128: Broke Mindset to a Mulit-millionaire Mindset with Chris and Lori Harder

Foreign. Welcome to the Earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author. Each week I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul and get focused on and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves. Get ready to earn, own and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go.

Foreign.

Welcome back to the Earn your happy podcast. And you guys, today I have something for you that I'm really, really excited about. My husband recently launched his podcast for the love of money.com and he interviewed me and it is such a great conversation. I really know that there is a lot of takeaways for people who maybe have some different issues with money mindset or people who are ready to upload, level their lives. So his podcast is really all about helping people break through any sort of financial block that is holding them back. And he literally asked me questions that I was not expecting at all. He said, I'm not going to tell you the questions that I'm going to ask. So he came at me with things that he has never actually asked me before. So he asked me what it felt like when he came home and we lost, lost everything, what I was thinking in that moment of truth and panic and fear. He asked me what it took the year that we went from around about 200 grand per year for the both of us after we lost everything, worked our way back up to that, and then took it to over a million dollars per year. And then it just grew and grew and what we did to really break through that mindset and get to that hurdle that we not think was possible. And the conversation just really is so honest and raw that I hope that you guys tune in and get a lot out of it because I know that no matter where you are, I think that you can find something in here that really resonates with you. And also you guys, I have theblisshabit.com open right now for enrollment and there's so many things that we talk about in here that if you're ready to take it beyond this point and you really want to hear and learn about all of the practices that we talk about in here and take it deeper and really write down what it is that's stopping you, and you want to work through it, and you want a tribe of people to work through it with. This is where you're going to want to go. So it's theblisshabit.com if you're inspired by this conversation and you are ready to take it to the next level and really work through a lot of the blocks in your life and get so grateful for the things that you have right now. So thanks for tuning in, and I hope you love it. Let us know what you think.

Here we go.

All right, babe, you are in the hot seat this time. How's it feel?

First, I want to know if you call all of your guests babe, only.

Four out of five. Okay.

That's cool. I can handle that. I feel amazing. I'm super excited to talk to everybody.

I am so excited. Number one, it's kind of weird pulling these questions out of your wife because you think you know the answers, but I have a feeling I probably don't.

You think you know, but you don't know.

Well, you do it in that voice the whole time.

You think you know, but you don't know.

Okay. Actually, never do that voice again.

Okay.

All right, let's dive right in. Listen up. Everybody kind of knows us, how we are today, and we're in a financial success season, I guess I'd call it. Right. We've had good seasons, bad seasons, and right now we're thriving. And a lot of people don't know the backstory, and a lot of people have no idea how you were raised. So if you have a massively financial, abundant mindset right now, has it always been that way, or what were you views like about money growing up?

Oh, well, no. Absolutely has not always been that way. It's something that I had to work on every day, every hour, every minute. It's still something that I really work on, and I know that I'll be working on it for the rest of my life, because once you hit one level, there's a whole other level out there that you need to start to change your mindset for so that you can up level. So what were my financial beliefs before where I am right now? Well, I was raised in a really religious family, and, you know, a lot of the things that I heard about money were that money is the root of all evil. That was just something that when I heard the word or when I heard money, it was, you know, make just enough to get by and anything over that was really, you know what? While it might be Nice. Anything that was too much over that. And it was really a gray line. Like, there wasn't this, like, you know, what's too much, what's too little? So there was always this fear around money, this constant, like, money is a struggle. Money is tough to come by, but don't get too much, because then you're a sinner. So it was just this constant battle in my head of, money's not good, but, man, do you need it to live your life? Or, boy, would it be nice to, you know, have my parents stop arguing about finances. Because as great as their marriage was in other areas and as much love as they poured into us kids, you know, I remember every single Sunday it must have been, because it was before going back to work on Monday, they would get in some sort of argument over money or stress or something around money. So for me, I mean, man, I really, really struggled with my beliefs around thinking that I could make money, that I would ever have money, that money is something that could be used for good, that we deserve money, that we're worthy of money. Yeah.

It seems like kind of an oxymoron that you were taught you need this to survive but don't have too much of it. Why do you think that is? Why do they do that?

Well, I think. I think what they're saying is, obviously you need to survive, but all of your money either needs to go back toward the work that you're doing, you know, in the religion, or, you know, anything that's too excessive can be considered flashy or greedy. So I'm not really sure why.

So do you think that money is excessive today? Is it flashy? Is it greedy if you have too much?

I don't think so at all. I think that it really. Money is just something that highlights more of who you are. So dependent upon who you are. I think money is just going to amplify whatever it is that you are feeling, doing, being, and however you're showing up in the world.

All right, so you've come really far, obviously, financially. I mean, literally in terms of numbers, but also in how you feel about it. You went from thinking it was evil to saying, hey, there's no such thing as too much. Now, how'd you come that far? What was your journey like?

Well, it's been a long process, obviously, but at the same time, it's not like you go from day one saying, oh, you know, I'm scared of money, I'm not worthy of money, to, I have a millionaire mindset. You know, it's It's a long process. So I think that it started in small ways. I think that it starts with really assessing where you're at. And I really wasn't okay with not making money for working hard anymore. And I think so much of our relationship when I met you, because I was really fearful around money. I think up until I met you, actually I just, I could make money, but then I would either spend it or it would be gone, or I would somehow create some sort of bill. But I was always had a lot of fear money.

