182: Getting SO Vulnerable I Could Barf, Seriously

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Welcome to the Earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author.

Each week I'll bring you a guest.

Or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves, get ready to earn, own and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go. Welcome back to the Earn your happy podcast. And you guys, if you are feeling isolated, if you're feeling like you don't have a tribe of women like minded people to really help you transcend from where you are right now into the person that you know you are being called to be, or maybe you're getting that soul calling and you're not quite answering it yet and it's turning more into a scream and it's starting to make you feel feel even more awful than the thought of facing the fear around doing that actual thing. If you're in any of these positions, you have to join me this year at the Bliss project. It is March 2nd through the 4th in Newport Beach, California and it is going to be a life changing weekend. If you've been wanting to bust through your fears and really meet a like minded tribe of people, this is exactly where you must be be. If you're feeling called to this, I want you to go check it out@theblissproject.info right now. It's also in the show notes and who is this event for? You guys really want to get clear on if you're feeling called to it. I want to make sure that you know what is going to go on there. So if you have always had a desire to do something big, but you've always been afraid to follow through, if you feel like you don't have the tools or the expertise to take the next step, if you wish you had that tribe of supportive people, if you're ready to take that next step into the next level, but you have no idea what that's even supposed to look like, or if you just want to feel more fully alive each day and this is absolutely for you, if you want a deeper connection and understanding in your relationships, if you want to become more fulfilled in your own job that you have right now and in daily tasks if you want to know the true desires of your soul and if you're ready to enjoy the journey just as much as the destination, and truly, if you are feeling. Feeling called to expand your spiritual connection, we're going to be doing some incredible exercises, meditations. We have some awesome teachers who are going to come in and really give you the space to understand what that feels like for you, because for everyone, it's so different. But to be able to do it together makes you feel even more connected than you've ever felt before. So if you're interested in meditation, if you want to create a solid foundation for all of your goals and dreams to be built on, or if you just need a mental reset, a confidence booster, and a really. Oh, own your own personal power. You guys, this is the place that you want to be. So there are still some tickets left, but they sell out fast. You guys, in this year will be the best bliss project that we've ever done. We have a really amazing team working on it, and we're adding so many more things than we have ever done in prior years, because I know that when I get the opportunity to put epic women into a room, I want magical things there so that you guys can truly have the tools to create your own amazing transformation and experiences. And, you guys, what happens there is nothing short of miraculous. So if you're ready to create your transformation, if you're ready to step in, if you're ready to have your tribe, this is where you want to be. And I hope that you join us and that I get to meet you and hug you and see you there. So. Theblissproject.in fox welcome back to the earn your happy podcast. And it is time for another quickie because there's always time to fit in inspiration. And, you guys, my palms are sweating right now because, for real, like, they are legit sweating, because I want to share something with you that is really freaky. Normally I incubate things like these for a lot longer. I have these crazy ideas all the time. And when I say crazy, I simply mean just different than the me that I feel people maybe see right now or the me that I think that I portray out into the world. Um, and we all have that idea, right? It's so funny because if we ask people what they thought of us, it probably wouldn't match up to the us that we think that we're portraying to the world. And this truly is a version that we choose, right? It's like this is the Lori that, you know, this is How I show up. This is the outfits that she wears. This is what she likes to do. This is how she talks. This is how she makes people feel. And these are all choices. These are all things choices on how we are going to show up in the world. So some of the things that. That I have been wanting to do that are coming out, and I really think it's because of this book that, you know, you get into this creation mode. Like, you find these times you create, you don't find them. Let me just clarify that. Because finding time to write a book was like Captain Insano. I had to create the time to write a book. But creating the time to get creative has opened up, like, this insane vortex of all these different ideas that I want to do. Such as it's made me want to dance again, which we had been doing for a little while. It's made me start playing guitar, which is kind of off and on and on hold just during this book process. But it's also. I've never shared this, really, with that many people. I've shared it with a couple of my mastermind women. But it's also made me start getting these incredible downloads because I want to do spoken word. If you don't know what spoken word is, it's a little bit like a poetry slam, something like that, that I can't even. I'm so new to it that I don't really even know how to describe it to you. I just know that I have been listening to a few people that I love. I love this guy named Adam in Q. Also Sekou the Misfit and Adam Roa. And there's another woman, too, that I was