SSP-171: I've Coached 2,000+ Men - Here's the ONE Thing All Winners Have in Common

All right, what's going on, my friends? Today's video is going to be about the mindset and the frequency of winners. Now, winner is someone who gets things done that they desire to have. They receive what they desire to have. They set a goal and they achieve it. And in the world of duality, winners and losers, there is a lot fewer winners than they are losers. That's because of the things I'm about to share with you today and because if it was easy to win, everyone would be winning, right? And the only difference between winners and losers is a frequency. It's a vibration. And after coaching over 2000 people, at this point in my journey, I've just noticed similarities between the guys I work with who are making millions of dollars in their business, and success seems effortless to them, and the guys who are struggling. The guys are struggling to make money and can't seem to be consistent in how they show up. Now, it's twofold, right? There's a mindset that's going on back here in people who are successful. This mindset that I'm constantly trying to step into in my own life, be in health and business and relationships and finances. And then there's also a frequency that comes along with that, this magnetizing quality that often rich people or successful athletes or celebrities have. They owned a level of internal greatness that is felt. And that's the reason why successful people often become more successful. Because there's a compounding effect. Once you've embodied that frequency, you start to walk around knowing what you're capable of. So the challenge is, as you're coming up, or how do you maintain that, or if you're trying to step into that, how do you start to acclimate to this new level? If you're looking to achieve success in your life, success could be the relationship. It could be deepening your relationship, it could be starting a business, expanding your business, whatever it might be, just put it into context of your situation right now and then take on board what I'm about to share here. Now, this comes back off the experience that I've taken from traveling the world, scaling my coaching business to six figures, plus being in a 10 year relationship with my girlfriend Amanda, that just seems to keep getting better every single day and living and having some of the best people in my life that I do business with. And I believe that I've attracted that. I know that I've attracted that because of the shift in beliefs that perpetuated or allowed a shift in frequency over a period of time. Now the first shift in belief that I had to take on board when I was shifting out of my corporate job. Now I worked as an accountant for two years in Australia at Deloitte and I did not feel successful at that time, even though on paper I had what you could call was traditional success, a great job, a career path, making good money. But it wasn't successful because it wasn't. I wasn't feeling confident in what I was doing. I wasn't feeling like I was owning the life that I was here to live. So you could say there's a frequency around that. Are you actually on track or are you actually pursuing your highest calling in life right now, in this moment, in this day, moment to moment, on a micro level, what are the things that you're doing? Like rank the. Rank them out of 10, the little things, and you're going to start to get a bit of an understanding of like how true are you to yourself? Because that frequency is what's determining success. It's the conviction that you have on what you're doing, which comes back down to the truth, that you're embodying the trust that you have in your own ability to say something and achieve something. Now that comes back down to again, what you choose, the beliefs you choose to uphold. Now one of the beliefs that I see many successful people have that a lot of the people that don't, aren't successful or fail don't have, is when time gets tough, when you're being challenged, when you're being stretched and when you think, fuck, I don't know if I can do this, I don't know if this is it or maybe I need to go back and go back to my safe zone because things are getting a little bit overwhelming right now. Successful people have a belief that the stretch, the tension, the edge, the uncomfortability is where the growth is. They have that belief, it's programmed into them. They don't even have to think about it, they know it. When I'm at the edge, when I'm in the tension, when I'm about to give up, that's the growth, that's the time for me to lean in, that's the time for me to go even harder. I noticed this from the people that I coach. When I stretch them, I put them under the test, under the pump, the guys who want it, they show up, they keep showing up, they keep taking action even when they doubt themselves. The ones who don't, they just, man, I don't know, I don't know. If this is for me, I don't know if this is the right path for me. I'm gonna have to just go back to my comfort model, comfort bubble, whatever that looks like. So observe that in yourself. Is that a belief you uphold when things are uncomfortable, when you're being stretched? Do you see it as growth? Do you see it as expansion? Do you see it as you're not quite capable, you need to take a break into rest? Okay. Very common. And the more you start to see yourself as someone who's capable of handing, handling tension, right, Your nervous system's capacity