Trade Shame For Curiosity To Lose Weight

Hey everyone, and welcome to today's Program Yourself Thin podcast. Today we're talking about Trading shame for curiosity to lose weight. One of the biggest psychological, emotional challenges that you have to deal with is the feeling of shame for your behaviors in the situation you've gotten yourself into. So if you're overweight, you probably feel shame about it. And every time you overeat or choose the wrong food, you probably feel shame, the shame response. The problem is this shame response keeps you imprisoned. It keeps you trapped because what's really going on, what the shame is protecting is behaviors that are causing the problem. What I mean is when you overeat and you feel shame and don't look at it, what happens is it leaves the behavior intact to run again. And so you're basically, shame is like, kind of, I'm doing this here because it's another form of denial. It's a form of denial, right? So we do something, eat the wrong thing, and then we feel ashamed of it, which means I don't want to think about it. It's the feeling that stops us from thinking about it, because the more we think about or focus on it, the more shame we think we're going to feel. But the reality is that the more you think about that thing, the less shame you feel. And this is why I say if you trade shame for curiosity, It's one of the most important shifts that you can make when it comes to your weight, because the next time you eat the wrong thing or you eat too much and you start to feel shame and you say, wait a second, no, let me get curious instead. Now what happens is you can start reflecting and wondering what happened there. I want to lose weight. I want to eat better. What, what, what's going on here? There's no need for shame. There's room for understanding. And we understand through curiosity. We get curious. Curious. Why would I do something that I don't want to do? Hmm. Let me think about that. And once you start doing that, what are you going to notice? We're going to notice, oh, I was really upset. Oh, I wasn't able to eat breakfast because I had to run out the door today. I was really hungry. Oh, I wasn't ready to be greeted with, you know, homemade cookies at work when I went in there and I lost control and ate them. Right? There are reasons why you do what you do. And the idea that you're going to feel shame about it just shuts down understanding why you're doing what you're doing. And if you don't understand why you're doing what you're doing, how are you ever going to fix it? Well, Diding says you don't need to understand why you're doing what you're doing. Just fight against it. Just stop doing it. But there's a reason it's happening in the first place. And if you don't understand that reason and resolve it, what happens with the willpower model is you basically just keep pushing down on yourself and it creates this pressure. And eventually the pressure wins and then you way overeat. You've ever experienced this? It's almost again, metaphorically, like holding an inflated ball under the water. You can do it for a little while, but eventually it's just too much pressure and the ball pops up into the air. And so it's really important that you stop with the shame because it's keeping you trapped, because it's not allowing you to recognize what's going on here. Why am I doing this? You're not overeating or choosing the wrong foods because you're a bad person. I promise you, you're doing it because it's the best strategy you have available to you in those moments. And as you start to see it as such and you start to understand it, That becomes the doorway you walk through to get to better strategies. Maybe you overate yesterday because you were sad or lonely or stressed out or angry. Well, if that's the case, there's no reason to feel shame about that. It's a reason to be curious about it so you can say, oh, when I get sad, depressed, stressed, angry, I go to food because food is the best way I know to calm myself down. Well, once you realize that, then you can start asking the magic question. What are better ways to change how I feel? What are better ways to respond to when I feel sad or stressed or angry or stressed out? And once you start getting on this way of thinking, you start accumulating better strategies, strategies that allow you to move in the direction you want to go in, whereas shame keeps you locked in the place you've been. And that's not what you want. Shame is not serving you in any way. There is no benefit from feeling shame because everything you've done that you feel shameful about, there is a reason why you've done it. And you're going to be much better served by understanding that reason than by trying to ignore it and protect it with shame. So I hope this supports and helps you give this some thought because this can be a real breakthrough. Um, when it comes to your weight. And if you want some support in thinking this way and approaching your weight with this kind of mindset, click the link in my bio or go to programyourselfthin.com. Go get the free hypnosis session I made for you. I got a bunch of other free stuff as well, but the session will kind of kickstart you on this way of approaching things where you can feel more relaxed and calm and approach things from a better perspective so that you're able to get to the results you want faster. And, uh, if you're on TikTok, you can just click the picture of me up in the top left here and it'll bring you to my bio and you'll see a link there. And if you are in Facebook or YouTube, I'm going to put this right into the chat and you can just click that link, go right there, get that free session. But yeah, if you have any questions, feel free to ask them. Hope you're all having a nice day. I am slowly recovering from a cold. You can still hear that. I think it sounds stuffy. I feel stuffy. It's ridiculous, ridiculous. I've had enough of it. What's up, Amy? Amy says she loves this subject. Yeah, the subject's great, um, because again, unfortunately— and dieting, by the way, what's dieting do? Does dieting make you more curious about why you're doing what you're doing, or does it fill you with shame when you make mistakes? Uh, we know the answer to that. Look kind of dark here over in Facebook and YouTube land. It's kind of a dark video picture, huh? TikTok kind of corrects itself, but my other camera's got me looking like I'm in the shadows over here. It is kind of a shadowy day. It's a kind of an overcast— is it raining? Kind of a rainy-ish day. Um, Jedediah Beloved says, summary of how to become thin? Um, I mean, you know, I mean, the simplest summary is just consume less calories on average, right? I mean, your, your, your weight loss always revolves around the exact same fact that you're reducing your average calorie consumption. Right. But the bigger question and the more interesting one, in my opinion, is not how to become thin. It's how to stay thin. That's my big focus. And I think that difference makes all the difference in the world. And so if I had to sum it up in the easiest way possible, I'd probably reference the goal weight pyramid, right? The pyramid of how to live at your goal weight. Not just how to get to your goal weight, but how to live there for the rest of your life on your autopilot. And I believe in order to do that, you need to fix your mindset, your lifestyle, and your eating, and learn how to run your mind. That's a little different than mindset. Mindset's the kind of like what— how to think like a thin, healthy person. And running your mind is how to change from thinking how you think into thinking like a thin, healthy person. And then on top of that, we want to learn how to think, live, and eat like a thin, healthy person. And so that's kind of the real basic summary. And I know that's not too satisfying, but again, if you're, if you're really interested in that, um, click the link in my bio, go get that free hypnosis session because I also have a training I put together and that's, that's free. And, um, you can go check that out. And I basically give you a more detailed summary, um, of how to, how to become a thin, healthy person. But I'll give you a spoiler alert. It's not. It's not like dieting. It's different than dieting. Dieting doesn't work. We all know that. I think everyone feels that to some degree. But there's a reason why dieting doesn't work. It's not because you have no willpower, because you're, you know, a weak-willed person. Oh, TikTok. There we go. Is that better? So yeah. But any questions, feel free to ask them. Like I said, I am going to be testing out I don't know what you call it, but it's like a chat thing and you'll be able to get on the— it'll only be on TikTok though. They will get on TikTok and talk to me if that's something you'd be interested in too. But that's kind of what I do for a living is coach people in real time. So to be able to do that, it's going to be kind of fun. And I guess it'll be the closest I can get to like a literal talk, call-in show, which is what I've always wanted. But the technology of that is A little daunting, I guess, but on TikTok it's kind of easy. I've learned, so I will be using that. What's up, Marta? Marta said, I am having a good conscious food day today, making choices from self-care, feeling peaceful today, still tracking, but I'm able to stop after a few bites and evaluate if I'm still hungry. That's great, nice job, Marta. Yeah, it's nice to have the good days. Now I'll tell you one thing though, like when I— we're all gonna have good and bad days, okay? That's the rest of your life. You're You're always gonna have good and bad days for the rest of your life, folks. You're gonna have bad days too. It's not a problem. You don't