125: Why Loving Money Is A Good Thing - Juicy Money Talk w/ My Husband Chris Harder & Money Myth Busting

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Welcome to the Earn your happy podcast.

I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss.

Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author.

Each week I'll bring you a guest.

Or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul, and get focused and calm clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves. Get ready to earn, own, and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go. Foreign welcome back to the earn your happy podcast and it is time for another quickie, because there is always time to fit in inspiration. And today I have my husband with me, and I have him with me because, you guys, this is so exciting. He has launched his own podcast and I know some of you know that, but it is called for the love of money. And you can find it at for the love of money dot com. And he's on today because I also have an interview coming out with him that will be out this next Monday. So I'm so excited because he asked me some pretty, like, crazy questions, you guys, questions that I wasn't super prepared for. So we got pretty juicy. So, Chris, why did you start this podcast?

First of all, bae, thanks for having me on. I feel honored because even though you're my wife, your podcast is, like, incredible. It's killing it. I almost feel nervous sitting here in the hot seat. You should be okay. Why did I start it? Well, number one, when I read 30 books in 30 days, I noticed this trend. And I was not seeking for this trend, but it was that whether it was the key to happiness, the key to success, the key to wealth, the key to business, the key to everything was giving. It was this common thread that revealed itself about halfway through. I remember I actually came downstairs. I'm like, laura, you're never gonna believe this, but, you know, half the books in. And there's this common thread I'm starting to see, and it's giving. And that got me thinking. It made me realize that the majority of people out there that are, you know, massively successful, whether they're a celebrity or a great entrepreneur, they got there through giving. And I wanted to expose those stories because, I'll be honest, I feel like we live in a time right now where there's way too many people that say, you know, money is greed. And there seems to be kind of this class warfare right now where if you have a lot of money, you must be greedy or evil and almost like there's an honor and struggling. And none of that is true. When you start peeling back the layers, of course there's going to be a bad egg here and a bad egg there. But that goes for whether you're incredibly wealthy or incredibly broke. There's always going to be a few bad eggs. But the majority of the people that I started to meet and started to interview, you realize that they are the most giving people and that is how they became successful. And we've got so many entrepreneurs in our life that want to know how to get there, want to know how to be successful, want to know how to be happy, want to know how to get that break, how to make it happen. I wanted to expose these, these untold stories because they really are the answer to all of those questions. The, the more you give, the more you get back. And so far it's been mind blowing.

I love that. And the thing is, is if we don't get inspired around it or we don't, you know, seek the inspiration or see it, then why are we going to be inspired? To be able to make more money, to do more things, either in your life, create experiences for your family or for people. So, you know, we see a lot of things in the world, and I see this so much, especially because social media highlights it. It's like everybody complains about something but doesn't do something about it. Can you im, if you allowed yourself to go to that place where you believe that you could be abundant enough to create that animal shelter that you want, right. Instead of just posting about it, which posting is great too. But I'm saying don't stop there. Don't put a cap on yourself thinking that you can't create that thing that could actually start to shift the planet. But the thing is, is that we disconnect from money and thinking that it could help. So how could you create that shelter? How could you help those women in need who need to get out of that relationship, but don't have the transitional. You know, there's so many epic things that we can do. But I have to back up a minute because you said that you read 30 books in 30 days. And I don't know if all of my audience knows why you did that, because that's something that I will probably never do. And some people are like, I read a book a year, maybe they've never read a book. Why did you do that.

You know, it was over two years ago. It was a time when I felt like I wasn't showing up as big as you. You know, you were on this rocket ship, doing your thing and obviously given back to the world in a big, big way using all your talents. And I was just kind of coasting and you never indicated it to me, but I knew I was smart enough to know that one day if I kept coasting and you stayed on the rocket ship, that we'd be on different planets. And that's not a good thing for a relationship at all. So it was almost like a wake up call that I needed to do something radical in order to catch up or, I don't know, snap out of just going through the motions. And I came across this guy online named Tai Lopez, who, he's a wildly successful entrepreneur. He reads a book a day, every single day of his life. It's literally a non negotiable fundamental of his life. And I came across him and I thought to myself, if this guy can read a book a day, every single day and still be this successful, then I could probably read 30 books in 30 days and maybe that would unlock something for me. And it stewed like within me for a few days. I remember about the fifth or sixth day, I was like, I have to do this. I don't want to do this, but I feel like I have to do this. It was almost like a divine calling. And so I remember I came to you, I'm like, babe, I'm going to read 30 books in 30 days and I'm clearing my schedule next month and I don't know how I'm going to do it, but I'm just going to figure it out. And I hadn't even read a book, start to finish, in my adult life prior to that. So it was a huge undertaking, probably bigger than it even sounds like. But guess what? It worked. I mean, I came out of that 30 days on my own rocket ship and I'm so grateful that I had that wake up call because it has paid dividends time and time and time again.

