040 6 Tips to Enhance Your RELATIONSHIP and HEALTH with Dr. Jesse Chappus and Marni Wasserman

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Welcome to the Earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author. Each week I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul and get focused and clear. Clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves. Get ready to earn, own and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go. Welcome back to the Earn your happy podcast. And today we have the pleasure of not just one guest, but two guests. So I had the honor of being on their podcast, which is called the ultimate health podcast. So my first guest's name is Dr. Jesse Chappas. He is a chiropractor and a holistic health coach and he truly is a lifelong learner and he is always researching the most current information on nutrition and health. And we also have Marnie Wasserman and she, she is a culinary nutritionist, health strategist, and author and owner of Toronto's first plant based cooking studio. So we had an incredible conversation and you're going to learn all about their tips and tricks of being the healthiest, happiest couple that they can be. So let's get started. Jessi and Marnie, I'm so excited to have you on the show. Thank you so much for coming on.

We're so excited to be here.

It's our pleasure. Lori, we're excited.

You know, I had the honor and pleasure of being on your podcast, the ultimate health podcast, and I just really enjoyed our conversation. And one of my favorite things is that on top of you guys being amazing and brilliant is that you work together. And I think that's absolutely amazing, especially with, you know, I think the way that people view relationships nowadays and especially, especially working together. Like, I just cannot wait to dive in to how you guys do that. But before we do that, I want everybody to get to know you a little bit better. So, Marni, do you mind starting and just letting us know a little bit about your background and how you got into doing what you're doing now?

Sure, yeah. Well, my background is really in the health and a little bit of fitness world. I've always been fascinated with food and the body and how that all worked together. So I was a nutritionist and then I went to culinary school. And then I started teaching cooking classes. So I have my own cooking studio in Toronto where I teach predominantly plant based cooking classes, all whole foods based, inspiring people how to make healthy meals at home that's easy to take on and show their families and make meals for themselves. And it's just been. It's been a wonderful journey because I really live and breathe who I am, what I do. So it just goes right into my business. And I've had the pleasure of writing two books, Fermenting for Dummies and Plant Based Diet for Dummies. And that's just rolled right into everything that I do as well.

Oh, I love that. And right away we're going to put that in the show notes. But I need to know, what's your favorite plant based recipe?

Anything with sweet potatoes.

Oh, my gosh, me too. We made that sweet potato fries with truffle oil on it.

Oh, so good. So good. Yeah, I'm a big believer in whole foods, plant based, you know, incorporating that into whatever your diet is. My diet's constantly evolving too. We might get into that later on, but plant based foods is the core. Lots of greens, so anything with greens as well.

Oh, I love that. Okay, beautiful. And Jesse, tell me about yourself.

Sure. Well, my training started back in university. I was in kinesiology, and that led into chiropractic. So I'm trained as a chiropractor. And actually just a couple months ago, I made the leap and left my chiropractic practice after four and a half years. And now you mentioned the ultimate health podcast. Marnie and I are doing that twice a week now. We're putting out two shows a week, so that's my full time gig. So I'm kind of in a transition period right now. And, yeah, just loving it. I mean, I'm really into this podcasting thing and our show's really taken off, so that's. That's become my gig.

Oh, I love this. Okay, so obviously there's. You guys are both really living into your passions right now, but clearly there's a path that gets us here and there's so many things that we're not showing, so. And as far as you guys meeting, I want to hear how you met and clearly you didn't have a lack of things to talk about. But how, when, where, how long have you guys been together?

All right, well, Jesse and I both being in the health world, we are both obviously online. So there was some time ago Jesse had reached out to me to connect with him on his blog and I had written a piece for his blog, so that started that connection. A little bit later in time, when things had changed in my personal life and I was onto a new relationship, I was looking for a partner. I was looking for someone who was on the same page as me and looking for what that next step might look like. I remembered Jesse Chappas, who had reached out to me, and he just seemed like a sweet, nice boy. However, the problem was he lived four hours away from me. But at the time, that wasn't the biggest deal because I was just looking to slowly get back into things. And I had reached out to him on Facebook. He was a marathon runner at the time, and I was into running some marathons at the time, too. And I figured that was a perfect in. And I said, next time you're in Toronto, let's maybe go for a run. And that starts. Started the ball rolling, started us talking, hanging out periodically. You know, we went from two times a week, sorry, every two weeks, to every weekend, to it rolling into a relationship. And three years later, here we are.

Oh, see, it's so beautiful because I think so many people are wondering how you meet somebody, where you meet somebody, and it's so clear that, you know, if you really want to meet somebody, it's. It's like, what do you love to do? And really search in that genre, in that area and really reach out with those people. And the worst thing that could happen is if you guys would not have obviously wanted to date, you'd have a friend who you could run with. Because we know we need a running partner for all of those miles that you log, especially if you're marathoning. Right. So that's really, really beautiful. So I want to get into how you guys started working, working together, because that is, like a huge undertaking is you guys aren't married yet. You've been together, you said three years, but I think you said you started this podcast two years ago. Is that right?

