SSP 077: Weekly Lesson - How To Change Your Identity

Hey, what's going on, guys? It's Jordan Kanlis here, speaker, coach and founder of State Shifters, and you're listening to the State Shifters Podcast, the show designed to help conscious achievers master their internal state and break free from the limiting patterns that are keeping them stuck. So you can live a life of passion, purpose and freedom. And on this podcast, you're going to receive everything you need to evolve physically, emotionally, spiritually. And you're going to be getting the tools, the strategies, the live coaching interviews, all, all from conscious creators who are also living their purpose and leaving their mark on the world. And really, it's my belief that we're all capable of greatness. And once we have the courage to own our pain and learn the lessons from our past, we can create a future built around our purpose. And my intention with this show is to really give you the resources you need to help to tap into your unique soul mission and really live life from a beautiful state of being. So. So with that being said, if you want more resources, tool support on your journey, then feel free to go to state-shifters.com I have a few, few free workbooks and webinars and videos you can check out. If you want to join my free Facebook community, you can click the link in the show description. And if you're interested in getting help from me or some mentoring, if you want to accelerate your evolution and move beyond these limiting patterns that are holding you back from living your soul's purpose, then send me an email jordanate-shifters.com or go to state-shifters.com work with me and we can tee up a call. Other than that, enjoy today's episode.