It's funny, it's actually funny you say that because, you know, meeting me you're saying was a. I don't know if you're saying it's a wake up call or it started to shift. Your views speak a little bit more on that.

Well, I think the biggest thing was you viewed money differently and your family viewed money differently and all of the people that you hung around viewed money differently. So all of a sudden I'm introduced into this world of people who. Money is just a thing that creates experiences. Money is something that you work hard for, but you are also really excited and proud of the fact that you're earning. You're proud of the things that it can do for you. You're proud of the things that it can do for your family and for this lifestyle. And I really saw the connection to how money was something that everybody also respected and I had never had never viewed money that way. It's almost like viewing money as this, you know, somebody in your life, as almost like a human being or a person or a relationship instead of something that's just this thing that you're kind of repelling even though you need it. So yeah, it was a really beautiful thing to be able to see that money can be something that is number one, not feared, not thought about all the time. And it was a gift that you could use to create experiences, time with your family, things that you can do together, things that you want to enjoy, things that you want to give back to people. So that was the first eye opening moment for me of seeing this family and then all of these people that you hang around who you know, enjoy money and what it can do for you.

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So here you are today, really successful and you have a lot of people that you're still close to in your life that just seem to struggle, like really struggle financially. You ever have guilt around that?

Well, I think that understanding that money is just an energy, it is no more than that. It is a reflection of the way that you are thinking. Thinking. It's a reflection of the way that you're showing up in the world. It's a reflection of where you are in terms of what you need to work on, maybe with your mindset, what you think you are worthy of. And the thing about money is that if I've learned anything because we have given our fair share to, you know, charities, families, friends, different things like that. And a lot, a lot of times if people are capable of making money, so if they're in a place in their life, life where they are capable of making money, but maybe they have a major victim mindset or they have some things that they are completely avoiding in their life that they're not looking at where they could really up level and break that glass ceiling to go to the next level. I think what happens is if you give somebody money and you think you're going to fix it, that is not fixing the problem because it's is absolutely we can't rob people of that rock bottom or that breakthrough because it doesn't matter how much money you give. I have learned it doesn't make anyone any happier. In fact, it robs them of that lesson that money is trying to teach them. Money is just another form of energy. It's literally, if you can view it as a person, it's trying to tell you something. So lack thereof means that you have a problem with either thinking that you are not worthy of taking that job or of doing that thing, putting that program out in the world or you know, maybe you have a lot of fear on looking at your finances. Maybe you're scared to see where you're at and assess where you're at. Maybe it's better or worse than you thought. Maybe you know, there's something that you're not dealing with. You don't even want to know what those credit card bills are that are sitting in your mailbox for the last three months. So it's definitely trying to reveal A problem to you. And what happens is, if you know, the people, if people try to help constantly give back to people who are very capable of creating money and creating an income, we're actually robbing those people of fixing a massive area in their life that is only going to get worse if you don't fix it. So, again, I just believe that, you know, as much as I struggled in the beginning with thinking I could fix problems, I learned so quickly that you can actually amplify problems if you don't allow people to fix their own problems. And sometimes we need to be that voice of maybe we have to say that. And if they're not ready to see it, then they wouldn't be ready for, you know, what you'd be able to provide with that income anyway.

Okay, so how do these people fix these problems, as you phrase it? In other words, there's so many people out there that say they want one thing financially, but the results always stay the same, and that is stuck or struggle.

Okay, so I would say if you're stuck somewhere, because I've been. I've been stuck many times. So let's say that I am. Okay. I just had this. So let's use this example. All right, So I have a couple programs, and I was. I felt as though I was just stuck with this number. And while I'm so. I was so grateful for all the people that I had on, I know that I have a program that can change the masses. I just know that if people get on this program, their life is going to change. So I had a issue. An issue. I basically had a glass ceiling of thinking that, you know, this is kind of the number that, oh, it's a lot of people on here, but, you know, this number is actually what I want. But that seems so unattainable. And maybe my programs aren't as good as I thought, or maybe I wouldn't be able to handle that number of people coming on, or what would that look like with that number of people coming on? And I just had this block around it that I did not even realize. And what I had to do was do more work on myself, like understanding that what I'm doing is amazing work. It is the. It is something that is going to bring people to the next level. I am worthy of it. I will be able to handle it. When that influx comes, I will have the right people. You know, it's a. It's a faith issue. So the more that I'm saying it, the more I realize it's just A faith issue of where can you go and where is your mind limiting you at? And also strengthening your faith practice and your belief in yourself, what you're putting out there, and add more value. So maybe it's, maybe it's that it's trying to tell me, do I need to add more value somewhere? And if I answer, you know, yes or no to that, that's also where the work is. So there's a couple questions you can ask yourself, am I feeling like I am not worthy of this and why? And then say, how can you break through that? What is a mantra or something that you can say or do every single day to know that what you do adds value? Do you need to ask people in your group, do you need to ask people in your life, what is the value that I add? What do you, you know, what is that worth to you? And see how you feel on that, or write down what, what you think that time for you is worth. And also maybe you feel like you're not adding enough value and get really honest with yourself, am I adding enough value? And if you're not, do you need to add more somewhere so that you feel worthy of whatever you're asking, you know, for people to spend.