Yeah, it's coming up on Two Years here in September.

Okay, amazing. So what was that conversation like?

Well, it just so happens about a year before we started our podcast. I've always been into podcasts, listening and just consuming them on my runs and on long car rides. I just think it's such a fantastic medium. So about a year before we started ours, I collaborated with another health expert, and we did a weekly show called Health Talk Podcast. That show no longer exists. It's not in itunes anymore. But that show, all the preparation, learning how everything works behind the scenes, gave me a platform for when Marnie and I were ready to take the whole the Ultimate Health Podcast and really get that going. So I had the knowledge, I had the passion for it, and it was just, I think in the beginning, actually, it took a little bit of time to convince Marnie because she's a busy entrepreneur and has a lot going on. So I kind of planted the seeds for a few months, and when the time was right, we just went for it. And when we went for it, we went all in. And we did one show a week up until just a few weeks ago, and we've recently upped it to two shows a week. So that's kind of the origin story there.

Okay, so when you guys. When you were trying to convince Marnie. So this is one of the things is, you know, it seems like a lot of people who have podcasts are all, it's already busy people. Right. But what was that thing that made you leap, Marnie?

Well, I think just slowly getting Marnie into the medium, and when we're on car rides and stuff like that, just putting on some of my favorite podcasts and her seeing the power of the medium, and I just think it is just such a powerful medium because you can be doing something else at the same time as you're consuming the material. So I think Marnie just needed a little bit. It wasn't something on her radar so much, so it's just giving her that little bit of exposure and. And she was sold.

Awesome. So what is the goal for the podcast? Why? You know, I know that when I was sitting down to think of, was this worth it? What do I want out of this? What do I, you know, what are the things that I think are going to come of this? What were some of your goals?

Well, in the beginning, it was just fun. It was just Marnie and I, over the years have accumulated so much knowledge on health and wellness, and we just wanted to share it. It just feels like almost a waste having it bottled up and just shared between the two of us. So I think a big part of it was just having the itch to get that information out there. And for me, I would say the other enticing aspect was connecting with all these other amazing health leaders such as yourself, such as Dr. Mark Hyman, Gretchen Rubin. We've just been able to connect with all these people in the health world that have had such an impact on my health and well being. And for me, it just sounded like a lot of fun to be able to have these conversations each and every week. So yeah, that would be mine.

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So cool, because you guys said you just followed what was fun, and it was fun for both of you. I mean, I guarantee it was probably already conversations that you guys were having, and that's kind of what I want people to see is conversations that you're already having. Could this be content for people? And if you love sharing, why not share the conversations, right? There's so many beautiful things that couples could do together. So what are those things you love connecting over? So I think that's so cool that you guys are podcasting together. So this brings me to the conversation of boundaries. Did you guys have to learn how to talk to each other? Did you guys have to learn how to communicate on the podcast? Do you ever do that silent argue thing that me and my husband do where, like, you hit at each other and you're, like, yelling at each other to either be quiet or like, it's your turn, or you go, oh, my gosh.

We're still figuring that out. But we do have our own little sign language that we do during the shows. There's lots of rolling eyes, like someone's saying something or pointing. But at the same time, we have managed 104 episodes in to really figure out our flow. And we always get people asking, how do you know who's going to say what? Or how do you know what's going to come next? So we've figured out a rhythm, and luckily it's. It's worked pretty well in terms of that communication. But it is a whole other art to be able to communicate behind the scenes and not knowing what's coming next.

And it just comes. And you have to be willing to just work through whatever comes up. Because I can only imagine after, what did you say, 104 episodes, what things come up during that. Because we work from home, and it's kind of like we're always just figuring it out and then figuring it out together. What does that look like to have to figure it out together? Do you have to really understand each other's languages? Do you ever have to step back and just who's the most likely to forgive first?

Jesse, for sure. He's always the more forgiving one. So, yeah, I guess big things are. If something's going a little bit over the topic, it's either gone on too long or one of us wants to chime in. Those would be big things. Or who's gonna speak next? Maybe both of us have something to say at the same time. We both wanna answer it. Or a conversation's going a certain way and then maybe Jesse's talking and I'm like, oh, I've got something really juicy to add. Then the conversation goes a totally different way and that's lost, it's gone. I can go back to it and I have. You have to figure out that art of bringing in that tasteful way of bringing it forward. But I find that that's always something. And then that's where the rolling eyes comes in. It's like, oh, man, I didn't get a chance to say that.

I love that you're saying that because there is so much letting go that has to happen when any relationship works, right? Because when that comes up, this is just such an interesting thing to kind of play off of. Because when a topic comes up that you are just so passionate about, you feel like you could say something that could really shift a lot of people and you just feel it in your heart. And all of a sudden it's gone. And you know it's gone. And there's so much of ego that could come in to say, bring it back to that, but you know that it's over. And he's constantly doing the same thing, right? Like when he knows his is gone, it's gone. And then you just. It's like letting go in that moment. So it's a really beautiful dance. I can only imagine what you guys are doing just cause Chris and I do calls all the time as well. So I can only imagine with twice a week how often that is coming up. So do you guys have an art of arguing? Because I think some people think that amazing couples do not argue. But I often think that sometimes arguments can be really beautiful and clearing.