have to pretend that that's not the case. I think dieting— again, dieting almost forces you to live in the, the, the realm of the unreal, right? Dieting almost just assumes that the answer and the solution is to be perfect, to follow your plan perfectly. And I don't think that that's a good long-term strategy because you're going to make mistakes. You know, so what you can do, though, like when you're on track, when you have a good day and when you have a bad day, you really can learn so much from them. But don't just celebrate that you ate good that day. Start to notice why you're eating well that day, Marta. Right. So what's going on when you're making choices from self-care? Well, what's happening? Did you get a good night's sleep? Have you felt more relaxed lately? Have you been hydrating and drinking more water? Have you been eating more fruit? Have you been eating healthier? Have you just— what's going on? Success leaves clues. There's a reason why you are having a good day. Most likely. Sometimes we just have spontaneous days that come out of nowhere, right? But, um, there's almost always reasons why a day kind of goes the right way or the wrong way. And I think the more you start to understand those subtle reasons, the more you can intentionally develop those reasons, implement those reasons, um, add them to your life so that they start to run off normally. This is why, again, in Program Yourself Thin, just even the lifestyle section— let's just take that just to make my point here— but when we talk about lifestyle and program yourself thin, we're talking about 8 specific habits in order of importance: sleeping, hydration, relaxation, breathing, nourishment, movement, meditation, gratitude. Right. And the reason I've added those is because I noticed in myself and a lot of my clients would report that when they had those things working well for them, right, when they were getting good sleep, when they were hydrated, when they're relaxed, when they're breathing well, when they're nourishing themselves and they're moving, that didn't have to be all of them, but any of them, once they started kind of getting them flowing in their life, it almost always supported them making better food choices. So again, program yourself then. Is kind of a preventative approach, um, an upstream, upstream approach for those of you understand that upstream downstream, um, parable and narrative. So we're looking for more upstream stuff that we can change up here. The downstream just kind of runs the way we want it to. So for me, I focus a lot on my sleep, my hydration, my relaxation, my nourishment, movement, meditation, gratitude. I focus on these things intentionally because when I do those things, I tend to eat better naturally. So I— an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. I aim my willpower at those lifestyle habits because that willpower aimed there saves me needing a lot of willpower downstream controlling my food choices. Because when my lifestyle is kind of flowing, when I'm kind of locked into a healthier kind of mode and lifestyle, I tend to just make better food choices naturally. And so does that make sense? I hope that makes sense because dieting always just presupposes that you're going to be tired, you're exhausted, you're starving, you're craving everything bad. You know, you're in a bad mood, you got no energy and you got to make the right decision. That's what dieting is assuming. And I think that's the wrong assumption because I think we have to look at that deeper level that precedes the behavior. When you're rested and relaxed and calm and hydrated and nourished, you think differently, feel differently, and eat differently than when you're stressed, dehydrated, undernourished, exhausted, in a bad mood. Right? So to me, it's like, I want to go to that deeper level and I want to support the person I want to be because once I've done that, I've done 80% of the work. Because once I'm in a good headspace, I feel good, I'm hydrated, all the rest of it, the good decisions tend to flow out of me. I mean, I still gotta manage them, you understand? I'm still managing things, but it takes— it's a lot less effort. So nice job, Marta. I said I'm not looking for answers anymore. I know what I need to do when it comes to my food issues. I have enough knowledge. Action is needed. Um, you never have enough knowledge. I mean, but it's, um the action, the new action comes out of new knowledge though. I will tell you that, you know, because it's fine. It's one thing to know. I'll give you an example in a different context, but I can sit here and in 5 minutes tell you how to swing a golf club. Right? So you've never swung a golf club before. I can say, okay, you put this hand here and this hand here, did it, did it. And you stand like this and your shoulders are like this. And this is like this. And I explain everything to you. And you say, oh, I got all the knowledge and I got all the knowledge I need to swing it. Stop talking. I got it. Well, okay, fair enough. But what's really going to allow you to start swinging that golf club appropriately is kind of having those micro knowledges. Oh, it feels this way and I do this and I take a deep breath and I kind of let it— you know, it's the subtle things that really make the difference. So, yes, I'm sure we all have enough top-line knowledge. We all have enough of— right. Because top-line knowledge when it comes to weight loss is just eat less calories and move more. Okay, well, that's simple to understand. But to actually do that, it's just like the piano. The piano is simple to play, right? You just basically hit the right keys in the right order at the right time. Simple, right? But that description versus the reality of sitting at a piano and playing a song are two totally different things. So yes, we can have a lot of top-line knowledge and understand it. But the real secret, in my opinion, is understanding the subtleties, the little subtle things, the little thoughts you have. The emotions you're experiencing, the little behaviors you have that support you and the ones that pull you away from where you want to go. Those are the parts, right? And, and that's what leads to action, you know? And a lot of people kind of miss that because, oh, I know what to eat. You know, I hear that all the time. People tell me, I know what to eat, Jim, just tell me what to do and I'll do it. No, no, I could tell you what to do and you won't do it. That's what every diet has proved. If, if just being told what to do is enough, no one would have a weight issue because all the diets work if you followed them. The problem is you can't get yourself to follow them consistently, and I would say that's because you don't know how to follow them consistently. That's what I think. What's up, Amy? Amy says, so happy that my self-loathing is over. I feel so much better, calm. I'm not in a hurry. Oh, that's wonderful, Amy. I want y'all to hear that too because that's the secret— not being in a hurry. Dieting is not your friend. Dieting is a psychological operation to keep you overweight that was created by the food processing companies. The food processing company, um, owns all the big diets. The diet's just a branch of the food processing company. You're saying, Jim, what are you talking about? Weight Watchers was owned by Heinz. Jenny Craig was owned by Nestlé. Uh, Atkins Food Products, owned by the same company, owns Annie Ann's Pretzels and Cinnabon. Um, Cinnabon, uh, SlimFast, owned by the same company owns Ben Jerry's ice cream. That's what I'm talking about. What I'm talking about is that every big diet that you have internalized and that you reference subconsciously about how to lose weight, uh, has been backed by big food companies. Do you think big food companies are going to really back a solution that's going to allow you to get control over your reading and your health and your happiness and end up eating less of their products? Or does it make more sense that they would bankroll a process that actually made you eat more of their products? Well, there you go. That's dieting for you in a nutshell. Dieting does not work long-term. Relax. I mean, it works. I lost 30 pounds on it. No. Did you keep it off? I don't give a shit if you lost 30 pounds on your keto plan. I don't give a shit. Because I don't care if you lost 30 pounds. I care if you can keep it off and live that way. And so in that, with that definition, dieting absolutely does not work. There's not one single diet that is better than the rest. They all suck. They are all equally ineffective. Dieting doesn't work, and it doesn't work because it's a mindset, a broken mindset. And that's why the food industry spends so much money on installing that into all of our brains. That's why 75% of the population's overweight or obese. Because dieting does not work. Well, it works. Dieting works to make you overweight. Dieting works to get you to overeat food. Dieting works to get you to obsess on food. Dieting works to get you to crank up the food noise in your mind. So dieting does work. It just doesn't work to help you manage your weight the way you thought it did. But nice job, Amy. Yeah, not self-loathing is, is a nice, a nice way to approach this whole thing. And that's what I was talking about in the beginning, you know, is that to give up the shame, replace the shame for curiosity, and you'll be better off. Yeah, if you have any questions, ask him. He says, I'm a woman with ADHD and binge eating disorder. It's very hard to stay consistent. Um, yeah, I get that. I totally get that. It's hard for everyone to stay consistent, but we need to reframe this. It's not hard for you to stay consistent. It's hard for you to build new neural networks that