All right, let's kind of take that and roll with it once. So you have a lot of great programs out there, and sometimes people will give you feedback, you should charge more. Sometimes they say you should charge, charge less. Does it ever kind of kick you in the gut or get to you when people talk about the way you price your programs? And why should people be unapologetic about the way they, they price their services?

I mean, I don't, I don't know if that initial gut kick will ever go away because it's never fun to read. Words are so sharp, right? Like you. Words can give life or give death. And in, in one second, it's like whenever I read a comment that's negative, I feel it for not that long anymore. So. But yes, I feel it. I just want to. I just want to say I feel like people may always feel it, but it goes away really fast if you have the tools and you've really done the work around it. But with that said, I mean, it's funny because in the same exact day, especially if I'm launching a program, I'll have someone tell me that I have underpriced this, like, hundreds of dollars, and then I'll have another person say, how dare you? This is ridiculous. So it's, it's like, like this, it's just crazy because it's all mindset. So you have to get really solid and really rooted in what you feel you are worth. Like, you're gonna, if you're an entrepreneur and if you're gonna put programs out or you're gonna be in network marketing, like you're, you're gonna bust your ass. So what is that? And I mean, it's gonna go in seasons, but you are gonna have that season of just busting rear end, right? So you need to think in your mind, what is this going to be worth for me to show up? 110%. Because you don't. This is one thing you don't want to do. Create the most epic program and then under price it because you think that it didn't have as much value as you may have hoped. And then put it out there and hear everybody's awesome feedback and insane transformations and be like, oh, man, I am so exhausted. I'm starting to resent this program because I'm having to put in more work than I thought. And then you don't show up as much, which means people aren't getting the transformations that they really needed. You need to basically take your price that you think you're worth and probably double or triple it because you are going to work a whole lot harder than you think. So you want to make sure that in those times of grinding, and it'll be amazing because it'll be exactly what you want to do, but you will grind. So during those times, you want to make sure that the money flow coming in, the energy coming in is matching what you are putting out.

Here's something that I'm just now all sudden curious about. What is your worst money moment in your life? Like, can you remember a time when you felt the most down and out?

You know what's so funny? It's really small, but I just want to put it into perspective. I had. I was like broke. I had moved back in with my parents. I was paying rent for my other two roommates because they had just stopped paying rent. I. And then I found out that I had $800 in parking tickets. And I remember that that $800 felt like it might as well been a million. I was like drowning. And I also had some credit card debt. And I literally felt like I was drowning in debt. I couldn't breathe because I had no idea how I was going to all of these different bills and different things that I had coming at me. And I know that that sounds small, but that's where my money mindset was, is I didn't know how I would find my way out of it. Like, I couldn't see out of. I couldn't see my way out. I couldn't think my way out. I basically went into full on panic. And let me tell you, that's, that's exactly where my money mindset was, is I'm not going to be able to make enough money. I'm not worthy of making this money. I'll never be able to get a job. You know, I wasn't thinking entrepreneurial whatso. So it's really your perspective on what you think is possible for you.

Okay, so if that was rock bottom, what's been your biggest financial breakthrough in your life?

Oh, that's a good question. I don't want to say. I. I was gonna say there's been so. There's just so many moments that I celebrate as the biggest. Because honestly, it's not a dollar amount. It's like where you're at, like, like jumping from, like the big leap, right? It's jumping from one level that you didn't think was necessarily possible, even though subconsciously you need to start believing that it's possible and then going to the next. So I've had so many moments like that, really. One being when we started network marketing and we went from, you know, the year that we went from making a couple hundred thousand dollars of income, our household income, to a million dollars in one year. For me, that seemed, I mean, if you would have told me that before, you know, even the year before, I would have never, ever believed you, ever, not. I mean, I know. So that's definitely one of the biggest things that I remember. And for me, I think that removed all of the blocks after that because I realized how much of that is all mindset. And I know, you know, for us, people are like, how did you do that? And, and honestly, so much of it was, I think there were so many things involved. Number one, we started listening to Secrets of the Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker and we did that book in bed every single night. Like we were screaming out loud, I have a millionaire mind. I was really open to. I was so coachable. I just wanted to consume every single word that he said. I wanted to really just go all out on everything that that book asks. And I think that that's gonna be. I think that's so powerful for people and especially couples, if you can both get on board, but if not, do it alone. Maybe find a partner who wants to change their mindset. And honestly, another way is releasing knowing the. Having to know the how. So I think what happens to a lot of people is they're like, yeah, but how, but where's the plan? But how can I believe in this if I don't feel know what it is? You just have to start picturing yourself there already. And you have to be very open to receiving everything that is trying to come into your space. If you think this sounds crazy, then you just need to be even more open. So here's the thing, is that when you picture exactly what it is that you want, right, you start. Your brain starts working for you. It starts creating all of these different questions that you can start asking yourself of, you know, how can you get there? What exactly is it that you need to get there? Who is it that you need to get there, Right? Because you have this picture in your mind. So your brain just starts working on overtime. And on top of that, if you really, really see yourself there, what happens is you really start acting as if you're already there. So if you can start thinking that way, what are the thoughts you would be thinking? Who would you be hanging around? Where would you be going? And then even as you walk around through your day, let's say you even go to I'm just going to use a soul cycle class, you are in that place of thinking that you are going to get to this space no matter what. So guess what that does. It opens up your perception. It opens up. It's like fire. All of your senses are firing and you hear things that you wouldn't normally hear. So you hear this conversation in the corner about a woman who's starting a clothing company, and you just so happen need to interview someone for your podcast who's just started a company, and you want an epic businesswoman, and you want to know exactly how she did it, because it's also going to help your business plan. This is how it works, you guys. The people are placed in your world every single day. But if you're not not thinking that you're already there, you're not thinking of the things that you need, right? So then you're not hearing it.

