320: What Shift Did You Make To Get Out Of Victim Mentality?
23 Jan 2019 · 41 min
Lori Harder answers how to escape victim mentality. She says process your pain privately before sharing it publicly, reframe hardships as strengths that help others, and stop taking criticism personally. The shift happens when you see life as a lesson instead of something happening to you.
Chapters
Actually, it was very powerful for me to be like, oh, man, I've been in victim mode most of my life, so it was powerful for me to be able to start to look at. I'm going to help all the people who are stuck in victim mode as I overcome this. Welcome to the earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author. Each week I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul, and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves, get ready to earn, own and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go. Welcome back to another episode of questionably awesome, where we decide that it's awesome and you don't get to question it.
No questions are welcome except for the.
Ones that they actually offer. And we'll be answering all of those. Yes. No questions about how awesome this is or not.
No questions about that.
Yeah, unless it's super awesome. Then you can ask that question.
Yes.
Yeah. All right. Did you follow?
Is everyone unquiz.
Okay. Evans.
Hey, Laurie.
Have we shared? And I think that we have. That we have a morning song for you.
Ooh, wait, you know it?
You know our morning song?
Oh, that you and Chris sing?
Yeah.
Thank.
Thank heavens. It's heavens. Wait, I added to it, though. Oh, remember?
Oh, yeah.
Thank heavens. It's Evans. She knows what she likes. She doesn't walk to work. She rides her bike. Yeah. Every morning. You thought it was gonna be better than that? Here's what I'm gonna tell you right now. If you want a happy life, lower your expectations and sing and sing. It's gonna be way better.
That's all. That's the answer. That's all, folks.
And thank you for tuning in. Leave a comment? A nice one. Only five stars and only a. All right. So how was your weekend?
My weekend was really great.
You had a big celebration this weekend?
Yes, it was my friend's baby shower and it was so beautiful.
Didn't you have something else?
Oh, my boyfriend's birthday. Like, no, there's nothing else. I don't know.
There's nothing big. Nothing significant happened.
Just the man I love celebrating his day of birth.
Okay, first, give me one cool thing about the Birthday celebration. And then I. I remember you told me something cool about what they did at the baby shower. Oh, yeah.
The best thing about the birthday celebration was the cheeseburger that I had was out of control.
So. Tell me about it, please.
Perfect cheese to meat ratio. I apologize to vegetarians who are not enjoying this, but I imagine it would be good on a vegetarian patty as well.
Yes. The cheese was probably amazing as well.
It was amazing. Bunch all around. Great situation. Good pickles, fries. Nailed it.
Sounds amazing.
Very healthy.
Yum. Okay. And that was at the. What was it? Pally house.
That was the hotel. And we went to this place called Golden Bull for little hamburger steak dinner.
Fun. So funny. Like, as you get older, your birthdays are just kind of like. Actually, I just want to be with my loved ones and have a meal. Yeah.
I just want a burger.
Yeah. Like, don't get me wrong, sounds more like your birthday.
Yeah.
Did you kind of take control of that or.
He. He. He had. He did that.
What did he want? Is that what he wanted or did you surprise him?
He wanted a steak dinner.
You know, it's funny. I feel like Chris is always like, I don't know. As long as you're happy, I'm happy. What do you want? I'm like, hey, it's true. Good man. We're gonna go eat some kale again. All right. And he's like, oh, God, no, not again. I'm like, well, you let me decide. So. Okay. The baby shower, too. She do some really cool stuff?
Yes.
You showed me a picture. It was to die for. Oh, my gosh.
So this amazing girl who did portraits when you got there, she colors portraits of you, and they're the cutest thing ever. And I think she's in la, so maybe I should see what her name is.
Yeah, you should find her handle, because that was so adorable.
I know what her handle is. Chasing linen. At Chasing Lennon.
Yeah, at chasing Linen.
Okay.
Because I loved them. I thought that that was the coolest party favor. Like, just a little.
It was so cut.
Cute.
You'll have to look her up.
Yeah.
She also has a podcast called the Modern Creative Podcast.
Oh, my God.
Isn't that neat?
I wonder what we can learn to do from the podcast.
I know. I don't know. We'll have to tune in.
Maybe it's like listening to Bob Ross. Yeah.
Happy Little Trees.