starts to expand. You can hold more energy, less things overwhelming, you get stressed less. It takes more to stress you, right? Your tolerance to stress goes up. And if you think back to, like, professional athletes or someone who's playing on a large scale, your tolerance to stress has to go to a certain level where you could handle a certain amount of pressure because you're no longer affected. You're no longer affected by the external result. You're no longer affected by the outcome. Because you know deep down who you are. And when you know deep down who you're just playing. And this is another shift in belief, my friend. Successful people know on a deep core internal level who they are. And they don't need validation from something outside of them. They don't need to be told that they're good enough. They don't need to be praised, although that stuff's nice. They've developed the ability to validate themselves. They've developed the ability to know their worth. And it's a whole different ball game. When you're going out into the field, you're going onto the sales meeting, or maybe you're going onto the stage. When you don't need anyone's validation, when you don't care what people think about you. That's an undeniable frequency. When someone has that, when someone embodies that in their art or their craft or their sport, what we see in those people is the ability to get creative and play and express that is different to everyone else. That is unique. And how do you get to that place where some people were blessed with dads or moms, which gave them the unconditional love that reinforced their gifts and reinforced their expression. But a lot of people didn't have that. So some people had to work hard to refine or build that mindset, to build and sculpt their internal heartset, to understand or connect so deeply with themselves that they know how to regulate, they know how to transcend the Fear that often comes up when you don't have a good game or when you don't get the deal closed, because that's inevitable. Part of the come up is the failures. So it's actually the same thing with the stretch that I said before. The new edge that you stretch into. It's actually how you respond to the failures too. Successful people know that failures are the time to go deeper, to connect deeper, to remember that none of it actually matters. To let go of the pressure that they put on themselves. See, so much of optimal performance is around letting go of pressure. There can be immense amount of external pressure, but if you don't have any internal pressure, you're free. So it's all an internal game at the end of the day. And the internal pressure will come down to the unconscious thoughts and conditionings and stories that you tell yourself about why you need to perform in a certain way, or the impact or the risks of not performing in a certain way. If you can start to reframe those stories and see every performance just the opportunity to play. Now play is the main reason why we get into business while we get into sport, while we are playing music and art and also in a relationship. We're just playing with the possibilities of interacting with another human being and just see what gets birthed from that. The moment you need something from your sport or your, your business or your relationship, the moment you need something from it, you are attached to it. And therefore you are not operating from the frequency of success. You're operating from the frequency of doubt and lack. And this happens on a subconscious level. I remember growing up, for me playing semi professional soccer back in Australia. I could feel my dad's pressure. I, as a result started to put a lot of pressure on myself. I could feel the pressure from my teammates and then I could feel the pressure from wanting to be liked by my team names. And I would associate my likability with my performance on the field and the lovability from my dad. So you can imagine how much pressure I'm putting myself on the game when I'm going out only playing in front of 500,000 people. Not even I'm like fucking trying to get the perfect routine. I'm trying to prep perfectly for the game. I'm trying to get all my free game rituals perfect. Because I didn't like the idea of failing or playing bad. I could actually I was attached to playing good. I needed to play good. I bet you can imagine what that means is, although I did play good most of the time, the times that I didn't play good, it would be really challenging. I would struggle. Or if I had a few bad in the first 10 minutes of the game, if I had a few bad touches or gave the ball away, my confidence would dip very quickly because my confidence was very fragile. My confidence was based on external things, external performance. Now the shift that you get to make if you're stepping into a new level of optimal performance is make your confidence connected to your internal abilities to honor your word, to follow through on the things that you say for yourself, not anyone else. The things that you say for yourself make your confidence that because if you've shown up consistently in a practice, or you've shown up consistently in a certain routine or ritual, or you've shown up consistently as some sort of activity that you've given to yourself and you follow through on it, then let your confidence come from the self trust that you have in yourself. Your own integrity, your own integrity is determining your confidence. That one sink in. Because