EP 174: Men Are More Loving Than You Think: 18 Years Working With Thousands of Men (Sasha Cobra)

Well, firstly, it's really great to have you here. Like, I've been really looking forward to this conversation and learning a lot more about you because you're one of the, you could say, prominent figures who has been in this space for a really long time and have worked with a lot of people. And I think your. Your energy speaks for itself, which I know a lot of guys and people who cross paths with. If you're attuned enough or you're sensitive enough, you can feel the frequency as someone's operating from. And I'm just so looking forward to hearing more about your journey and the world that you've been in. Working with men for the last eight years, working now a lot more with women. But, Sasha, tell me, I would love for you just to introduce yourself and for the people listening who don't know too much about you, what's your work about?

Well, let me first say that I've been doing this work for 18 years. And when I first started doing this work, I worked exclusively with men for eight years. So now it's been 18 total. And the only reason why I actually opened up the work to the women at the time is because they were begging, pleading, requesting, and I just took it as a sign and caved in and eventually opened up the work to women as well. But what do I do? I'm a teacher, healer, energy worker, with a focus on spirituality and sexuality and how to use sexual energy for healing, transformation for growth. And that's really been my focus for almost 20 years now. Wow.

Okay.

It's also, it's, you know, it's also amazing because a lot of people see, you know, influencers on Instagram, and I've been doing this work pre Instagram. I've been doing this work in a way, pre Internet. Of course, the Internet existed at that time, but it's those people that have been around for 20 years doing the same thing are the ones that have really put in their hours. And I think that nowadays it's hard to come by people that have really dedicated their life to something. I think that people are so caught up in followers and fame and marketing that true value is kind of hidden these days or it gets bombarded by so much fluff on top of it. So. Agreed. Yeah.

Well, I'm curious to know what's been the unique experience your soul has been through in this lifetime that's enabled you to be on this path, that brought you to this path where you're teaching and facilitating for in this amount of time?

Oh, I don't even know from which angle to approach that question. What my soul has been to, I guess, is what it already knew it was going to be into. I think that we definitely, before we come into this reality, this existence, whatever this may be, I think that we have a preconceived choice idea, focus on what our life will look like and what we're here to experience and explore. So I'm. I don't know how to answer that question because in the most humble way, I would say I'm just along for the ride, still trying to figure it out from a human perspective where we think that we know everything. Then I could say, well, when I was born, I like this and that, and it's true, you know, I've always had an interest in spirituality. I've always had an interest in sexuality and pleasure and really understanding the human experience. That's been huge for me, especially how it pertains to relationships, because so much of the quality of our life is based on the quality of our relationships and pleasure is a birthright, you know, so that all those ingredients were always there. A huge interest in health. It's basically like a huge interest in everything that I saw in the world that didn't make sense to me. It doesn't make sense that we are sick, mentally, emotionally, physically, as a species. It doesn't make sense that we don't have pleasure in life. It doesn't make sense that humans are unhappy. It definitely doesn't make sense that violence is common for humanity and that we are starving for love and be loved. And so my, let's say, obsession or whatever haunts me to be the Channel 4 is all around these topics is understanding what it means to be human and its truest state as a loving, joyous, pleasureful, orgasmic being.

Yeah, I feel that. Was there a specific moment when you realize, like, I'm different, I'm really different, and there's. There's something unique about what you were accessing that. That the majority want.

You know, it's a weird choice of words because while it is true that I could say I'm different, I actually feel just like everyone else with just potentially a little bit more understanding here or in a way to see something that other people don't overhear. But overall, humans are humans and we're all having similar struggles at different levels. We all celebrate the same things at different levels. So we're much more similar than we are different. That's what it comes down to. And I think that the attitude of I am different is one of the causes for the violence and inhumaness in humanity.

Agreed. Yeah. On one level, we're all connected and all the same, but then on another level, we're also all very unique. And we will have unique gifts and attributes and I believe, abilities that we have the opportunity to tap into and access in this lifetime that I would say most people or refuse not to nurture those unique abilities. And I guess what I was alluding to with that question is like, when did you understand or become aware of these unique attributes or gifts that, you know, were bestowed upon you in this lifetime? And when did you decide to, like, go all in on? Let me just like, really nurture and. And support the work that I've been put on this. This earth to do, because it sounds like you figured it out quite early.

Well, let me also say this. I think that most people never really give a lot of value to their gifts, things that come naturally to them. So, like, people that are really good at organization usually don't say, you know, they don't have this breaking point where they go, wow, I'm so good at organizing, I'm going to start organizing people's lives and charge money for it. Like, things that come easy for us are not necessarily things that we value. So when you asked me that question, the first thing that I thought of is when I was a tiny little girl and I'm talking like toddler age, and my grandmother was sick and she used to get headaches, and I used to walk over to her and place my hands on her forehead until the pain would go away. And my family used to call me Golden Hands because there was something in my hands that whenever somebody was hurting, I would just walk over and put my hands on them and cure them and heal them. But I was little. That's not something you value. It's just something that comes naturally out of you. And then I think about also my upbringing. I've always grown up around boys, men, my whole life. So all my friends were always boys growing up, when I was little, when I was a teenager, and even in my adult life up to now. And so again, it's not special skill set, But I think about what did the spirit come here to experience and what are the gifts that are created from those experiences. And so one of the reasons why I started working with men was because it was just such comfortable territory for me. I had spent my whole life being around men, being friends with men in very deep ways, so understanding their internal world, their struggles, their challenges. Basically, that was my home. In a way. And so for me, when I started doing this work, it also didn't come out of some place where I go, oh, I have a skill set. It was that I literally started having conversations with men, and then they would tell their friends, and then they would call me and say, like, can I have a session? And I didn't even realize I was doing sessions. So then I started charging money for it. And there is a big step in there that I'm skipping over, which is that I had come across a man that was doing this type of work. Work in his own version. And so everything happened very, very organically. I don't think that it's. It was ever a decision of mine where I go, I want to do this. It was more a pulling of life and me being there step by step as the past unfolded. And that's how it brought me to doing it. You know, I think that a lot of people these days, again with social media and Instagram, they see somebody and then they say, I want to do what she does, or, I want to do what he does. But they don't really allow the beauty and the magic of life to unfold and show them their path. And that's why so much misery is also created, because we're trying to be somebody that we're not.

Agreed? Agreed. Wow. So many different directions we could go here. But what came up for me was since you have such diverse and a unique experience in working with men due to the amount of men that you've worked with. I'd love to know what. What have you specifically learned about men that is not often spoken about either online or just in the general social echo chamber that we're in could be good or could be bad, or like what. What is something that you've absorbed just through the time you spent around mainly. Mainly men in the work that you've been doing.