allow you to behave differently. It's different. It's different. And so what dieting has done as well— I mean, it's just such a broken mindset to begin with, but dieting is all about what you're not going to do. Right? Most diets are about, this is how I normally eat. Now I'm going to diet and I'm not going to eat that way. Very rarely is the diet truly about what you're going to eat. You know, even if it's a Mediterranean diet, which is a diet about what you're going to eat, you internalize it typically like, oh, it's lunchtime. I usually have a burger and fries, but I can't have a burger and fries today because I have to have some Mediterranean food. You know, so, so even though it may say, oh no, eat this, this is about what to eat, to eat. Your mind interprets it as I can't eat my burger and fries now. And this is what creates a lot of pressure for you when you attempt to lose weight is you basically are trying to fight against yourself. You're fighting against your normal routines and behaviors, and you've all seen how that fight usually ends. Okay, so I get it, Dee, and I don't disagree that being consistent is difficult, but to me, my entire focus is on how do you be consistent? What is consistency? What is a new normal? How do you do that? And I don't believe dieting sets you up to do that, which is why I don't care about losing weight. Losing weight is just a temporary thing you do to get to your goal weight. Your goal is not to lose weight. Your goal is to live at your goal weight. And so if you want to talk about consistency, you need to begin right from the beginning with how you articulate your goal. What is your goal? Well, if you're like most dieters, you're going to say your goal is to lose the weight and get to my goal weight. I just want to lose the weight, Jim. That's my goal. And you can feel it in your head. I just want to lose the weight. It just feels— that's what you say a million times a day. It rolls right off the mind's tongue. I just want to lose the weight. I just want to lose the weight. I don't give a shit. I just want to lose the weight. What if you've been chasing the wrong goal your whole entire life? Hmm, is that possible? If all you focus on is losing weight, I bet you're overweight. That's the, the, the irony of it all. And again, it starts right with the goal that you set for yourself. The goal of losing weight versus the goal of living at your goal weight— those are two separate, completely separate goals. It's the difference between saying I need to make a lot of money and I want to be wealthy. I— they may sound the same, they are not. They are not, because one keeps you in a constant state of stress where you think you need to magically make a bunch of money, get-rich-quick schemes. The other one is a slow, long-sustained approach to generating wealth. They're two completely different mindsets that are going to bring you to two completely different places. And the same is true with your weight and your body. So I get it, D, and while you may with ADHD have a bigger challenge than the average person, where you're just like everyone else is that you're probably trying to focus on losing weight and not binge. And it's hard to stay consistent. But what's consistency? Not binging. Again, if your goal is to not do something, it's not really resonating with your mind completely. The ultimate goals are things we want to do, not things we don't want to do. Hope that makes sense. And you need every little trick at your disposal, D, because you do have some challenges with the ADHD. Everyone's got challenges. Everyone's got challenges and strengths, you know. And ADHD, there's challenges with that, but there are also strengths that come with it as well. Tiger Lotus says, I'd never heard anyone put it like that before. Yeah, well, I appreciate you saying that, and it's crazy. That's what I'm here for, folks. You're not going to hear anyone talk about this the way I do, virtually. I'm sure there's someone, but I've been doing this for a long time. I don't know who. I've never heard anyone talk about this way, and I think the reason why is everything I'm saying to you comes from people who have lost weight and kept it off for at least 2 years. My reference point's different than the average dieter. The average weight loss expert, because all they care about is how fast you can lose weight. All I care about is staying there, living at your goal weight. We're not built the same. We're talking totally different things. And I will tell you that focusing on losing weight as fast as you can is a dead-end street. It's a— it's not a dead-end street. It's a roundabout. It's a— it's a rotary. You just keep spinning, folks. How long have you been trying to lose weight as fast as you can? If you're 10, 20, 30, 40 years of that, what are you waiting for? What are you waiting for? It's not going to work. It doesn't work. It's not you. It's not your willpower. It's a broken system. And once you get a better system, you get better results. That's how it works in life. You know, you can't put you on a hamster wheel and expect to get far away, right? You get a hamster wheel and you end up in the same spot. You never moved, you never left. And that is what dieting is. You never get anywhere new. Jesus Christ, y'all been dieting for decades and you're not any further along than when you started. That's the craziest thought. I know it's depressing in a sense, but Jesus, feel a little depression. It's not the end of the world. Feel a little sad that you have been misled with dieting. It hurts. I get it. But at least acknowledge it, accept it, and move on with a better plan on a better path. Dieting doesn't work. It's never going to work. It's not a mindset to live at a thin, healthy weight. It's a mindset for an overweight person to try and lose weight quickly for a little while. And you're getting the exact results that I would expect you to get on a diet, because a diet is not about living at your goal weight. It's about temporarily losing weight. And that's exactly what it's done for you. You have temporarily lost weight on diets only to go back to your normal weight, which is where you spend most of your time. And you blame yourself. You think it's your willpower. You think it's your motivations. You're, you're you that's screwing up. It's the diets. How can diets— you know, here's the stat. 85 to 95% of dieters that lose the weight and get to their goal weight, the successful dieters, 85 to 95% of them put the weight back on. So when something fails 85 to 95% of time, I don't know how you're still blaming yourself and taking responsibility for that and not at some point questioning that thing. Uh, Peter says, thank you for saying that you're saying that losing weight is not good but kept it off. That's so true. Yeah, of course we need to focus on living at our goal weight, living at our goal weight, not losing weight. Losing weight's a temporary process. Living at your goal weight is a permanent one, and that makes all the difference in the world. And TikTok, I don't know if I feel like I'm missing some comments. I apologize if I am, because I'm seeing like comments that might be referring to something I'm not seeing them. TikTok's comments for me are a pain in the ass. Amy says, after listening to you, it seems that the weight set point is baloney. Um, yeah, I think it's baloney. I mean, there are real pieces to it, you know, I, I get it, but the biggest weight set point that exists in you folks is not physiological, it's psychological. You're psychologically programmed to be overweight, folks. Does that make sense? You're programmed to be overweight and that is your new normal. Your normal is being overweight. When you're not paying attention to diets or you're eating or you're exercising, you're not micromanaging what you're doing. You're just living your life the way you eat, what you eat, when you eat, how much you eat, the way you do it automatically. What you consider normal is you overweight. That makes sense. So what's going on is that you don't have, you know, a weight problem. You have a programming problem. Your subconscious mind has been programmed without your permission to be overweight by the foods you choose, the food you think about, the food you eat, how much of them you eat, when you eat them, where you eat them, all this shit. It's estimated we make over 200 food decisions a day. Shocking, right? Because you're like, oh, I don't remember making those food decisions. Yeah, because they're being made in the background. Just like you don't remember brushing your teeth this morning, but you did it, didn't you? How'd that happen? Why? Because it's a subconscious program that you installed when you were a kid and now you just run it automatically 40 years later. Well, guess what? You got eating patterns that are exactly the same. And when you go on a diet, what you're doing is you're not changing those programs. You're not reprogramming yourself. You're fighting against the programs. How's that working? Well, I bet it works like this. You get all fired up, you fight against the programming for a little while, you get distracted, bored, tired, sick of it, and you stop fighting against the programs and go back to normal. Sound familiar? Your weight is not going to change long-term until you change your programming. And the specific programming again is your mindset, lifestyle, and eating programming. You were never, never even had a chance, folks. You never even had a chance. You never once have been taught how to be pro— the programs of a thin, healthy person. Dieting is not that. You've never even learned the programming of a thin, healthy person. Because I'm not— fuck your weight loss. I don't care. Someone