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So it's a beautiful thing if you can just start picturing it every single day. So I would say five minutes. You don't even need more than this. You can start out with just a small thank you prayer. That's. This is exactly what Chris and I do. You can just say thank you for all of the beautiful things in your life because you have to be so grateful for exactly what you have right now in order to get more of anything. So get super grateful. Maybe one to two minutes of just completely sense drenching your entire mind and body with how beautiful of a life that you have. What does it feel like when you hug your loved ones? What does it feel like to have that amazing cup of coffee in the morning to go and get all of these incredible gifts every single day, have the sun just like you know on your face and experience those things? Think about it. Get so grateful for it that you almost move yourself to tears. And then picture exactly what it is that you desire in your life. See yourself there, step into your own body so that you are there looking out of your own eyes in the experience. So if you want a business or you want to be an epic speaker on stage in front of thousands of people, you have to step into your body and, and see that and feel it. So allow yourself to feel those feelings and then just picture yourself there. Visualize yourself there. What are you doing? What are you thinking? Who are you seeing? Who's saying, you know, that you changed their life? What did your programs do for them? What is meeting them feel like, how grateful you feel just to have these people on your program. So get really, really make it so real to yourself. And I'm telling you that you will absolutely change your life if you do this every single day. There's no way that you will not become a magnet for the how. You'll become so aware and heightened to be searching for those people that you need to get to the how. Because really, I don't think it's as much knowledge as, as it is your tribe and your people and the people you surround yourself with.

That is amazing. That advice alone right there. You know, people can, can radically change their entire financial picture if they do the visualization exercises that we do and kind of release the how and care more about just putting in the consistent work and the how will show up. You know, when I asked you that question, you mentioned the year that we went from about $200,000 household income to over a million. But a couple years prior to that example, when we had a couple hundred thousand dollars household income, I came home and told you we were broke, I was a primary breadwinner and you hadn't really found your career yet and I had lost my job and we had completely lived beyond our means. I've always wanted to ask you this. How did you feel during that time?

I was like, oh, shit, Okay. I mean, I think that. But something else just took over. I just remember something else just took over. Like, well, okay, I think that you just know, you know what I feel like, okay. I think everybody has a knowing that you are capable of more. And I think that's why we are in pain every single day is if we're not doing that thing that we know we're capable of, we experience pain or anxiety because we are on this earth to be successful or share a message. And when I say successful, I. I believe that God, source, whatever you believe, wants us to be abundant so that we can truly pay forward our beautiful gifts, so that we can help change lives, so that we can shift the planet, create experiences that are meant to be experienced in this world. So I think that what happened was I just had a deep knowing that I've always had that finally had to step up. And while I was really scared, I also had what felt like this crazy courageous lion say, well, you've got nothing to lose. Where before I had something to lose, I had comforts. You know, maybe we had some nice things. Maybe we had this group of friends and that just all got erased. So I had nothing to be scared of anymore. And it was probably, it's not probably losing everything. I have to say was the best gift that's ever happened because I thought I, there's no more. Oh, I could do this or I could do that. But letting excuses get in the way it turned into an I must. And I was also just at this point where it's like, well, a clearing is here. Like, I get to do these things. Like, I have to step up. We have to create this other life that we knew we were capable of. But we've just been kind of resting on this. This good, because good was good enough. And we were pretty happy. But both of us knew that we had these other gifts that we were just suppressing. And I know both of us were feeling some pain around it because we weren't as happy as we should have been. Two young people with this big old house and these great cars and, you know, being able to basically do whatever we wanted. You and I were not as half as happy as we were. Even after we lost everything and we started doing the things that we knew our soul was calling us to do, and that was really helping people. And that's a beautiful experience. To lose everything and be happier on the other side.

I love how you said it. It created a clearing for you to say, okay, I got to show up. I got to do this. Did it feel like creating a clearing when we were clearing out the furniture, selling it on Craigslist?

Actually, it did. I think I just got to this point where I think I was sick of not showing up up. I don't know if anybody can relate to that. Like, you get so sick of your BS story of I'm not good enough, or I have anxiety or just finding excuses. Like, I was so. I think I was so over myself in the excuses that actually even just getting rid of everything, like, we. We kind of sold everything to go into this smaller place, right? It just felt good. I was like, I'm over this. I'm over this lifestyle right now. I just. I want to be somebody else. This is the most perfect opportunity to do this. And by the way, you don't have to lose everything or clear everything out to do what I'm talking about. It's just a simple decision. But for me, the physical things, like, it just. It represented so much clearing.