How do you feel about that interesting conversation to have here? You know, we definitely. Jesse and I have. We're both pretty opinionated people with very different perspectives. You know, there's a lot of yin and yang between us. So in art, not sure, but there are certain things. Jesse's very black and white and very methodical and very thorough, whereas I'm more kind of you know, artsy, and I'll kind of take things a different way. So sometimes the odd time will clash on that. But for the most part, we both know what we bring to the conversation, and I think we've respected that. And it's good because it comes in handy when there are certain things that need to be said or done, and the argument needs to go that way or the conversation needs to go that way.

I love that because I think that there is. I think there's ways that we learn how to speak to each other. And like you said, you understand certain things about him and he understands certain things about you. And really, I think that when we can respect and appreciate those things, that's when we can. Instead of getting frustrated or, like, you know, this is how I feel about this, or that's how I feel about it, you can. We can really start to respect it and understand it. So. So when did you guys decide that this was it? You wanted to really do this together? You wanted to make it big, you want to work together? And what did that look like for you when you ultimately decided this was something that you guys wanted to pursue and keep this podcast going together?

Well, I think it was about 50 episodes in before we brought on our show sponsor, and that's when things started to get a little bit more serious. So at this point, we have one show sponsor, and we do a little advertisement at the beginning of each and every show. So that's kind of when it became a business and not just a hobby. And, yeah, right now, we have all kinds of ideas. I'm sure you with your business. We've talked to a lot of friends. We have a lot of friends that are entrepreneurs and are doing similar things. And we just have these lists now of ideas, or I wouldn't call them to do lists, more like idealists. So we're constantly adding to that and plucking from that. And, yeah, since 50 episodes, we've really treated it more like a business.

Wow.

Okay, 50 episodes in, I want people to hear that, that no matter what you're doing in the beginning, it is going to be a commitment, because it's not like, oh, you know, 10 episodes we were having this blast, and it was great and whatnot. It's truly a commitment when you want anything to see. So I love that you guys decided, no matter what comes up, no matter what you're doing, that this is what you wanted to do. Did you ever have moments where you guys were like, no, this is not working for us.

I don't Think so. I think we've been pretty committed, and we realized because we've been in this online health world for quite a while, that things don't happen overnight.

Can I get an amen?

We were patient and we realized that it would be at least 50 episodes before we really got to a spot, till we really got to a spot where sponsors would be interested and until we really got some good momentum behind us.

Oh, that's amazing. So, you guys, I really want to get into your six pillars of health, because as I was reading them, I also think these are so vital to be in a healthy relationship. So let's talk about that. You have six pillars of health. What are they?

All right, so let's dig deep into the first one, which is nutrition, which is my world. You know, it's all about whole foods, real food. I think we can all agree on that. The more clean we eat, the more from nature and the earth we eat, the better. No matter what the diet philosophy is, it's gotta be whole, right? So Jesse and I are really big on fermented foods. We're big on our greens. We're big on a plant based diet as the core. And we do do a little bit of animal protein from eggs and fish and chicken, of course, has to be the good quality stuff. And as well as just having fun with different foods too, and experimenting different recipes, for me, being a chef, you know, it's all about bringing in different flavors, different herbs, spices, having creativity with the meals all the way from breakfast to lunch to dinner. And, you know, this is the core. So we really try and emphasize good quality nutrition. And then there's the next layer, of course, which is kind of the superfoods and super herbs. These are things you can kind of get into. But once the foundation of whole foods is there.

Have you guys always eaten healthy?

I mean, I would say for me, it's been eight to 10 years. It's been quite a while now. So I can remember growing up and being exposed and consuming a lot of the typical stuff, the standard American diet or Canadian diet, things like soda and chips. So I've been through the whole mix, but for me, it did naturally come early on, for whatever reason, that eating quality food is of the utmost importance.

What made you realize that? What were the differences in feelings? And why was that so clear?

I mean, to be honest, it might have been things in the beginning, because now that I think of it, I think it was probably more like 15 years. So back when I'm in my teens, and probably for More superficial reasons, such as having small breakouts and some oily skin and just being a healthy weight and looking good. So I think, like a lot of people, it was probably more the superficial things that brought me in right in the beginning.

It's funny because we can be lured in with that, which is great, right? We need some sort of motivation. I always call that the great bait and switch because you don't realize how good it can really be, especially when we start eating really, really well. So for you guys out there who are listening, I just think the reward on the other side. What are some of your biggest rewards, do you think, in life from eating healthy foods?

