174: Allowing Yourself to Process is the First Step in Helping Others

Foreign. Welcome to the Earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author. Each week I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul, and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves. Get ready to earn, own, and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go. Welcome back to the earn your happy podcast. And it is time for another quickie because there's always time to fit in inspiration. And you guys, I just want to say thank you so much for always tuning in and always listening because you guys are quickly becoming some of my favorite people to connect with. And it's so great to see you, all of you, on your journeys and just hearing about exactly what you're going through and your takeaways from the podcast. Because I can tell you that we are all, all the same. We are all at some level going through or thinking the same things. So it's so freeing to know when we are all sharing the same ideas and the same feelings. It really is beautiful. I know. Brene Brown says shame cannot exist when shared. Right. It can't exist in the light. So we can't feel that fear or that shame around maybe something that we feel that we're not good at or that we don't want to share that we've been through something challenging in our lives or that we feel that we are not good enough in certain areas in our lives. So, you guys, thank you so much. I feel like we get to connect as a beautiful community together and it means the world to me when you do share. So, you know, I want to talk to you guys about something that has actually been weighing pretty heavily on my heart lately, and that is all of the different things that are going on around the globe right now. And a lot of people have been asking me, in light of the, the hurricanes, in light of the natural disasters, the fires that are going on, and, you know, whether it's terrorism or whether it's what happened in Las Vegas or all of the different events that are coming up in the news, how they should feel that they're feeling very scared, they're feeling like they're contracting, they're feeling, like, very fearful and they're asking me how they should feel around it. And I have to be really honest and tell you guys, I'm getting really vulnerable right now. I am still processing how I am feeling. Um, I think it's very important that we do that, that we take the time I haven't been able to. To speak out, which I am now learning that it's so important, or I'm now knowing how important it is to just share the message, that we have to process our feelings, and we also have to share our love and our light and how we feel about certain things so that other people will also share and other people will be able to take their power back and be able to do whatever it is that they can do from that, whatever they have control over. So if we all are living in fear, if we're all scared, if we're all in contraction, if we're all going into hiding, that does nothing for the world. All it. It truly there's no way to elevate the planet. There's no way to get our power back. It's from a very. It's from when you are in fear, you are not in power. When you are in fear, you are not in power, and you are not in faith. So whatever we can do after we process those emotions, whether you guys need to talk to somebody who can help you move through trauma, if you are close to events, or if things are happening in your life that you're being deeply affected by, it's so important not to pass over those feelings, but to definitely find someone to talk to or a trauma center or a therapist or a circle of friends. Sometimes, you know, the other day, I literally just sat with a circle of friends. I said, I want to get really vulnerable. I am processing how I feel about it. And as somebody who speaks to people all the time, I don't know what to tell them. And because I don't know what I'm feeling, and literally what I got back from everyone is tell them that. Tell them that you are still processing. Let them know that you're feeling really vulnerable right now, and that at the end of the day, we have to get back to that place of feeling faith and power and of doing what we can do in our lives. So sometimes we can feel totally powerless, right? We're watching the news, and there's 20 different things going on that you feel completely helpless over. But what can you do in your life to shed more love and to shed more light? And when we take those actions, that is an act of expansion. That is when you get your power back. And that is truly when we can start to help people, to elevate. But we're not gonna skip over the part where we're not feeling right and not processing. So if you're still processing and you still need to talk, go there, allow yourself to sit in a circle, say how you're feeling, find those people that support you, go all the way through the emotion, allow yourself to feel everything, and then come out on the other side and, you know, go to that place where you can say, what can I do in my life right now that would make me feel more love? Do I need more prayers? Do I need to bring in more light into my life? Can I sit and just pray for the people who deeply affected? Can I just pray and bring in love and light and healing and grace for those people? Can I offer a safe haven for people to talk? What can I do that could help somebody remember love? What could I do to help people remember that people are good? How can I show up in the world to remind people that at the core, human beings are love and we are good. And when we connect and we. When we remember when we connect and we want to be a tribe, right, that's when we get our power back. So, you guys, it's truly just giving yourself the grace and the space to process and creating a support system for yourself or tapping into one, and then also remembering that it starts with us, and then it starts with healing ourselves. It starts with processing ourselves, and then we can go out and see how we can share love, how we can help others process, and how we can help heal others. But it starts with you allowing yourself to think and to feel and to see how you can offer your love and light after that. So, honestly, you guys, thank you for the space and thank you for always tuning in. And I pray that this gives you a little bit of, I don't know, just permission to really go to the places that you need to go in order to move past. Whatever you feel is kind of maybe a fear in the back of your mind or something that's been holding you back or something that's been making you feel like you're contracting in your life. It might be some unprocessed emotion. It might be something that you feel like you just skipped over and you're, you know, you're just on to the next and you're onto your day and you're not thinking about it and you're just moving through it. But I think it's really important to say, hey, did that affect me? I'm pretty sure I should process that. I'm pretty sure I should talk about this. I'm pretty sure that I need to share how I feel and see if other people are feeling this way too, so that we can stop feeling powerless and see what we can do in our lives to really regain our power and remind people that there are people out there who love them and to really bring love into everything we do. Because right now, the world needs more love. It doesn't need people, you know, criticizing each other for that. You said this or you said that or, you know, you said this too soon, or I don't believe that, or I. I couldn't process that way. Whatever it looks like, you guys, I'm. We all process in a different way. So giving yourself the permission to just do whatever it is, say whatever it is that you need to say to through and actually figure out what you're feeling and what you need and then how you can offer value to people and love to people, because that is when the world changes, is when we can come from a place of pure love, when we've already dealt with the things that were holding us back and the things that are giving us fear. So heal yourself first. Give yourself the grace and the space. Even if people want you to be speaking out immediately about it or want to know your opinion, give yourself space to feel, to love, to process in a really loving space too. Because obviously our environments will reflect the results that we get back in our mind. So thank you guys so much. I just want to thank you because this is a loving place and it's a loving community. It's a loving environment. And I believe that when we tap into our highest purpose and our highest potential and we stop suppressing ourself and we start hanging around people and tribes that are rooted deeply in love and support that, that's when we can elevate the planet. That is when we can really tap into our most authentic self and put that forward instead of putting out our fear. Putting out things that make people feel like contracting, putting out things that make us feel scared. And I really believe that that energy, when we put a loving energy out, that is gonna be reflected back to us in a bigger way.

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So you guys, thank you so much and I appreciate you and I just really appreciate this space to be able to connect with all of you. So I hope that this helped. I don't know if you guys are in the same space as me, but I just wanted to share that with you today. So you guys, thanks for tuning in and until next time, earn your happy. Bye everyone. Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought and honest comment. Tell us us what you think. Tell us what you want to hear more of. It would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again guys. Bye bye.