just sent from, Andrea Owen. Actually, we just had this conversation because she was like, lori, I think that I'm gonna be doing some poetry slam stuff, and it scares me to death. And she's also just written a book. So I think you get in that vortex, it's like. It's almost like you open up so much that you have to put all of these other ideas that are coming to you. And I just. Like, this morning, I wrote one in probably 10 minutes that I just had to get out. It's like these poems were dancing through my head, and they seem so stupid. That is the thing. Like. But the thing is, as I say, they seem so stupid. I also know that they could be brilliant. Have you ever had an idea like that? You're like, why am I getting this stupid idea? Like, I'm not a poet. I'm definitely not a Rapper. Cuz spoken word is kind of usually spoken kind of in a rappy tone. I don't know, maybe I'm getting that wrong, but that's kind of what the people that I follow the flow that I love. So, yeah, not a rapper, not a poet, but I guess I am. Like, who are we to not claim these titles even though we haven't done them? If it's coming through, you. Okay, wow. Okay. I'm preaching to myself. Anyway, yeah, I'm getting all of these different poems that are coming through, and I probably have about 15 now on my phone that are not completed. But I completed one today, and I'm pretty sure I meant to share it. So we'll see if I'm gonna do that, but we'll see if I work up the bravery to do that. But what I wanted to share with you is not to judge these ideas that are coming, but simply to get them up and out and share them in a safe way. So if you have somebody, a best friend, a husband, a partner, a spouse, a circle of women that you can share this with, this is a really great spot to do it. And just say, hey, you know, I feel really stupid doing this. Like, I'm not. I. This doesn't even feel like it fits me, even though it totally feels like it's from my soul. But can I get it up and out and either. If you want feedback, great. If you don't want feedback, just see how you felt when you're expressing what this idea was. Right? Like, is this a. Hell, yes. Or once you get it out there, are you, like, you know, no, that I think I'd lose interest on it. Because for me, I keep on getting interested. But I have to tell you, I'm also fueling the fire. So, you guys, the thing about these ideas is if it's something that you're like, yes, this is on my list of things that must come out of me before I die. Because I have a list like that, right? There are certain things I have to do that must come out of me before I die. I must learn a language. I must play an instrument well. And when I say a language, I mean I really want to know it. Like, I want to know I every thing about the language. I want to know how to swear in it. I want to know. I want to know all the slang. I want to, like, go and have a full experience in another country using another language and nothing else. I want to, like I said, play an instrument. I want to do spoken word. I want to Write many books. I want to dance again in ballroom and compete. There's just a list of things that I have to do. So if it's not on your list, and maybe it's just for you to get up and out to create some room and get some clarity, that's very, very possible. Otherwise, definitely try this on and see how it feels. See if it needs to go on your list of things that need to come out of you before the day that you die. So. And I think that I. I'm so in love with life is because I have a really good relationship with the idea that I am not going to be here forever. The impermanence of life. I think sometimes when we avoid that, that's when we avoid everything else as well, is we just don't have a relationship with the. That we're not going to be here forever. That this might be the only time you're here in this space with all of these incredible people on this planet. Right? So get excited because this is the beginning of getting this up and out, this creative mode or whatever this is. And these ideas aren't silly. They're a part of you. They are a part of you to be fully expressed and felt. So something else that happened. This is the. This is where the plot thickens. Yes. I need some theme music. Bum, bum, bum. For real. This is where it gets crazy. Okay, so I shared this, right? I shared this in my. I have a mastermind with Danette and Lindsay, who I know you guys have heard from either on this podcast who have been on here, know that I mastermind with them, Danette May and Lindsay Sikornick. So every other week for like, the past almost four years now, we have gotten on a call and I shared this with them. Like, you guys, this is what's happening right now. This is what's going on for me. I'm, like, so inspired when I hear, you know, all of these spoken word poets do this, I feel like my soul is bursting and, like, want to jump up out of my seat. I want to make people feel that way. I want to make people vital. I want to remind them of why they're here. I want to make them feel alive. I want to make them feel the opposite of bored. I want to make them feel like their soul is on fire. Like, that's what I think that potentially, if I worked hard on it, I could do so. They were like, oh, my God, yes, this is amazing. You have to go with this. Like, you have to. To explore this. And then like a week Later? Yeah, only a week. This is the only time I had to settle in with this idea. My friend Annette, who's putting on a large event coming up that is not yet announced, so that will be announced much later. But anyway, asked me to speak there, and she said, but I don't think you're supposed to speak. I think you're supposed to do your spoken word. And I was like, you've got got to be kidding me right now. Like, because I end up doing whatever, you know, they. They put me up to, basically, because it's not them putting me up to it. It's a reminder of my soul for the most part. So I'm not gonna do anything that doesn't resonate with my soul. But when she said it, it was a full