For me, the first one that pops in my mind is energy and just having that clean burning fuel in your body all the time. You just have a natural energy and a high for life that I think a lot of people are missing out on. So that one's. That one's huge.

But how do we make it past that really difficult hump? Let's say, because I'm from the Midwest, you guys, I grew up like, oh, man. I mean, if it came from a box or a can, I was eating it. And just really rich foods. We bonded over food. My mom was a fantastic cook, and it was. It was really tough for me to get over those humps of, like, you know, the first two weeks or three weeks or month or two months, however long that takes to make a habit, because it's. You know, foods are one of the most addicting thing in the world, and we can't quit it. We have to eat it. So how do you make it over that hump? What. What's your mindset? And do you have. Do you guys have any tips?

Yeah, tips for people who have a challenge. Transitioning from a diet that could be the standard American diet or out of a box, is to find the alternatives that are most closely related, whatever that might be, and making it easy, as opposed to saying, hey, Lori, don't eat those cookies. Here's an apple. It's like, hey, Lori, here's a recipe for awesome cookies made with buckwheat flour and dark chocolate chips and maple syrup. Find that similar thing. That's going to be a way easier transition for someone. It's like, okay, I can still have my cookies. And I found that working with my clients, this has been a really much more approachable transition to eating healthier once they realize that healthy food doesn't have this dry, stale aftertaste and this connotation of things taking too long or being so alternative it becomes tangible and real and that's why I do what I do. And that's why cooking classes is such a beautiful medium because people get to experience that and see it and then take that home.

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That's so beautiful. Because in the beginning, people think that they have to quit everything, right? And. And if we don't have joy coming from other places, that's like saying, okay, thank you for pulling all of my joy from my life, because food is my only reward or, you know, thing that brings me pleasure right now. And truly, what ends up happening is when you. When you still have the cookies, but make them organic or healthy or clean or really beautiful, great ingredients, your body does start to respond differently. You don't crave them like that other stuff. It's not like, oh, my God, these are crazy crack. Like, you actually feel fulfilled, complete. You're like, I'm good. I had those cookies and I'm full. So can you explain what that is to people? Why just swapping out those ingredients for the real thing makes such a big difference?

Because it's meeting them where they're at. People feel safe. It's not this intimidating, scary thing to change over the diet. You want people to feel responsible, take control of their health, and feel like it's something they can do. And then hopefully the goal is that as their palate changes, they're gonna start to crave the healthier stuff. Then the greens, then the apple and the fruit as a snack will start to come because they'll just feel better. They'll lose that kind of crazy sugar craving. We can get into all that of that spike and what that does to the body all day long. But once they start to open up their mind, and really it is mindfulness, once they're connected there, it's one thing to know that they want to eat well because they want to lose weight, but if their mind's connected with their body and they're like, you know what? This is not just for me to lose the weight or whatever their goal is. It's to actually feel good and to actually put my dollars into something that's actually good and sustainable and not junky, and it becomes a whole lifestyle shift.

Awesome.

And I think I just want to add a little bit to that, too. A big thing to keep in mind is being slow and steady with this. These changes, they take years. And even for Marnie and I, we're constantly evolving, and we're okay with that it's not about an overnight switch, it's about starting small, adding things in. And Marnie and I find the best way to make that transition is by slowly adding the things in that are good and healthy and that taste good and that resonate for that person, and they're going to naturally push out the bad stuff. So instead of saying, I can't have this anymore, it's like, no, you're going to have this instead. And you can start by making small upgrades. I think we're in a really beautiful time right now in the 21st century where you can go to some of these healthier grocery stores, like Whole Foods, and they have. There's a lot of crap out there. I want to put that caveat in there before I keep going. But there is a lot of great healthy things that you can buy or ingredients you can buy to make things, like Marnie said before, that are going to really resonate with your body, give you that energy, and they're not going to take away from your health. They're going to add to it.

Awesome. So addition versus subtraction. And I love that you said that, like, maybe, maybe go browse the aisles of a whole Foods or a grocery store that's, you know, that you love. That's all natural, and see what piques your curiosity and start, you know, looking there. It's fun. It can be a fun journey to finding what you like and how your body responds to different things. So I love that. So as far as nutrition in relationships, because we're gonna bring it back there, I know for me, I have to really eat well and healthy in order to feel good. And this actually comes to my relationship because if I have a Saturday date with my husband and we started out, we don't do this anymore because I learned quickly if we started out with, like, pancakes and waffles and something sugary and maybe a mocha or something like I used to do when I was younger, I really get cranky and I don't enjoy the rest of my day. And you know what? When I don't love myself or feel good, it's hard for me to think that he is amazing. I'm just being really honest. So I think nutrition plays such a big factor in how we respond to each other and how we feel. What do you guys think about that? Do you find that in your relationship as well that it's really important for you?