Which, by the way, I was just watching stories and it was. This is so random, but it was Rachel Platten watching Bob Ross, and she was saying how she's like, oh, my God. He was, like, personal development, ahead of his time and, like, quoting all these things. And it really was. He was, like, motivational speaker while painting trees. Because he was like, now, here's where you gotta take a risk. But only the good things come when you take a risk. And he, like, you know, because your picture's already painted. And if you're gonna add something to an already painted picture, like, maybe the final tree, like, you can really eff it up. Like, that is risky. So risky.
But Bob knew.
Bob knew that you can have an already good painted picture, but if you want greatness, you're gonna have to risk it all to add the final pine.
You just. That's it. This podcast is over.
Mind blown. Final pine.
Are you gonna be bold enough to add that final pine or not?
Do it. Do it. Add the final pine.
Add the final pine. Because you weren't put on this earth to just put a little twig.
One less pine to have a little twig. Yeah. Even though those are important, those are supportive. Yeah.
You do need twigs.
Never underestimate the power of good twigs. Twigs are good.
That was also my mom's dog's name, Twig.
Really? That's rest in peace. Rest in peace twig. He might be running around actually helping us some.
Loving it.
He's like, I'm here, actually, and I'm drawing my final pine. All right, so 40 quote time.
You go first.
Okay. All right. So these quotes are about kind of like where we're at or how we're feeling. And mine is about. Well, I'll read it to you first.
Okay.
It's random, but great. It's by Jacque Barzoon.
Ooh.
Yeah. Or Jackie Barzan.
Yeah.
So in Producers, loafing is productive. And no creator of whatever magnitude has ever been able to skip that stage any more than a mother can skip gestation. So loafing is not something you do in the morning.
Nope.
Or something a baker does. Well, technically, we kind of all do. Loafing is like. Loafing is productive. Procrastination.
I like that.
Yeah. Now, to all of you natural procrastinators, this quote isn't for you. Because you gotta take some action and get off your keister. That's right. But this is for people who don't loaf enough.
Like you.
Yeah. Like, I need to buy loafers to remind myself to be like, loaf. Can't skip it.
Yeah.
Just loaf around for a little bit. Hashtag, just loaf.
Hashtag just love.
Because I. Okay, so what's happening to me Right now is like, oh, New Year, tons of ideas. I have no lack of ideas that I know will be super profitable and amazing and I will enjoy them. Except what happens is there's many ideas and it's not that I need the idea, but I've never given myself actual space for more than like a week or two weeks to be like, what's actually coming through for me. But I'm feeling this bizarre, like, period where I'm supposed to just like, look and observe at all of these ideas.
Yes.
And the gestation period, like, don't skip over this, like, every. Because the ideas keep evolving so clearly I'm like, okay, stop.
Right.
And you have amazing things right now. Focus on that and see what happens. So you can't skip over it.
You can't just like, caterpillar has to get in that cocoon for a little bit.
Uh huh. And if you pull it out early, it's going to be like a cat.
Yep.
And a pillar. And you're going to be like, what is this? It's not a butterfly. It's not a butterfly.
It's not ready yet.
Yeah. And you can't, you can't even build a house with one pillar. And nobody wants a single cat.
No. You got to have more than one. For sure. Kind of a bunch.
Yeah. So thank you. Lori.
Let's just get a bunch of cats, loaf around. It's fine.
Get a pillar, put a plant on it. Hey, do you remember this trend real quick before I get your quote?
Yes.
Random. Do you remember home goods? Oh, yeah, it still exists. Okay, awesome. Yeah. And I bet we can still get pillars there. But do you remember pillars were like a staple in the 90s and 2000s.
Yes. With a plant on it or something.
Yes. Like, pillars were like, here's my home. I have many small baby pillars and I have large pillars in the corner with plants on them. And if you were lucky, you might even have pillars holding up your living room.
That's true. If you had pillars that were separating your den from your kitchen.
High class, heavy hitter.
I want to be at your dinner party.
Exactly. Me too. And you know why? Why? There were pillars on their table too.
Oh, yeah.
Candle pillars. You guys, when I first met Chris, he probably had no less than 25 pillars around his house. I'm not shitting you.
He's a big pillar guy.
He is. I was like, wow, are you from Rome? Because you have a lot of history in here. I mean, how old are these pillars? I can't tell if these are a.