Oh, man. Okay, so I know that we were going to talk about something else, but I just have to talk about this a little more because it's so good and especially because it really was the beginning of the whole podcast and the idea around it as well. It was just this up leveling of knowing that you had more to give as well. So what was that point, though? Because I think there's so many men and women who this could go either way. Maybe the wife feels like she, you know, needs to up level because maybe she's sick of her poor me story and maybe she knows her husband is sick of it. Or maybe the wife is like, I'm doing all this work, I'm doing all this personal development, but my husband's not doing this. How did you not turn that into, you know, maybe because it's easy to almost make the other person bad, right? Or attack them or like, why do you need to be doing all these things? Why do you always need to go to these event? Why do you always need to create something new? You know, what was that? What made you feel like you wanted to kind of rise up more into what you were feeling instead of. Do you know what I'm saying?

I do, actually. I had those thoughts. It's not like those thoughts never crossed your mind, you know, oh gosh, another woo woo event. Why do you have to go to this too? Or why do you have to drag me along to it? But you know what's funny? Deep down we know, we know when one person's actions are bringing them happiness and the other person's actions are bringing them unhappiness. And so whether you want to blame it on someone else or say, oh, why do you have to go to all this stuff? Or whatever, that's usually just a front. And you know, like in your gut of guts that the person who is doing the actions that bring them happiness is on the right track and that you are not. And so it was like following my gut instead of, you know, placing blame or trying to separate myself is following my gut. Because I'll be honest, when you've got greatness inside of you but you're doing nothing to unlock it, it's a really lonely and torturous place. It's worse than putting in the hard work to do what your calling actually is. It really is like it's harder to coast than it is to work hard. If that makes any weird sense in any way.

It totally does. And I think what I want to just clarify is if that other person is happy, then that's okay. So they don't have to go to that event with you and they don't have to go to the gym if they are happy. But what it usually translates into is that sometimes that other person really stepping into their happiness, whatever that looks like, even if it's doing less, right? So maybe someone's on a trajectory of doing so much right now and they're just on overload and they Start doing less and they start becoming happy and they start really enjoying life, going on more walks, whatever that looks like.

It's.

It's kind of knowing that your happiness level, maybe you're going backwards. Sometimes when people start getting happier, you can even notice that maybe you're regressing. So whatever that looks like, it's just kind of matching each other in, hey, are we on the same level? Are we both committed to each other and our happiness in this, you know, this lifestyle that we have together? So kind of whatever that looks like. Right, because if you were happy, I would have never really noticed. And I didn't really notice.

You know, the thing is, I was happy. Ish. You ever hear the phrase good is the enemy of great? That's literally what the problem was, is if you're already living a good life, then there's not enough pain to go live that great life. But none of us are going to find our real happiness like that long lasting, unshakable, fundamental happiness unless we're doing what it takes to live a great life. And so sometimes you can almost say you'd be better off if you were in a really bad spot right now, because it forces you to take action. Instead of just being in a good enough spot where there's not a lot of pain, it feels just kind of like a blunt, dull pain. You know, when you. When you're in that good spot, then there's no real drive or push to be great other than you've got this thing in your gut saying, hey, you know, you have the capability of being great and you're not doing it.

I love that. Okay, so that's pretty much where the podcast came from. It was something that he always wanted to do. Something about. Chris, you guys, is that he is so passionate about money, about having it be able to free people, about people being able to earn what they're worth, what they feel, you know, their. Their product is worth, their worth, their. Whatever that thing that they're doing, their business, launch that business, just have no shame or be so proud of it and be so abundant that your cup spills over. To not only create those experiences in that life that you want for your family and friends, but also to be able to have so much, to be able to give back and change whatever it is that you want to change in the world. And that's what I absolutely love about Chris, is that he is so unapologetic about making money and helping people see their worth. So, Chris, what's something with this podcast that's been really cool for you to get across to people what's like a really great message that you love sharing.

You know, it's been really fun actually to pull out of these successful individuals their favorite ways of giving and tying together, how giving opened up doors or giving created opportunities for them that they wouldn't have had had they not given. So I found this trend where, you know, over 20 interviews in now, a lot of times when you go and you give to a cause, there's people that also are giving to that cause that are your ideal business partners or they've got that key to that door that you've been wondering how to unlock, or they've got that one connection that you've been waiting for. And so you don't give to get, but you literally get more because you are there mixed up in the crowd that is already giving. It's almost like you want to run in a circle of like minded people and that's where they are. They're at these places, whether it's a charity function, whether it's volunteering their time, you name it, they are at the places that you want to be and you connect through giving.