100%? Everything that you eat affects your mind, your body, how you're feeling, and if you're not Feeling good about yourself or if you're bloated, you're not going to respond to the world very well and certainly not your partner. It's amazing. Especially as females, we're very in tune with our body, and it really does come into play. And it's crazy to say that that everything we eat or how we're feeling or the way the jeans fit, it all comes together. And I think when you are eating cleaner and better and you're feeling good about what you're eating, and especially if you're doing it together, it can have profound effects on yourself and, of course, your relationship.

Jesse, do you notice that, too?

Yeah. And I think it's just so important to both be on the same page and to push each other with the food. So getting up together and depending on the day, if it's on a weekend and you have a date that night, maybe taking the time to make a nice, healthy breakfast together and starting the day off that way, and both being on the same page with eating healthy each and every meal. It's just for Marnie and I that we're lucky because we met through the health world, so we've always had that in common. But if you can get your partner on board and slowly start making meals together, that's just been really a profound thing for upping our relationship and taking it to the next level.

Mm. I love it. So, you guys, I love what you had said before this to both of you about bringing in other foods. Because for me, I had to have that conversation with my husband. Like, he used to be this big breakfast guy. He used to love to do that. And for me, that was, like, my worst nightmare because it ruined my whole day. So now we kind of have this compromise of, okay, well, and now it's totally different. We've been together, like, you know, oh, my gosh, probably going on 14 years total, 10 years married. But it's about, he can still have that breakfast, right? He can still have those pancakes or those waffles or whatever he wants, but let's go somewhere organic. Like, let's eat really, really good food. And even him now, like, he doesn't want to do that. But that's how things started switching. It was first making those choices of not taking it away and being like, now we're gonna eat egg whites and spinach for, like, he would kill me. So really being realistic with what that person wants. And like you guys had said before, adding in those new, whole, amazing foods for your body. Okay, so let's move into number Two, hydration.

Okay. So hydration often neglected. Having a good, good source of clean drinking water is the utmost importance. So for Marnie and I, we've kind of tested and dabbled in different types of water over the years, and there's, there's so many different types of filtration, and it can get really complex. But what Marnie and I have come to over the years is that reverse osmosis is great. And if you can. And you can actually go out to springs. So these are actual places out in nature where water is naturally coming from the ground. This has become a big part of what Marnie and I will do on weekends. So we'll fill up our glass bottles, we'll go into nature, and we'll actually harvest our own spring water. So you obviously need to make sure that water has been tested, and there's different meters and different ways of doing that. But basically, I just want to throw to people that spring water, that's the gold standard if you can find a good quality spring near you. And we can get into how you could find one of those, if you're interested. But having reverse osmosis water at home, just having that clean, filtered water is just so important.

So tell me about this. You just have on here adding a pinch of sea salt, squeeze of lemon to tea. So tell me about that. What is that for?

So with RO water, the only downfall is that everything is stripped out of it so often in drinking that. That's the water I have at my food studio where I do my cooking classes. And when I'm drinking that all the time, you. They sometimes feel a little bit dehydrated. So adding in the sea salt and some lemon juice as the upgrade to give it a little bit more minerals, it makes you feel more hydrated is a nice way to just add a bit of zip to that water. Or you can always add like a chlorophyll tincture or powder. Just a way to reconstitute that. Because RO is just so depleted, it kills everything. So you're left with almost dead water, essentially.

Okay, so how do I know if. If I'm not hydrated? And how much water should I know to drink?

I mean, a lot of people out there say half your body weight in pounds, in ounces, that's kind of the number that the nutrition world goes by. But I think it really depends on how much exercise you're doing time of the year, how dry it is outside. And you really just have to play with it and get a feel over time. I Would say having a water bottle beside you that you can sip on throughout the day as you get thirsty is a great starting point. So having a stainless steel or a glass water bottle and just having, like we talked about, maybe a little squirt of lemon or a pinch of sea salt in there and just determining as you get thirsty, having that right there. So there's no excuses. I found that's been a real life changer for Marnie and I and for a lot of the people that we coach.

I love it. I'm, you know, I'm super motivated by thinking about what hydration does for me because honestly, some days I'm like, I feel like I'm a camel. Like, I drink so much water and thank God I work at home because so much water means so many times going to the bathroom. And you're like, this can actually get annoying. But I'm super motivated by the idea of what hydration does to keep on drinking water. I'm like, oh, you know what? My brain works so much better when this happens. Oh, my appetite is so, so much less. Oh, I know my workout is going to be so much better having this water. And so what are some of the main things that hydration does for you guys that maybe you're motivated by?

Yeah, and I just want to say most people are chronically dehydrated. So. And that this brings into your question where if you have a headache, you're feeling tired, your skin performing, you know, your workout or your talk or whatever you're doing, often it's like, look at how much water you've had that day or how much coffee did you have on the other side, how much are you dehydrating yourself? So when you're putting that good quality water in or some kind of herbal beverage, or it's an herbal tea or coconut water, something that's hydrating you, you will feel good. And you don't want to get to the point where you're thirsty. As Jesse said, keep the water bottle beside you. Don't get crazy and be like, oh, I've hit my eight cups a day. I'm good to. Don't do that. Really go by how you're feeling and is your mouth dry and are you feeling a bit off? But what we hope you take away from this is that you can actually start to pay a little bit more attention to, are you drinking enough? And it's often one that even I can say, sometimes I'm like, oh, my gosh, did I actually have enough water today? This is My world, I coach people on this. Did I have enough water today?