body, yes. And then a full brain, Hell no. Anybody understand that? A full body, yes. And then a full brain, Hell no. I am not doing that. That. Like, I just pictured me like this white girl up there rapping like, this spoken word, how I wanted it to be done. And it just was like, what are you thinking? But at the same time, I was like, this is so huge. Like, this is such freedom. It's not just freedom for me, but I think it's freedom from the idea that we have to show up as the person that we've. We've portrayed in the past, because the future you does not equate to the past you. The future, you should always be evolving, and it should encompass many different things. It should be so many different things. So, you guys, I want to give you that little food for thought today, and I think that I am working up the bravery to potentially share this poem. So let's see. What do you think? Oh, my God. Deep breath, Lori. So I'm going to share first what this poem came from that I. Why I wrote it this morning. And it might bring me to tears. Because we do things that make us play small. We do things to keep us safe, or we think the thoughts that make us play small. Right? We keep choosing these thoughts that keep us in this same exact place, that we know that, or we think we know we're supposed to be, or we think that other people will only feel comfortable with us in. And we downplay everything. So, you know, there are some people who don't downplay, but I come from a long line of people who. It's all about being humble. Don't take up too much space. Don't be bigger than you. You know, you think you should be or anything like that. If you Guys are resonating with that. You are my people. If not, you're still my people. And I'm jealous of you being able to take up the space that you need to take up. So this poem came from that place of. Yeah, yeah, I'll try this. That's what I was thinking, right? Yeah, I'll try this. I'll write a poem, but I'll make sure it's not too good. Or that when I introduce it or share it with anyone and I shared it with my husband that I downplay at first, I'll say, yeah, okay, this is just for fun. Like, I don't know where this is going. Don't worry about it. Like, don't get freaked out. I don't think I'm good. I don't think I'm ever going to be good. Like, these were all of the things that I was saying before this. When my soul is like, I want to be good. I want to move people. I want things to come out of me that have never come out of me. I want to be willing to take risks and. And I have to start somewhere, right? Even if that somewhere is not the somewhere that I'm going be in the future. So that's where this poem came from.

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So I think I'm gonna share it. Oh my God. Okay, So I've got this one poem, but it's just for fun, so it's not that good. I mean, I'm just kind of messing around. I was just bored and I don't expect it to resonate. Laurie, play it safe, my brain whispers. I mean, I'd hate to be misunderstood but what if people could look and see what I already know but hide? You see, when I close my eyes I'm on stage and riffing and rolling and soling and free flowing Allowing myself to fall so faithfully through the unknowing that is the place it awaits and it's where I'm most free okay, snap back, turn the brim around again I'd hate for them to think I think I'm that bigger version of me See, I don't need to share or get good or keep going I'll dim my own light I'll take no chances yes, that's my familiarity this lack of expression has me fitting no place I'm a soul with no face. I hold no point of grace for myself, no compassion. I'll remind myself to make fear my first knee jerk reaction. I won't make the room. I need to assume to let go and slip into that dark liquidy delicious creation that causes your desires to have magnetic attraction. She screamed, laurie, take up space. Could I possibly. If I believe this new story and claim my own glory and say I am what I know I am before I show my tell and be the me who is that incredible, brilliant manifesting illumination of something so much bigger, but is simply asking to be expressed through a brave little poem for the time being. Okay, okay, okay, okay. It starts here. Rewriting what this should say or saying what I should write from a me that comes later after the vulnerability. Yes, I'll write it as the future me. Time is here, not there, and it's happening everywhere. It's then and now and past and present. It basically does whatever I says it. Here's the best part. If time is irrelevant, I choose the future of me. Now Act 1 is coming to you from the most empowered version of me. To be or not to be. It's not a question, but a decision to burn the bridges, scorch the boats, take the island, torch the moats. The time is now. Stay in the fire. It reveals the how, the why, the who, the what. It's the me right now who has the power. It's the me right now who knows she must. Wow. Okay. Okay. I immediately want to erase that. That. And I think I'm gonna leave it. So that is me getting super vulnerable. I dare you to get vulnerable with me because I'm about to have a GD vulnerability hangover. So go for it, you guys, go for it. Go for it. Okay. I'm sending you so much love today and hopefully, you know, however that lands, if it made you terribly uncomfortable because it was just bad or terribly excited because it landed, whatever it is, don't apologize. Let her out. Let him let whatever it is out because you will be free. So you guys, I'd love to hear what you're going to be sharing and your vulnerability with me. So I'm sending you so much love. And until next time, earn your happy. Bye, everyone. Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one, one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review. If you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought and honest comment, tell us what you think, tell us what you want to hear. More of it would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again guys. Bye bye.