Thousand Years.
Or if these are five minutes old.
That just says a lot about Chris.
Like I, I, if you, if I didn't know better, I thought he had his own mold in the back. Like just popping out pillars.
Just loves pillars.
That and fake flowers too.
He must have gone to Michael's.
I think he just stuck to Home Goods.
He just stayed there.
Yeah. I don't think he probably ventured out to Michael's.
I think that's a lot, a little overwhelming.
Yeah. But I think that Home Goods probably brought in those flowers. Yeah, that was nice.
He probably just bought the display and I was like, I could see Chris being, I just want this whole thing. How much do I have to pay for it?
That's exactly how he was. And like he wanted his house decorated. So I think he was probably just like pillars and flowers. Yeah. And you know what, it was honestly like back in the day, I was like, wow, this guy like decorates and like, yes, I was very impressed with this place. But then I really started counting the pillars and I was a little alarmed.
Too many pillars.
Yeah. I was like really confused.
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Anyway, moving on. Tell me your quote.
Oh, it's by J.K. rowling and she says, we do not need magic to transform our world. We carry all the power we need inside ourselves already.
Wow.
Isn't that good?
I like it. It's like we all have an inner wand. We do. Can I just tell you something about that woman? What? I went to Harry Potter World and they are making so much money off of wands. Have you seen them? I almost did. I almost bought into Wand World. It's ridiculous. But let me tell you why. Why? Because the wands activate things around the park. So these kids are standing. I'm like, what are these kids standing in a line for? Because there's like this big random line in the middle of nowhere and I look up and they're, they're all like, they're like 1, 2, 3. And they point their wand and the wand like unlocks this clock that's like. And then it unlocks this door. And so then the kid is done, and the next kid is pointing their wand. I'm like, don't they get that? Nobody's actually, like, they're. The wand isn't working.
But.
No, but the wands do have an activator in them. Probably like a battery or some sort of sonar.
Sonar?
I think sharks use sonar. I don't think that's what the wand uses, but I like that. I will say it was very cool because I almost got a wand because it. Like, you'd walk in. In the windows. Like, you could activate, like, cooking a turkey or something and, like, baking bread or, like, opening something or turning on a light. Like, it would tell you, like, wave your wands at the windows or whatever.
So that's really cool.
Yeah. Like. And yeah. I was about. J.K. rowling, about waving your wand and being careful about it, but just wave it around. Yeah. Just keep that. Keep that wand safe, though. You know what I'm saying? Yes. Make sure it's a real wand.
All right.
So just. Just to make sure. So these wands are in this. Here's the thing about the wands.
What?
This might not seem important right now, but it is.
It has a lesson in here.
I gotta figure that out. Yeah. Thinking on my toes. So there's wands everywhere, and I pick them up. I'm like, these are actually beautiful. They look like they're whittled, but they're also just stamped out. Do you know what I'm saying? Like, they look. And there's 30 different flavors of wands. Whatever you want. Yes. And I pick them up, and I'm like, like, does this say $70? Like, does this say $35?
Does this.
Like, they're all different prices. And I was like, here's what I want to talk about. Never underestimate the power of a silly little idea that you think is silly and little and it's not. Or that someone calls silly or little and it's not at all. Because you never know when you are the next wand maker.
Yes.
You know what I'm saying?
J.K. rowling writing those books on cocktail napkins.
And that is not even. And I'm only saying this because the wand is only an extension of what her little idea has, like, started.
Right.
It's out of control. Like, there's so many things that can come if you're thinking big and if you just don't care. Yeah.
You just follow your heart.
By the way, that roller coaster, have you been on it?
No.
It's only 15 seconds long.
That's a little disappointing.
But you guys don't let that mess with you. Like, go anyway. Just don't wait in line for more than get the fast pass, but don't wait in line more than five minutes for this, or you will be like, I couldn't believe it. My mouth was on the ground. All right, but here we go.
Here we go. What's the.
Are we getting the queue?
Yes. Do you want your review of the week?
Yeah. Oh, my gosh.
This is a great one. This is from Victoria Plummer. She said, I absolutely love all the wisdom and laughs that Lori imparts to her listeners. It literally brightens my day listening to her questionably awesome days with her assistant, Evans. I laugh the entire time. I stopped my workout and wrote this review because I couldn't stop laughing at her and her husband's podcast together. Besides being really funny, the show has so much value for growing entrepreneurs like myself.