It. Oh, my God, I love that. So when we were going through our muck, when we were going through those moments and everything felt like a financial hurdle, I remember we would be on a walk, and every time I would complain about a financial hurdle, you would say, hey, we just have to find a way to get bigger than the problem. Now most people, they have this cutback mentality. I gotta cut back to save. Gotta cut back to save. Gotta cut back to save. You never had that you always had this, get bigger than your problem, another one shows up, get even bigger than that problem, another one shows up, get bigger than that one. Where did this get bigger than your problem come from?

I don't remember exactly where it came from, but I remember the quote that really stuck with me. I was listening to a Gabby Bernstein podcast and she was talking about having full time faith. So there's no such thing as part time faith. And I truly know that there's no difference between desiring $10 or $10 million. It's only our brain because it's whatever I believe God wants us to have whatever it is that we are desiring because I, you know, it's just like your podcast, Chris, like when good people make good money, they do great things. So it's so true. And it was just this moment of realizing, you know, why, why would you cut back and be smaller and live this smaller life? And I'm not saying go out and be crazy and pop bottles with models all the time. I just wanted to say that. I just have always wanted to say that. But I'm saying if it's, you know, why are we, why do you keep cutting back and thinking that's gonna solve the problem? So there's two ways to think of solving a problem. You can think, there's, that's it. There's only two ways. You either think of getting bigger than the problems that are gonna come your way, because they're always gonna come. They're never going to end. I hate to tell you this, actually, I love to tell you this because that means that you always get to grow and you always will be happy because growth is what truly makes us happy. So you're either getting bigger than any problems that are coming or you're always backing down. Well, guess what happens if problems are always coming, coming. You're backing down, you're backing down, you're backing down, you're backing down, you're getting smaller, you have less, less, less, less, less. So it's just a mindset. It's not necessarily saying, you know, don't ever look at your finances or don't ever maybe cut back in some areas. It's just saying become bigger than those, than the small problems. So out earn it. Create something new, get a different mindset, have a bigger vision, believe in yourself more. Know that you're worth that promotion, know that you can put that product out, get. It's a belief. I totally believe that. It's a belief and a faith thing.

So I kind of put A bow on this section of our life. We've been really broke and we've been really wealthy. Do you think money makes you any happier?

Like I said before, money definitely amplifies who you are and what you're doing, and money can make you happier. But I think that it amplifies the happiness that you are able to create whether you have money or not. So what I mean by that is that money has created some awesome experiences that I wouldn't have had, that I wouldn't have had before, but at the same time, I probably would have created some pretty epic experiences if I was really happy without money, just in a different way. So money can make you extremely happy. I will say one thing, though. Money has been able to eliminate so much stress in my life that. That has made me so much happier. And, you know, it's. It's simple things. Like the other day, able to buy super soul sessions and buy the best seat in the house before it was gone the next day. Like, these are the things that it's like, oh, my gosh, I've always just wanted to do that. Like, it's. It's not a pair of shoes for me. Chris can attest to it. Like, it's really about. I want to just be able to go and do the things that I want and get a really great experience and have people experience it with me and create these amazing memories and just feel like you got every ounce of juice out of life and you did the things that you wanted to do in a beautiful way. And I want to take people with me, and I also want to teach people how to create that for themselves, because that is actually where the beautiful gift is, is being able to have people know that success is completely inside of them. And no matter if you lose a job, get a great job, lose a business, have a great idea, lose a great idea, it's always inside of you. You are the maker of that energy. You are the maker of that money whenever you choose to decide that you are good enough for it.

But you said it's not about the shoes. It's about. About the experience. Who likes nicer stuff, you or me?

You do.

Come on.

You like. Yeah. You do Cars and shoes.

Okay, I might be guilty there. So now we grew up in the Midwest, both of us. Midwest, born and raised. Wouldn't trade it for the world. We now live in la, on the coast. Do you think it's easier to be successful if you're on one of the coasts in a big city compared to being in a Smaller town, you know, anywhere else in the country.

Okay. There's a few train trains of thought here and I love this because I, I don't know if I would be where I'm at today if I was born and raised on a coast. But. Okay, pros and cons. So let's talk about it. Okay, so being on the coast opens you up to about like mass abundance, but it can also open you up to massive lack. So it depends on your mindset. So let's, we'll just talk about the coast first since we're here. So when I moved to la, I was like, oh my gosh, this is a whole nother level of making money, right? So it's like you think you have these goals and you think you're doing okay, which you are, but then you come out here and you're like, what? I mean you have, you don't even understand that people are capable of making the money that they have made in this area. And it's mind blowing. So. And also it's like meeting the entrepreneurs and the minds out here, they don't think that they have limits. Nobody has put a cap on them. Nobody told them it was shameful to not be successful. In fact, it was the other way around. So, you know, we're coming from the middle of the country where it's like you work for someone else. You know when if you have a lot going on or you're super successful, you almost downplay it because you don't want people to feel bad. And so that's something about the coast that it is like people actually cheer you on for the most part. If you're in a good group, which you know, that's your choice to be in a good group. It's always our choice.