integrity comes when no one's watching. When you're saying something to yourself like, yeah, I'm going to get up and meditate today, or I'm going to get up early and go to that gym class and get up early and go down the park and practice kicking the ball around, you don't do it like there's a little hit to your internal confidence that no one else really sees. So come back to that. What are the things you know you should be doing? What are the things you know you shouldn't be doing? Then you just turn those shoulds into musts and get in. Just, just don't negotiate with the things, the new standards you need to set in your life for how you choose to operate and then watch the mind come up. When you choose to evolve beyond the old self, the mind's going to come up and want to doubt you and pull you back down and the uncomfortability. But then you're going to know that the frequency of success embraces every difficulty and challenge and sees it as you evolving and expanding. So where the mindset, the habits, the frequency, the consistency, the discipline standards, the integrity, the trust and the conviction, which all of this culminates in a certain magnetic field that you start to operate from. And when you bring together a team of people operating from this magnetic field of coherence, where their heart and body are in sync, where they're putting out a certain frequency of flow,.1 Hz, immeasurable frequency, you can look it up. When a team of people operate from this place, they become unstoppable. And in the game of sport, where really or in the game of business, in the game of relationship, it's just electromagnetic fields operating against magnetic fields. And the result, or the currency or the success or the scoreboard will flow to the path of least resistance. The path of least resistance will be the individual, the team, at the higher frequency. Okay, so take this and apply it into whatever your life you're in right now. Applying. Applying it to business. Mainly because when I look at the business that I'm operating in and the business I've stepped into as a partner at the supplement company called Peak Human, we look at the team and go, where are the energetic kinks right now? Where are the people on the team who are not operating from coherence? Where are they not in flow? Where is there not love and playfulness coming in their actions? Because remember the moment there's attachment, doubt, neediness, they are operating from fear. And it will lower the frequency of the team and slow down the result from happening that will actually block the inflow of the things that we desire. On the sporting field, it's the exact same. And you know this, right? You have your best games and you almost don't care. We don't give a fuck about the result. You're just out there playing. You want to win, but you're there playing because it's all about the enjoyment of the expression of who you could be and what you could become on that field, on that pitch, on the court, whatever it might be. But the moment you're too attached to a result, that's when you stop having fun. That's when it's. The game comes too serious and you go in. In those times, you get to step back and look at what's. What am I choosing to believe right now that's causing me to feel this tension or the seriousness in my body? What do I get to give myself to let go of that, to relax and to come back into my fullness? And very often it'll be in the solar plexus that the blockage will be, the solar plexus or the anxiety or the pressure. And underneath it is usually some sort of shame. The shame connected to childhood experiences where maybe you were told off or shut down or abused on some level for not getting a result. And then you attach the result with love. And then the opportunity for you is now, as an adult, can you practice giving yourself that love so you no longer need it from anything outside of you? That's the, you know, that's the practicality of what I'm sharing here. You only got to give yourself that love when you're able to spend time with yourself. To get to know all these underlying patterns and how they play out, you need to practice expanding your awareness. That's why having a coach is so crucial. Because a coach can help you expand that awareness and see these unconscious dynamics that may be blocking your fullest expression because you're holding on to fear. So the coach or the accountability component can come in the form of an individual holding space for you once a week. It can come in the form of your team getting some level of guidance. You have obviously have a performance coach for your skill, but do you have a coach for your emotionality, your heart set, your soul set, your mindset? Okay, you need to have both skill up level energy and emotional up level. You combine that through accountability and guidance and success will be unstoppable. If you're looking for some level of coaching support like that, on that level, just click the link in the description of this video and you can look at the men's group. And the one to one coaching that I offer doesn't have to be with me. It could be with anyone. But I'm saying if you want to go to this next level, get some level of accountability where you're guided and someone is shining a light on the things you can't see. So hope you got some value from the video today, my friend. I look forward to seeing you on the next one and get out there and be consistent. But success will be inevitable. Let's get it.