Yes, that reminds me too. Again, if you're not in my world, click the link in my bio. If you're on TikTok, write mind, M-I-N-D. If you are in, um, Facebook, and it will send you a link for the hypnosis session I give you, and then it'll bring you right to this training I did. It's called Reprogrammed. It's like 20 minutes. It's the entire system I'm talking about just laid out. It's free. It's completely free. But if you're, if you're even remotely serious about your weight, you really gotta watch this. I appreciate you saying that, Hillary. Kimberly says, oh, I also had surgery caused from bad eating. Lost, lost down 30 pounds but gained it all back because my mind still hasn't learned a new way. You're right, it's your mindset. Yeah, exactly. Um, you know, weight loss that we lose through diets or GLP-1 or, um, being sick, you know, that's all temporary illusory weight loss, you know. Um, because you haven't changed the programming, you know. Until you change the programming, um, the weight's not going to change, you know. Yeah, Ken says a million dollars or the rest of your life comfortably at your goal weight. Now that's a quandary. Yeah, exactly, I get it. But the good news is you don't have to make that decision, you know. But the good news is you can have the rest of your life comfortably at your goal weight, and I would take that over the million dollars anyways. I'd love a million bucks too, but, um, I'm much more keyed into the value of my, my weight, my health, my happiness. I'll take that all day long. So I know people say, oh well, yeah, you're not offering me a million dollars. Well, yeah, I got something better for you— living at your goal weight. It's fucking awesome. Yeah, yeah. Says, I always get upset when I goof. Yeah, I know, we all get upset with ourselves when we goof. It's just not helpful. I'm not telling you that, you know, just be nice to yourself. I'm not saying that. I'm saying beating yourself up is literally ineffective. It's a bad strategy. It makes it— it makes you less effective. It doesn't work. Beating yourself up is not how you get better at things. You know, if we put it in a different context, I think it's so obvious. Um, I don't know, just golf. You don't have to even know golf, you know, enough to know. Um, let's just say I'm learning golf and I got a golf teacher, and, um, I go and I take a swing and I screw it up, and the teacher looks at me and says, oh, you fucking jerk, what are you doing? I told you, I told you, I told you to hit it right and you didn't even hit it right. What's wrong with you? How much better am I going to get the next time? Versus the coach is like, oh, okay, hold on. That's obviously not how you want to hit it, right? So what was going on there? You know, it looked like your shoulders were a little off there. You know, maybe you adjust your shoulders, it relaxes your right arm a little bit more. Which one's going to help me improve more? So I know, I know this too, because I know everyone here. I know you're all overthinkers. We all are. I'm— we're all part of the same club. I know you're an overthinker if you're here listening to this. I know it. And I know as an overthinker, you're probably a perfectionist. And there are good parts of that, but there's also bad parts. And the bad part is that expecting yourself to be perfect all the time, and then when you're not, piling on top of yourself as some sort of punishment to get yourself to be better next time is a shitty strategy. It's just a shitty strategy. And it doesn't make you, um, you know, it doesn't make you a high achiever. It doesn't make you more honest or more realistic. It's just a shitty strategy when you beat yourself up. I mean, think about, folks, if beating yourself up helped you, you know. What's up, Lois? Lois says, making new habits has been the biggest change on my journey. Takes time, but so worth it. Yeah, it definitely takes time. But again, I mean, if you're gonna play golf, right— and I know I keep going golf, but pick whatever, right? You'll play piano and play guitar. I want to learn a language. I want to learn how to draw. I want to learn how to dance. I want to do martial arts. Anything you choose. I want to learn how to garden. I want to learn how to You know, whatever, carve, it doesn't matter. Anything you pick, it's like, yeah, it's gonna take some time. You can't just read a book on it and do it great. And so weight's no different. But if you approach your weight— see, the difference is though, like, if you take on— you guys, I'm gonna learn golf. Well, you kind of start here and you keep developing your skills and you end up over here. Not by, not by just forcing yourself to be good, but by systematically working on the skills and getting better. And if you approach your weight the same way, again, if you realize we take the whole process and break it