Victoria.
Victoria Plummer.
Thank you. And I want to know what your wand moment is. What's your magic wand? Oh, girl.
Girl. Victoria.
Victoria. Victoria. Your name is in Gloria. Gloria. Okay, so Victoria is getting a mug.
Or a T shirt. Yes, she is.
And she's gonna be getting that by mail.
She's gonna get it by snail mail, and she's gonna love it.
And you know what? I hope you like your mailman, because technically, we just activated you seeing your mailman.
Oh, yes, we did.
Yeah. Activation wand. Welcome. Woop, woop. Okay. Thank you for that beautiful review. That makes me so happy, because there's another listener that's. We're up to four now. Yes. Grateful four. Hashtag grateful.
Blessed.
All right, so question.
This is a really great question, and it's from Nicole Wilson.
Love her.
Love her, she said.
I mean, I don't know if I know her, but love her. You love her. Okay.
She said, what helped you slash? What shift did you have to make to tell your story? Feel your story, from less of a victim mentality to more of a journey lesson mentality.
All right, Putting on my thinking cap here, switching modes. So for me, in order to do that, I do think, for me, there were times when it was too soon to tell my story. Number one, I. I did not have. I hadn't processed it yet, so I. I needed a safe space to process my story, first of all. So if you're feeling like a victim in your story, a lot of times, we can start by shifting on our own. You don't necessarily need people at all to do that. It's just like A huge support to be able with people. For me, I had to start looking at understanding that my story was actually what I was going to teach. And actually it was very powerful for me to be like, oh, man, I've been in victim mode most of my life. So it was powerful for me to be able to start to look at. I'm going to help all the people who are stuck in victim mode as I overcome this.
Yes.
So I also looked at all the reasons why I'm going to be able to help so many more people through that story. So I think healing it, processing it, and knowing that you went through the story to help people who are currently in that story, that is such a powerful place. Without it, this is so crazy because so many people come to me and they say, I don't feel like I have a story. And that's a whole other conversation. Not for this one. But I want to say, a lot of times our stories is where our strengths and our power comes from, is overcoming it and knowing that that's going to be the people that we can talk to. And that's also where our strength came from, is overcoming that and turning it into the why you must overcome it and get through it. Yes. I love that. So what. What's something, Evans, that you feel like has helped shape you? That was challenging.
Ooh, my parents got a divorce.
Yeah.
And that was challenging for me because it brings up new family dynamics and new people in your life, but it challenges you to keep your relationship with your parents strong.
I love that because I've actually heard from people like, oh, well, your parents weren't divorced when you were growing up, so you wouldn't understand. Or I had it really hard because my parents weren't together. Like, still using that as a crutch, which I completely. I get it. But that would be where it's so easy to go into victim mode instead of, wow, this could be something that's really helped me understand a lot more people or help me get closer as individuals to my parents.
Right. You get a lot more alone time with your parents.
Hey.
Okay. And this is exactly what I'm talking about. You've now created a story as to why that was actually of benefit for you.
That's great.
Yeah. Instead of focusing into why it wasn't.
Right.
So that's how you overcome it. Yes. Create a story as to why the thing could be of benefit to you and how it has strengthened you and your character. Whether it's strengthened you to be able to forgive faster, to be able to let go faster, to be able to move through something faster, to not take things personal. There's a million different things.
So many things you can learn from everything.
I love that.
Me, too. So good.
All right.
Didn't turn you into a bitter Betty?
I don't think so.
No. I mean, not yet. I'm like. I'm pretty sure. I know. Unless you're hiding her. I don't know you. The second you leave, you're like, bitter Betty. Just kid. If your name is Betty, we can. Beautiful Betty.
Yeah.
Beautiful Betty.
Yeah. Either one.
Bodacious Betty.
Bodacious Betty.
She's listening.
Hey, that used to be a word. It's probably not an acceptable word anymore, but they used to call you a Betty. Like a. It was a Billy. Like, it was a surfer term.
I didn't know that.
Yeah, that's kind of cute. But it's a good. Like a Betty. I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know what's good anymore.
I don't even know the terms anymore.
