288: How to Prepare for the Tests Life Throws at You

We become afraid to step into our light, to step into our truth, to step into our purpose. Because we're afraid of these tests. Because we're afraid of these tests. And what I want you to start doing is to say, bring it on. Welcome to the earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author. Each week I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves, get ready to earn, own and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go. Welcome back to the earn your happy podcast. And it's time for another quickie because there's always time to fit in inspiration. And this is your last chance to get a ticket for my book tour. If you live anywhere near Atlanta, Austin or Chicago, there are still some tickets left. But this is your very last chance to go and grab tickets before the event because by the time this comes out, I will basically be en route to Chicago. So Friday I leave for Chicago to do the Chicago event on Saturday. Tuesday is the Austin event and I cannot wait to see you there. And Thursday is Atlanta, so grab your friends. I have people driving from all over the place to come to the book tour. If you want to meet your like minded tribe, this is exactly where you want to be. I'm telling you, if you are ready to go after your dreams, go after your goals and you really want the support and you want to meet people and you want to leave ready for your goals and for the new year, you want to be in this room. Here's the deal you guys. Throughout my life, the most important thing I've done is to get in the rooms with people who want to do the same thing, who are thinking in the same ways. Do what you need to do to get in this room. If it's in your heart at all, it is a game changer. Even if it's a challenge to get there game changing. We are going to have so much fun, connect to you, connect to your soul, deepen your connection to yourself, to Source and to all of the amazing people in that room. I'm telling you there's going to be magic that comes out of it. So don't miss it. You can go to a tribe called bliss.com right now to go grab your last minute tickets. So thank you guys so much for everybody who's coming. I can't wait to see you. It's literally the most fun thing and this is something I'm so looking forward to right before the holidays to connect with all of you. So I will see you there. And today's quickie. I just got back from the Oprah Winfrey cruise, so Omeg Hal cruises, so Holland America cruises. And it was really the combination of taking an adventure and total immersion and completely getting outside of your bubble to go on the high seas and also do personal development and connecting to your tribe and connecting to yourself. So it was all things that I love to do on a cruise ship, you guys. It was amazing. I truly had just some of the most profound experiences. And I'll tell you, it's because so many of the people that were on board and who showed up at the sessions literally were not necessarily my exact demographic and they offered so much insight and value. I took my assistant Evans with me on this trip, who was such an incredible help. And you know, I think the thing that surprised us the most is we had so many lunches and dinners with awesome, incredible human beings who just were maybe in their 50s, 60s, 70s, sometimes 80s, telling us their life story. And it blew us away because we are all the same. We are all the same. We all crave love, we all crave connection. We all want to be doing the things that are written on our soul. And there's certain things that stop us. And there was so much wisdom that came out of these beautiful meals with all of these people and just these connections in the hallway or, you know, being on excursions with awesome ladies who are all friends who are in their 60s and 70s and telling us what made these friendships work. And I'll tell you that some of the big themes were that you are going to be tested. And that's what my quickie is about today, is that all of us are stopping. Not all of us, a lot of us are stopping because of the tests that come with what you want to be doing in life. Whether it's just a hobby that you want to start or whether it's that business that you want to begin or whether it's that foundation that you want to start or that dream that you want to chase and follow. It doesn't matter what it is. And please don't be ashamed of your dream, even if it's making ceramics or Becoming a celebration, celebrity. None of that should ever be apologized for. If you could see in the grand scheme of life that everything that was given to you in that dream that's on your heart is there for you to chase for a reason. It's there for you to get. It's there for you to live into. Because you are a part of a massive system. And it's so vital for you to play your role in order for everybody to show up in the way that they're meant to show up. So by you showing up and by you committing to that dream and that thing that you want to do, you're giving other people permission, and it's helping a system. We all need each other to live into whatever dream that is, even if you don't have one. And you just want to be an amazing mother or amazing wife, or you really just want to help out in your community, or you want to be an amazing family member. This is all so vital. All of it. All of it is vital. But we get stopped by these tests. And I want to tell you right now that the bigger the vision that you have, the bigger the tests for a reason. Because the bigger the vision you have, the bigger the responsibility on the other side. And who in the world are we to think that it's just going to be easy? I want you to think