Pick a tribe.

Yes, you gotta pick, you gotta pick a really good tribe that they will be cheering you on. Like, you know, I've had people out here be like, oh, you know, why don't you think bigger with that dream? Or why don't you think bigger with that idea, that program? Or couldn't you reach more people or, or what about other countries? And I'm like, dang, I would not have thought of these things back home. So there's one massive bonus. But if you're coming from a mindset of lack or if you're coming from a place of you'll never get that or I'm not worthy or needing it can be a huge challenge out here, right? You can see people and you can look at what they're doing and think, oh, you know, that's greedy, or you can say oh, that's overwhelming or oh my gosh, I'll never be able to do that. So instead of letting it inspire you, you can be completely overwhel by it and maybe even turned off by it. So the thing about that is, is that it's like, what do you want to see as well? So sometimes with people I, you know, I'm just going to use celebrities, for example. So many people out here just highlight what all of the celebrities doing are doing. That is not good. When if you really actually research some different celebrities who are constantly highlighted, they are doing so many amazing things in the world. Whether it's building schools in other countries all the time or giving back or you know, just giving back in major, major mind blowing ways, but it's never highlighted. So you guys, you get what you're looking for no matter what. I decided one day just to look up all the different charitable things that some different celebrities do out here and I was like, oh my God, I'm sitting here thinking these are the most, you know, self absorbed people around. But that's just the way that media spins it. So I'm only using them because you got to do this with people in your life. If there's someone in your life right now who's making a lot of money, a lot of times they're probably not telling you all of the great things that they're doing too. You know, I know so many people that would never ever say that they're giving 10 or 20% of their annual income to charities or that they do some really incredible work in the world that you have no idea what they're doing. So I think if you're going to look for mentors or look for inspiration in making money, you need to look at the entire picture. And going back to the Midwest, I think that there's motivation there. I think there's motivation to want to not be stressed out, want to be someone who doesn't struggle. I think that there is a lot of motivation in pain. I think that there is a lot of, I think that there's massive gifts in experiencing pain and struggle. I just think that it's your choice to either sit in it or use it to complete, completely motivate yourself to move forward. Because pain is always a gift. It's always got a message for you. It's always trying to tell you something. And for me, when I was back in the Midwest, I didn't want to experience stress anymore. I Was so over worrying about my family and if they would have a place to live the next month. I was so over wondering if their car would break down or if my family would be on the side of the road. I was overused, stressing. I didn't want to. I just didn't want to think about it anymore. I was so sick of wondering if I should buy the organic cottage cheese or the super cheap cottage cheese. Like, this is real stuff. I was so sick of it. I just wanted to not think about it. That, that that pain was a massive motivator for me to take care of my family and to buy the freaking organic food that I want without thinking twice about it ever.

I hear a little resentment there.

Yeah, but it's. The cottage cheese gets to me.

Do you remember when I used to get mad over the grocery bill?

You got mad about cottage cheese once. You were like, why is cottage cheese $7? And I was like, do you want to be sick or not?

Hey, it was before you taught me to be abundant.

I know. That's. It started with cottage cheese, though.

I want to ask you a question that I asked one of your best friends in the world, Danette, because I'm really curious. You guys are both driven. You both work your tails off. We're in a position where we likely wouldn't have to ever work again if we didn't want to to. Especially thanks to the residual income from the network marketing company that we have. But you continue to work seven days a week. I mean, you grind day in and day out. Both of us do. When is enough enough? Like, is there a number? Is there a feeling When's enough enough?

Well, there's definitely not a number. Because you know me, I'm totally not a numbers person. And I'm very aware that no number a number doesn't make a difference. You could double our income right now, tomorrow, and I'd be excited for the day. And then your life go, you guys, I know that you're like bs like you are calling BS on me right now, but I swear to you, like, you go back to your normal set point. You just do. So you better find the happiness right now in exactly what you're doing. Because where you are right now. And you can, you can raise your set point by choosing it it, you know, and slowly. You can raise it, and you can raise it and you can raise it personally in your mind, but your things won't raise it. Money won't raise it. Nothing else can raise it but your internal gratitude and happiness and I believe your relationship to Source and that's, that's your set point. So when is enough enough? I am on this planet for a purpose, and we all are. And I, it will never be enough enough. Will I take time off in different designated times to relax and really maybe just enjoy? Of course I will. But at the same time, this is who I am and it's why I'm here. So for me, having people realize their gifts and having people understand that progress and sharing and connection and creation, you guys, we are all creative beings. I don't care if you're like, I'm not creative. You are a creative being here to really share exact, you know, share your personal gift. And it's like you have a really unique gift to share. It's just figuring out exactly what that is. And, you know, the easiest way to figure it out is what do you enjoy doing the most? It could be something as simple as maybe you love to play music, or maybe you love to do art, or maybe you just love to babysit your grandkids. Like, honestly, these are all super important things that you just need to tap into more of them and that is why you're here. So it will never be enough. I'll never be. It will never. I'll never stop wanting to pay it forward and share my gifts and just be creative in the world. Because to me, that's enjoyment.

I absolutely love that you touched on your spirituality in there. And, you know, you've got a great relationship with God. You're an incredibly spiritual individual. Do you believe that you can be highly spiritual and still desire a large abundance of wealth?