This is going to sound so strange to anyone that has any understanding of anything, but because online and what we see societally is so backwards that what I'm gonna say is profound. Men are exceptionally loving beings that want to be exceptional lovers. They're kind, they're generous, and they're way more caring than most women nowadays. And it's unfortunate that the bad name that men have in society, not because of men in general, but because of. I'm going to call a handful of beings in male form that have been dominating and doing ungodly things to humanity historically, but it has nothing to do with the masculine. And so what we see in society Is unhealthy men, masculine traits that have really gotten a bad reputation. And so much so that it's not just women that complain about men being a certain type of way, but men have also judged their own self and not wanting to be men anymore because of these bad role models. And so something that I have been privy to and really gifted with, I mean one thing is having friends that are male and you know, you hang out with them. But it's another thing to work with men. It's another thing to sit down with thousands of men from all different cultures, all different parts of the world and hear things that they've never told anybody, like literally anybody in their life, which is their greatest secrets. And when I say secrets, you know, it's nothing bad. Secrets is to say like what have they shut down in themselves because they were ashamed to share it? And that could just be how tender they are, that could just be how much they care, that could be how insecure and unworthy they feel, how much pain they carry. You know, And a lot of the work that I did when I was working with men during that earlier time was energy work. So working with our bodies, bodywork. And one of the things that I realized working with men versus when I started working with women is that a lot of the pain that men carry, they've taken it on from outside. They've taken it on from things that they were told, things that they heard from others. The amount of abuse they've experienced, that's another thing that we don't really speak about in some society. But the amount of men that have been abused, whether that is emotionally, psychologically, physically and especially sexual abuse, because that's a topic that no one speaks about, right? And so when, when you work with a male body, you see all that stuff come out that's just like they've taken on, they've taken on. But when I started working with women, a lot of the pain comes contrary to popular belief that women carry is actually self induced. So it's not what they were told by their boyfriends or how they were beaten by their fathers. Of course those examples happen. But when you start working with females bodies, you realize that it's a lot of self hatred. It's a lot of the stuff that yes, they took on from outside, of course, but continue to abuse their own selves with which is quite different, you know. And so when it comes to men, it's so, so, so important to understand that for women to understand that the ways they speak to them, the ways that they think that all men are just unfeeling SM solid mountain that can't be moved rocks, you know, that they, they do have feelings and they do feel and they do get hurt and they just collect and collect and collect. And so while a lot of men think that they're doing great, act like they're doing great, they're really hurting inside. And there's not much space for that vulnerability. Even in men's groups, you know, even in places where men gather or even if you have your group of friends, most men don't have a place to be vulnerable. Most men don't even have a place to be vulnerable when they're alone with their own self because of the conditioning and because of their own judgment. And so I also guess that what I would want to share with everybody is, you know, what should the world know about men is that they're carrying a lot more pain than people think.

Thank you for speaking into that. You know, it's something that maybe we both have the beautiful insight as to working directly and listening to men on a daily basis, which over the last five years I've been running men's groups and coaching men, running retreats. And I'll echo everything you just shared, you know, because like the amount of beautiful, pure, like soft, gentle, like well intentioned men that I get to get in contact with on a daily that it upsets me so much sometimes around how much damage has been done onto them due to absent fathers, violent fathers, sexual abuse. And it is, it's kind of shocking to sometimes see how prevalent it is when I hear about it. And it just makes me feel super grateful that I, I didn't really grow up with any intense trauma like that, but I know how common it is and I wonder from your perspective on energetic layer now that we, now that you've created that kind of like distinction or that difference, why do you think it's so hard for men to work through some of these deeper energetic layers that are back there? And even though so many of these men are really committed to working on themselves and doing the books and doing the practices and the meditation and the things, but are still maybe unable to move through some of these subconscious layers that are still holding on, whether it's in their body or their connective tissue, or from their previous lineage, lineages and bloodlines, but there's, there's some deep stuff that's in there that sometimes can be really hard to move through. Why do you think that is? And then how do you specifically work with men on Those deeper layers to help them maybe get to the other side of it.