white-knuckles themselves down 50 pounds. I'm, I'm happy. I guess. Great. You did something. You proved you can do something, but you're not going to stay there. You're not going to stay there. It's too hard for you. You haven't set up a way of thinking, living, and eating that keeps you at your goal weight on near autopilot. I have, my clients have. It's not, it's not an impossible thing. It's just something you thought was impossible. You never learned about it, and so you do the best thing possible, and the best thing possible is horseshit. You're doing the same shit your mom did 40 years later, do the same dumb shit she was doing back in the '70s, in the '80s. It didn't work for her. Here you are doing it now. It ain't working for you. It's not because you don't have willpower. You got willpower. Jesus Christ, look what you do all day, right? Either professionally successful, personally successful. I know if you're listening, there's chances are good you're an overthinking, action-taking, um, successful person in areas of your life. But when it comes to your weight, I don't know, I don't get it. I'm a fucking genius over here, and over here I'm an idiot. I don't, I don't, I don't And it makes you crazy. Makes you crazy. Right. How about this, though? How about it's because it has nothing to do with your intelligence and has everything to do with your programming. You've been programmed to think like an overweight person. Dieting is just one more overweight program that's been installed into you and you now run it automatically. But what if, what if you could start thinking differently? What if you started to think like a thin, healthy person? What if you started to live like a thin, healthy person? Look like you're toothbrushing, right? Let's just take that as an example. I don't know, you spent time learning to do that. Now you just do it automatically, right? But what if on top of your toothbrushing habit, you install the water drinking habit, a walking habit, a nourishment habit, a relaxation habit, a sleeping habit where you got good quality sleep? What if you had those habits and patterns and programs installed into your subconscious mind that you did naturally and automatically? What if you had a slow eating program installed? What if you had a healthy eating program installed? What if you had an anti-fast food program installed? Oh, Jim, what are you talking about? That doesn't make— oh yeah, well, what do you think about cigarettes? Do you think positively about cigarettes or you have a negative response to them? If you're a smoker, what do you do when you think about certain substances that are illegal that ruin people's lives? Do you have a— do you feel like you want to move towards them? Are you— oh, Oh, I don't want that. See, that's what a program feels like. It runs automatically in the background, and your programming is all there to make you overweight. That's why it's so easy for you to be overweight. Listen, is there hyperpalatable foods that are addictive? Absolutely. But the core problem is your mindset, folks. You've been programmed to be an overweight person. It's that simple. Now, it's simple but not easy to change it. I'll be the first to admit that. But I promise you, dieting is, is just a Band-Aid, a shitty Band-Aid, and the real solution is reprogramming your mind. Anita says, understanding that it's not all or nothing keeps me consistent. Thanks, Jim, you articulate what I am following successfully, but I am unable to express your plan as you do. You're the guru, friend. Well, thank you. Yes, I've been doing this for a long time, you know. I've been doing this personally for over 30 years. I dropped 50 pounds over 30 years ago, and I've been living at the same weight for 30 years. Over 30 years. I had one blip where I put 25 pounds on, you know, but I've been able to maintain the same weight. Why? Because I reprogrammed my mind. I reprogrammed my lifestyle. I reprogrammed my eating patterns to that of a thin, healthy person. And so now what I do pretty much automatically, just like I brushed my teeth this morning, I do a bunch of things that keep me at my goal weight. I'm still watching it. I'm still managing a bit too. I'm not going to say it's 100% automatic. But it's way more automatic than any dieters experiencing. Does it feel automatic when you diet, folks? Does it feel automatic or does it feel like a struggle every day? And well, if you're like most dieters, it feels like a struggle every single day. And it is a struggle because you're fighting against yourself. That's the first sign you're doing something wrong. Jesus Christ, you could be on a diet for a year and it still feels like you're fighting against yourself. And the second you slip up, it can all disappear in a moment. That's how you know you're not even touching your programming. You're just fighting against it. And fighting against your program has pretty consistent results of failure. You don't get the results you want regardless of how much effort and time you put into it. And you're experiencing that. You're experiencing it right now. And so they come through and now they're going to sell you the solution. They, they, they give you the problem and now they're going to sell you the solution with GLP-1s. But guess what? GLP-1s aren't the ultimate solution. I'll see your GLP-1. I'll see your best-case scenario GLP-1, and I'll put my best-case scenario program yourself in success story against it. And there's not, not even a contest. How could you compare injecting yourself forever so that you feel half nauseous and half full for the rest of your life versus transforming your mindset, your lifestyle, and your eating so that you can live as the best version of you at your goal weight for the rest of your life on your autopilot. It's not even a comparison, but you never really hear about that side of things because there's not a lot of money made in the solution. There's not a lot of money made for the population to live as thin, healthy, happy people. That's not where the money comes from. I don't know, maybe I'm paranoid. Maybe. I don't know. What's up, John? John says, what are the theoretical health benefits of living at your goal weight compared to being 15 pounds over your goal weight? I don't know. Not much. Not much. I mean, if you're 3 feet tall, there might be some considerable ones, but yeah, no, there's not much of a difference health-wise statistically. Right. Everyone's different. So, you know, get that out of the way. But that's another— that's a nod towards the BMI chart. And I think a lot of people misinterpret that chart statistically, whether you're in the normal range or the overweight range, your health could be the same. It's no— there's no indication that being in one or the other, you're going to have better health as you start moving towards obese. Yes, statistically, you're going to start to have more health issues. Okay. But when you're in the normal range and most of the overweight range, your health numbers can be the same. And then just depends more on your lifestyle, genetics, things like that. And I think that's important to recognize that once you're in the normal or overweight range on the BMI chart, at that point there, your goal weight really just comes down to, you know, your own personal preferences. But in terms of health, the normal overweight range, you can be virtually the same level of health. So yeah, 15 pounds, I don't think there's going to be a lot of health benefits you're going to get that are going to be substantial. So, um, Artis says, I'm working on realizing when I am truly hungry and stopping when just about satisfied and addressing emotions, hunger. Now I'm shopping more. Sure, that's all right though. Sometimes shopping is a nice solution to the eating piece of it, you know. Um, so that's great. Nice job, Marta. Yeah, if you have any questions, feel free to ask them and I'll show you. I mean, again, I'm not just talking a bunch of shit over here. I will show you how what I'm saying is extremely specific to your situation, because what I'm saying is directly— if you're a person who's overweight, or a person who's at their goal weight and like struggling Right? Because again, you know, I know you all think like, oh, just being at your goal weight's the most amazing thing in the world. But if you're white-knuckling it every day, it's not the best thing in the world. It's not. Don't tell me it is. People— again, dieting kind of creates this delusion that being at my goal weight— because I say, okay, someone's losing weight, and I said, what are you going to do once you get to your goal weight? So I'm going to figure it out then. What are you going to figure out? What are you going to figure out? Well, What's going to motivate you then? Because again, most dieters give up the pleasure and the excitement of the food for the pleasure and the excitement of the weight loss, right? The scale and it going down replaces the food excitement and our focus, right? And what happens though when the scale stops going down? You get to your goal weight. What's motivating you then? Now, if you're like most dieters, what motivates you then? What, you fucking idiot, Jim? What's motivating me now is I'm at my goal weight. Oh my God, I'm at my goal weight. I'm just so fired up about being my goal weight that I would never overeat again. Okay, well then what happened the first time when you were at your goal weight? Because everyone's been at their goal weight. So when you were there and it was so amazing, why did— how did you get overweight? What happened? I don't say this to be a dick. I think we've got to recognize these things. We have got to acknowledge the uncomfortable things about weight loss because