So guess who created abundance? That's, that's the whole thing. And I know that you know this. So abundance is created by our Creator. And you know, when, when I believe when really good people get good money or whatever it is, you can pay forward a lot. You can really start looking at the places in life, life that you want to make a difference in. What is something that fires you up, that you would love to change? What is something that, you know, that you could shift in the world with money or with, you know, abundance isn't just money either. It could be an abundance of time, it could be an abundance of friendships. It could be in a, you know, whatever that abundance is. There's so much magic that can happen when you are in an abundant person. So absolutely, you can be spiritual when you are abundant. I mean, I believe it's a gift. I believe, you know, I think that's why some of the most Successful people in the world, they can't even help money flowing to them. I have met so many people that they. They're like, I'm not even trying. I'm not even trying anymore. I'm just adding so much value in doing exactly what I was placed on this planet for the. That I am getting paid more than I could ever imagine. And I would do this regardless of getting paid. It's because they are adding so much value in the world, and they are just sending out so much energy that it's coming back. You guys, energy's just a boomerang. So whether it comes back in the form of money or love or your home or whatever that is, you know, or. Or people, it's going to come back to you. So if you are unconscious, constant, constant output of value, you are going to get it back in your life. And I believe that we also get to decide how we want to get it back. So if you get really intentional, intentional about how you want to get that value back in your life, how you want that energy back, it's going to come in that exact form. Because we're gifted when we give value, we're gifted in the way exactly that we want. It's just how life is.

You know, it's funny. All couples should have to interview each other on a podcast, because I realized how many times I keep saying in my head, oh, I've always wanted to ask her this, but I've never asked her. I mean, we've been married almost 12 years, and half these questions I've never asked you before, which is crazy. So here's another one of those that falls in that category. What is one of your favorite moments of giving you've ever had? And by the way, I'm gonna make you, like, brag on yourself. I do this with all my guests now. I call it two minutes of bragging, and you've got to brag on yourself. You can't get out of it. It.

I'm a huge giver. I'm kind of like that person who's always looking for ways to give, but people don't know it. So I think that my favorite ways of giving, you know, I love that we give back to charities. That's huge. I love that. I love that we give 10% of our income to charities every single year. But I have to say, my. My favorite ways of giving are when we surprise people with really cool stuff. It's like the small stuff. So I like to see the tangible stuff. So as cool as it is to Give large sums of money, which is really game changing. Honestly, I love, I'm just gonna say it because it's one of my favorites too, is helping my family. That's huge to me. So being able to pay for their housing and pay for their cars and whatever is coming up, that's stressful. That's really big for me. But honestly, it's the little things. Like maybe we give a super amazing surprise tip to someone. Or, you know, my cousin recently who's passed away from cancer, we were able to, before he passed on, give him a trip with his kids to Disney World that he would not have had to, wouldn't have had with his boys. So we had him and his whole family go. So that was really, really a beautiful thing. Just these small things that if you see something come up in your life where you could change someone's life, that you are able to give them an experience, you know. And also I am obsessed with just giving little things away. Like if I can see a need, if someone needs an outfit or is really desiring something in their life, I love, love, love to just make someone's day in that way. And, you know, we're able to do that now where before I've thought about it so many different times, like, oh, to, I'd like to do that, or I'd love to do this for my family or take them on a vacation or take them on this epic, you know, to this amazing place for dinner. What would that be like? And those are some of my favorite ways to give back.

So, yeah, it's funny, just for everyone listening, when Lori says she loves to give, sometimes she loves to give to. I don't want to say an embarrassing point, but you, like force people to leave here with things sometimes like, no, please take this outfit. No, please take this, this.

I know it's weird and that might be a whole other issue with like, I need your love, but I don't know.

We'll go there on the next podcast.

That's a whole other podcast.

I'm curious. Who have we not impacted yet? Who have we not given to yet that you like one day you really want to give to this or make a difference to this?

Well, I know that we're looking right now. I really want to have my business, your business, our business business, tied to something where all of our money is going, focused there so that we can. Because, you know, I think it's totally great and more than okay if you guys want to see the impact that your money is making. And I want I want everybody to know, to not be apologetic, to want to feel like you're impacting something. Some people don't feel that way, some do. Don't worry about it. Whatever you feel, find that thing that lights you up and that you're passionate about. Because I think for a long time I was like, like, oh, I'll just give to this and this. And I want to feel really tied to something. I want to see what's happening every year. I want to go back in five years and see the impact that, you know, maybe our finances have made or our friends finances or this group that we've gathered together, all of these people who've contributed, have made to a life or to a town or a village or to someone's education. So for me, I think that I want to. I'm really, really drawn to women and also women in Africa. I want to build for people who don't have right now, who maybe don't have the accessibility of an education that could completely change their world. But I actually really want to know what they desire. So I want to know what it is that they want and get really immersed and familiar with the culture of understanding exactly what they desire and be able to put the money in that way exactly to what it is that they want so that I really have a calling to that I really want to go be able to visit and see what's going on there. But also entrepreneurship, I'm super drawn to that too. So I don't know where that's going to come in. But I do know that I love ideas and I believe we're on this earth too. Like I said, pay it forward, creator ideas, birth them, bring them to life. And I think it'd be so cool to be able to take these new ideas that are innovative, that can really, you know, whether it's just make something more fun or make something better in the world or make the planet better, whatever that is. I would love to be able to help these people get these ideas out into the world.