Sure. So the short answer is fear. Fear is what keeps them from jumping into it. And then, if you ask me, fear of what? It's going to be a few, several, a few different things, Starting with a fear of what will happen if they really let it all out. So what do I mean by that? Most humans carry what I'm going to call a healthy dose of anger. Because you cannot live in a crazy society and be kumbaya the whole time. Something in your spirit is going to feel invaded by all the nos, all the wrongs, everything that your spirit says no to. And when we have that no, it's going to build up emotion in you. Right. So anger is a beautiful, beautiful emotion. It's a beautiful feeling. It's an internal compass that helps us to navigate what is right and wrong. And when injustice is being done, when we're being disrespected, when we're being invaded or when others are. And so anger is really, in its truest sense, a gift, a friend, and a blessing because it helps us to know how to live in alignment with ourselves. When we have that sensation, when we have that feeling, it's not not to be stuffed down, it's to be creative. So if I'm angry about a situation, I use that internal compass to get creative in my life, to make necessary changes to. For example, if I'm speaking to you, you're disrespecting me, I speak to that right. Or I end the conversation. If it's on a global scale, if it's about my job, whatever it is that's making me angry, you're not, not meant to live a life out of alignment with yourself. So that emotion and that feeling is there to help spark creativity. But what do most humans do and what do most men do? They stuff it down. And when you stuff something down, it builds up more and more energy. And then what it turns into is what feels like rage to them. So then you tell them all of a sudden, oh, you gotta feel, you gotta heal, you gotta get in the. And feel through all your stuff. But when they start to feel the first layers, the first thing that they're going to feel is all that, what used to be healthy anger stuffed down and built up over time into what is called rage. And so a lot of men don't want to go there. They want to heal through Kumbaya. They want to heal through. Let's talk it out. They want to heal through all different avenues. You know, I'll go to the gym, I'll get up at 4am, I'll have discipline, I'll make my money, do all those things. But it's like, hey, you've got some deeper feelings you've got to work through. And if you don't address that, you won't be a whole man. And then the fear comes up because if I get in my body and I start to feel through all of that, I don't know what I'll be capable of doing. And that's why they never really go there. And what usually will happen, even though they don't know that, they just know that they're sitting on so much power, so much intensity, so much enraged emotion that they feel like if I tap into this, I'll kill people. No you won't. No you won't. Your power will explode. You may yell, you may need to punch a pillow a couple times, but then that river starts to flow freely. And what you will have access to is parts of your beingness that you didn't have access to before, which is intuition, lovingness, compassion, kindness at levels that you could never tap into otherwise. And the most important thing here is all those qualities are for you. I'm not talking about because you're more loving toward the world or more compassionate toward the world. I'm talking about that you become more compassionate with yourself. You become more loving with yourself, more kind with yourself. And that is so, so necessary to live a fulfilled life, to really be somebody that is wholeheartedly having the experience of worth and self validation without needing it from outside. Because what I see in a lot of men's groups nowadays is so much pumping each other up to do great things in the world. But the foundation of that is insecurity and unworthiness trying to validate themselves to be worthy. And I'm saying it's great for you to make your money, it's great for you to take care of your health, but it's got to come out of a place of self, love, creativity, playfulness, alignment, not out of I don't like me. And maybe if I just get more muscles, I'll be worthy or I don't like me, but maybe if I make some money, I'll be feeling valid to exist in the world and have a space for myself in existence, you know? And another reason why men really struggle with what I would call whole healing is they never really address their sex. And that's a huge, huge topic. So again, we're looking at men's groups and even, you know, they might do the no FAP movement. Okay, so I'm not ejaculating, but. And then what? Does it really make you a great lover if you just don't ejaculate? And that's all you do. Maybe. But there's a whole world around that decision. And so the world around it is, are you doing things again out of self punishment? Are you doing things through tension? Are you doing things through force while obsessing over sex, even though you're not allowing yourself, yourself to ejaculate? Because none of that becomes integrative wholeness. What does create integrative wholeness is your full acceptance of your desire, your celebration of your desire, your wholehearted connectedness to your penis as if it is your greatest friend, your ability to listen to your penis, your ability to feel your penis, your ability to move with how the body wants to move and be touched and touch others with. And so that's something that men don't want to do. Why, again, they're scared of their power. They're scared of, if I really start to celebrate my desire, if I really start to celebrate my penis and feel him and be with him and listen to him, I might just go and fuck around with everybody. No, you won't. No, you absolutely won't. What you will become, again, is somebody who loves, who's compassionate, who's caring, and who would never do the rapey thing because the body's so intelligent. If you listen. If men, if all they did was listen to their penis, to their body, there would be no rape ever. Ever. Because the body would never allow to do violence. It is our minds that force our bodies to do violent acts. The body's always against it. There's always tension. Whenever we're doing things that are out of alignment with us, there will always be tension. And so when we look at, again, society in the world and so much talk about how all that men want is sex, and then what we have the MeToo movement, and then men rape and they cause sexual abuse. When all of that conversation is so present for men, especially the younger generations, the guys that are growing up and saying, I don't want to do what our forefathers did, they look at all that and they basically reject their sexuality. And in rejecting their sexuality, they pervert their sexuality. So what happens is that while they say, I'm not going to wholeheartedly celebrate my penis and my desire, but I will secretly go into my room when no one knows I'm there and masturbate watching Porn obsess over every ass I see on Instagram and basically be hyper focused on, on sexuality in a very unnatural way because I've rejected the naturalness of who I am as a sexual being. And the other really significant point in this, when a man rejects his connection to his penis, he rejects his connection to his positive pole. Positive pole meaning a place in your body that generates energy. And for a man, that genital area is his place of power. It's where confidence resides, his ability to love and be loved resides, where that validation, that worth decision making resides, authority resides, his leadership skills are there. So as he regularly rejects and neglects his sexual nature in its natural form, he disconnects from feeling that part of his body being energetically connected to that part of the body. He's also rejecting his manhood. He's also disconnecting from all those qualities that make him be a very powerful self loved man. And so it's backwards because guys are growing up and they're like, I want to do the right thing, I want to be the good guy. And by default they're doing it backwards. Because to do the right thing, you need to be a whole human being. You need to embrace every part of you and you need to celebrate your sexuality because your sexual energy is your life force energy. If you resist sex in your body, you resist the power that moves through you and is here to guide you in your life. Yeah, and then, and you know, and then they want to be great lovers. Like I said, all men. I have never met a man that doesn't want to be a fantastic lover. And so they want to be great lovers. But how are you going about it? You know, you take another course where they tell you how fast you need to move a finger rubbing a clitoris. Or do they teach you how to love love with your penis, how to feel your penis, how to blow a woman's world, how to rock her world just with the love emanating from your penis. You know, why are women so exhausted? Why are they so bitchy? Why are they so tired? Because they're under loved. A woman experiences love through her body, through knowing her beauty from the inside out. And the way she experiences her beauty is through physical loving. So if we live in a culture in a world where lovingness, physical love is not something that everybody's experiencing. And mind you, let's be clear here, we could say, because we use the words making love for some porn looking sex, where people are degrading each other. I'm not talking about that. I'M talking about literally loving. The vibration of love through every cell of your being and through the energy that pours through you and out your penis into her insides. That is what I'm speaking about. How it opens up her heart, how it makes her weep and cry, how it makes her feel grief at the experience of. Gosh, it's been so long since I felt myself and life in this way. Something transformative, something that moves in a very, very deep way. And so when we don't have physical love, and this is not just for women, for men, too, this is why society looks this way. Because when a woman is loved physically, she is radiant, she is loving, she is compassionate, she's kind. It's a whole other way of being. And so, again, we look at the world and we can all bitch and complain about why things are the way that they are, and we can blame other people, or we can just look at our little micro world. How do I interact with my own body? That's the starting point. Because I cannot love somebody else with my penis if I don't love my penis, right? So how do I start with my own relationship to my own self and then my relationship to those in my close vicinity? Am I starting with wars or am I bringing peace? Am I an embodiment of love or am I an instigator of chaos?

Yeah. So powerful. Wow. I feel. I feel all of that and so much of the disconnect. And I'm glad you brought up the. The sex part of it, because there's so much shame that's wrapped around that topic. There's so much shame that so many men, me included, held around that for so long purely because of lack of role models, lack of guidance growing up. And the disconnect from that power that you're referring to occurs quite at an early age, at a time, like, for most men, when you're in teenage years and you're looking at porn for the first time, especially if, you know you grew up in a time where there was access to Internet, you're discovering these things, and all of a sudden you're. You're receiving this conditioning or this. This kind of, like, programming around what sex is, what it means, and then an unhealthy relationship, at least, like, I'll speak for myself. Like, how I grew up with an unhealthy relationship, relationship with my penis and watching porn and how sex was this, like, visual stimulus thing that, like, without realizing, I was conditioning myself out of my body so that when I did start to have my first Girlfriend in, like, grade 10 and stuff like that. I'm having sex. I was unable to almost, like, capacitate or to handle the intensity of that energy because I had not practiced being in my body. So it was like I would just ejaculate so super quickly, and then I would have all this shame around that because I'm like, I can't satisfy a woman. Like, what's. What's wrong with me? And there was so much anxiety that I built, like, early on in my sexual journey around that that took me some time to unwire and deprogram. And I say this because I know so many men experience this on. On different levels. Like, there's different aspects of that, but the core of it being the shadow shame, the core of it being not feeling like you can speak about it or like you don't want to talk about it. So where does that process come in for you and your work and how you're supporting men and allowing them to maybe let go of some of the. The tension that has built up around the body from the shame and the story and the disconnect and the lack of embodiment, you could say. And I know we've spoken about the anger tapping into the rage, the primality. I think that's so important. But then what about the shame and this, like, resensitization to the penis and the body? Like, I know that doesn't happen overnight, but where does that begin for you and the work that you do with the men that come into your space?