dieting doesn't have any answers at all for them. So let's go into the hard questions so we can reveal once and for all that dieting isn't going to fucking work for you. It's never going to work. It's not your fault. It's a broken strategy. And the sooner you stop fucking dieting is the sooner you can actually start to manage your weight. And that's where you can start with what's motivating you. If it's just to lose weight, it ain't going to last because you have already lost that weight. You didn't just, you weren't born at the weight you're at. You didn't go to bed one night and wake up 50 pounds heavier the next day. That's not how it happened. You were at your goal weight. So what happened when you were at your goal weight that led you to be overweight now? I know it's uncomfortable, but I want you to think about this, and I don't want you to ever fucking start another diet until you answer this question, because I don't want to waste your time. There is literally nothing worse. You think being overweight is bad, but the only thing worse than being overweight is when you're overweight and then you lose the weight and then you put it back on. That is like the worst of the worst. It's so destructive. It sucks so much. I don't want you to go through that. So I would rather you get your ducks in order before you go and lose the weight so that you do not lose the weight only to put it back on again. I don't want that for you. Okay, Chris isn't the same now, but addicted to buying fragrances. I can see that. I love fragrances. But here's my big question about fragrances, and I was saying this the other day. How do you even test? Like, how do you go to a store and like evaluate fragrances? Because it's like once you smell one, that shit is just in your nose. Is there a secret people know? Please share it. I was talking to my kid about this. He didn't know either. What's up, Sanjita? How's it going? Uh, Lois says, my doctor says there's no real benefit from being under 25 BMI if you use the BMI chart. He wants me to use a range of 120 to 130 in there somewhere. Yeah, I mean, and again, the BMI chart's just a reference point, just one reference point. It shouldn't be your entire decision-making process. You know, I think it's a fine ballpark to get yourself into, but then ultimately a real goal weight is one that's based around your preferences, your lifestyle, your— who you are as a person. Everyone's different. You know, that's a whole other thing. I think choosing your goal weight is just such a key part of this process. And I think no one knows how to choose their goal weight because no one has been taught how to choose their goal weight. You've been given your goal weight. The BMI chart's not teaching you how to pick your goal weight. It's giving you the goal weight. Oh, how tall am I? That's what I should weigh. No, stop it. Stop it. Again, it's a data point. I think you should— and again, it depends, right? You all know this probably. The BMI chart is really— if you're, if you're a white middle-aged European man, that it's really a valuable statistic. But, you know, if you're not that, right, if you're a person of color, if you're shorter than average, right, if you're a bodybuilder, the BMI chart falls apart. It doesn't mean anything. So it's just a reference point for things. And for a lot of people, it's not even a good reference point, but it's just a start. So BMI, I look at it as kind of just a chart. I just want to give myself some ballpark in this ballpark, right? And then how do I, how do I zero in from there? Well, that's when I start taking into account what Why, why do I want to weigh what I want to weigh? I know that may sound like a strange question, but you all haven't thought about it enough. And this gets to my main point, that if you are struggling with your weight, the first thing you've got to figure out is your motivation. Your motivation is, is broken. You weigh what you want. Let me put it that way. You weigh exactly what you want right now, subconsciously. Um, so That's one thing you gotta fix. Uh, what's up, Jackie? Jackie says, how do you program yourself with the new habits? Is it just by doing them more, like less junk food, more movement, going to bed sooner? How do you make new habits stick and stop the bad habits like overeating? Um, yeah, I mean, again, you, you can't— here's the thing, here's a basic neuroscience principle: you can't eliminate old wiring. So the bad habits you have, you can't get rid of them. They ain't going nowhere. Tough shit. I wish it wasn't that way. Okay. But it is. So yeah, you're not going to get rid of your old habits. They're not going anywhere. That would literally break a law of neuroscience. So it's not going to happen. So what's the next alternative? That you can wire new habits in. And so just to be very. Literal and specific. We want to use the right language. So yeah, we want to make that distinction. Now we could say, okay, I have a bad habit of eating ice cream at night and I'd like to change that. So it's fine to start by saying, okay, I don't— I don't want to do this, I want to change it. But to not eat ice cream at night, technically that means you're doing something else at night. So we don't want to frame— we don't want to have not eating ice cream as being the central part of our goal. Let me just back up why your subconscious mind does not understand negatives, right? So if I tell you to get your willpower together and don't think about what I'm about to say, right? Get your willpower ready. Don't think about a banana. Do not think about a banana. What are you thinking about? A banana, right? And you have to, right? Because as soon as you hear the sound waves that make banana, your visual cortex lights up and you're imagining a yellow fruit. Okay. So don't think about banana. Just makes you think about a banana. So when we're, when we're doing this work of programming ourselves, we want to be very literal. And again, we can start by saying, I don't want to eat any more ice cream. That's fine. But we don't want to end there. We do not want our goal, our weight loss goal to be, I don't want to eat more ice cream. Why? Because that fixates and focuses you on ice cream. And that's what almost every diet does to you, by the way, is it not? That's very intentional because again, the diets are there to make you overweight and unsuccessful. So we can start with, I don't want to eat ice cream at night, and we can turn it into, what would I like to do at night? What do you want to do at night? In an ideal world, what would you do? Nights in the past when you haven't eaten ice cream at night, what have you done? And that's how you start to program yourself. So what do you want to do? So all habits that we're looking to influence are habits we're looking to install. And all habits installed neurologically are just neural connections. And so at first, let's say I want to have— I want to go for a walk at night. I never— I've never done it before. I want to go for a walk at night. So going for a walk at night, the neural connections of walking, I've never done it before. They're like this. They don't exist. You go for a walk that night. Now they're like this. You go for a walk every night for the next year. Now they're like this. It's a strong neural network. That you create that starts to run automatically. Brushing your teeth— how do you think you do that? Because you don't even have to think about it, you just do it on autopilot. Because your brushing your teeth habit is— again, this is a neural connection, and there's tons of them, so it's a neural network now, and it just runs on its own. How do you drive your car? You're not thinking about every little thing. You've internalized it, and you have a neural network now where you just drive your car automatically. Okay. Is that making sense? How do you eat? Okay. You eat the same way, the same places. You choose the same foods over and over again because you have neural networks controlling what food choices you make on autopilot. And so what dieting does is it says, oh, I'm going to try and do something different and try and fight against that. But program yourself, then what we're looking to do is to install the habits and the routines that actually bring us in the direction we want it. And so how do you do that? We use two main techniques to program in new habits, new behaviors. Number one, we use behavior, right? So I want to have a habit of walking at night. Okay, go for a walk tonight. That's the most number one powerful way to install a habit. You go do it because doing it creates neural connections, which leads to neural networks. That's number one. Number two, though, is the most important in my opinion. We all know behavior is good. But when it comes to installing a new habit, going for a walk at night, we're starting from this. There's no connection. And we want to get to here. It doesn't happen in one day. It doesn't happen because you decide it's a good idea. It happens through experience. And there's only two ways to create neural connections. Number one is take action, go for a walk. But number two is the secret one that no one uses. And it's using your imagination. Because the second rule of your subconscious mind is it does not understand, um, the difference between vivid imagination and reality. And you know this, this is why you like TV shows and movies. You're not really in the movie, right? You're watching light, lights hitting your eyeballs and sound waves are hitting your ears. And that's enough for your brain to create an imagination of being in that situation. So you watch a comedy and you're laughing. You watch a drama and you're sad. You watch a sporting event, you're releasing