Somebody let me know.
Let us know the terms.
Just kidding. Don't. Let's go.
Oh, Nicole Wilson had another part of that question.
Go, Nicole.
And it's a little different. She said, what advice do you have for someone who is putting themselves out there to the public one?
What should we expect?
What will she avoid?
If you see people holding tomatoes, like, avoid it.
Get out of town.
Get out of town because they have something for you.
Yep.
For a person who's putting themselves up more, don't take anything personal. That's my best advice. Honestly, I could just go to town on this one, because you're going to get people's opinions when you're putting yourself out there more, and it's amazing. You're also going to get people telling you how awesome you are. And you get to help people, obviously, is number one. So focus on the fact that in order for your audience to hear you and find you, you have to speak loudly and you have to be clear and you have to be consistent. And when they find you, they're going to love you. They're going to thank their lucky stars for you. You're going to impact them and you're going to change their life. So please focus on the fact that you are literally, by you showing up, you are fulfilling your purpose and you're changing lives, and we need you desperately. You have to focus on that. Yes. Because what's gonna happen is one person is gonna say something and you're gonna.
Be like, this is Horrible. It's gonna hurt your feelings.
It's going to hurt and it sucks. And that's okay. So I guess the main thing that I want to say here is like, feel it. Delete it, please. Depending on how you want to respond to it, I highly recommend. I think no response is a very powerful response dependent upon how much you want to engage in that particular negative comment. If it's something I definitely have friends who are like, hey, if it's something that I know, I could, I could say, hey, just want to inform you, this is how I actually feel. Thank you so much for your feedback. If it's something where it is a logical person saying some feedback that could actually be useful, right? Definitely respond if you want to. But if it's something where it's just argumentative, please don't engage. Like, do not engage. That is energy that could be used for good and shifted and you're wasting it. You're literally chucking it out the window into the garbage dumpster.
And you could be using that energy to paint your pine tree.
Oh, you're painting your final pine.
You're painting your final pine right now. You don't have time to worry about that other stuff.
No, you literally just took a break from your painting and you went and you like drank poison.
That's not good. That sounds awful.
It's awful. But that's what it's compared to.
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Hey, guess what? There's another question.
I can't wait.
It's from Aylor Q. Wilmot Q. Almont. If you could be doing anything else in life, what would it be and why?
Oh, T.Q. and those last questions were great, by the way.
I agree.
So, okay, let's see. If I could be doing anything else, what would I be doing? Like, is this anything?
Anything?
Oh, I'd be a performer, hands down.
I knew you were gonna say that. Oh, yeah.
I'd be a singer or a. I would be a singer, dancer, comedian.
Ooh, you can still do that?
Yeah, I'm kind of working on it.
Yeah, your variety show.
Yeah, I kind of, like, have that little secret opening thing that might be happening somewhere.
You heard it here first.
You might want to come to the Bliss project.
Are you gonna cut someone in half like a magician?
We're still testing that out.
That one's still in. We're test mode.
No one's gonna get cut in half at all.
Everyone's gonna be amazing and whole there.
You're gonna come out Maybe you'll feel like you're in half when you get there.
You're gonna be whole. By the time you leave, you're gonna be a whole person whole. Like, for the. Yeah, for the. Is there a song? Wholehearted. There is, isn't there?
Wholehearted.
That's it. I don't know. Yeah, you're gonna be a whole person. And what was the question?
The question was, if you could be doing anything else in life, what would it be? And why that.
Oh, you know. You know the wisdom I want to impart on this, Please. I do want to say I am not those things right now, but I know that I have those things in me, so I'm bringing them forward. I'm not good at these things. Like, when people are like, oh, yeah, but you can do that because you're you, or you do this or that. I'm like, like, no, that's even worse when people know who you are and you're like, I want to sing, and then you're bad. So, like, I truly remember when people were like, oh, you went from bikini and figure competitions to fitness. They're like, oh, well, that's easy for you, because people, like, know who you are in the fitness world. And I was like, no, it's not easy, because I don't dance, and people have an expectation. So. And I'm not saying whatever, poor me. I am saying there's two different. Different things going on there, because people can now start to have an expectation. Like, oh, yes, you should be good at this, because you're out in public, and you're used to being in public. And I'm like, but I've never. Never done that, performed a song, or written poetry in my life. But I'm putting it out there. So it's very. Yeah, so do it. Like, add it to what you're doing. Like, if you. I am not kidding you. If you work. Here's what I love about what. What. What flight crew was that?