Well, before I answer your question, I also want to address that, at least for you. And what you had shared in your story is that you went on the side of not being able to handle the intensity and having premature ejaculation, which is one version. And I'd probably say that's even an easier version to deal with because you still have sensitivity. And one thing that I also want to address for people watching this podcast is that a lot of guys, now, another version that they go to because of that conditioning that porn creates for them, especially earlier on in life, is the lack of feeling. So we're speaking about guys that, you know, masturbate to porn, and then they get together in a room with a real live woman, and their penis doesn't even get hard. It doesn't even respond. Or if it does, they can't get themselves to orgasm because they don't feel anything without that really rapid mental stimulation from different angles, looking at different girls, which you can do so easily and fast by having a bunch of tabs open or skipping forward on a video. You get into a room with a real human being and you're like, I don't even know how to feel. Because the only thing that I've ever done is mentally stimulated myself into pretending to feel. So I wanted to address that first because when I was doing this work, I used to have men come to me, of course, for premature ejaculation. But they were like in their 70s, 60s, 50s, then it was 40s, then it was 30s, then it's like guys in their early 20s saying, I have erectile dysfunction. And I'm like, no you don't, you got a feeling problem. And in fact, in all of my years of working with men, with all the men that have ever come to me for erectile dysfunction, I think only one actually had, let's say, a biological issue due to a surgery. Everybody else was having issues feeling, connecting to feeling. So in answer to your question, now it's coming back to feeling. That's going to be the answer for everything. So at the time when, at that time I was doing a lot of private sessions. So I do energy work, body work, to resensitize the body, to clear the body of all those emotions, trauma, everything that we hold in a lifetime. We're talking about everything. We're talking about what somebody said to you when you were five years old and that's still impacting your experience of yourself. We're talking about how you treated your own self, the ways and the patterns that you've created. For example, like in being exposed to porn and what that did over, let's say even 10 years of doing that prior to having a real sexual experience. Because nowadays we're talking about like kids being exposed to porn. You know, everybody can go online and google sex as we do, right? So imagine a little kid that's like, oh, sex, what is that? Let me google it. And then boom, now they're exposed at super young age that I would have never had exposure to and never did at that young of an age. So it's bringing them back into the body and releasing all those feelings they got to feel through them. And recently what I have done in the last few years, I wanted to make this work, be more accessible to people because my private sessions were very expensive and I created an online membership. And so what do we do in this online membership? Membership, energy, work. And something that's really mind boggling for people is that we really are not limited by time and space. And that is the truth of it. And when you study quantum physics, you learn a lot of the science behind how time and space don't exist and how what happens on one side of the world happens to another side of the world. For example, through quantum entanglement. Entanglement. And so in a similar way, when I was doing energy work, I could work with someone's body without physically touching them. And then I thought, if I can do that, why am I limited to being in the room with them? So a lot of my private sessions were also with clients all over the world on the phone. And then I thought, if I can do it like that, why is it limited to one client? So then I started working, working with groups of people. And in my workshops, we do energy work where people can be in full body orgasm with fully dressed, full clothes on, in a room with like 50 other people having these experiences. Really impactful.

Mainly men. Is it mainly men at these workshops, Sasha?

It's about half and half, because now that I opened up the work to women as well. And I love working with mixed groups because they have so much to learn from, from one another. It's wild. Like, men and women seriously think they're like two different species of humans completely foreign to one another. And it's really funny in a way for me to watch just how much in awe they can be with one another when they realize, like, wow, you're really human too. You're having experiences with like I do, and you're insecure like I am, and you love like I do, or whatever it may be, you know, so. But at the time when those eight years, I used to do the same thing, just with men as well. And workshops for men, a lot of deep workshops for men. So then what I realized is that if I could do that with them in the room, is that really limited? No, it's not. And so I created this online membership where we gather four Sundays a month and we explore different themes of all things life. A lot around love, truth and arrows. So the energy work is always using sexual energy to explore things that come up, to clear them, to understand them deeper. Like we're making a community of exceptional lovers for this world that feel, that celebrate their erotic nature and that are committed to love and truth in ways that, to be honest, I don't really get to see out in the regular world. And so they're really simple exercises. Of course, there's an energetic transmission added to the flavor of it. But you are allowed to touch your penis, for example. We may do. I mean, we do some practices that are Dealing with ancestral traumas, childhood stuff. But then we may have a session where I tell them, touch yourself, see what comes up. You know, and people, for the average person listening to this from outside who isn't familiar with my work, they may think like, oh, this is so X rated. And I'm like, it's not X rated at all. Most of the time people are crying because when you start to really feel and get into the deeper layers, communing and being intimate with your body, it's not a sexual horny thing, it's a feeling and healing deep layers of that shame, of the amount of abuse that you have partook in as a giver of it. And also the amount of abuse that you received on the receiving side. And receiving side could look very different on all accounts. But including too friction oriented of sex that was hurtful for your body, even though you allowed it to happen. Blowjobs and hand jobs that were given to you that were too rough for your loving penis, even though you thought you're a strong guy that can handle anything. And so when you start to go into the deeper layers of the body, it is a clearing out process that brings you back to your divinity, to your essence. And with that, we're not just speaking about having a fulfilled life, we're speaking about a life that is in alignment with your spirit. Because that energy that moves through you is your spirit. And so how most of us live is that we choke our spirit. We have tension in our shoulders, we have tension in our groins, we have tension in every part of our body because we're all the time telling ourselves, you cannot do this, you cannot do that, you cannot do this. And all because of some conditioned ideas that you picked up on and are now regurgitated to yourself. And so it's a deconditioning process. But you have to do it with the body. You know, I don't know many men that, and I say this to men all the time. You want to empower yourself. If I can give you one very simple practice that will absolutely change your life. Spend some high quality time with your penis every single day. And what do I mean by that? Touch him lovingly, give him little squeezes, stroke him lovingly, but don't bring in mental images into it. Don't fantasize, be there with him, to feel him, to listen to him, to awaken him, and most importantly, to feel his power, which is your power. Most humans operating these days don't feel powerful in their life and it's pseudo power. You know, you start to make some money as a man, pseudo power. You start to get some muscle, pseudo power. But power is that you are unwavering in who you are. And no one can take that away from you. No one can manipulate how you think, how you feel, who you love. And unfortunately, humans these days are so easy to manipulate. And the whole Covid journey was the biggest scientific experiment and research ever done on how easy it is to manipulate people with fear and with a lack of surety in themselves. The.

Because you mentioned the process in some of the energy work that you do, you're clearing away all the, all the stuff from the past. How do you know? It's probably my intellectual mind, like trying to, like, how do you know it's all gone? Like, and what specifically is happening? Is it like you're just identifying, okay, there's a lot of blockage in the solar plexus area. And then through the energy work that you do, you, you know, that's all cleared out. Like, how does that. Because I know other guys are thinking this too. Like, how does that actually.

I got you.

Yeah.

Okay, so surprise. It'll never all be gone. And, but, but the big chunks that overshadow your life. Well, and so, and I say that because you know how. Honestly, I don't even see the point of being here. If you come back to your perfection as you were born, like, what is the point then? Because I really believe that the journey of life is for growth, for expansion, for learning. And so that's a never ending journey. And the never ending journey is also the never ending process of being more and more and more of who we are by releasing all the different ways that, that we are not and understanding that even though I may have let go of the big chunk of stuff from my conditioning from when I was five years old, I'm still living in this world. And the bombardment is non stop, so it's continuous. However, you will know that things are released by a couple different ways. First of all, you will, you will go through the experience of it. For those people that have ever done plant medicine ceremonies, you know that when you're on a journey, the plant medicine itself will show you what you need to be looking at. It's not like, you know, you're picking and choosing, you're taken on the journey. And so energy work is similar in that when you start to feel and you get in your body, whatever the body needs to release, you will go through it, you will feel through it, you will see it, you will cry it out, you May scream it out, you know, what I call finish the unfinished business of those things. And once they're released, what you'll notice is that situations that used to trigger you don't. Your capacity for being with things exponentially increases your acceptance, your ability to respond versus react. So you literally will see that you are different. Because while the same environment is around you, who you are in that environment will be dramatically different. And you know, you can. You may be able to even do that in hindsight and look back at your life 10 years ago and go, gosh, 10 years ago, if this situation would have happened to me, I would have done xyz. But look at me now. And the difference here is that instead of looking back 10 years, you can go to a pre energy work session to a post energy work session and go, wow, before I started doing this type of work, which could have been a month ago, I was a completely different person. And now the way that I react, move, experience, life is totally different.