adrenaline, literally. So the imagination going on in your mind is creating literal physiological effects. So action is one way, imagination's the other one. Imagining yourself going for a walk— go for a walk and imagine yourself going for a walk at the time you want to go for it, and that starts to create in a faster way, the neural connections that start to automate it, because we want to get to the point where it's automatic. Hope that makes sense. This shit sounded like genius stuff to me. I'm, I'm always impressed by this. I don't, I don't know, it gets funny. I don't know if I'm just crazy or delusional, but that shit is just like solid gold to me. So I hope that makes sense to you all. Uh, that's so funny. But yeah, if you have any questions, feel free to ask them. Silicon Spitfire says 100% true. Yes, yes. I apologize if I miss any of your questions on TikTok. The questions here are hard to see. Miss Moss says, I can't seem to get rid of the program that tells me being thin is not safe. Okay, great though, but that's great identification, right? Again, everything starts with awareness, and you're not alone, Miss Moss. A lot of women, especially a lot of women, have a program in them that says being thin and healthy is unsafe. And sometimes that's because of an experience you've had in the past— assault, trauma, abuse, whatever— and you created the connection somewhere that being thin and healthy actually is going to make me unsafe. And sometimes it's based on real evidence, real experience. Sometimes it's just imagination. Regardless, it's going to be something that's going to prevent you from getting the results you want. So, um, great awareness, Miss Moss, because you— instead of ignoring that or just fighting against it, we want to recognize it and we want to deal with it. We want to resolve it. And the question I want to say to you is, how could you be the weight you want to be and be more safe and secure? Because I will tell you that a lot of times When now, if you're just imagining something bad, that's an easier one to get through. But if you have a real experience in the past or multiple experience in the past of when you were thinner and healthier and you got attacked or you got assaulted or something bad happened, then it's normal to create an association between those two. But what's not normal is to keep yourself back there because you're a different person now, most likely smarter, wiser. More able to protect yourself. And what you want to do is you want to update yourself and remember that you are not that person. Step into your wisdom, step into how you're a more intelligent person now who can protect yourself more effectively than you did back then. And most likely you're going to realize that you're better at it now than you were then. And once you start to realize that and you start to reinforce it, You start to let go of that old fear. So I want you to start asking the question, how could I be thin and healthy and more safe and secure than I currently am? And I want you to sit with that for a couple days. It's not just a question you ask once because it's a question you've never asked, so you have no answers. But I want you to start seeking for some answers because if you get some answers to that, genuine compelling answers, that whole limiting belief is going to fade away and disappear, most likely. So test that out, see if it helps. What's up, Chelyab? Chelyab says such great advice. Well, thank you. You're welcome. That's my goal, is to share some of this advice because you all deserve it. You all— I know you are all hard-working people. I do know this because I know that my clients are hard-working people who have done everything they possibly can to get their weight under control and have failed to do it. It's not an intelligence problem, folks. Please understand this. You're not overweight because you're dumb or you're lazy or you don't have willpower or you're addicted to food. It's none of these things. It all comes down to your programming. You have been programmed to be an overweight person and you are consistently— that program is consistently updated and maintained. You think, uh, you know, the computer or your phone is updating well, your overweight program is updating at a level beyond that. How do I know this? You are constantly getting thousands and thousands of marketing messages every day, programming you to be overweight. And all of that programming is building on top of a lifetime of programming that you have received. Without even realizing it. It's sitting right there in your mind. You have fought against this programming your whole life and you've never seen it as programming. What does Sun Tzu say? The Art of War. Know your enemy. You don't know your enemy, folks. You thought the enemy was you. The enemy is your program that was put there without your permission. That's the enemy, not you. Fuck dieting for that. I hate dieting so much. What's up, Jane? Jane says, I went down the rabbit hole last evening. There was a very long ad for a natural solution to high sugar. Watched because it was supposed to be a doctor, and they were doctors whose names I recognized. I had to listen to half an hour until I finally started the sales part. Oh my God, I'm annoyed that I fell for that again. That's okay, Jane. Again, I'm proud of you for recognizing it. We always just keep getting smarter, keep getting smarter, smarter, smarter, smarter, smarter. Pattern recognition, right, Jane? So your pattern recognition improved from that experience, and that's going to serve you as you move into the future. So, you know, it's annoying. That's okay, you can be annoyed, but also appreciate that you have refined your pattern recognition as well. Both things are true. Um, Vale says, what's your advice for someone who lives off of the 'I'll start tomorrow' mantra? Even as you speak, I'm telling myself tomorrow will be the day Love your no-nonsense method. That's a great question. Again, what's your advice for someone who lives off the 'I'll start tomorrow' mantra? That's what dieting has trained you to say, folks. It's not a mistake that every single person here has the 'I'll start tomorrow' mantra. And if you're really actually more specific about it, it's the 'I will start Monday.' 'I'll start Monday,' right? How can an entire generation all start on Monday? Because we've all been programmed by the same people to believe the same things. So how do you deal with the 'I'll start tomorrow' mantra? Well, we gotta go back, back, back to realize that this isn't about just losing weight, it's about feeling better. Uh, and when would you like to feel better? Do you want to feel better now, or do you want to feel better tomorrow? Do you want me to give you $1,000 today, or do you want me to wait to give it to you till tomorrow? Which would you prefer? You know, so this reveals that subconsciously you all associate pain to weight loss. That's why you're putting it off. Do you want me to drop the, the 10 grand off to you tonight, or do you want me to drop it off to you tomorrow afternoon? When would you like to have it? So why are you saying I'll start tomorrow? Because you assume it's gonna suck. And it does suck. Dieting sucks. Fuck, I don't wanna start a diet today. I don't wanna start it tomorrow. That's why I joke, Program Yourself Thin is the only weight loss program that people wanna start on a Friday. I have people signing up and joining the program on Christmas Day. Why? Because you know how you start the program? You listen to a 5-minute hypnosis session where you relax, you calm down, you get all this wonderful stuff put in your mind. Start a fucking meal plan. You start— no more carbs, no more sugar. Yeah, I don't want to start that either. I don't want to start that ever. That's why you don't want to start it, and that's why you want to stop it, because you associate— folks, what dieting has been meant to do on a very simple level, dieting is here to associate pain to weight loss. Isn't this crazy, folks? Think about it. The thing you want more than anything in the world. You think about weight loss 24 hours a day. It's the thing you want more than almost anything in the world. And yet you associate pain to it primarily because I say, okay, you want to start losing weight? I'll start tomorrow. Uh, I don't know. Next week. Why you want to put off one of the most enjoyable, pleasurable things on the planet? Is there anything better than being at your goal weight in a way that's comfortable and enjoyable? I think not. It's one of the most enjoyable things on the planet. So why would you want to put it off? Because you've been trained that in order to lose weight, you have to do miserable shit that you hate doing. So of course you avoid it. So it's a mindset shift initially that this is a process that never ends because you want to be at your goal weight forever, I'm assuming. And so, and it's pleasurable. But then strategically, the secret is to not start a diet. A diet is an all-or-nothing thought process. So again, the idea of starting means you're starting everything, right? What's starting mean for a dieter? This is where all diets are exactly the same. Doesn't matter what diet it is. I don't give a shit. You can name whatever diet you want— vegan, carnivore, Weight Watchers, intermittent fasting. I don't give a shit. You can name any diet you can ever think of. And I will tell you how they're all the same. How is a vegan diet and carnivore diet the same? Because of the mindset behind them. Because I don't care if you're going to be vegan tomorrow or carnivore tomorrow, you are going to jump into it 100%. Tomorrow's going to start and you're going to be 100% vegan, 100% carnivore. And that is the problem. Changing