down into components— how do I think like a thin, healthy, happy person? How do I live like a thin, healthy, happy person? How do I eat like a thin, healthy, happy person? How do I do that in a way that works for me? And I practice it. You get better at it. And not only is it a more effective strategy, but motivationally it's night and day between dieting, because even when you have a bad day, you're understanding why, and then you get better at it tomorrow. Whereas with dieting, it's like an endurance test. We're either doing it perfectly or I'm not gonna do it at all. What's the point? So Jennifer says, my favorite tool is asking myself, how will I feel when I'm finished? I use that one very often. Yes, exactly. That's one of the mantras we install in the program. How will I feel when I finish? Because when you start making food decisions based on how you're going to feel 5 seconds after you take the last bite, that doesn't have to be the only criteria, but it should be part of the criteria, shouldn't it? See, we've been trained in this culture to only consider the— there's 3 phases of eating. There's anticipation, consumption, and consequence. And in this culture, we have been obsessively fixated and programmed to focus on the first 2: anticipation and consumption. Every single food ad you'll ever see in your life and have seen, and you've seen tens of millions of them, is fixating you on getting the food, opening the package, and then eating the food. That's it. You never see the last bite. You never see the sitting with the empty plate. You never see the the full bloated, you know, description, you know, in front of you on the commercial. You're not going to see that. So it's an unbalanced way that we've been programmed to think about food. So it's not wrong or unfair or bullshit to think, well, what is the consequence that always follows these behaviors? Instead of saying, oh my God, I ate the whole pizza again, what's wrong with me? Instead of doing that, why don't you say, what happens when I eat a whole pizza? Oh, I feel so full I can barely move. I get really negative in my head and I tell— and I get into a real dark spiral. I say really mean shit to myself. I feel really down. I feel stuck. I feel irritated. I feel depressed that I can't change. That's just as real as the anticipation. The consumption was pleasurable. The consequence was painful. So when you start adding into your food decisions, how will I feel when I'm finished? 5 seconds after I take my last bite, how am I going to feel? When you start considering that when you're making the food choice— see, because what you're doing at most is you're saying, oh, I shouldn't eat the ice cream because I'm going to gain weight. Well, the gaining weight is too far in the future. It's not motivating. When you start training yourself to think, how will I feel 5 seconds after last bite? That's very motivating because it's just 5, 10, 15 minutes away, and your body and brain start to make different decisions, start to think about it differently. Yeah, that's a good one, Jen. Thanks for sharing that. Uh, yeah, Lois says, I've stalled on weight loss again, but clothes are getting looser and body measurements are smaller. Um, yeah, nice. Ah, Primo says, I'd have my pretzels rather than the million. I doubt it. I doubt it. But, you know, okay, there's people that say that anyway. So some people, you know, again, there's Moving towards and moving away. Some people are more risk-averse, and some people are more pleasure-oriented. So you know a flip way to put that is if you take the person you care most about in your life, and I said if you eat those pretzels, you never see them again. Would you eat the pretzels, or would you take the person? So we got two ways to go at that, but I doubt you turn the million dollars down anyways. What's up, Marissa? Marissa says, "I feel like I have disconnected the feeling of hunger and fullness." 54-year-old female, hormone-related. Um, I'd been skinny all my life due to over-caffeinated disordered eating, but now off caffeine and yo-yo up and down 10-15 pounds for years now. Um, I know I don't think that's hormone-related as much as it is mindset-related. I think, you know, in this culture we're just— we're taught and trained to be disconnected and disassociated from our, our fullness signals, our kind of subtle internal cues, our internal thoughts and feelings that are very subtle. Uh, we haven't really trained or learned how to tap into those, so More often than not, I find that the hunger-fullness thing has less to do with any sort of physiological thing and much more to do with that you haven't really learned how to connect to and measure and be aware of your hunger-fullness signals. And that's a skill you can develop and program yourself. Then that's the main— one of the main skills is managing our hunger. We're