Oh, yeah. I'm totally guilty. Especially you guys podcasting. Like, you can lock yourself in your little room, and then you're like, wait a minute, there's no water around me. Yeah, but there's this cup of coffee. But, yeah, I love that. So, you guys, if anything else, just to feel better, and it's huge for me for an appetite suppressant. Huge, huge, Huge. A lot of times when I'm really hungry, I notice that it's just because I have not had enough water. And for me, it shows up first thing as hunger. Well, just about everything does, but. But that's really big for me. So let's move into number three, exercise.

Okay, so exercise, obviously, very important. And for Marty and I, we're really into doing functional movements, high intensity exercise. And, yeah, we like to basically get out in nature and do a lot of these functional movements at the park when we're out and about, or we take a couple days a week and we go to the gym and we have a little bit more structure. So we're kind of on the page right now where we have a little bit of balance of both. But for us, definitely the high intensity stuff mixed in with those functional movements. And, yeah, it's just creating the balance between the cardio and the resistance training.

That's awesome. And what do you think exercise does for your relationship?

Well, since we do a lot of our working out together, that's a great bonding experience. It's something that we can both do. We can push each other a little bit to go a little bit longer, and it's a nice way. Everyone says have a partner when you work out. It really does keep you motivated. And when we're working out and we're feeling good about our bodies and our health, it just helps the relationship. Right. It all comes back to the same thing. We were talking about nutrition. When the body's feeling good and, you know, especially summertime right now, we might be pushing a little bit harder and we're outside a little bit more. It feels good. So it feels. It just allows us to be more present with each other and feel good about ourselves and then find new things to do together, too, which is nice. As Jesse said, we do a lot of things outside, so bike riding is something we love to do together. And taking long walks, you know, walking is really big for us right now. We have a Fitbit, so we're big on tracking our steps. And so it's just a fun, you know, little Tool that we can use, which ultimately helps the relationship too.

Okay. Do you think you guys could be with each other if one did not work out?

If one did not work out. Wow. I just don't see that happening. But yeah, I think we would definitely need to both be working out to be feeling good about ourselves, to be able to contribute to being a great partner in the relationship.

My husband and I have this talk all the time that, you know, obviously if something terrible happened, I would still somehow get him out with me. Just because it is such a. It's such a way to bond, it's such a way to feel good. It's such a way to get out into nature. Right. I mean, so much of what you do to exercise. And I know sometimes it's tough with the seasons, but. But it's about getting into nature. So how much of exercise for you is also therapeutic and spiritual?

Yeah, I mean, for us, we do yoga and that's kind of an on again, off again thing. And that obviously has a spiritual basis to it as well. And just for our, well being, our mental well being and being connected and being in the present moment, I just find that exercising really brings me back to the present and allows me to be my best. So that's, that's definitely important.

Oh, I think that's huge. I love that you just said that it brings you back to the present. Because so often, you know, I think especially women and of course men too, but we can get so caught up in what we're thinking or our day or what we have to do, and it's like a reset. Right? Like you both go to the gym and whatever could be happening that morning kind of like gets erased. Have you guys noticed that?

Yeah. I mean, if you go to the gym together or if you go for a long walk, we say this every time. You always come back feeling better. No matter what level you're at, when you leave, you're always going to be at that next level. So it's just something to keep in mind. Even though during those challenging times, if there's some kind of stress in the relationship or somebody's just going through a stressful day, it can be harder to get out of the house. But just knowing from past experience how good you're going to feel when you come back, you just need, hopefully in that time it can be your partner to give you that little bit of a nudge and get you out the door.

So do you guys ever use walks as like therapy or if you need to work through something?

Ah, That's a great question. We love to just go for walks, and we do do a lot of our good conversations and planning and talking things out on them. But have we used it as a therapy session? I don't think so, but stuff definitely comes up when we're going for long walks. It's for sure a chance for us to just kind of comment, reflect, bring up our sides to things, and go a little bit more forward on deeper thoughts.

No, I think that's totally. That's exactly what I'm talking about. Go ahead, Jesse. Sorry.

I was just gonna say there's something about, for me, at least, when I start moving my body that a lot of times people talk about having ideas when they're in the shower in the morning. For me, when I'm on a walk, it's so fascinating how many different ideas or different ways of looking at things come up. So I think it's a great habit for couples who are trying to work through something to get out, go for that walk together, and it can be as little as 10 minutes, but it's going to make all the difference.