Welcome to the State Shifters Podcast, a show dedicated to helping you discover your true potential through connecting the mind, body and soul. What's going on, guys? Doing a quick live on here because I wanted to share some thoughts and insights with you around identity. And that's what titled Today is Live. And the reason I wanted to talk about identity is because identity is really shaping everything. Everything that's happening in your life is shaped by the identity that you've sculpted for yourself. Now, the reason why I'm talking about identity is because in a lot of the conversations and coaching work that I do with people, I get the first opportunity to see someone's identity through the language that they use. So language is shaping your identity all the time. The words in which you choose to use is putting you in a box, which is sometimes confining you or restricting you to what you can achieve and what you can do so through any transformational work. It's firstly about asking the question, what is it that you want to create? Meaning, what is it that you want to bring into the world? Then secondly, who do you need to become to create that? So the second question is all identity. Now I want to tell you guys a little story. And before I became a full time coach, I was living in Toronto, making minimum wage. And there was this time in my life where I decided, hey, I want to make some more money, I want to start a business. You know, I want to be, I want to become an entrepreneur. And at the time I was pretty much broken, have much money. Living in Toronto was an expensive city. And I remember buying into this course to become an entrepreneur like this, this online business. I bought into this online business and when I started that course, there was the portion on sales, it wasn't sales and was like having enrollment conversations with people. And when I started having, going through the curriculum of this course, I've realized that there was a gap between where I was in that moment and where I wanted to be, which is to have an online business make a certain amount of income. But here I was not making very much money starting out on my journey. There was a massive gap between where I was in that moment and where I wanted to be. And this chasm, this bridge that we often got across to get to the person we want to be is where all the transformation happens. But unfortunately, this is where most people stop in their journey. Because what happens when you go out and try to become this new person, but you haven't embodied that shift yet, there's this sort of like imposter syndrome that shows up. That's why we, you know, when you first step into say a sales job and you've never had a sales conversation before, it can be very intimidating. It feels very scary. You're talking about large sums of money, but you haven't embodied as the person who's worthy of that money. So all these limiting beliefs come up when we start to shift out of who we used to be to become someone new. So this like transformation process is so crucial because once you get clarity on who you need to become, the next process is about how can you let go of who you used to be. This is so huge. I want to emphasize the importance of that. Once you know who you want to become, how do you now let go of who you used to be? Because right now it's so important that you get crystal clear on who do I need to become to thrive at the other side of this crisis that we're all going through. Who do I need to become so that, you know, in the new world, I'm positioned in a way where I can be of impact and service so I can provide for my family, whatever that may be. The identity that we've had up until now is now no longer going to serve us in the new world. So the recreation process, the transformational process is really beginning in this moment when you start to decide, I want to become a new person, what are the daily things that I need to start to do so that I can shape a new way of being? And notice how those daily things come in. Very small little things you do day to day start to shift your being. Your identity shifts from someone who's lazy to someone who's disciplined, someone who's scared, to someone who's courageous. So you're noticing what you need to shift in little day to day actions. And when you first start out, this is going to be challenging, it's going to be difficult. Sort of imagine the analogy of like a car's broken down on the road and you start to try to push your car. The initial push is tough. To get the car going is hard. Like it takes a lot of work, takes a lot of effort. But once the car is moving, you've got some momentum and once the car is moving, you start to move a little faster. It's the exact same for your identity shift. The initial effort is going to require some discomfort, it's going to require some real strength and courage to adopt a new way of being. But once it gets going, you've got momentum. Momentum is such a powerful thing in your life once you can create it. So my invitation, I guess with this live, if you're tuning in and you're getting some insights from this, is start to think about what is a new identity that you want to create for yourself. Start to think about the kinds of language that you want to use, the words that you want to use to sculpt this new identity. And then start to think about what a small little things that you can do day to day that are going to start to initiate or cultivate this new version of you. I see this a lot with people who come to me and they're experiencing anxiety or they have a lot of thoughts in their head and they can't slow down their mind. I used to be someone who had a lot of like anxiety, you know, going through university. Just like my mind was full of information, I sometimes couldn't control my mind it was just out. It was rampant. And it would cause causes, anxiety attacks and exams. I remember it was. It was terrible. And I remember one day I had a. I had an anxiety attack in an exam, and it crippled me. I couldn't finish my exam. And I was like, I'm done. I'm done with this. I'm done with my mind just taking it, taking control of me. I'm done with not being able to just, like, be calm and relaxed and be at peace. So in that moment, I decided I no longer wanted to be an anxious person. I was done with that. So the shift. The shift happened when I started to look at, okay, who are the people who are in control of their mind, who are at peace, who are connected, who are calm, who are centered and grounded? What do these people do? Well, most of them, if not all of them, had some form of mindfulness and meditation practice. I didn't have one, so. So, okay, cool. It's time for me to start learning how to meditate and managing my mind. Back to the car analogy. Starting meditation for the first time is like trying to push a car that's broken down the side of the road. The first time, it's fucking hard. You sit down in your meditation, go, damn, this. This shit ain't easy. My mind's crazy. And right there is where we come up against the resistance. We're trying to let go of an old way of being, to become a new person, someone who's more calm and more peace. So we trust in the fact, in the knowing that through consistent daily actions, we start to create the momentum. And when it comes to meditation, the more you do it, the better you get at it. And then all of a sudden, three years later, I'm now an experienced meditator. My mom. I'm in control of my mind. I haven't had an anxiety attack in over two years. So you start to figure out that you can change and shift. You can become anyone you want if you're prepared to put in the small daily actions. Now, I really see no limit as to what you can achieve, given the fact that if you can have clarity on who you need to become to achieve that. So as an example right now, next stage of me is I want to start to become someone who's so tuned into their body that I don't have to think. I just feel decision making becomes effortless. And I've crossed paths with some people who live like this, you know, I've crossed paths with people who are living so in alignment with their truth. That they're not afraid to say no to things, they're not afraid to let go of all the things that no longer serve them in life. So I started to look at, okay, what are these people doing? What type of identity have they built and what kinds of habits did they instill to allow that to happen? And I noticed that most of them don't do very much. The things that they do are only in the highest alignment and things that serve them in that moment. So what I started doing, I started doing way less in my business. I do way less when I'm not doing something. I'm prioritizing being. I'm just sitting out in nature, I'm walking. I'm not always feeding my mind with information. This was a very difficult, this has been a difficult process for me because I. My old way was to always fill my mind with information, always be doing things and always been trying to grow. I prioritize doing over being. I'm flipping that now. So wherever you're at in your journey, think about what do I want to achieve and who do I need to become to achieve that? And then reverse engineer the becoming process to daily little habits. If your mind is racing and you're anxious and you're never at peace with yourself and you want to become someone who's more at peace, start by looking at what can I do today that's going to support that? Meditation is a great thing. If you're not, if you're not a meditator, then, and you have an excuse that says, I can't do, it's too hard. Well, you gave up at the point where you reach the resistance, where you're trying to break through the old you. If you stick with the process, your car will get moving, you start to get momentum. So I want to emphasize that, that you can become anything you want if you're prepared to just develop some discipline to stick with new habits and be very mindful of your language. Language that we use is really shaping who we're becoming. So thanks for joining me, whoever was on here and if there's any insights you took from what I've just shared, feel free to send me a dm. I'd love to hear from you. Most importantly, send me a DM as to what you're going to take action on because that's, that's where it's at. You know, I'm all about using social media for consuming positive content, but it's not enough to just consume the content and not actually do anything with it. So consume the content. If you're consuming my content, amazing. It's an honor and pleasure to have you here. But implement it. Do something with it. Take action. So with that action, momentum starts. Guys, thank you for joining me. Take care. Hey, there we have it.

Guys. Thanks so much for listening to this episode. And yeah, look, if you made it this far, cool. Here's my voice again in your ear and I'm gonna make one more request for you is go ahead and subscribe and leave a comment on the podcast page because I'm really putting a lot of focus and attention on getting this podcast out to more people because I know what I'm putting in here can serve and bring value to people and it would mean a lot if you got value from this to leave some feedback and subscrib you stay up to date with what's coming up and as always, follow me on Instagram and love hearing from you. It's at stateshifters until the next episode. Guys, thank you so much and I appreciate you.