absolutely managing our hunger. So you have to first develop the awareness of what's hungry, what's full. What's satisfied, getting more aware of that. And then we really just fixate on how can I feel slightly hungry? That's a space we spend a lot of time in when we want to lose weight. How can I live slightly hungry comfortably and move through the day that way? And so of course that, that, you know, requires that you have some sense of where your hunger's at. But it's a skill set. It's a skill set you can develop. And, um, it's not that hard, but you probably just never have done it, you know. Uh, what's up, Patricia? Patricia says pre-diabetic, 6.5 A1C, 30 pounds overweight, heart disease, female, age 72. Suggestions? Um, yeah, Patricia, I mean, what I would suggest, Patricia, is right now type mind, M-I-N-D, into the comment and it'll automatically send you a link. And then go listen to the hypnosis session that I send you. It's 14 minutes, The New Thin Me. Because I know with all those things that if you could relax a bit, that would be helpful. Let's start by relaxing your mind and your body. So that's what I'll help you do. Let's put some good ideas into your mind. And then what I would love you to do, Patricia, is watch the training I give you. I see you wrote that, Ames. That's only on Facebook. Sorry, sorry, TikTok. But Ames, you— if you haven't done it yet, Ames, you, you go click the link in my bio. You just click the picture of me up there in my bio. Um, there's a link you can go get it. But yeah, hit Mind and you'll get the hypnosis session, but then watch the training Reprogrammed. I think this is my best training I've ever made. 20 minutes, I'll completely reframe how you think about weight. And I think that, um, that'll really help you, uh, Patricia, because the age is nothing. I mean, you know, age is something. I'm not gonna sit here and say age is nothing, but, um, you certainly can still change because the change isn't to lose weight so much at this point, it's to feel way better. You can feel way Fucking better before you even lose any weight. That should be the goal first, folks. Okay, I want you to lose weight too. No one wants you to lose weight more than me, I promise you. But why not feel better first? It's way easier. It's way easier to feel a lot better, like today. You can feel better today. You go listen to my hypnosis session, you'll feel better today because that'll be the most relaxed you felt in as long as you can remember. If you watch the training I made for you, you'll feel even better because you'll feel hopeful and you'll start to understand what actually is going on. You'll feel a sense of understanding that will make you feel better. And this is the coolest part: as soon as you— if you opt in for the hypnosis session, now you're on my email list. And starting Sunday, I'm giving you a whole free email program forever, as long as you want it. So get on there. I'm going to give you a focus each week to focus on. I'm going to give you a little tiny little email training message each day. It's a little, little one just to keep you engaged. And then I got the training. I give you more stuff than anyone. I got so much stuff lined up for you. But the first step into that is to go get that hypnosis session and go watch it. And then go watch it and say, oh, it's a bunch of bullshit, and come on here and argue with me. Or say, holy shit, um, and ask me questions about how to apply it to your life. I'm here every Monday through Friday. I'm here for you folks. I promise. I really am. I've been doing this for almost four years. I'm not going anywhere. I'm here. I just keep finding better and better ways to help more and more people. But this is actually, this really is a big moment because Sunday it starts. It's free. It's free if you had just joined. You've never heard of me and just join and get on my email list. It's free if you have been in the program and now you're not in the program. You're not part of Thrive. You're gonna get an email that's gonna coach you a bit. It's going to keep you in the game for free. So I'm excited about that. If you're already on my list, you don't got to do anything. You already did. You'll just get it. Yeah. Those are skills I have to develop, hunger-full skills. Not sure if it has to do with possible leaky gut or that type of issue. Um, no, it probably doesn't. I'm not saying that's not a factor, okay? But I'm saying most of the times the hunger-full is really— it's a mindfulness exercise in my opinion. I think my full, full hunger signal awareness is a mindfulness exercise primarily. There, there's, there's mechanics behind it too that I think are important to understand. The hunger scale, right? So if you don't know about the hunger scale, that's a big piece. So you need to have some of that knowledge, but it's primarily a mindfulness. And