Southwest.
Yeah, Southwest. Like, honestly, I love companies and businesses, and anywhere anyone can give themselves permission right now to be like, you know what? I'm a performer, or I love. I'm a performer at heart. I'm a singer, even though I'm not. Like, you can start incorporating those things into your job. And that's why it's like, some of the happiest people in the world is because they can just create what you wish existed.
Be themselves.
Yeah, there's so many people that. Okay, so I was just on an interview with a girl, and she had created. She was interviewing me about my book with like 30 employees on the call. And she had basically created a position where she's like, you know what this company needs? A place where the women can kind of come together and support each other. Because it was a really male dominated industry and she wanted the women to have. Have a space. It was so cool. A space to, like, process and connect because the women weren't very connected. And she went to, like, her higher ups and pitched this idea like, hey, can I get these women on a call and create this little community? And now she's like leading this community and she created it. So create what you want. And if you're like, oh, my company doesn't do that. You haven't pitched it 10 times, so you don't know if your company does that or not.
Sometimes all you have to do is.
Ask, ask, ask, ask multiple times. I don't know of anything that's worked out without me asking. Like, you know that call I have tomorrow, that's like a really nice big call that I'm very excited about again.
I do.
What was it? Five emails, A lot of asks. Yeah. And I. We even knew her. Yeah.
It was nice ask.
Yeah, Very nice ask. You a nice ask?
You got a nice ask?
Yeah.
Ma', am, I hate to.
I hate to see you go, but I love to watch you leave because you got a nice ask. You ask all day long.
Q, Q, Q, Q, Q.
What's next?
What's next is from Caroline Underscore.
Fing.
Sorry if I mispronounced that.
I wonder what her parents were thinking when they named her Underscore in the name.
Underscore. That's a cool middle name.
It was very, like, they came from a very clerical family.
They were accountants. And Caroline asked.
I love you, Caroline. Thank you for letting us joke about your cle name.
Like your clerical name.
No, it's not your real name.
She's wondering, what do you do when you are faced with unkindness and fear?
Ooh, I typically cry, so. But for real, unkindness and fear. Yeah. I acknowledge it. I'm faced with it every day.
Right.
I think I'd be lying if I said, like, there's not some form of, like, unkindness or fear every single day. And not in a horrible way, but in, like, there's some days that are worse than others, and there's some days where there's none at all. Like, there's very little, first of all, for fear. In certain areas, fear is gonna get less and less if you face it and acknowledge it and talk about it, like, I think it's so powerful that you're even asking about it. Because the more that I share my fears with other people, the smaller they get. Because I find that I'm not alone in my fear. The more that I isolate myself and don't tell people how I'm feeling or I don't talk about maybe the unkindness that I. I'm afraid of. Yeah, it can get worse. So for unkindness, I don't give unkindness, like, any time. I just don't. It's like when people are rude to me. If I allow that to get into my realm or if I take. If I take it personal, it's. That's on me. So the unkindness thing, I'm like, I've got two choices here. If it's really bad and it's someone who's constantly being unkind, I can stop. And I've said this a lot, I can stop stepping in front of the bus. Like, if you know the bus is going to run you over and it doesn't have brakes, get out of its way. And it's your fault if you keep stepping in front of it and you know it's not gonna stop.
Yeah.
So avoid it. Stop talking to that person. Get it out of your life as much as you possibly can.
Yes.
Even if it's family, stand up for yourself and say, I love you, but I'm not going to continue to participate. Participate in this. And then the other one is just. If it's something that is just randomness, forgive it. I let it go. I'm like, ooh, they're in a rough spot. I'm like, you need a lot of love. And I. If it's a comment or whatever, block, delete. Bye. That's my life. And then for fear, I mean, it just depends. What do you do for fear?
Face your fear and it'll disappear.
Yeah, that's a good one. Yeah.
It's not always that easy, but that's usually what happens.
Oh, man. Like, you must so your fear. Because you have a lot of phone calls to make on the daily.
Yes, but I'm not really scared of the phone.
No?
No.