back to all of the things that you've ever learned in your life. And the biggest lessons don't come from the easiest things. Yes, they're enjoyable, but they're not coming from the easiest things. So I want to read a few quotes on Tess, because throughout history. I was just reading Carolyn Mrs. Book, which is incredible, called Sacred Contracts. And I keep referring back to it because I really do believe that we all have a contract to fulfill in our lives. And other people play roles to fulfill contracts in our lives as well. And those contracts aren't always good. And in fact, if you can look throughout history at all of the main teachers and role models and spiritual teachers and guides, they all got tested at an extreme level. If you research Jesus, if you research Buddha, if you research Gandhi, they all got tested at extreme levels. And majority of these tests were from people who were close to them, right? Betrayals from people who were close to them, tests from family members, tests from people directly in their community, best friends. And there is a reason for that. It's because we would not learn from the people who are not close to us, right? We'd be like, oh, whatever, I'm gonna write them off when it's close to us. That's when we really have to dig deep. We have to have faith, we have to lean in, we have to pray, we have to trust, we have to surrender. And those are all of the things that your dreams are made of. Without trust, without faith, without surrender, you're never going to reach them. And unless you get extreme testing, you're not going to have to use those things. So this is from Lincoln Pats. Before the fruits of prosperity can come, the storms of life need to first bring the required reigns of testing, which mixes with the seeds of wisdom to produce a mature harvest. Second quote, this is Sandra Bird. We should not therefore be afraid of testing others or of being tested ourselves. It is only by testing or being tested that we understand whether the substance or the person is as it appears to be or is merely masquerading. So if you want to know what you're made of, you'll lean in and you'll surrender and you'll accept that test with open arms. So I'm going to read a couple more quotes, but that's first. What I want to say is we become afraid to step into our light, to step into our truth, to step into our purpose, because we're afraid of these tests. Because we're afraid of these tests. And what I want you to start doing is to say, bring it on, bring it on. Because you're not doing these alone. This is your faith practice, right? This is your faith practice. Lean in, surrender. Understand that feeling scared and not feeling good is a part of it. It's the human experience. But we don't get to test our faith and we don't get to actually use it and strengthen that muscle until we get these tests and say, oh, my God, this feels awful. This feels terrible. I would give anything to offer this up, but I'm just gonna sit in this fire. I'm gonna sit in this fire because it's going to burn the old me away. It's going to burn the old idea of fear away. And I'm gonna lean in. It's okay to be afraid, but it's not okay to give up, right? It's not okay to give up. Sit in it, stay with it. I promise you this is where your faith will come in and it will all soon wash away. Time will definitely help you with this and you'll be able to lean in and have that faith. So next quote, if you truly have faith in your convictions, then your conviction should be able to stand criticism and testing. So in the beginning, and this is da Dashane Stokes. I believe Dashane Stokes. And this is about really knowing that when you get convicted by what you believe, when you truly feel convicted by your message, you'll be able to stay in it and you'll know that no matter what, if you choose to believe it, right? Because we can be like, oh, my God, is this really how I feel? Choose to believe it. If you know in your gut that that initially is how you feel and that's your message, please stay in that choice no matter what. Guess what? People will leave you, friends will leave you, you will get criticized, and you keep going back and saying, do I know this to be my truth? Am I okay? Even if I don't have these people, do I still know my truth and do I still have my faith? The only way faith can be tested is by extreme measures. And these tests aren't going to come all the time, one after another. Typ. And sometimes they do, sometimes they do. But you have to learn how to support yourself. So this is a huge thing that I believe in. Don't resist the tests, get ready for them, right? Don't resist them, prepare for them. So if you know you have a huge test coming up in college or in high school or elementary school or wherever you're at, if you know you have a big test coming up, don't avoid it, right? You're going to stay stuck, then they're going to hold you back. You're never going to be able to pass it. Don't avoid it, prepare for it. So I know that I have tests coming all the time. So what I do is I prepare for it with my support system. I prepare for it knowing that I need a conversation around whatever's coming. I prepare for it knowing that I have a soft place to land with the people in my life, with the books that I'm reading, with the podcast I'm listening to. I prepare for it knowing that if I get tested, I'm still gonna go on that walk in the morning. I prepare for it by knowing that I'm still going to make sure that I have self care. I'm gonna have good food in my house. I'm gonna take care of myself, mentally, emotionally, and don't resist it. Don't resist the test, prepare for it. Don't resist the test, prepare for it. It's how you pass.