Oh my gosh, that is so. I mean, that's so true. We can see that in our lives, how that's happened, different things where we've showed up that we are giving back in a way that we love. Because I really want you guys to get excited about giving. The way that you're choosing to give back and the way that you're choosing to give value in the world and not be doing it, that's another thing, right babe? Like not be doing it because you think that you should or doing it in a way that doesn't excite you. Like find that way that you love to give value because that is that sweet spot, right?

It totally is. And I wanted to mention one more trend that I've seen too. And that is the old adage of it takes money to make money. Absolutely does not apply to being a successful entrepreneur. Especially in this day and age now with the Internet and influencers and all that stuff. It's never been easier to become a smashing success than it is right now. Because the majority of my interviews there were people that were living in their car and then sold their car to pay for coaching that they know they needed in order to get their business off the ground. Or like Danette who, you know, had her kids run around the house and they were able to find $47 and that was their entire net worth as of that day. And, you know, look at her massive success story. I mean, interview after interview after interview. The majority of the people that I've spoken with, they were not gifted a wealth by any means. They were not gifted a break. They were not gifted some startup money. All of them have gone out and found a way to raise the capital or build slowly by reinvesting, you know, the little bit of revenue that they get back into their brand or by living way below the means that they expected that they would live below just for a little while so that they could then have a lifestyle that they never expected they would have. It's really been amazing to see how the resourcefulness, I guess is the word I'm really looking for is far more important than your resources at the moment.

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Amen. Okay, so I'm gonna ask you one more question. I. What. What was it for you? Because I know that we've gone. We've broken so many glass ceilings together, you know, worked through so many different ideas of what we thought we were capable of making together. What. What does that look like? So what was the first big level that you hit that you were like, wow, I had no idea I could do that. And what did that open up for you in terms of what is possible? Because I think what happens is people might be listening to this podcast right now and they might have this next level of what they think could be possible, but maybe it's too low or maybe they could make it higher or maybe what. What is that thing that you think that people need to be thinking or doing to help get them to break through those next levels? Because I know we're always working on levels, you and I. I don't think.

There'S one thing, but there's a few, few really powerful things that have broken a ceiling each time. For me, one of them was the mentality of get bigger than your problems instead of cutting back. And that's something that you taught me. And so let's pretend you got a financial hurdle in front of you, and it's a $5,000 financial hurdle. And to you, that might be a lot of money right now. So a lot of people would say, where can I cut back? Where can I cut back? Where can I cut back? And their mentality is on cutting back in order to solve that financial problem. And let's be honest, most of the time, you really can't cut back that much in order to solve a large financial problem. So when you cut back, what do you get? You get more lack, because it's a lack mentality. Well, what you taught me, and it's because you've done so much spiritual work on abundance and whatnot, is you don't cut back. You get bigger than your problems. And even just saying it, it makes you sit up more in your seat, right? I'm going to get bigger than that problem. I'm going to find a way to get larger than that hurdle. I'm going to find a way to get faster than that issue that forces you to go out and become resourceful, big, strong, aggressive, and get over that hurdle instead of cutting, cutting, cutting, hoping that one day you're able to save enough money to eliminate that hurdle, because that one day usually doesn't show up. So that's one of the things getting bigger than your problems instead of cutting back. Another thing is who you surround yourself with. I can go back in my life and point to the circles that I've run in and the areas I've lived in. And if I were to average those circles out, our income at the time was an average of those five or six or seven people that we were closest to. So if you want to transcend whatever ceiling you're stuck at, then you need to make sure that you are spending time around people that are doing far better than you. It's one of the only ways that you're going to uplevel your game, that you're going to find new ideas that are going to bring you more income and more wealth than you have right now. And that's really going to set your sights higher because it's easy to feel like a big fish in a small pond, and you're always just going to grow to the extent of the pond that you're in.

Okay, I have, like, 50 more questions, and clearly I'm going to have to have you on for a longer podcast, but this is a quickie that's turned into a longy. But you guys, he has the most epic conversations we actually have this conversation on our podcast continued. So if you guys want to listen in there, go to for the love of money.com and we would love if you guys would share this with your friends, your family, your spouses, anyone that you know who really just could use a mindset shift. God, I totally want to ask you more questions, but I'm just going to stop myself. So we'll have you on. We'll have you on again soon, so.

You know where to find me.

So you guys, I'm so grateful for you always. You are absolutely incredible and I really appreciate you always tuning in, sharing, rating and reviewing because that is how we get amazing guests on this podcast. So until next time, you guys, earn your happy. Bye everyone. Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought and honest comment. Tell us what you think, tell us what you want to hear more of. It would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again guys. Bye Bye.