Like, even when it's asks and like, where you, like, have to ask for things that don't feel great. Oh, I don't tell things.
I don't love that. But you just gotta do it.
Yeah, you're really good about that. You guys listen to this one. So we're gonna take Some advice from. From ECRAD today.
Oh, man.
So here's the thing, though. No, it's so great. Like, we'll. We'll say something like, trying to solve something maybe with, like, a hotel contract, because we have a lot of events that are coming up or. We always have a lot of events.
Yes.
And she's got to do a lot of negotiating and figuring out and, like, talking about hard stuff and, like, asking for challenging things. And she will. Like, we'll be like, okay, well, what should we do? And she's like, you know what? I'm just gonna get on the phone right now.
Yeah, you just gotta get on that phone.
You, like, mandate it. You just tear that.
That.
Tear that puppy right off.
It's just eat that frog first.
Yeah. Like, you'd be a good waxer, you know that? Oh, do you wax your own brows or anything?
No, I don't.
I really should. But your brows look great. No, you shouldn't. I just didn't know if you did them or someone else did them.
Nobody does them at the moment.
I have a terrible waxing story. Tell it. I don't. I can't really tell it. Oh. I mean, I kind of can.
Next time.
It got real intense. I went through a phase where I was like, I'm gonna do everything myself to save money, so. And I was good. Like, I worked at a salon, so I knew how to wax my brows and my mustache and my chin and my chest. I'm just kidding. Hey, you never know.
Hey, there's no judgment for anyone.
No judgment or chest. You might. You want to do. I might have. You don't know.
I don't know.
You're gonna keep guessing.
I don't know.
Anyway, so I. I decided to wax some lady parts. You don't know if it's my chest or my butt. And it just went awry and it got real bad. And Chris came home, and I was crying and breathing heavy, and it was real bad. But you got it fixed hours later.
Oh, no.
Oh, yeah. Sweat. Almost passing out. Don't wax yourself unless it's on your face.
So it's emotional.
Yep.
That sounds real painful.
It was real bad.
I'm sorry that happened to you.
It's okay.
It's.
It is something that I'm trying to heal. So I feel like when I bring it to light. Yes. Yeah. Now it can go away in isolation. I was feeling ashamed, but you have.
Nothing to be ashamed of.
And I feel like it's a PSA to be like, no, you know what? 30 bucks, guys.
Yep. Just say it for a little bit.
Pay it, pop up a lemonade stand, and you can be happy.
Earn it.
Earn it.
Earn that wax.
Earn it. Don't burn it.
All right.
Is there another question?
You know, there's not.
That's it. Awesome. Well, this was a great one. I feel like we really left off on a good foot there.
Waxing and painting tricks.
Wax on, wax off. What was that from again?
Oh, oh, Karate Kid.
Oh, yeah, that's. Did you do the stance?
What stance?
The karate kids dance when you were young. The kick. The crane.
Oh, the crane. That thing.
Yes. If you didn't see it, she just popped her hands up, but she did.
It like a dinosaur.
Like with chicken hands. Like with. All right, so, you know, if you haven't done the crane yet today, do it. It's good for balance. Do the kick up and hashtag crane and tag me. Don't do that. You're going to pull something.
Don't do that.
You know what? If you do it, just warm up. Warm up some warm wax.
Warm up some wax and call it a day.
So you have three seconds to impart a sentence of wisdom. You should see your face right now.
Oh, no.
Three seconds. Impart a sentence of wisdom that you feel you've been tapping into lately.
Don't worry, be happy.
I know there's always something. Okay, I love that. Don't worry, be happy. And no one said it better than Bobby McFerrin.
Yep.
From.
Just get out there and do your best and let your light shine and dance the night away and sleep until you have your rest and take your vitamins and don't be mean.
That's the best advice, literally, in the most simplistic form. So you heard it here. And if you need more wisdom, tune in next week to questionably awesome, where you'll be questioning if this is awesome, but you won't be able to answer.
Three people next week.
Yes.
Exciting.
All right, everybody, thank you so much for being here. So much gratitude to you, and make sure you share this with another friend that maybe you don't like to get them back. All right, have the best day. Bye. Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing. Amazing. And we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought, an honest comment, Tell us what you think. Tell us what you want to hear. More of it would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again guys. Bye bye Sam.
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