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All right, one more quote. God will never tempt you. It's not in his nature. In fact, he promises to provide an escape route for every tempting situation. But I can promise you this. God will test your faith. And those tests won't get easier. They will get progressively harder as the stakes get higher. And those tests will undoubtedly revolve around what is most important to you. So that's Mark Batterson and you guys. This is so true. And bring on the test. Because every test that you get strengthens you. Every heavy load that you have to carry only makes you stronger. And these tests are not forever. And the faster you take a test, the quicker you get done with it and the quicker you gain that strength. So remember that. Bring on the test. Prepare for the test. Don't resist the test. Know that everybody has testing anxiety and support yourself around the test. So I'm sending you guys so much love today and bring it right? Let that be your new mantra. Bring it, Bring it on. I'll learn how to prepare for it as I go. I'll learn how to better support myself. I'll learn how to lean in. I'll learn what it really means to have massive faith, to alter everything up and to know that no matter what happens on the other side, I accept the worst case scenario because I know that I am connected to something so much bigger. Nothing can harm you. That's earthly, you guys. That's what I wanna get across to you. Lean in. Nothing earthly can truly harm you because you are a soul connected to something so much bigger. And you don't get to really understand that until you get these giant tests. And I'll tell you, tests have been flying at me and I am just like full faith leaning in knowing that people historically have, you know, let's just look at, let's just look at our time right now and say you throw an event, 10 people show up, right? Or zero people show up. You put out a program, zero people show up. You don't get to test if this is really what you want to do, or go back to the drawing board or lean in and have full surrender until you get Something like that. It's all of the people who fall off and say, oh, maybe this wasn't meant for me. Oh, maybe my book sucked. Maybe I had so much criticism around different things. Here's the deal. You do not get to get better, and you don't get the reward unless you keep showing up, no matter what the result. Here's the thing. The dividing factor is the people who just give up because it didn't go their way or their comparison mode. And they're thinking, why isn't this happening for me? Serve the people who show up, even if it's one, keep going, even if it's zero. All that does is help you refine what you're meant to do. I'm telling you, if you're throwing in the towel, if you're afraid, if you're not giving up, then I'm saying right now that you don't actually deserve and you're not ready for the things that come on the other side of these tests. So if you believe that this is in your heart, show up when there's only one serve at the highest level that you possibly can. And just know this is how it looks. I have no idea where people got the idea that it wasn't hard or that they wouldn't feel like a failure or that years of their life wouldn't suck. And you'd question everything about what you're doing. Like, where did we get this idea? It's these highlight reels, right? It's going to be tough. Keep going. All of a sudden, one day you're gonna show up and you're gonna understand why those things happen to you. Because the bigger the mission and the bigger the reward, the bigger the responsibility and the bigger the test. Because that is how you know where your faith is at and where you need to lean in and where you need to go back to the drawing board and tweak. And where you need to surrender. Stop controlling. Start asking where you can let go and where you need to serve at your highest level the most. You guys tap into, pray, into meditation. It's the only way I survive. It's the only way I survive is to lean in and say, I surrender. This isn't looking how I want it to look. So how do you want it to look? How can I serve? How can I show up? And this is what I'm practicing today in the biggest way. So sending you guys so much love. I hope that wherever you're at, if you are being tested, please know I am sending you so much love. Love and support because I know what it feels like if you are being tested. Hang in there, stay in there, say a prayer, meditate, lean in, surrender, let go. Know that you are not alone in this boat and then something beautiful is coming your way and it's right around the corner and you can choose for that to be today, to really get back into gratitude, to say thank you for everything that I have, despite this not going my way. Thank you for using me. Thank you for these messages. Thank you for me being able to share this painful experience with other people later on so that they can know that they are not alone. So thank you guys so much for just being on this journey with me through highs and the lows, through hardly anyone showing up at events to people showing up at events too. It doesn't matter if people show up now still having events where I'm like, where is everybody? Are they coming? It doesn't ever end, you guys. It doesn't ever end. So, so much love to you today. And until next time, earn your happy. Bye everyone. Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought, an honest comment, tell us what you think, tell us what you want to hear more of. It would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again, guys. Bye Bye.