Oh, my gosh, yes. I hope you guys all heard that. Same with me, Jessie, literally move. And I'm sure with you, too, Marnie. Moving gives me ideas. I. I feel like I'm able to communicate better with Chris, my husband. I feel like we are able to work through different things that are going on in our lives or just business things. You know, him and I work together. I think movement really does move energy around in your body and in your mind. I swear to you, if I had to just sit on a chair all day, I would literally be like the most boring, dumb human, because I'm like, I gotta go move. I, like, need to go get some ideas, get inspired, and get out in nature. So I love that you do that, too. And I find that some of our favorite couples have the exact same theory. It's like, let's go work out, let's go walk. Let's make sure, you know, it's my own responsibility to make sure that I'm happy. It's not, you know, you don't have to make me happy. So let's move into the next one sleep. Because I am such an advocate for sleep.

So are we. It's, you know, not only come up so many times on our podcast with different guests, but Jesse and I, it's. It's always been a core of something we want to tackle and tackle better. And I'd say over the last three years, we've made it even more of a priority. Jesse's always been more of the Nighthawk. I always kind of had a really relatively decent bedtime, but the quality of sleep is really where it comes in. So we're always trying to revamp our sleeping situation for making sure that we're luckily I do have a beautiful organic mattress and good quality sheets, so that's easy. Keeping the room dark and then really committing to that bedtime, which is something we are still working on. Full disclosure, we're still working on life and everything gets in the way and you get caught up on emails, on your phone, on Instagram, whatever it might be. And when we do commit to that time, whether it's before 11 and we catch that window, that beautiful window where you wake up feeling rested, it makes such a difference versus those nights where we go past the midnight mark closer to one o' clock and it is the worst. You feel like you drank when you didn't even drink and it's terrible. It's terrible. And with all the research coming forward now with how profound sleep is on your health, on your well being, on your mental focus on your body, everything, it's just so important. It's such an well now it's getting a lot of attention but it's overall a lot of people underrate the value.

Of sleep beautiful if it's the one thing people can change. I'm always like looking at people's sleep for appetite, for everything, for just their mood, everything how they feel. Do you have any resources that you can send people to that will put in the show notes for sleep that you love?

I would say that we're going to have actually Arianna Huffington coming on her podcast and we just got a hold of her book the Sleep Revolution and digging into that, into some of the interviews she's been putting out lately. I really fascinating and just puts it into perspective again and again which for sleep for me it's one of those things where I got to keep hearing it again and again because even when I do feel like I'm getting on track, it's so easy to derail. And I think for me it's one of those things where and for a lot of people too, I'm sure it's a passive act so you feel like you're not really doing anything. And in today's modern society where we're go go, go and rewarded for all the output we're producing each and every day, it's just, it's a 180 from that. So I Think it's. It's just putting. Putting in perspective and fueling that difference, because even one good night's sleep will affect your energy level. And. Yeah, it's just you have to really treat it like a treat. And if both of you are on the same page and going to bed at the same time and like all of this stuff as a couple, if you can get your partner helping, keep you on track, and motivate each other, it just makes all the difference.

Yes. I love that. Okay, so watch out for her on the ultimate health podcast, Arianna Huffington. She rocks my world. Love her. Okay, let's move on to number five. Optimizing mental health. Well, being personal growth, community. That's a huge one in social circles.

Yeah. So number five here is kind of a couple of different opposites in a way. So optimizing yourself and then optimizing your relationships in life. So both equally important, and we've just kind of put them together in this pillar. So starting off with optimizing ourselves, there's so many different ways of doing this, and for everybody, it's going to be different. What works for them and what they enjoy. But different ideas could be meditation or journaling, listening to podcasts, stopping and taking a couple of deep breaths, reading a book that makes you happy and inspires you. There's so many different ways of doing this, but we really need to take time to refill our tank and to continue to grow.

Personally, I love that because I think this is. They're all equally important. So I keep saying this is one of the most important ones. But really, even for a relationship to remain happy and interesting, I really think it's our personal job to make sure that we ourselves are complete and whole without the other partner and that we have things to talk about. Because if I keep coming to the table and my husband is growing and learning and pushing himself, and I'm like, yeah, that's school. And I have nothing to say. I think that's really, really big. So I think this creates a beautiful relationship and conversation together. So what do you notice in your relationship that this helps?

Well, this inspires new ideas for us, whether it's new projects or things we want to do, travel plans, it just brings up all kinds of things. It has a ripple effect. And of course, it's just adding to our database of knowledge, too. Every book we read, every guest we interview, every person that we ha out with, and we're very selective of who those people are right now because we've got limited time. So we want to choose the people that are going to actually help us grow, help us learn. And whether that's together or whether I'm going off with my girlfriends and learning different things or exposed to different things and I can bring that back to the table or having the time that's going to help me grow. It's just so important that we do, as you say, have that piece of the puzzle that makes us feel complete or allows our mind to expand. Because if we're not expanding, then we're not growing, we're not evolving. And things can really flatline for yourself and for your relationship.