we use the redo rehearsal technique and program yourself then to help us develop awareness of, of hunger fullness signals as well. But it is, it is a, um, it is a good, uh, it's something you have to consistently work at. I'll give an example. I'm working at, in music, I'm working on intervals, right? So you may know that a scale, let's just say, has 7 notes in it, right? Ascending or descending. And each one of those is an interval. So you can go from the root note to the 3rd, and that sounds like something. You go from the root note to the 5th, and that sounds like something. You could play the 6th degree of the scale, and that sounds a certain way. Now, to me, it all sounds the same, but I'm training myself to hear the first to third, first to third, first to third. What's it sound like? What's that sound like? So I'm training myself to understand that. And hunger-fullness signals are in that ballpark, but easier, I would say. Um, but, but it just takes a little bit of consistency and focus and mindfulness. And once you have the skill, I think Um, boy, boy, does it make things a lot easier moving forward, you know? Yeah, Carolyn. Yeah, yeah, exactly, Carolyn. Yes, staying mindful in the moment. Yes, Pamela says there's good support in this program. Yes, there is, and it's only getting better. Like I said, I got— I, I know I say this all the time, but, um, there's been a lot of stuff going on behind the scenes and a lot of it's resolved now. And like I said, that's why I'm so excited about Sunday, and even Sunday happening I'm super excited to be able because now what this allows me to do, and this was the last itch I just had to scratch. It was I take it. This is a mission for me. My mission in life is to help as many people as possible live at their goal weight. And so for me, I've always had a hard time. I want to help everyone, and I know not everyone can get the program. I get that. And so I still want to be able to help everyone. I do think getting on here helps people. Um, I think all my videos I make, I think, help people. But I think what helps people the most, and I know this for a fact, is the consistency. And so being able to send you an email every day with something valuable in it that can help nudge you in the right direction, that consistency I think is one of the most important things necessary for you to change. So to be able to offer this to literally everyone, um, is very exciting. Right now, obviously, if you're in the program, there's a lot more things. You know, there's hypnosis sessions, trainings, lives. There's a lot more stuff. So please understand, um, that there's a lot of value you get if you invest in yourself as well. Okay, but, um, I now can officially say that I'm really, really happy with all the free things and support that I'm able to give you. And the best thing of all is that I will literally be able to support you forever. So there is no— there's no course that ends. There's no, you know, you email sequence that ends. I'm literally able to help you for as long as you want that help, um, whether you want to pay for it or not. And so I'm super excited about that. So anyways, if you want to get that, again, go to, uh, click the link in my bio. If you're on TikTok, um, go get that hypnosis session. Again, you'll automatically get all the things I was talking about. Uh, if you are on Facebook, all you have to do is write mind, M-I-N-D, into the comments and it'll automatically send you all those things and you'll be part of it. Uh, if you are on YouTube or some other place where you're listening to this, you can always go to programyourselfthen.com, um, or click around my bio or descriptions and you'll see links there as well. But they'll all bring you to the free hypnosis session. Go get that, because once you're in there, you're on the email list and you'll get all those other things. So if you like this here as well, um, it is, uh, I'm here every Monday through Friday. So if you like this and you want to talk about weight, you want to ask for specific questions Get on here and ask them. I'm happy to help you out. And if you can't make the live, it's also a podcast so that you can, um, uh, listen anytime you want. All right, and I see you. I appreciate you saying that, Pamela. Pamela says, uh, yeah, this program has brought much to mind that I've not thought about in years. I appreciate that, and that's what I hear all the time. Um, and again, you'll get that with all the free stuff, is you'll see that there's a different way to think about all this. And I think that's the most exciting thing, is that when something you've been struggling with for a long time, you're able to see from a different angle. And it's one of the most exciting things there is. So go check that out. Uh, all right everyone, have a super duper, super duper weekend and we'll talk soon. Bye!