Yeah. More importantly for the guys as well is how you connect with women as well. Like when that tension starts to dissolve. Like even just noticed in my own journey over the years, as I was like releasing more and more 10 tension from my body, my sexual experience with my partner was like just, it was, there was more and more energy. I could feel more and more. And, and like you said, that really is the currency. You know, that's like, that's, that's where I'm trying to like measure my success right now, is like, how much am I feeling? How much of life can I feel through me? Because whether we realize it or not, for most, most men, when they realize it or not, that that's the thing that they're chasing, like not the money or the external success is the underlying energy that we expect to feel when we get those things. And what you're sharing is like, as you peel back these layers and open up the, the channels in the body to move through, you realize that everything you want is down there. It's all there already, just trying to come through. So there's obviously the massive benefit of the relationships that come from this work. Like you said at time, the same start of the podcast, like, really, life is really about the quality of our relationships at the end of the day. And I think for so many guys who go through that process of trying to like, fix their marriage or save their relationship, like as soon as they start to look at these aspects of themselves and change their energy or shift out of old energetic patterns that maybe been playing out for years. It's almost like their partner gets to step into something new as well. Do you find that?

Of course. And even with what you had shared, you know, because you do have a partner, you will. You can use her as the perfect barometer for your growth. She is going to be the perfect mirror to show you how your internal world is changing and how you. How she responds to how you speak to her, how she responds to how you even walk into a room and how you sit and how you look at her. Women are so sensitive and that they. They're always reflecting back and letting you know who you are through that reflection. And where you feel it enormously is in the lovemaking. Because women, to be orgasmic, to have orgasms, which is something obviously we know culturally, is not a common thing as it is for men to have an orgasm. Women are much more energetically wired. So she needs you to have energy for her to have the buildup of energy that will bring her to orgasmicness. And so most guys lack energy. They bring their, what I call empty penises, rubbing inside of a woman's vaginal canal. And that rubbing only numbs her out more, and she feels even less. And she thinks she's the problem. And so when a man allows for the fullness of him to run through him, and when I say the fullness again, I'm talking about things that are unrelated to sexual. Because your insecurities from when you were five years old, when somebody told you they don't like your shoes, that's impacting whether your partner has an orgasm. It seems unrelated, but all of this tension, all this constraint, all of your smallness that you make inside of you, everything that you shut down is the blockage of all the gifts that you bring to her to make her blossom into her fullness. So as you open up, as you release the old conditioning, as you release all that repressed emotion, as you start to celebrate your body, your desire, your penis, the fire inside of it, that is what she feels.

Yeah, it's less about because I noticed it. Big thing for guys as well. It's less about like, this act of performance and like, you know, how long you lasted or how hard you were going in sex because of the porn conditioning. And sometimes the best sex can be you're not even moving and you're just, you know, you're just inside of her and you're just there, breathing, present, feeling each other. I think I know so many guys. Don't ignore knowledge that sex can be so simple and so magical without it having to be this performative thing where it's done a certain way based on what we saw through, like, outdated, poor conditioning or like the wrong images.

But think about what you just said, that most guys don't even know how magical they can be without all the performative stuff. So you're actually. What you're describing about how men relate to sex is how they relate to all of life. Because they also don't understand how magical they can be just in being, just in their existence, without the performance, without the money, without the muscles, without the whatever. And I'm not. And I'm not saying there's something wrong with that also, I think that in life, again, we're on a journey. And every journey has its wins and its purpose and its beauty. And so even though I keep using these examples about the muscles and the money, here's the thing. You want to do that. You want to focus on that. Do it. You know why? It will build up your internal muscles in discipline, in willpower, and dedication, in devotion. Might not be toward things that really matter, but at least you're exercising dedication, devotion, willpower, discipline. So then what happens is that once you get to the top, once you get the muscles, once you get the money, and then you're like, wait, I'm still miserable. And you finally redirect all of those qualities to something that does matter. It will actually be easier for you to focus in on that because you will already know how to be disciplined, dedicated, and devotional.

Well said. Yeah, you have to play out the. The journey that you've been. I had this happen to me when I was like 25, 26. I left the corporate world and kind of said, like, money's not going to make me happy. I don't need money. And all this stuff. And I just to want went so all into this spiritual path and the spiritual identity that I pushed all that stuff into the shadow. But it wasn't until, like later in my 20s, I realized, like, I actually need to play some of this stuff out. I still have this calling and this desire to want to build a big business and make lots of money and do all these things. And that's actually okay. It's not bad, or I'm not less spiritual for doing that. And I actually, like you just said, recognize that actually through me pursuing that, I'm developing all of these abilities and attributes that will support me later in life. Maybe when I am 50 or 60 and I can go all in onto my spiritual work because I'm in a different stage of my development and I'm not pursuing things anymore. I can just go deeper into it because I've developed a larger foundation or a more well rounded perspective of the world. And that can only come through pursuing the desire. Would you say if there's a desire to pursue something, it's important to honor that and not like, like put it to the side because that's not what you think you should be.

And you got to also understand that when we're pushed to do something internally, it's for a reason. And there really are significant steps to our journey. And I celebrate all of them. It's not so much about what you do. I always say that it's not what you do, it's the why behind it. You know, somebody else could be waking up at 4am in the morning going to the gym and my advice for them would be like, you know what your homework for now is, you're no longer allowed to go to the gym and somebody else might be doing it and I'll totally celebrate it and someone else is not doing it. And I'm saying you got to wake up at 4 o' clock in the morning and go to the gym because it's the why of why you do things that matters.

Yeah. The energy behind it, the frequency behind it. Find it. Yeah.

And, and you also got to understand that like I, I think that as a man it's really important to understand how the world works for humans in general. But because your audience is a male audience, I'm going to really highlight this especially because men are like leaders, natural born leaders. A woman is going to be the reflection of your leadership. So it's a lot easier for you to guide and to create a direction that the river flows in, for example. Right. So a river needs a strong riverbed and when she has that strong riverbed, she could really flow and play inside of it and do the beauty that she's meant to do. And so it's really important for men to have a good understanding of this 3D world. So him understanding business, taxes, society, like 3D world stuff is really, really essential to be a great leader in his micro community. Even if that micro community community is just him and his partner. It's essential, you know, to know what's going on health wise, to know what's going on emotionally to know, and I'm saying emotionally from the standpoint of if you've got a girl that is all the time binging on reality TV shows that are just not putting her in the right state of Mind, you gotta understand what's going on, going on in the world and be the educator. You know, you've got to uplift those around you. And as a man, you are made to be a leader. And I'm not saying that women can't be leaders. I mean, it's always funny for me because I used to say this all the time while, you know, working with groups of men in one room, where I'm definitely the leader of the men, and yet we're speaking about masculine qualities. And I definitely have a very, very strong masculine in me, but it has to be the healthy masculine, right? And so for the men, if you really focus on your healthy masculine, you also have a very strong feminine in you. And this is where that kindness, compassion, intuition comes in. So going back to the leadership thing is you've got to understand the matrix. You've got to understand this 3D world. You got to understand health. You have to be an example for your family. Even if your family is just you and your girlfriend.