Wow, that was huge what you just said about being selective about the people that you're hanging around together. Because I think that sometimes as a couple, sometimes we can get desperate for other couples to hang out with, depending on where we live or if we don't quite have couple friends yet, or maybe if we're in a new relationship and we don't have that group of friends together yet. Sometimes you can meet people and be like, okay, well, at least we can go out as a couple. But have you? Well, it sounds like you're super selective, obviously, and Chris and I are the exact same way. Maybe we'll be out with people and right away I'll be like, oh my gosh, like, maybe she didn't respect him how she was talking or he didn't respect her. And I'm like, this can, I will not, because I do not want to be around it. So how do you guys, like, do you know immediately that you're not going to hang out with someone? Or how do you know when you want to hang out with someone?

Yeah, I think it takes time. I mean, it depends on the situation in the couple. But Marnie and I are lucky that we're just really connected in the health world, in the city here in Toronto. And there's a lot of great health minded couples. And I think naturally, like just being in the health world and being in a leadership position, you're going to gravitate towards others of the opposite sex or same sex, depending on what way you go, but you're gonna bring that other person that's gonna compliment you in. So we've just found a lot of the couples in this health world that we naturally gravitate to, that we meet through health shows or just different healthy restaurants or different events. They've just been great couples all around. And Marnie and I have both gravitated to both of them. And it's just been really easy for us. And I Don't know if we just got lucky or not, but. But definitely we're really grateful for how that's just fallen into our laps and the great relationships we do have.

You know, I think it's just the health world in general and because you guys are so saturated in it and you met in it already that you kind of got that space or there's that space of if you're. If this is your main interest, if this is your main gig or your main thing, all of these pillars that you're talking about are pretty much infused throughout their lives. So that is so beautiful. So you guys hang out in the fitness world. Start making this your life. Chris and I met long before. We just like to work out, but we didn't have any of the nutrition stuff down. Like, we were young. We were still in that going out phase. So we had a lot of this navigating to do together. But I love that. And I don't think it just happened for you. I think you guys. Well, now I'm sure you both are super clear. Like, of course, this is your world. You created your world, and you guys just met in this world that you had already created for yourselves together. And that's really, really beautiful. So number six, personal care environment.

All right, this is so important. This is the things that we put around us and on us. And often this gets neglected. People aren't thinking about what are the materials your home is made from, what is that conditioner you're putting in your hair, what's the nail polish? It's sometimes so far removed, you might be doing everything right, and then forget about the toxic chemicals you're exposed to. So this is so, so, so important for people to really dig deep and maybe do a sweep through your home from your kitchen to your laundry room to your bathroom. What are you using, what's there? Or what's just sitting there off gassing. So once you start to make the switch, it's kind of an all or nothing thing. You don't really want to have the detergents or the soaps that aren't holistic or clean or made from essential oils and natural materials. And luckily there are a lot of resources. The Environmental Working Group has lots of lists and research. There's so much out there that you can utilize to help you sift through this or just go to a health food store and you can see what's on the shelf now. Just like anything. Like as Jesse said earlier with the food, you got to be careful just because it's in A health food store doesn't mean that there's not toxins in there or the odd trace. It could be like 1%. You still have to do your own research, but overall, if you can start to make the transitions slowly, maybe change one thing at a time and really make the switch to more natural things in your environment.

Beautiful. So important. So, you guys, I'm so grateful to have you on. I have one last question for you, but I just want to say thank you so much for coming on. I love that you guys do this together. I know that you've probably inspired a lot of people to start this conversation, maybe with their spouse. So thank you.

Yeah, thank you, Lori. This has been a lot of fun. And yeah, we've just been inspired from the couple of conversations we've had with you. So it's great to connect.

So awesome. Okay, so you, and you can answer this one at a time. Obviously you're in an elevator, you have a 30 second ride with somebody and they look over at you with a desperate look on their face and they say, how can I make myself happy? What do you say?

Okay, I would say you really need to surround yourself around great people. And that's been a big theme of this whole conversation we've been having. But if you're around people who are bringing you down have low energy, they just have a pessimistic outlook on life that is going to suck your happiness dry. So you really want to find, and even if it's one person, hopefully your partner, find one person in the beginning that can just create a happy environment for you and you're just going to absorb that from them and you're just going to see a smile appear on your face.

I love that. Thank you so much. Marni, how about you?

I say you need to really dig deep within, find the things that can make you happy in your life that you can do for yourself. Whether it's petting a dog, reading a book, doing a meditation, going on a trip, something that's going to nourish your soul so it can come from the inside out. Because you have to love yourself and you have to be content with what's going on with you in order to exude that to the world. And that may take time or it might come overnight for some people, but once you really get connected to you, it's the greatest source of happiness.

Beautiful. You guys, thank you so much for coming on. And you guys, if you loved this episode as much as I did, make sure, make sure you share it with your friends. Share with everybody that you love. And until next time, earn your happy. Bye everyone. Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the Earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought and honest comment. Tell us what you think, tell us what you want to hear more of. It would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again guys. Bye Bye.