I absolutely love that. I can't wait to do more. So what haven't I asked you? You know what, what do you want to tell the people about giving or generosity or business or spirituality? I mean, you name it. What have I not asked you that you want to tell everybody? Everybody?

I think I just. It's such a good question. I think that I just want people to know that abundance is a mindset and it starts small. You can start right now by looking at the things in your life that you are Saying I need or I wish or I want or I'm comparing or I'm lacking or I can't do that thing that they're doing because it's already been done. I can't put that program out there because she just launched it. I can't add that thing to my business, even though it's what I really wanted to do because I just saw it. You guys, we all are getting our messages from the same source for a reason. We are all connected to the big idea machine in the sky and we're all getting the same ideas and downloads because the world needs them now more than ever. You cannot. There's not enough people in the world to run out for your programs, for whatever it is for that book that you want to write for that network marketing company that you want to join. That's one of my favorite questions. Is, is this a good time? Do you think it's too late to do network marketing or isn't it too late for this business? You guys, that's. That same question goes with everything. Is it too late for this book? Is it too late for this program? Somebody's already done that. Yes. And the wheel has been invented and they're still doing tweaks on it. So it's putting your own flavor on it. Because the way that I'm delivering this message is totally going to turn someone off than if you delivered it. So we all need the same exact message with a different voice and a different experience. So, you know, I'm not going to relate to somebody who's had a completely amazing, blessed childhood necessarily. Right. Who can't even fathom why would I even be talking about this. I've never thought of money as not a abundant. This makes zero sense. So, you guys, this message has to be put out there so many different times, and it's got to have your spin on it. So be abundant. Let that person, whoever you're comparing, turn it into inspiration. They will become your greatest inspiration. Thank them for blazing the trail. Thank that person who's so uber rich that for a while you were like, oh, what? Why? Why do they have all that money? That's. Why do they need that? That's disgusting. Start looking at the good things that they are doing. Change your entire mind around it. Otherwise you're never going to be able to see it differently ever. So if you want people to cheer you on, you have to cheer everyone else on because your exact mindset about someone else is exactly what's coming towards you. Right? It's what you're attracting. So just be abundant in all that you do. Know that there's more than enough. Know that there's enough to go around and know that you're good enough and that you deserve more than you could possibly imagine.

Wow, I love that. That's powerful. All right, before I ask you the last signature question that I ask everybody, where can we find you right now? What do you got going on?

Oh, man. Well, you know, I always love to hang out on Instagram and I have a couple different. Well, right now I have a free challenge going on and it is. You can still join it even though it's already going on. It's at loriharder.com forward/challenge and I would love, love, love for you guys to join. It's all about quick, efficient, effective workouts. And also the bliss habit has launched. It is open and that's huge, guys. I talk all about gratitude and abundance and creating a clearing. I share so many different stories in there of things that have changed my entire life and mindset and exactly how you can do it too. So that's@theblisshabit.com and if you guys want an amazing tribe of people around you because I really believe that you are your tribe, you become your tribe. That is the best way to up level it forces you into. I don't want to say the word force. It gives you the opportunity to step into the person that you know that you are and really do some things that scare you because fear is like the bullseye. You guys go for it, run towards it, ask it what it's offering you. So that's what that program is all about. It's about turning what you thought were blocks into blessings. And that's@theblisshabit.com you know what's funny?

Obviously, I've taken your bliss habit and I'd swear half of those modules, you know, there's 12 modules, half of them deal with financial abundance. You know, maybe not directly, but indirectly. It's all the stuff that we talked about tonight. It's amazing.

Well, it's all the same. It's literally all the same mindset. So if you have a mindset of lack and need around your body or that it's never going to happen or that you're not worthy of it or whatever that is, you may have that same mindset around money, right? So. So if you have a good mindset in one area, this is what I want you guys to think. If you're like, I'm acing this area, it's all the same stuff. Take the exact way that you think of that thing and apply it to money or apply it to your body. Body. It's just like, take the actions, believe it, do the do. Don't think about it too much. Don't get stuck in resistance. Don't get stuck in the poor me. And don't get stuck looking at the bad examples, right? So just take that place that you're excelling in in your life and apply it to everything.

Love it. Okay, last question. I ask everybody and I get wildly different answers. Why should people be unapologetic about their pursuits of wealth and success?

Because your freedom, your lack of stress, and your happiness is what totally changes the world. Not you being stressed out, feeling small, and not sharing your gifts. And when you share those things, you have no option but to be successful, whether that's monetarily or just in your life with happiness. And it is your responsibility to share your gift because somebody is praying for it.

I absolutely love it, babe. Thank you so much. So many good lessons, so many nuggets, so many vulnerable moments and I know people are gonna take a ton away from this. So thank you so much.

Yay. I loved it. Love you.

Love you.

Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy pod podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought, an honest comment, tell us what you think, tell us what you want to hear more of. It would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again, guys. Bye Bye.