There's something inspiring and different like the message that you're sharing. There's something unique about hearing it from a female's perspective. Like a woman like you pouring into men like this. I said at the start, I think before we started recording that it's. It's kind of rare. It's kind of rare that the. The medium comes through a woman. Like, we see a lot of men pouring into other men, but when it comes through someone like yourself, it kind of hits different. If I'm honest. And I wonder why. Why do you. Why do you think that is? Why do you think sometimes a man needs to be held and supported by a woman in this way compared to another man? And I know it oscillates. There's different times for different things. Like sometimes a man needs that fatherly figure in his life, but then a healthy, embodied feminine energy in his life, he needs that at different times. Would you be able to speak to that?

I don't know. I mean, I think it's interesting for me to hear that it hits different. I would be curious to actually hear more from you in what way you think it's different. And then I'll share, I guess, from my experience, but I never really thought about it much.

I think because for so many guys, me included, like, my mum was amazing. Like, I love. I love my mum. We had a. I wouldn't say we had a great relationship growing up, but she was a great mum. But she was never really. She never really understood me emotional. She never really Understood what my needs were back there beyond just the physical. And she was never able to pour into me in ways that I really needed growing up, which resulted in me. Like, I had a great, great relationship with women in my life, but I didn't have the best relationship with my emotions. So I wonder. I think it comes back to that, like, not a lot of men had great female role models in the. In their life that embodied these healthy qualities, like you're alluding to. Whereas, like, this devotional feminine energy. When a man receives that, it's. It's so nourishing. Like, I get it from my. My girlfriend right now when we're dating. Like, when she pours into me in these ways, it's so rejuvenating because it's. It's like a different quality. It's like we. We like, we work hard, we do all these hard things. But then there's something about coming home to a woman that knows how to pour into your. Say the right, right things or touch you in the right way, or just turn the environment, make the environment look really beautiful. There's something that does to the male nervous system that I think that's what I'm picking up on is, like, when you cross paths with another woman who's like, embodying that, it's just like, it's nice. It's nice to be around that.

Well, I'm glad I asked you, because it was. It's definitely a different direction than I was gonna speak on, so I'll turn it to that into the. A moment. But I feel that the beauty of us as men and women is that we complement one another so graciously. And in our society, you know, most of what we see is that we're at odds of one with one another. It's like divide and conquer, right? Intentionally placed in society. But what we're for is to compliment. And this is why, you know, even the conversations I see on social media where they ask women, like, what do you bring to the table? It's a very weird question and a very weird conversation. But the point is, is that we complement so the same way that you can do things that I really want, struggle with as a woman that don't come naturally for me. The same way that there are things that are really nourishing to you that are natural to me. And so that type of, as you say, affection, that lovingness, that pouring into a man in this beautiful feminine way that is so easy for women to do is the gift and the compliment and things that are this is why I'm saying it's important for men to understand the 3D world. Things that are much easier for men to do, which is be focused on this 3D reality, while women are way more connected to the spiritual realm. That's where you get to compliment her. And she will look at you with awe and wonder and just go, oh, thank God a man is around and he actually knows how to speak to my accountant. You know, like we're talking about some really simple, basic things, but it's so, so nourishing. And, and when you say it's beautiful to come across that, it's because we rarely have men around that understand their role and how to really gift what comes naturally to them to others and vice versa. Right. So when I say it's really natural for a woman to pour into a man and be affectionate and be loving with him, how many women do we see that, that actually support their man versus bring him down or criticize or ridicule, you know? And again, it's this divide and conquer. And my remedy for that genuinely is learning how to make love, literally. Because if that man and woman, if you're in a couple with a partner, I don't care if you're a man or a woman, and you understand how to make love in an energetic way, that love making becomes medicine for you, that love making becomes a healing modality for each of you individually and together as a partnership. And when I say healing modality, I'm speaking about a healing modality for you physically, so even your physical ailments can be resolved. That pain that those autoimmune diseases, emotionally, mentally, depression, anxiety, things like that, and also even spiritual expansion happens in that. So love making, when done as it should be by nature, becomes a powerhouse for bringing men more connected to their essential nature, women to more connected to their essential nature. And the gift of healing that happens between the two of them. And because this does not exist in this world, what we see is a continuation of frustration, pain, imbalances on all levels. And that's how. What we see in partnerships as well.

Wow, I love that. So like prioritizing the lovemaking as the primary healing modality in the relationship. Yes.

And so one is prioritizing it, but two is knowing how to do it. Because just because you're, excuse my language, fucking twice a day every day does not mean it's going to bring those qualities to your partnership into your individual life. It could actually do the opposite. So we're speaking about learning how to make love. And Tell me, in which men's empowerment group? Maybe yours, I don't know. But overall, let's just even exclude yours. Out. But overall, out in the society, where do you see men gathered to understand how to make love? Where do you. I don't know anybody prior to coming across the work that I'm doing that knows how to make love, period.

What I love. I love this, by the way. I love this. What about if. Because sometimes in a relationship, it's. There's. There's usually one of. One of the persons in the relationship is going deeper into this kind of development or this kind of work or this kind of expression. What if the man is the one doing this work or stepping deeper into this, but he's finding that his partner is resisting? He wants to have more love like he wants to. They want to have more sex. He wants to have more sex with her, but she's maybe too inner masculine or she's carrying things from the past, or she's withdrawing or closing up in intimacy. What are, what's your general advice for men in those situations around how he can best support his partner in deepening into relaxing, into surrendering into his leadership?

Send them her my videos. That's one. And I'm also saying that to be honest, usually it's in reverse. Usually it's women asking me that question. And I just say like, so send him to my website, show him some stuff, let him peek around by himself and spark his own interest in something different. It will speak to an internal desire that instead of making him or her feel like there's something wrong with her or him in the way that she has sex, but go, oh, wow, maybe there's something more that we can experience and then it creates an appetite for that. However, from the male side, if you're the one that is more interested, that's actually a very easy situation to deal with. It's quite different. It's very different being a female trying to get a male partner on board. It's very different being a male trying to get a female partner on board. And again, we look at polarity. You are output by name, nature. She is input by nature. Even if you look at the bodies, right? If you look at our physical bodies, insects, she's a receptacle. She receives, you enter, so you give. The woman receives. Naturally in partnerships, by nature, the dynamic where the man is expanding and the woman's on his side, it's actually a very natural place to be because as he expands, it's a lot easier for her to Receive whatever is being given to then be uplifted at the same time in sex. Even easier because of what I just described. So you're the one doing the sex. You get to set the tone. You get to set the pace. You're the one giving it. You're the one doing it. Truly, as a man. Unless you, of course, have that girl that jumps on top of you and says, no, I'm going to do you, which is a whole other conversation and story. But overall, you're the doer and she is the reflector and the receiver of what's being done. So if you want to, for example, be more essential, be more slow, take more time. Time. It's just as simple as saying, just relax, let me enjoy you. I really want to take my time today. You don't have to do anything. You just relax, breathe, and let me enjoy you. Do you know how much of a relief that is for most women to hear? Especially when they've also been conditioned with Hollywood and porn? For them, it's like, really, for the first time ever, I get to do nothing. And. And then comes the but I have numbness and I don't feel anything and I'm broken and I'm not orgasmic and I'm not pretty enough and I have cellulite on my butt. Like, then comes all those layers. Your presence and your lovingness. And you, the energy coming off your penis. Remember how we talked about that? Understanding how to make energetic love will be the healing modality for all that insecurity, all of the trauma, all of the pain and everything that she's holding inside. And you do. Like, if you have not cried in sex, you don't know sex. And this is true for men and women because if you've never had sex that touched you deep enough for you to get watery in your eyes, at the least, then you've never actually made love. You might have gotten off, you may have had friction, something came out of your penis, but that's not physical love. That's just gymnastics with an ending. So as a man, it's actually very easy to set that tone. It's. Sometimes I. I wish I was a man because I'd be a fantastic lover.