everything all at once is overwhelming. So you avoid it. But that's how you've been trained to lose weight, isn't it? Change everything all at once. That's why you avoid it. It's overwhelming. It's stressful. So what's an alternative to that? Well, in Program Yourself Then, we call it reduce the ridiculous. Let's just start with the easiest thing possible. Don't even worry about the hypnosis session. How about you drink an extra glass of water tomorrow? Let's start that. How about you go for a walk today? How about you take a minute and just relax? How about right now? You deep breath. Let's see. Oh, how does it feel so good every single time? I've never— no answers for that. It always feels good to take a deep breath and let it out, especially when you let the exhale be even longer than the inhale. Man, does it feel good. Always feels nice. I'm gonna drink some water. I don't know, I'm feeling it now. So what are things you don't want to put off that will help you with your weight? Every time I drink some water— I'm not trying to drink the whole bottle right now, I'm just taking a sip of water and it feels nice. Doing deep yoga breathing techniques here. I'm just taking a deep breath and letting it out. And while I do it, I'm relaxing my chest and my stomach and my face and my shoulders. Oh, feels nice. So the secret to managing your weight is to make it feel nice, to associate weight loss to pleasure. Because what do you think's driving your food choices, folks? It's simple. It's pleasure. Why do you want to eat the ice cream? So it's not a trick question. Why do I eat the cookies? Why do I eat the pizza today? You're putting those things off. Why would you want to put those things off? They're enjoyable. So the simple thing is that we put off things that are unpleasant and miserable, and we want to do things today that feel good. So find ways to lose weight that feel good and are pleasurable. It's not as hard as you think. Um, Kim says you put it on, then you go take a walk, and then smell it, and then go back to the counter if you like the way it smells on you. Oh, okay, I like that. But what if you want to smell two different colognes? The cologne conversation. I appreciate you give me an answer for that. Jack says, thank you, that was very helpful. Good, I'm glad. It says wow. I don't remember what you're saying wow to, some awesome thing I said. Martha says, I agree, dieting is associated with pain and disappointment. Yes, absolutely, because dieting is not your friend. Dieting is there to ruin your life and make you an overeater so that you make big profits for the food companies. Dieting is a psychological operation to make you make big profits for the food companies. Dieting makes you eat more. Um, Lennon Fox says, what do you think about weight every day? Greetings from Croatia. Um, I'm gonna assume that meant, what do you think about weighing yourself every day? And I think it's great when you're, when you're actively looking to lose weight and change your weight. I think weighing yourself every day is the smartest play Um, for most people, if you got real intense negative stuff with the scale, then maybe not, you know, and do whatever works best for you. But I find that works best for most people is weighing themselves every day. Now that requires that you change your relationship with the scale and your responses to the scale. Um, you can't just freak out every time you step on the scale and then do it every day. We're also working on our mindset, our emotional regulation while we do it. But, um, I, I can't. You would have to convince me how not stepping on the scale every day would be better than weighing yourself once a week. You know, if we take the emotional— your emotional collapse, if we take that out of the question, how could it not be more valuable to get more consistent data than less consistent data? How does that work? I'm not a scientist, but maybe there is a reason why, um, you think that, but I would love to hear it, you know. So I think weighing yourself every day makes the most sense. It's just data. It's more consistent. data. You know, the scale should be like the speedometer of your car. You're not terrified to look at the speedometer of your car. You look at it to get a sense of where you're at speed-wise. And if you're going too fast, you slow down. If you're going too slow, you speed up. Um, again, the scale— the scale is not the problem. The scale reveals the problem, which is that the scale reveals that you don't really know how to run your weight. You have no idea how to control your weight. And the scale just really makes you feel that. But so yeah, I'm a big fan of weighing myself every day and I tell my clients to do that too. Yeah, Rav says small changes work best. Yes, agreed. There's no question about that. Small changes consistently applied over time absolutely work best. Um, Green-Eyed Blonde said I only weigh myself once a week now and it's made all the difference in the world for my stalls. Um, yeah, and that's great, you know what I mean? Good, test them out. I, I'm not saying Nothing I ever say is a generalized rule for everyone, because the golden rule of Program Yourself Thin is that there is no right or wrong. There's only what works for you. Your weight is the most personal thing you get to decide. And so, you know, you figure it out the way you want to do it. I say weigh yourself every day because I know a lot of people don't do that and don't see how it's valuable. And they will tell me, well, if I weigh myself every day, I'm just going to become a raving lunatic. Well, we're not just stepping on the scale and being a raving lunatic. We're stepping on the scale in a calm, grounded, peaceful way where we're using it as data and we're using it to drive us forward in a way that works best for us. So it's not just stepping on the scale the way you always have. It's very intentionally using the scale in a specific way. So, but I'm glad that works for you again. So I'm not sitting here. I'm not sitting here trying to convince Green-Eyed Blonde to— no, no, no. You got to do it every day. I would never say that. Because I want you all to figure out what works for you. But most people haven't really done the everyday thing. And I will admit that it does— don't do it on your own. It's not going to work. But people in the program, the whole program is kind of built for you to be able to do that. Okay. But at the end of the day, whatever works for you is the right way. I want you all to know that. I want you to really hear that, because I think if you really, really hear that and internalize that, you're going to just honor yourself more, respect yourself more, and come up with a much better plan for yourself. Anita says, instead of saying I'll diet on Monday, how about I'm going to deprogram myself so I can happily live my life happily by getting to my sustainable weight for my life? Yeah, that's great, Anita. If you like that, go for it. Again, um, yeah, I'll diet on Monday. And again, but, but me personally, I don't even want to make it about weight. So if I want to start taking action today I'm not focusing on my weight as the primary thing because your weight's not going to change today if you eat well. So I don't want to put that pressure on, but I want to feel better. You want to feel better now, right? So again, the things a lot of times that help you lose weight also make you feel better now. Drinking water, relaxing, eating a piece of fruit, having a salad, making a healthy choice. Uh, saying no, um, you know, to unhealthy foods. Uh, these things make you feel better right now, so why wouldn't you want to feel better right now? Uh, Jane says, what annoys me is that now so much of what is on Facebook is deepfake ads disguised as actual information. Yes, that's just true. We live again the information age. I say this all the time. I always assumed the information age was going to be good information. I didn't know it was going to be all the information. And so, yeah, I mean, you've got to become a student of information at this day and age because the wolves are at the door. You know what I mean? Like, the wolves are around us everywhere. And it's hard to figure out who to trust. You know, I don't disagree with that. That's why I'm out here every single day for free because this is my mission in life. And this is part of like, in yoga, they call it kind of your dharma. It's kind of like the good you kind of give to the world. And that's what I do here. I'm trying to get this word out that there's another way, because once you internalize what I'm saying, it really is probably one of your best defenses from all the bullshitters out there. And believe me, when it comes to weight loss, it's 99% bullshitters. I'm not, of course, ever going to say that, but again, uh, I'm— what I'm saying is totally different than what you hear. You never hear this. I know you never hear this because I had to create all this stuff myself. So unless there's some other you know, person out there who walked the same path I did, there's no way in the world they're going to have a PYT approach. I've been working on this obsessively for over 30 years. I'm obsessed with this stuff. My father died when I was 9 of a heart attack, and there was weight shit even earlier than that, to be completely honest. Um, I've been obsessed with this. I was put on this earth to help people manage their weight. I manage my own weight, and this is my— this is my purpose for being on this planet, for the, for the world. I don't want to sound dramatic, but I'm telling you that that's what I'm here for. And I've literally been doing this professionally for over 20 years and personally obsessively for over 30 years. And, uh, I'm