242: How To Take Back YOUR POWER

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Welcome to the Earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author.

Each week I'll bring you a guest.

Or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves. Get ready to earn, own, and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go.

Welcome back to the podcast. It's time for another quickie because there's always time to fit in inspiration. And I am actually in New York City in my hotel room. I just checked in. I had an amazing night in Boston last night doing my book tour. And I have to tell you that even though book tours are an insane amount of work in travel, they are worth every single moment and then some. It is a very massive dream come true. To be able to be in the rooms with all of you and really talking about the stuff that really matters, the deep stuff, the stuff that I want to know about all of you. And having you all connect in every single room is just the most magical thing that I could ever possibly experience. And it's really bringing up a lot around just all of the questions on how to really reach your highest potential and how to truly connect with other women. And obviously, if you've read my book, these are completely correlated. And that's what the quickie is going to be about today. It's just some of the questions that come up in these rooms as I'm going from city to city and really finding that we're all asking the same exact questions, not just about connecting, but about being really afraid to take the leaps, to take the first steps, to do the things that need to be done to reach your goals and to really break through. Because I'm finding that a lot of people are saying that they feel, feel stuck and they don't know what to do. But what I want to do is I want to challenge all of you who are saying this and who are thinking this, because I do the same exact thing. Let me tell you that right when I know that I am going to, you know, break, if I have a feeling that I am trying to go to another level or if I'm attempting to break through something and if I'm asking questions a lot of questions outside of myself. If I'm trying to ask a lot of different people different questions, well, how did you do this? Yeah, but it's so hard. I don't know how to do this. I'm not sure how I'm going to do this or how I'm going to get there. I'm just wasting time. When I start asking a lot of external questions and instead of actually taking action, I know that I'm just wasting time. So when I say things like I feel so stuck, I don't know what to do next. That's my version of procrastination. Because I'm stalling, because I actually just don't want to. Because I know that the next level of life is going to require a lot of new things, a lot of really uncomfortable things, a lot of energy that maybe I don't feel like outputting yet. It's going to require that I'm probably going to have to let go of some comforts, Meaning even the comforts of my old personality. Meaning I might have to go in more rooms that make me uncomfortable and have to get really intentional in those rooms to connect with people. Meaning that I might have to share what my desires are or really let people know that I would either love to work with them or what I have going on, or that I'd love to collaborate, whatever that looks like. And that is scary. So instead of actually doing those things, it's so easy to say, yeah, but I'm so scared. Yeah, but I'm shy. Yeah, but I've never done that before. Yeah, but I don't know how. Well, none of us came out of the womb knowing how. We just had to do it.

Right?

We just had to do it. The thing is, we get stuck on focusing on the pain instead of the motivation. Like if when you were little and you first started riding a bike, if you focused solely on the idea that if you got on this bike that you did not know how to ride yet, and you focused only on the idea that you could crack your head open or skin your knees or it was going to hurt, you will never ride that bike. So that's what's happening to a lot of us is that we, we're going in these rooms or we're sitting at home and thinking of all of the things that could go wrong. And we're focusing on the fall, we're focusing on the wound, we're focusing on the pain, we're focusing on the worst case scenario. Well, hell no. You're never getting on the Bike? Hell no. You're never going to go in that room and put yourself out there and expose who your highest self is, because you don't feel like that self yet. You're so afraid that people will laugh or that people will judge you and that the pain is going to be too intense. But just like riding a bike, you guys, because you were so focused on the end goal, the freedom, the fun, the fact that you could now join this awesome neighborhood bike gang, right, that you had so much fun with, that you were fine scraping your knee, you were even fine hitting your head. I mean, if you were an 80s kid like me, I was like, that's okay. Just, just knocked my head on the pavement. I'm fine.

Right?

Helmets were a little bit after that. So you guys literally focusing on the freedom, focusing on the happiness, focusing on the idea that you don't have to live with regret anymore, focusing on the idea that you actually get to choose this life of reaching your highest potential, of sharing your gifts, of reaching your goals. And when you're choosing anything but it's because you're choosing to, to focus on the pain and you are choosing to stay in the suffering. And it's just all honesty. It's just freeing you to know that you have the power. Anything else is literally just saying, I don't have the power to do this. And you're giving it away to something small, such as your fear or the first time or the idea of someone laughing at you. Yes, they are going to laugh at you.

Yes, you're going to skin your knees.

Yes, you might bump your head, but you're going to get back on. And then you're going to feel, feel what it feels like to have the wind in your hair. You're going to feel what it feels like to have those connections with friends, to see places that you could never, ever, ever have seen without learning how to fly on your bike, right? Without learning how to truly just master that thing. And what happens is it just gets easier and easier and the painful things don't seem quite as painful and you get over them quicker because you're used to it. You know what it's worth doing to you. You know that it's okay if you skin your knee or people say things about you because you can just get back up and go to a new neighborhood where everybody is awesome and you don't have to listen to that crap anymore or you don't have to feel the pain, right?

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So I want to challenge you that if you're saying that you don't know where you're going or you don't know what to do, I want to challenge you to say that you're just not wanting to face this new level of pain. So anxiety. Anxiety is truly looking forward at life and thinking that you are going to be in pain, right? It's future perceived pain. Anxiety is future perceived pain and you're living in it. So what can happen is just switch. You can just simply pivot and start focusing on the goal. Focus so hard on what your life will be like when you do the things that you want to do. And do not lose that image. And every time it goes back to the pain, say no, nope, I'm gonna just switch it and I'm gonna think of the good stuff. And you have to say this over and over. If you listen to any of my quickies, you know that I am trying to pound this into you because life has pain in it. But choosing to stay in it, choosing to suffer, is your option. It's that time to pivot and focus on the good, focus on the joy, focus on the people that are coming, focus on what's coming, focus on the feeling, focus on expansion, focus on massive connection with your creator, with source, with God, with new friends, with whatever that looks like. And don't look back. If you're listening to me right now, don't look back. You can't move forward focusing on low level feelings and energy. Get out of there now and look up and focus up. You guys, I'm sending you so much love today. I hope I get to see you on my book tours. I will have a couple left by the time that this comes out and I'm just sending so much love and I hope that you are enjoying the quickies, enjoying the podcast. If you are, please share them with your friends and until next time, earn your happy. Bye everyone.

Thank you guys so much, so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it. That would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought and honest comment.

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