Being a man's great. I love it.

But being a woman is an exceptionally delicious experience. But it's an art form because as a woman, trying to get a man to do, to make change, it's a completely different journey and can be quite a frustrating journey. Journey. To be honest, could you speak a.

Little bit more to that because, yeah, it's water.

It's water wearing down a stone versus, you know, the opposite effect. And so what I mean by that is that a woman is very, very, let's say, effective in her grace, in her receptivity, and in her softness, but it takes time because men can be very stubborn. Very. It's, you know, we look at these qualities of the masculine and the feminine, and they can be very healthy, but they can be very unhealthy. And so, like, I think of somebody that I have been with who is an exceptional strong man, super strong willpower, super determined, can move mountains if he wants to make something happen. But if he doesn't want to make something happen, you're up against all that stubbornness, all that willpower, and all that unwavering action. Right. So it's. It's quite a journey to be what I would call, like a beautiful seductress. And I don't mean it in the way that, you know, Instagram posts show. I'm speaking about being such a loving light that seduces somebody out of a place of ego to a place of love. And hopefully, hopefully, that is what women would be using these powers and skill sets for. But it's a much more. It's a very different journey because, of course, it depends on the kind of man you're with. Some men will bend over backwards for anything. But if you're looking at a man of intelligence and power, they oftentimes have qualities that are exceptionally beautiful if they're going in the right direction and very problematic if they're unwilling to move those qualities in the right direction. However, when it comes to sex from a female perspective, it can also be done because everything I had just shared with you was not about sex. It was about, you know, life, habits, changes, quality of work that they're in, like talking about relational stuff. In sex, women can definitely set the tone, but it's a. It's also quite the art form because she does it through her body, through her sounds, through her expression. That's how she leads where for a man, it's very direct.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I love. I love that you shared that, by the way, because I know there was a lot of women that I see commenting, dating, Dming me and like, oh, how do I help my man step into this? Or like, they're sending the videos to their man, like, how do I get him to start doing this? And it's like, ah, well, you know, it's one of those things. It's like there's an Element of, like you said, that seductorous quality where you're in. You're trying to inspire the man rather than tell the man. Like, when a man's being told what to do, it just triggers this. It's probably like that mother wound that comes up where you want to do the opposite when someone's telling you what to do. But if you can find a way to inspire him to want to step into something, it's a completely different quality. It's totally different. So I think that would be the challenge for the women if they are listening to this.

Well, let me give some points to the women. For one, it has to be indirect. So for the women, as I said before, I'll usually say if they found something that they found to be interesting, like a video or something online, to just very casually share it with our partner, not be on top of him all the time saying, did you watch it? What do you think? But just to kind of share things, to seed his mind with another way of seeing reality, whatever her interests are. And oh, gosh.

I feel you with this one. I feel you with this. With this one.

I'll. I'll leave it. I'll leave it at that for now.

Okay. Because it's great. It's. Again, it's great hearing it from a female perspective because, like, I'm always so careful with when I speak to women online or when I'm speaking about supporting women online because there's just so much, like, ideas or things that, like, that can get in the way of someone hearing the message or hearing it tent behind the message. So I get that.

Okay, I'll give one more. I'll give one. Men all want to be heroes. They don't want to feel like there's something wrong with them. Their mothers all the time told them that everything that they did was not right. They all try to be good boys now they're growing up. They want to be a man. But what they are good at is being a hero, and they love being a hero. So when you approach a man, instead of going to him and saying, I really don't like how you do this in sex and I really want you to do this instead, that is just like you said, the old mother wound. There's something wrong with me that doesn't work out well. And you also have to consider as a woman that if he listens to you, you will not be satisfied because you want the man in him to show up and treat you differently versus be a little boy. That just follows mama's advice. But what they are good at is wanting to be heroes. So if you go to your man and you say, you know, I really find that I struggle with myself when we're making love. I have a hard time connecting when we're going too fast. I feel more numb when this is happening. When you speak like that, he's already sitting there thinking, how do I be the hero in helping change the situation? Situation. So rather than pointing out to, this is what you're doing wrong and what you should be doing different if you come to them from a place of vulnerability, again, this is that grace, this is the seductress, this is the indirectness, the receptive nature of the woman, that if you come in and it's not lying, it's being honest because you're honest to say, hey, when I just noticed that I have a hard time connecting with my body to feel anything when we move too fast, I just realized that I really need things slow because I struggle with myself. I struggle with tapping into my emotions. I struggle with feeling beautiful in this kind of situation. And that is the inspiration that the man needs to say, I want to be her hero. And then I will make the changes.

Nailed it. And going back to what was spoken at the start of this podcast, which for both of us, all the men that we connect with have the purest hearts and want to have, they want to be better. That's like, something that I fundamentally know to be true about men is like, they're all trying to be better in some level. They want to be better in business. They want to better in their health. They want to be better in their relationship. And, like, that's the alley oop for the guy to be like, okay, like, how can I be better at this? But when it's delivered incorrectly or it comes through incorrectly from the woman, it does the opposite effect. It's like punishment. You're like, oh, like, fuck. Well, maybe I'm failing. I'm doing something wrong. What's the point? So I really love that. I really loved how you just articulated that because it's something really practical that women can take away from this.

And I want to go back now. It's reminding me of how I didn't address what you asked me of, why it may land different when a woman gives this information. I think that that judgment that men have around, I don't want to be the rapey guy. I don't want to be the angry guy. You know, all of that is because they don't want to scare women they want to be a good guy for women. They want to do the right thing. And so I think that also from what I've experienced working with men, is that for them to hear a woman say, like, tap into your anger, you need to do that. And I'm not scared of it, you know? And yes, love your penis, love your desire, connect with that is giving them permission in a way that they never have heard before. And the fact that it's coming from a woman who they've been trying to protect from all of these things, you know, I'm a representation of woman. So the fact that they've been trying to protect women from that. And then a woman comes out and says, like, I'm not scared of your anger and I actually really need you to love your penis. Like I love your penis. I need you to love your penis and I need you to celebrate how much you desire to love me with your penis. Then it's like a whole world opens up to them 100%.

Yeah. Yeah. It's just nuts. It's not. It's nuts that how absent or how deficient men, how deficient men feel in their lives around not having those spaces where they have permission. It's like not having permission to go there or to feel something or to express something. Like I actually think that's, that's a big part of this is like a man is listening to this right now, going like, I feel like I have permission to bring more of me, to open up more of me.