just, I'm so passionate about it because for me it's life and death. You know, it's not just about looking good in pictures and in your jeans. I want you to do that too, but I want you to live as long as you can. I want you to have the best quality of life while you're here. That's what's driving me to get on here every day. That's what drives me to give you all the stuff I give you. That's what drives me to create the best weight mastery program on the planet. I believe— I don't think there's a— there's no program like mine anywhere. There's nothing like it. You find me the program where the, the, the promise is that I'm going to show you how to live at your goal weight for the rest of your life on near autopilot. You tell me where else you're hearing anything like that. And I'm not— I don't expect to hear anything because I ask this question all the— I've been doing these, these lives and social media for over 3 years at this point. I ask this question all the time. I never hear— I never hear someone say any other option. Everything's diet. Everything's telling you what you should eat. No one's showing you how to get yourself to do it long term. This is the biggest reason you're struggling, you know? And I take it so seriously. That's why I'm here every day for free. I literally will help you. I'll help you through these things. And like I said, on TikTok, I'm going to start doing like live— you can talk to me if you want. We go back and forth. It's $25,000 to work with me privately. So it's like, I'm— you know what I mean? Like, I genuinely mean what I'm saying here. I want to help you. Um, Sarani says, then how to get beyond all the programming and beyond dieting, especially if you're wanting to lose and maintain? Um, yeah, again, Sarani, same thing. No, you don't want to lose and maintain. That, that's not the right language. Maintains. All right. Program Yourself. Then we start day 1 on maintenance. The whole program is about maintenance because the whole program is about living, living, living at your goal weight. Living at your goal weight is not about losing weight. That's a small little piece of it, right? You got to lose the weight first. But folks, let's do the timeline in your head. I don't know how old you all are, okay? But imagine it takes you a year, 2 years, 3 years to lose the weight. Let's just say 1 to 3 years. How long do you expect to live beyond that? That's where the focus should be. That's what living at your goal weight is. You all been focused on this much of the process when the reality is you should be focused on this much of the process. Does that make sense? So how to get beyond all the programming? The first thing you gotta do is stop walking the old path. You can't get rid of the programming if you step onto the path of weight loss and dieting. Does that make sense? Because you don't want to fucking lose weight. You don't want to lose weight. You've all lost weight and then put it back on. Are you happy you lost weight? Or are you upset that you put it back on? Weight loss is not the goal. Does this make sense? Because you can't have the goal be, I just want to lose weight, and then get rid of the programming. I just want to lose weight is literally steeped at the bottom in this programming of, of dieting and struggle. We've got to change the goal right from the beginning. That's the first step to changing the programming. That makes sense. I want to live at my goal weight. I want to get to my goal weight, and I want to live there for the rest of my life on near autopilot. That does a lot of the heavy lifting for getting you out of the old programming. Because again, dieting is about short-term results. I'm going to do this until I lose the weight. But that's not really your goal. So say what you mean and mean what you say. You don't want to lose weight, you want to live at your goal weight. Yeah, Jane says it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change. Yeah, but it's even beyond that too, because I will say I know what you mean, Jane, but that, that, that phrase grinds my gears a little bit because it's so much more than a lifestyle change too, right? It is a lifestyle change, but the lifestyle change is just one level of the pyramid. So the goal weight pyramid is having the right mindset, the right lifestyle, and the right eating, and then being able— so this is what to do, right? This is your detailed plan of what to do. And then being able to program yourself is how you get yourself to do it. But so it's not just a lifestyle change. It is a mindset change, a lifestyle change, and an eating change systematically and comprehensively working together to give you a weight change. Anita says, I've never heard anything like your program. So enlightening. And believe me, I've heard everything. No, I agree. I need— I have too. And all of you have, you know, and I just want you to know there is something different. This is something different, genuinely different, right from the get-go. And I hope I hook you with the, the point that the goal is not to fucking lose weight. Okay. The goal is to live at your goal weight. Now, listen, living at your goal weight includes the phase of losing weight. Okay. So, so that's there. It's just not the main focus. Do you want to make a bunch of money or do you want to have a bunch of money? Words matter, folks. They matter because they affect how we think about things, and how we think about things really leads to the results we get. Not in some metaphysical way, even just in literal psychological conceptual ways. And it's right— again, dieting is not your friend. Dieting is there to make you overweight and a food addict. Dieting is not there to help you live as a thin, healthy person. Hey, there's Kent. Kent said, folks, this guy's changed my life. 18 months ago, sign up. Yes, Kent's a superstar, just living at his goal weight and been there for a while now and is there comfortably. That's the point, folks, because again, I don't just want you to live at your goal weight. That's not even enough for me. I want you to live at your goal weight in the easiest, most enjoyable, comfortable way possible. When's the last time you asked that question to yourself? As much as you think about your weight, and I know you think about it constantly, I know your weight's one of the number one things you think about more than your partner, more than your family, more than your personal development, more than your work. You think about your weight. And as much as you think about your weight, never in your life have you ever articulated the goal as, I don't just want to lose weight. I want to get to my goal weight and live there the rest of my life on near autopilot in the easiest, most enjoyable, comfortable way that I can. You've never gotten within 1,000 yards of that statement, and that is what's restricting you and keeping you trapped being overweight more than anything else. Way more than your genetics, way more than your metabolism, way more than your menopause. Is the fact that you're stuck in a diet mindset that's keeping you trapped. I appreciate sharing that, Ken. Uh, Sweetcast, is your book on Audible? Not yet, but I'm getting there. That is next on the docket. I've got, I've got recording work to do, so as soon as my voice gets back, I gotta record a webinar, and then the book's getting recorded, and I will let you all know. And thank you for your patience. All right, yes, Marta says yes, it makes sense. I don't want to use food to manage my emotions. I love that you said that, Marty. Yes, really important. Um, all right everyone, when we get out of here, again, if you're not in my world, please go click the link in my bio or go to programyourselfthin.com. If you're in Facebook land, I'll put the link right there in the comments. Uh, go get that hypnosis session because it's not even just a hypnosis session. I give you a training. I got a daily email program I give you away for free. No one gives you more free stuff than I do to help you manage your weight. Go use it if it fits. It might be a miracle for you, life-changing. And I don't say that lightly. It might be absolutely life-changing for you. And if it doesn't fit you and you don't like it, then who gives a shit? You hit unsubscribe. It didn't cost you anything and whatever, you move on your way. But if it changes you, holy shit, it really does have the potential to completely transform your life. I'm telling you, I watch this every day with my clients, see it every day myself. I'm using the same system. So go check that out. It's free. If you like this, I'm here every Monday through Friday, usually around noon Eastern. So pop on here, ask your questions. I'm happy to help you. If you can't make the lives, it's also a podcast. You can listen to the whole thing anytime you want. Go to any podcast platform, search Program Yourself, then boom, pops up. Listen anytime you want. And then finally, yeah, this book's available. So if you're looking for kind of a real simple, easy way to internalize and understand everything I've been talking about, This is my book, and this book is available for sale on Amazon. You can get the Kindle version, you can get the physical version. This book's the stuff. It's very unusual in terms of weight loss books. People tell me it's the best weight book they've ever read in their lives. It is 40 chapters. Each chapter is a page or two. Each chapter is a hypnotic story that reprograms your mind to think, live, and eat like a thin, healthy person, naturally and automatically. Go check it out. So, all right, everyone, thanks so much. I really appreciate your comments as usual. Awesome. Um, I really appreciate it. Makes it worth doing. Have a super duper day, and we'll talk soon. Bye.