But I'm also telling you that when you start to connect to your sex, all the other places where you haven't been giving yourself permission to do anything, whatever that is, they will fall off without you even realizing. Meaning the natural power and confidence and self love that you build and expand upon by loving your sex, by loving your desire, by loving your penis and your body in a connected way. The level of all of those qualities expands so much that all the other stuff literally just dissipates you. It's like, I could be scared to do XYZ because I feel insecure about xyz, but if my insecurities stop being there and now I'm confident that I'm a good person. Now I'm confident that I am worthy. Now I'm confident that I don't need validation because. Because I fucking rock, then all these other things that I wasn't giving myself permission to do are non existent. Because I know that when I speak my truth, they're coming from a place of somebody that loves and cares. So a lot of these things that we don't give ourselves permission to do is because we don't give the polluted version of ourselves to do them. We say, I don't want to say that because the stuff I'm carrying, it may seep through and I don't want to go there. If I try to take a step forward in this direction, all that insecurity is going to be ignited. I don't want to go there. So we don't give ourselves permission because of all the shit that we're carrying. When you start to cultivate that relationship with your genitals and you start to feel through and release all that other stuff that you've been carrying in your mind, body, you now become yourself. You become who you really are. And who you are is a divine, powerful, loving, kind, intelligent leader. And that leader does not worry about a conversation or about a project or about any step he takes because he is fully empowered and supported by life in ways that you cannot imagine. When you live in alignment with yourself, you are supported by life but like no other and doubt dissipates. All these things that most humans worry about are just what 5 year olds, not 5, 10 year olds worry about. I think at 5 we're still quite free.

It's true. Yeah. And that, that authenticity when it comes through is what people feel we can feel. I think like as the energy and the planet goes up and up and up, we're becoming more and more sensitive when someone's accessing all more of themselves. You know, I think I would assume women really feel that the most too. They know, they know when they interact with a man who's gone to those depths and confronted these aspects of himself because her nervous system feels safe, she feels safe around a man like that. And as you step more into it, you're just, just attract more and more people who are on that frequency. And I think that's the beautiful part, that for the people who are maybe feeling a little bit alone or they don't have their community, haven't found that person yet. Like just know that as you go deeper into everything we've been talking about today, they come to you, you don't have to go to them.

And when you as a man physically love a woman and you see how women respond to you, that is also a level of kingship that you do not have access to alone about yourself. It is like an upgrade that takes your experience of yourself to a whole other level. And some men go through their whole life without ever Getting there again, due to lack of understanding, lack of connecting to sex. Just a miseducation of what sex is about. It is so like, I. I know we're talking about some very general ideas here because obviously when we get to the conversation of having sex, there's got to be an understanding of the mechanics, how the bodies work, how they connect together, how to feel. Like so much of my work I remember I always use this as an example. But the very first workshop that I was doing for men, I was so excited. I had my notes with me, I had my whole curriculum. I was like, this workshop is going to be awesome. And after starting the workshop, I just tossed the papers out and started improvising the whole thing. And the reason why was because this workshop was supposed to be how to be a great love. And I had all these things that I wanted to share. And then I get in the room with these guys and I'm like, we're down to the basics. I cannot teach you any technique if you don't know how to feel. So we got to get back to feeling. And so my work for 18 plus years now has all been about teaching humans how to feel and all the different ways and avenues and fun ways. You know, it's. It's not just, oh, feel. It's like, give yourself a massage to your penis, but feel it. I don't know many men that have actually done that as a practice. It'll blow your mind. And what will probably blow your mind first is all of the unhappy, unbeautiful feelings that you will feel at the start. Your own judgment of yourself, your boredom. I don't feel anything. This is stupid. That might be the shock first. And so if that is how you feel, how do you think a woman feels interacting with you?

So true. So true. And you can also say a good measure as well as the level of feeling capabilities for a man is when he is massaging his penis and holding himself. Does he get a wreck from that? Does he need to make images or create fantasy in his mind to get a wreck? Or can he connect with the sensuality of himself just through his own physical touch, without images in the mind?

Exactly. And that practice is so powerful that practice alone, if for the men watching this, if all you did was that for 15 minutes a day, every day, it will change your life. It will change every aspect of your life. Even if you don't find this part of your life to be significant. And right now you're really focused on money, let's say it will change how you make money and how much of it you make. I'm telling you, if you don't believe me, try it and prove me wrong.

Every guy's like, all right, done. We're doing it, we're doing it, let's go. Like, I, I definitely haven't done that as consistently as I feel like I would like to. And you've inspired me because it is such an important practice of self connection that gets overlooked. That very much gets overlooked because it needs to be like the breath work or the meditation or the yoga or this like, specific movement practice of. What if it was something, something as intimate as that.

Yeah, guys like to punish themselves. They'd rather do for 15 minutes a day than lovingly touch your penis.

I know. Or do the hydrox workout and be absolutely exhausted and just, you know, just have, like the, the, you know, shallow sex. Yeah. You've actually shared a lot of really practical things in a podcast where it's. We're obviously talking about a lot of, of high level concepts and, you know, understandings that. I feel like you've made it really granular and practical for the guys on here as well. So, yeah, you're really awesome. The work that you do is really special and I just want to, I guess, reflect that to you. And on behalf of all the men that are maybe listening to, just like, thank you for the content that you put out, the message that you're sharing. It's so, so needed and got a lot of gratitude for you, Sasha. So thank you for the work you do. It's been a real joy. Just connecting.

Thank you very much. It's definitely a very sweet place in my heart to work with men and this work is just so precious. It's so needed. It's needed for humans to be more loving with men one another, but it literally will change the world. And from a micro place, it's like, I mean, guys, you're. You really are magical, you know, and you have so much to offer and you're scavenging for little details, trying to find worth and value without realizing the beauty, just the beauty of who you are as men. And it's our society. Society doesn't celebrate that beauty. It celebrates masculine beauty through your achievements, but not through who you are and just in the energy that you carry. And it's so needed. It's so needed and it's so beautiful. And I celebrate all the men that you work with, Jordan, because I can feel you got such a beautiful heart. And like you said that the guys got beautiful hearts is a reflection of their leadership.

Thank you.

Congratulations.

Appreciate that. Yeah, this won't be the last time that we have conversations like this and won't be the last time I'll be seeing you. But where can people watching or listening learn more about your workshops coming up, the community that you've got going online and all the things.

So I stopped offering private sessions to the general public. So I know I'm kind of retired from that after the many thousands of hours of working. I do still work with high net worth individuals. That's something really important because I also work with people that are dealing with severe trauma and people in high positions have been through some serious stuff. So I still make myself available for that and for the general public. I have my online membership, which is amazing. And talk about a loving community of men and women. Oh my gosh. Absolutely recommend that. And I also have a couple of workshops for men and women together that are coming up. I have one, one in October. I have one in November there. I think there's like one ticket left for October and some tickets left for November for the workshops. And they can find all that on my website.

And what's your website?

Sashacobride.com Perfect.

Perfect. Well, I'll put all those links in the description for this episode, but thank you again, my friend. So, so great. And I thoroughly enjoyed where we went today in this conversation.

Likewise. Thanks, Jordan.